Author: Tori Sakana

Summary: As usual, the boys can't go anywhere without getting into trouble. The stakes are high and time is running out, and weapons won't do any good. Even when you can't afford to lose, how do you win against something you can't even fight?

Warnings: bad language (Bad monk!), angst (in later parts)

Time frame: doesn't fit anywhere particular in the storyline.

Disclaimer: I don't own Gensomaden Saiyuki or any of its characters or plot or anything.

"blah" = words

blah = thoughts

Now, on to the fic!




Four men walk into a bar.

Beer...sweet beer... The redhead is practically drooling.

This certainly looks like a cozy inn. smiles the brunette.

..... thinks the gold-eyed kid.

One more word out of them, and they're dead meat. growls the blond.

The Sanzo party has arrived.

Sanzo and Hakkai claim a table in the corner and two bottles of red wine.

"Hey, Sanzo, I'm hungry!" whines Goku.

"Shut up, stupid ape, you just ate an hour ago!"

"Don't call me that, you perverted kappa! And I'm hungry again!"



"SHUT UP!" The Paper Fan appears out of nowhere...

"Damn it," mutters Gojyo. "Stuck in a corner with this idiot."

He glares across the room at Sanzo and Hakkai. They had banished Gojyo and Goku to a tiny table in the corner of the room, and threatened the pair with immediate dismemberment if they made one more obnoxious sound. Gojyo had grumbled, but since he had claimed possession of one of the bottles of wine he wasn't that unhappy.

Still, he was stuck with the kid...

"Hey, Gojyo, I'm hungry!" whines Goku.

"I thought I told you to shut up."


"Shut it, dumbass ape! The waiter took our order, our food'll be out soon! Can't you wait thirty seconds for food, animal?" Gojyo growls.

Goku pouts but shuts up, his wide gold eyes scanning the room for something interesting to look at.

Gojyo sighs. It's gonna be a long dinner. He stares absentmindedly at the wine bottle when suddenly an idea strikes.

"Oi, ape!"

"Don't call me ape!"

"Would you prefer stupid ape?"

"Shut up, pervert kappa!"

"You shut up, dumbass. I've got an idea."

Goku stares at him quizzically while Gojyo's grin widens.

"I'm gonna introduce you to a little friend of mine called alcohol."

(A/N: All right, hands up all those who think getting Goku drunk is a very bad idea. I thought so - TS)

"Al-co-hol?" Goku wonders aloud.

"Yeah, beer, wine, liquor? Damn, you really do know nothing, ape."

"Shut up! Anyway Gojyo, I thought I was too young to drink."

"Naw, 's all right. After all, you're like 500 years old, right?"

"But Gojyo..."


"I'm hungry!"

Across the room, Hakkai watches worriedly.

"Sanzo, are you sure this is a good idea?"

The worldly monk shrugs. "Why not."

"But Goku..."

"Isn't a child. Leave them alone."


Hakkai watches Gojyo pour the drinks, filling Goku's cup almost to the brim with wine almost as red as his hair.

Suddenly, he sits up.

"Sanzo, that smell..."

"Youki. And it isn't yours."

"Where's it coming from?"

"I don't know. It's old, a few days at least."

"Perhaps we should warn Gojyo and Goku."

Gojyo deposits the glass in front of his younger companion with a flourish.

"The drink of the gods! You better appreciate this, ape, I was looking forward to that whole bottle."

Goku picks up the red liquid suspiciously. He sniffs. "Smells funny."

"That's the alcohol, moron. Drink it."

Eyeing Gojyo warily, Goku takes a tiny sip. "It's delicious!" He downs the rest of the glass in one gulp.

Gojyo's eyes are saucers. How'd he drink all that wine at once? He's never had it before... The ape must have a head for alcohol to rival his own.

"Oi, Gojyo!" Hakkai calls from the other table.

"Wha?" Gojyo growls.

"Come here, please!"

"Oh, all right." Make up your minds!

Gojyo picks up his glass and takes it over to Sanzo and Hakkai's table. Goku greedily grabs the bottle and refills his cup, downing it again in one gulp.

Gojyo just shakes his head in admiration. I hope he leaves some for me, the stupid ape.

"Gojyo, do you smell anything?"

Suddenly he notices the lingering aura. "Youki. Is it dangerous?"

"Most likely," answers Sanzo.

"So just be careful," warns Hakkai.

"I will. We won't relax too much." Gojyo winks at Hakkai. "But at least the wine is good."

He gestures to his own table, where Goku is now down to the bottom quarter of the bottle.

Hakkai chuckles appreciatively. "I pity the headache Goku's going to have in the morning."

Sanzo just grunts as the ape finishes off the last of the bottle and sits back, the red flush of alcohol on his cheeks.

Damn ape! He did drink it all! Gojyo curses silently. Oh well, I'll just borrow Sanzo's since he seems to have forgiven me for now...

As he raises the glass to his lips, it suddenly shatters in pieces, spraying the wine over the table. At almost the same time, Hakkai and Sanzo's glasses as well as their nearly full bottle also explode.

"What the--"


The boy stands in front of their table with his Nyoibo extended. Red wine drips off the end of the weapon.

"What'd you do that for? Dumbass ape!!" Gojyo shouts in anger.

"Don't drink the wine," Goku gasps out. Gojyo suddenly notices that the boy is flushed and sweating, and panting like he's just run a marathon.

What the hell? That doesn't seem right, even for the amount he drank... Gojyo's eyes flick back to the empty bottle on the other table, estimating how much had been in there.

A silence falls over the table as the tension rises.

"Why not?" asks Sanzo with an edge in his voice.

Gold eyes meet violet steadily as Goku answers.

"It's poisoned."


A/N: Mean cliffhanger, ne? Muwahahaha! Don't worry this fic will most definitely be finished. I'm gonna update every day or two, I promise…I know this chapter was short, but it's better to be short and frequent than long and far between!

So, did you like it? Or hate it? Or what? Please review! Pretty please?

Thanks a bunch to my beta, ReySolo (go read her fics). Yay Rey-chan!

Random other notes: I didn't use the normal Japanese insults like baka or saru, as you probably noticed. I did this for two reasons. One is that not every reader speaks Japanese, even for little phrases. Two is I would probably assume the rest of you speak more than you do, and end up confusing you guys. To avoid using too much, I opted for too little. Gomen nasai!

Japanese words I did use:

Youki = demonic or evil aura

That's about it for R/R, please!