Fate is not an eagle, it creeps like a rat.
Elizabeth Bowen

"Rose…are you okay?" He asked obviously uncomfortable with his current situation.

My eyes trembled with tears that threatened to spill from my eyes, but I wouldn't let them. I refused to let them fall. I wouldn't let this cowardly bastard see me cry. So I swallowed them back and forced a smile on my face. It was shaky at best, but it was better than nothing.

"Yep," I grinned so hard my teeth hurt. "I'm great."

It took every nerve in my body not to slap him across the face. Instead I steered myself away from him and left the room. In the back of mind I had to remind myself that only a six months ago I was happy.

When I Was Happy

I was on the Hogwarts Express heading back home for summer break. My cousin Albus was unconscious on the floor, my other cousin Lily was playing wizard's chess with my brother, Hugo and I was lying against my boyfriend Aiden's chest. I had everything I wanted. I was in love with my boyfriend of a year, I had great friends, a wonderful family and I was finished with my sixth year of Hogwarts. See I should have seen that everything was going too well right then and there, but of course I didn't. Because when you're that happy you're too scared to question it.

"What days are you going to be gone for again?" Aiden whined down at me miserably as he held my face.

I grinned up at him. "25th through the 7th of July."

"So you absolutely won't make it to Hilarie's summer house?"

"No," I frowned sadly, "You know how my family is with the family trips."

He sighed, "Yeah I know. I just wish they didn't make it last so long…I wanted to snog you on the beach…under the stars."

"Well you can kiss me now."

"On behalf of everyone conscious in the compartment, ew." Lily snapped at us without looking up from the chest game.

I snickered at her. "So sorry Lily for upsetting your delicate sensibility."

"I take your apologizes into consideration."

The train came to a halt and I was forced to let go of Aiden. He wasn't so willing to let go of me though. Lily made a noise of disgust and she dragged Albus and Hugo off the train. I stayed behind with him. His brown eyes were set lazily on me as his tan arms wrapped around the back of my waist.

"I love you," He told me with a smile as he gently pushed my bangs off my face.

I grinned up at him, "I love you too."

His hands slipped down below my waist and he grinned mischievously. "Well I was thinking…when we get back from break we could…."

"Well we'll see won't we?" I wagged my eyebrows at him suggestively.

For a second we just stood there starring at each other. I loved him, he loved me and that was it. I didn't want to not see him for two months. The problem was even if I didn't do anything after my family vacation he was leaving that day for America. I was proud of him for getting an internship over there for the summer, but I was going to miss him like hell.

"ROSE!" Lily yelled from outside the compartment. "Move your fat ass!"

I sighed, grabbed my luggage. "Well write me okay?"

"I promise." He murmured before kissing me one last time.

3 Months Ago …

And he did write me. Everyday for the first two months of summer we wrote to each other. No matter what I was doing I always put some time aside to talk to him. He told me about how fun and interesting America was and how he couldn't wait to bring me there. I told him about my adventures with Lily, Albus and Hugo and how much I loved working at Flourish and Plots. The only thing I thought about the week before school started was getting back to him, getting back to us. Then I got the owl that changed everything.

"MUM!" I screamed, sprinting out of my room, bolting down the stairs and abruptly stopping in front of her. "I GOT IT!"

My mother looked up at me from her paperwork. "What?" Then her eyes caught the letter in my hand and she lost it. "RON! SHE GOT IT!"

Hermione Weasley and Rose Weasley became one as we both shrieked with delight, jumping up and down together like freaks. My father came in the room looked slightly afraid of us. My mother and I were always more similar when it came to academics and he often felt out of the loop.

"Er…what's going on?"

"DADDY!" I threw my arms around him in a tight hug, "I GOT HEAD GIRL!"

"You did?" He yelled back at me.

I showed him the letter and the three of us joined in this group ecstatic family huddle. The only thing missing was my idiot brother.

"Where's Hugo?"

My father released me from his grip and frowned in thought. "I think he's over James's new flat."

