Unrappin' Drakken - Chapter 1 - Get A Job

This story is not for profit. It's just a story I wrote to entertain myself, and those lovely people who asked me nicely for a sequel.

Summer Gale sat looking at her empty glass. She had lost count of many gin and tonics she had actually consumed over the many hours she had been here. Her unsteady hand ensured that some of the alcoholic beverage never made it to her mouth. She had used her once precious scarf to mop up the mess. It wasn't like anyone would care about her turkey neck anymore. Her career was officially down the toilet. After tonight she doubted she would even be able to find a job with Rupert Murdoch.

She was sitting in dive called the Average Goon Bar. It was the only place in Upperton still open for her needs. The lighting was low, and the tables were bolted to the floor. The pole on the stage pretty much encapsulated the vibe. The entertainment had gone home, as had the majority of the mostly male clientele. There were still some stragglers. And none of those would ever be found in daylight.

After this evening's debacle, Summer doubted she would see daylight as a journalist in the near future. She would miss the perks being on television provided her, the luxury boxes and corporate events. Most of all she would miss the free booze and the opportunity to meet emotionally unavailable men.

For years now, Summer regularly visited the office of her executive producer, demanding that the station give her more airtime instead of working behind the scenes. To placate her, the executive producer would on occasion send her out as the entertainment reporter. Entertainment reporter! She was a serious journalist. An award winning journalist at that. But she was not ready to give up any opportunity to appear on television and took what she was given.

Summer wasn't exactly sure why she had been demoted. She knew she had a personality that people didn't take an instant liking to. She was also not a team player. Summer was sure the role was a cruel joke. But deep down she knew the real reason for the promotion had a lot to do with Kim Possible.

When the college student was still a teen and just beginning her career as a hero, Summer was sent out on a live broadcast to report on the wild weather conditions in Middleton. Thinking the live cross had ended, Summer had a made an off the cuff remark to her camera man about Kim being a goody, goody two shoes that had no idea what she was doing. Well, that's what Summer wished she had reported. The actual comment was a lot cruder. The complaints flooded the station for days. She suspected that someone high up in the newsroom probably owed Kim a favor and didn't appreciate her derogatory comments. Not long afterwards, the station had sent out a memo that the delay was mandatory on all live reports.

Days before the Abstract Expressionist Exhibition, Summer had many heated discussions about her role on the big night. As far as she was concerned the opening should have been the lead story. It wasn't every day that Middleton was in possession of such prestigious masters. The producer would not give in. He did not have the same faith in Summer as what she did in herself. The cross over was not going to lead the news that night.

Summer's assignment was to provide the fluff piece for the entertainment segment of the late news. A three minute expose of the who's who of the Middleton Regional Gallery. What she hoped was the scoop of the year turned anything but.

When Drakken and Shego stole the centerpiece of the show, Summer thought the timing couldn't have been better. And then Shego went one better by momentarily taking the local hero hostage. A scriptwriter couldn't have written such a story. Summer thought she could get back to doing what she did best, serious journalism. She could finally kiss the fluff goodbye. And best of all, the pièce de résistance, she could finally show Kim Possible as the fraud she thought her to be.

Once again the annoying red headed hero and her bumbling sidekick ruined it. The blond idiot had ensured that she had no footage to broadcast. No footage for the lead story. No footage to even complete a three minute puff piece.

When Summer and her crew returned to the station, the executive producer and chief of news immediately marched them up to the office and took turns in taking strips off them. Neither could understand how amongst the high drama they nothing to show for it. They were seasoned professionals for goodness sake. Other news crews had managed to successfully salvage what they had and ran the story first. In fact, their rival Middleton station had ran with nothing else. The station's sponsors were bound to notice and the situation would not be good for the bottom line.

The disgraced crew were informed that the still shots taken by photographers present at the opening had managed to navigate the world several times over, seconds after Kim and Shego had made their exit. Blurry cell phone footage was posted up on YouTub in equal time. One clip had received over a million hits and was trending strongly. A Facebook page devoted to Kigo had sprouted with tens of thousands of friends. Newspapers nation wide had indicated they were going to run the story in the morning editions.

The executive producer pointed out that Summer was the supposed to be the seasoned professional and yet she was made to look like she a novice. She had nothing to show for her efforts. Did she not grasp the notion of the internet and social media?

In her defense, Summer tried to point out that it wasn't the crew's fault because Ron Stoppable had sabotaged the footage. The executive producer and chief of news countered with why would a hero like Ron, who had saved the world from an alien invasion, would participate in such petty vandalism. Summer has no answers.

The 'debriefing' ended with the chief of news announcing that the station could no longer tolerate such incompetence. He then informed Summer and her crew that as they failed to do their jobs, their services were no longer required, effective immediately. The three of them had thirty minutes to clear out their desks and to get out of the building. Glowing references were not coming their way.

