Dr Magnusson's Casserole alternative version

Believe it or not, in Half Life, Gordon can actually choose not to wreck Dr Magnusson's casserole in the break room. But even so the casserole still gets wrecked after Gordon causes the alien accident in the test chamber, so Magnusson could still be referring to that. So I present to you a humourous alternative version of how Magnusson gets his casserole wrecked. Gordon does talk in this parody, but at least not much. We'll mostly hear his thoughts.

On the day of the Black Mesa Incident, Gordon walked into the break room to find Dr Magnusson sitting down waiting for his casserole.

"Ohhhh...that food looks delicious." Gordon said to Magnusson.

"Get away from that microwave, Freeman!" Magnusson snapped at Gordon.

"But Magnusson that temperature you're cooking at looks a little low. Maybe I should turn it up..."

"You touch that microwave and I will pull off your legs!" Magnusson snarled. "I will not have my breakfast ruined!"

"Alright, you don't need to lose your temper over a casserole."

Magnusson walked over to the microwave to prevent Freeman from touching it. "And besides weren't you supposed to be in the test chamber half an hour ago?"

"Alright I'm going." Gordon frowned. He then said in a quiet voice. "I'll leave you alone so you can make love to your precious casserole."

"What was that!" Magnusson snarled.

"Nothing." Gordon replied nervously. "Sheesh" he thought to himself. "Must be one hell of a good casserole if he treats it like one of his own children. I'd hate to know what would have happened if somebody really did wreck it. He'd probably have a ridiculously stupid long hatred of that person forever."

While Gordon was putting on his HEV suit and going to the test chamber. Magnusson still watched his casserole.

"Hmmmm...only needs a few more minutes." He thought.

Then the alien accident happened. Equipment exploded all over Black Mesa.

"What the hell's going on!" Magnusson thought. "What is Freeman doing in that test chamber!"

Suddenley the microwave exploded wrecking Dr Magnusson's casserole in the process. Dr Magnusson was really angry now. He looked up at the ceiling and raised his arms with his hands clutched into fists.

"GODDAMN YOU, FREEMAN!" he shouted completely ignoring that aliens were killing scientists around him.

5 minutes later

After the disaster, Gordon walked into the break room

"Any survivors in here?" Gordon thought. Gordon then turned to see the destroyed casserole.

"Oh shit!" he thought "Magnusson's gonna be pissed off with me!" Then he smiled "Nahhhhh...he'll never survive. Plus I doubt we'll ever meet again after this..."

20 years later in Half Life 2 episode 2...

"Oh and Freeman if you pull this off...I might just forgive you for that debacle at Black Mesa."

"What?" Freeman thought getting nervous.

"You know the one I mean" "Magnusson continued "Involving a certain microwave casserole."

"Damn!" Freeman thought "For an old guy he's got a good memory!"


Here's a pop quiz for all you Adrian Shephard fans.

When you make Gordon Freeman talk in fan-made material, such as fan-fiction, fan movies people get upset. but when Adrian Shephard (The star of Half Life opposing Force) talks in fan-made material...no one cares.

Why do people get upset at seeing Gordon talk, but no one cares if Adrian talks?