"Well I'm going over to tell them!" I rushed away but then doubled back to throw them into a bone-crushing hug. "I'M SO HAPPY!"

"We couldn't tell," My dad snickered sarcastically.

I then fled to the living room. Grabbing a handful of floo powder, I tossed it carelessly into the fire and jumped inside. I whirled around in the fire until James's small flat came to my view. Hugo was sitting on the only piece of furniture in the room and James was leaning against the wall discussing Quidditch.

"Guys! I have some news!" I told them excitedly, "I got Head Girl."

They both laughed, but it was James who spoke first. "Am we supposed to be surprised?"

My eyes narrowed. "I'm happy here and it would be phenomenal if you two would join the team instead of bashing it."

"Congratulations sis." Hugo smiled lazily, wrapping me in a loose hug.

James ruffled my hair affectionately. "Yeah good job nerd."

A week later, I was on the train heading back to Hogwarts. I hadn't seen my boyfriend in two months. When I saw him at the train station I ran into his arms and in a grand gesture he hugged me and spun me around like I'd always imagined a boy someday would. Then, he put me down and kissed me, one of those sweet pre-teen kisses that are so pure and full of a magic we lose in our later years. I grinned against his lips and I pulled away.

Of course every relationships has early signs of deterioration, but in that second, I had no idea that my perfect relationship was about to have one. Aiden looked at me, smiled but that smile faded when he saw the bright Gryffindor colored badge on my chest.

"What's that?" He asked, his voice slightly off.

"I wanted to wait to tell you…I'm Head Girl!"

And out of everyone that I'd told, he was the only one that looked like they had to force themselves to be…happy. Aiden looked like he was fighting his feelings to look anything, but depressed, which killed me. I tried not to let my disappointment show but it was hard. The one person I thought would be happy for me was him. Wasn't that the point of boyfriends? To support you and believe in you? Even James was and he was the king of detention when he went to Hogwarts.

"What?" I asked in a quiet voice. "Is there something wrong?"

"No," He frowned, "I'm sorry…I just was really hoping for Head Boy. I'm sorry…I am happy for you."

He didn't look it, but I just smiled anyway and tried to be nice. "Well thank you and I'm sorry I didn't realize you were trying out for it."

"Yeah, well, I should have known it was a long shot."

"No…" I started desperately trying to think of another topic.

He acted as if the whole thing didn't bother him and gave me a fake smile. "Who is Head Boy anyway?"

"No idea." I replied honestly. "I didn't look."

For some reason that made him look angrier. I couldn't have thought of a reason why, but a few minutes later I went to the Head's compartment and he went off to sit with his friends. As I walked into the room I wanted to feel the way I had the whole week. The euphoric happiness of having gone out with a dream and succeeding in attaining it had radiated at me, but now that glow was gone. Ever since I was named prefect I dreamed about being able to put Head Girl on my resume. I worked hard as a prefect and as a student to make sure that I have a chance to get this position. And when I got it he had to go and ruin it.

But I pushed it aside and sat down looking out the window, hoping that it was just a stumbled in our otherwise great relationship. Ten minutes later I met the Head Boy, Malfoy. As if matters couldn't get any worse…. Sadly a month later it did.

2 Months Ago….

For five hours, I had been in the library finishing my homework when Malfoy sauntered over to my table. Over the duration of the month, we'd learned to keep our dislike to bare minimum since we had to work together so often and didn't have the time for our usual petty squabbling. But there were times where it still pushed my patience to ignore his condescending tone and snide comments.

"Weasley," He began curtly, "Did you finish the prefect spreadsheets for next week?"

I groaned, "No. I'll get them to you tomorrow during our free period."

"Fine, but do it before Potions so I can post them before dinner." Malfoy snapped swiftly before walking away.

Mockingly, I saluted his retreating form and sulked. It had become almost impossible to go to class, hang out with my friends, go to Quidditch, see my boyfriend and get all my homework done, but I was doing my best.