By the time Summer reached her home in Upperton, she was fuming. She wanted to exact revenge on the hick station that had been her employer for many years. Most of all, she wanted Kim Possible and Ron Stoppable to suffer. She was nobody's fool or scapegoat. Summer wanted to know why the pair had acted so out of character and wanted to expose it. But first she needed alcohol and lots of it.

She jumped into a cab and ended up at the only establishment open, the Average Goon Bar. The cab driver was concerned for her safety when they pulled up, but she assured him that the mood she was in, she pitied anyone who tried to cross her.

So far her plan to exact revenge yielded nothing. Maybe after another drink. "Bar keep, another G & T over this way. Pronto," she slurred.

Behind her, Summer could hear the front door open. She turned to her side and saw three large men making their way to the bar. They were the type of men that normally she would ignore. Their faces were meaty and their features asymmetrical. They were the type of men that would use their fists before thinking about their actions. One looked liked he was in desperate need of a dentist. Another has scar along the side of his face. Despite her drunken state and blurred vision, she could see the third man had an incomplete ear. This man definitely looked like he had gone a few rounds with Mike Tyson. He also appeared to have broken his nose one too many times.

The three were dressed identically in red jumpsuits, black harnesses and boots. It seemed to be a uniform of some kind and an unflattering one at that. The uniform seemed very familiar but Summer had great difficulty in placing it. It did not help that all her neurons were not firing as they normally did.

"Nice uniform boys," Summer called out. "Are you boys professional wrestlers?"

"No," replied the man with the broken teeth. "We are more like professional security."

"In those outfits? They're not very inconspicuous. You wouldn't be security for someone important. Or do you work in a theme park?" Summer said in a disparaging manner.

The man's face flashed his annoyance. "They don't need to be inconspicuous. The boss makes us wear them. He likes them fine."

Summer scoffed before adding, "Nice boss. That getup doesn't look very comfortable. It's not very becoming. Don't you worry about camel toes and constant wedgies?"

"We like them fine. Not that its any of your business lady," the man replied dismissing Summer and her personal line of questioning. He turned his attention to the bar tender, "Three beers, please."

The suited men ignored their surroundings and started chatting between themselves, a few feet away from Summer. She watched them with her hooded and drunken gaze, happy to stay in the background. For the moment. She was dying to know why the red uniform was so familiar. Even a drunken journalist was still a journalist.


Kim Possible was still wide awake. She just was too excited to sleep. The events of the evening just replayed themselves over and over in her head. She remembered nothing from her drive home from Upperton. She might as well as floated all the way home. When Kim entered her childhood house she found both her parents were up and watching television.

"How was your night Kimmie-cub?" asked her father from the sofa.

"I had so much fun," replied Kim with a smile. She moved into the living area and sat next to her mother.

"The opening was on the news. Actually that's all the late news showed. It certainly sounded like an eventful shin dig," her father continued.

"It was no big. Right in the middle of Fyne's introduction, Dr Drakken and Shego decided to break in and steal Woman III while no one was looking. Drakken managed to get away with the painting but Shego couldn't and the sitch went from there," said Kim modestly, downplaying the events.

"Kimmie, I'm sure there was more to it than that," piped in Ann Possible. "Remember, I've seen you and Shego do your thing. Your encounters with Shego have been so physical. You regularly came home sporting an injury. I used to worry about you.

"From the little we could see from the news, you and Shego didn't appear to be fighting in anyway. That's unusual for the pair of you, as was seeing the two of you leaving the scene together. So what really happened?"

"Sorry mom. I never meant to worry you," Kim said apologetically. She never wanted to have her parents worry about her. She owed them a better explanation. "Drakken was in the hovercraft with the painting. When Shego trying to get away I grabbed her. I couldn't get a good hold. Her suit broke. Basically she used me as a cover. She agreed to return the painting if I could help her get away without exposing herself."

"Kimmie, why was nothing broadcast? They just said you and Shego exited together."

Kim looked down and mumbled honestly, "Mmmm... Ron helped disabled the cameras."

"Kim, why on earth would Ronald do that?" asked Ann shocked by the revelation. That didn't sound like the young man she knew.

Kim's face became heated. Both parents were now staring at her intently, "Because he knew I'd want him to."

Ann gave Kim a piercing look like she could see right through her daughter. Kim continued, "You know that phobia most people have of being found naked in public? Well Ron has lived it, on many, many occasions. I think the world has seen every pair of boxers Ron has ever owned. I have experienced it too. Not to the same extent obviously."

Kim paused thinking of the best way to proceed. She needed her parents to understand. "Shego might be a little evil but she's not a bad person deep down. Remember when she stayed with us? She was actually quite sweet. She's never really wanted to hurt me, mom. She's saved me more than once in the past. Ron knows that. Whatever she's done, she didn't deserve to be publicly humiliated in that way."

"OK, what did you do after you left the gallery?" asked Ann.