Sighing to myself, I tucked my transfiguration essay away and got up to leave for the night. It wasn't due till Thursday so I had a few days to add the finishing touches. I was supposed to meet Aiden for a desperately needed snog session. But when I reached the second floor landing he was nowhere to be found. For twenty minutes, I stood there waiting for him and he never showed up. Furious I went back to my room and started the prefect schedule. An hour into it he sent me a letter apologizing for his absence and blaming it his overload of school work. I didn't respond to his letter even when his owl tried to bite me. This wasn't the first time this month I'd 'slipped'his mind, but I wasn't going to let this one go. We were reaching our two-year anniversary and so far he hadn't said anything about it. Every other anniversary I didn't expect much because… well he had the tendency to mess them up. This was a big anniversary though and I hated to think he was just going to get me flowers and a kiss goodnight.

A week later the big date had come. I got all dressed up in this adorable blue dress I'd picked out a week before with Lily. Aiden took my hand and led me to Hogsmede. Once we were there he took me to this cute little restaurant off the side of the main road. The whole time never let go of my hand or stopped telling me how beautiful I looked. Then he handed me a bouquet of roses, which aren't my favorite flower, but it didn't matter, all that matter was he was making an effort. After dinner he took me back to castle and blindfolded me. I was nervous, but when I opened my eyes my eyes watered with happiness. He set up the room requirement with candles and rose pedals were everywhere. It was the sweetest thing he'd ever done for me.

1 Month Ago….

"Rose you okay?" Hugo asked me offhandedly as he passed me in the hallway.

I nodded and gave him a distant smile. "Yeah I'm good. I'll see you at lunch."

When he left, I slid into the back of Charms classroom. Kelly and Lauren were already in their seats but they had clearly left the window seat open for me. I gave them both a smile and climbed into the seat beside them. Lauren was busy doodling on the side of her paper, her dark blonde hair, falling carelessly into her face. Kelly on the other hand was starring at me from the other side of Lauren. Her tiny little face peered at me curiously, as her long black hair spilled onto the table.

"What's up? You look upset."

I frowned. Why couldn't I have less observant people around me? "No I'm fine. Just have a lot on my mind."

"You sure?" She asked.


"Is it about Aiden?" Lauren questioned lightly, her eyes concentrating on the smurf she was sketching.

I blinked at them. Was I really that obvious? "Not really."

"Rose," Lauren sighed giving me a scathing look. "You really are a horrible liar. Always have been really."

"No I'm not and I'm not lying!" I insisted.

Kelly shrugged. "Oh-kay well it just seems like you two are really distant."

"I just…after our anniversary I was really excited-"

"Because he actually acted like he gave a shit." Lauren interjected wisely.

I glared at her, but continued. "Yes, but instead of putting more effort into our relationship he just insists it will be better once we get to next semester. Like saying it will be better will make it better."

Kelly raised her eyebrows, "Plus I don't see how next semester will make it better. We will get twice as much homework with N.E.W.T's coming up. And isn't he trying to get into the American Ministry?"

"Yeah," I frowned, "He is."

"Well considering you are trying to get into our Ministry to be honest I don't see how that's going to work." Lauren told me bluntly.

Kelly nudged her side roughly before turning to me. "Well have you talked about it?"

"We barely see each other as it is and we're usually fighting …or more I'm yelling at him and he just stands there and takes it."

They shared a look, but they didn't get a chance to say what they were thinking because stout little Professor Marrow came in.

As she talked I, for once, didn't listen. I starred out the window and thought about my relationship. Yes we were going through a rough patch, but we loved each other and that should be enough to get us through it. It wasn't.

Ten Days Ago….

"I think I'm going to break up with Aiden," I told Kelly softly as I laid back on her bed.

She paused in the midst of packing and glanced over at me sympathetically. "You sure?"

"Yeah…it's not going anywhere. We hardly talk anymore. I don't know how I'm going to do it though...I still love him."

"Well tell him that. Explain that it's just not working out and you don't want to end on a bad note." Kelly advised me kindly.