"I drove Shego back to the lair and we talked for a little bit," Kim said feeling her ears heating up. She wasn't ready to share with her parents how she felt about Shego. Her mother was watching her closely.

"How did you leave it with Shego?" Ann asked gently.

"Shego promised to call me tomorrow so we could meet up and return the artwork together," said Kim more confidently, feeling she was on stronger ground.

"Kimmie-cub, if I remember correctly, Shego was one of those circus folk. I'm not sure I can trust circus folk. How can you be sure you can trust her?" asked James Possible.

"I know she will call. Shego is a woman of her word," Kim said confidently.

Ann Possible touched Kim's thigh. "Well Kimmie it sounds like you had an eventful time. Why don't you have some warm milk, run a bath and try to unwind?"

"Thanks mom, I might do that. I love you," said Kim moving across to kiss her both parents on the cheek.

As she walked towards the kitchen, Ann called out to her daughter, "Kimmie, you looked beautiful tonight. I hope others could truly appreciate how much you've matured."

Kim's blush returned with even greater intensity, "Thanks mom. Goodnight."


"Night, Kimmie-cub."

Kim lay in bed thinking about her mother's odd comment. She didn't know what it meant. Did her mom know that she wasn't being forthcoming about what happened at the lair? She hoped she was not reading too much into it.

Her mind wandered to Shego. Kim had seen a side of the green woman she never thought possible, literally. Who would have thought Shego would have such great boobs? Kim only saw glimpses of them, mostly out of the corners of her eyes, but she liked what she saw. The entire time Shego had held Kim 'hostage', Kim was aware of the green woman's ample bosom and erect nipples against her back. And the way Shego had held her... It was quite intimate. It was divine. Kim loved the way her body melded against Shego's. Not once did the hero feel threatened by her nemesis. She in fact loved every second.

Who would have thought the most wanted woman on the planet would be that self-conscious? Kim didn't know why. She thought Shego was absolutely gorgeous. She had always thought that. Initially, Kim felt unsettled by Shego's green tones but now the fallen hero's coloring did not bother her. In fact, it was Shego's expressive face and intense green eyes that caught her interest.

The red head loved the way Shego moved. It was criminal how the green woman moved her hips. She was a woman who knew how to use her body and was aware of it at all times. How Kim wanted to get the villainess on the dance floor. If said villainess could just speak sweet nothings into her ear with that sexy husky voice... it would be heaven!

And then there was that kiss. It was something Kim had wanted to do for very long time but never had the opportunity. When she used to fantasize about it, she imagined pushing Shego against a wall and kissing her forcefully. It was an extension of their fighting. She never imagined that locking lips with Shego could be that gentle. It felt so right to Kim. And she wanted to do it again. And again. She wanted to experience more of it and on her terms, away from work, away from the public. Just the two of them.

For all the villainess' tough and sarcastic exterior there was a soft gooey centre. Kim wanted a bite. Hopefully tomorrow, would be the day, thought the tired red head, her last thought just before she fell into a gentle sleep.


Summer Gale sat at the bar listening intensely to the three men. She was still trying to place them.

"Bob, this was an inspired idea," said the man with the incomplete ear to the man in desperate need of a dentist.

"Becker, who says inspired? Seriously! You swallow a dictionary?" replied Bob.

"No, if you must know, I've been trying to do the Times crossword," said Becker. Laughter filled the bar.

"Seriously Bob, great move getting us out. It was getting way too uncomfortable in there," the third man said.

"God, I thought she was going to kill him. I haven't heard her that mad in years," said Becker.

"I know. Did you see the boss man's face when she got home and started yelling at him?" Bob asked.

"No, I missed that. Did he look like he was going to poop his pants?" asked Becker.

"Pretty much. I haven't seen the boss man move so fast. He locked himself into his room. She was demanding he open up and take it like a man. She was threatening to kill him," continued Bob.

"Did any of you guys happen to see what she was wearing?" the third man asked.

"No," both men replied simultaneously.

"Man, you guys missed out. Hot I tell you!" the third man said teasing his friends.

"Stevens, you bastard, you can't just leave it at that. What was she wearing?" asked Bob.

"Guys, it was what she wasn't wearing. Lady boss was busting out of her suit. The green babe has got a great pair. I pretended I wasn't watching just in case she blasted me," said Stevens.

"Oh not fair!"

"Where was I?"

"On the toilet Becker, where else?" said Stevens.

Summer's ears pricked up. Despite the alcohol clouding her brain she now knew who the three men were just from the snippets of conversation she had just heard. Summer also knew that she had been handed an opportunity to salvage her career. Now to close the deal.

"Fellas," she called out across the bar, "We seemed to have gotten off to a bad start. Let me buy you all a beer. I want to make you an offer that you can't refuse.

"Bar keep, another round for these fine gentlemen here, and another G & T for me." It was show time.