I snorted with laughter. "If it were his choice he would run the relationship into the ground rather than break up."

"Well he's not the type to break up with someone."

I let out a heavy breath and starred up at her ceiling. "I know. He's too nice."

"That's not what I'd call it." Lauren scoffed as she entered the room looking quite cross. "Kelly your friend Chelsea needs to check her attitude. Just because I'm a Gryffindor doesn't mean it's illegal to enter the Ravenclaw dormitory."

Kelly snickered at that. "What did you say to her?"

"Only that if she didn't get out of my way I'd find another place for my broomstick."

I shook my head at her, unable to hold back my laughter. "Lauren. You need to learn to control your temper."

"You should talk red. I saw you having a few choice words with Malfoy last week. You looked like you wanted to behead him."

"Believe me the thought has occurred to me, but I've tried my very best to pretend that his very essence doesn't insult me."

"Well mate," Lauren began before sitting next to me. "You're going to have to try just a bit harder."

I glanced down at my watch. "I should go."

"Well good luck." Kelly said as she continued throwing sweaters into her luggage.

I didn't want to do this, but I knew it was the right thing to do. I wasn't happy and no matter what we did nothing seemed to change that. Aiden was waiting for me by the great hall. Of course the day I decide to break up with him he's on time.

"So I wanted to talk to you." I told him carefully.

"What about?" He asked stiffly.

How could I say it? I've never broken up with someone before. When I looked into his deep brown eyes I crumbled. How could I tell him I no longer wanted to be with him? My resolve strengthened as I looked away from him. I knew it wouldn't be easy but I had to stick to my guns. If I didn't want this I wouldn't have let it get this far.

"I don't think I can do this anymore…" I whispered, my voice braver than I felt.

His expression changed drastically as his eyes filled up with tears. "What?"

"We've been unhappy for months and this can't ever work out…You're going to America as soon as the school year ends and I'm staying here."

"So …you don't love me." Aiden questioned, his voice was weak.

"No, I do love you-"

"Then why do we have to break up? We can work it out!" He insisted.

I pulled away from him as he reached for me. "No…we can't. I'm sorry. I love you. I do. And I don't want anyone else but I just can't keep living like this. I'm sorry."

"Rose," His voice was heartbroken but I didn't look up.

"When we get over each other I want to be friends." I told him, my face full of tears and then before I could take it back, I ran.

Five Hours Ago…

"Rose honey you have to get up." My mother said as she sat on my bed.

I didn't even move. "Why?"

"Kelly and Lauren are here. They came to get you for your New Year's party."

"I'm not going." I told her flatly.

I knew she was concerned, but I didn't care. In five days, I'd go back to school and have to pretend to be okay but right then I didn't want to have to force the effort. The first night after I broke up with Aiden I'd spent the whole night packing for Christmas break and crying. After that I felt like I had no more tears left in me. I didn't see Aiden and I didn't go looking for him either. Over the holidays my family tried desperately to cheer me up but I was immune. I didn't want to be happy. All I could think about was how devastated he was. My intention wasn't to hurt him. I was doing the rational and reasonable thing. Would he hate me for that? Was he ever going to get over it? My mind wasn't on my own pain; I deserved to feel this miserable. I did this to myself. I was more concerned about him.

"Sweetheart I think it will be good for you to get out. If you go I swear you don't have to leave this room till you go back to school." She offered knowingly.

Numbly I crawled out of my bundle of blankets and climbed out of bed. "Fine. I'll go."

"Oh good. I'll send them up."

"I'm only staying for an hour." I told her before she shut the door.

Kelly walked in first but wasn't as quick as Lauren to hide her expression at the sight of me. Lauren was dressed in a cute white dress with black trimming at the bottom that showed off her nice long legs. Whereas, Kelly was in an over the shoulder olive dress that accented her cute little figure. It was clear that my days of snuggling with my comforter for support had lessened my looks but it didn't take them that long to make me pretty.

"I'll go for an hour to make an appearance then I'm coming back." I declared firmly as they forced me into a yellow dress from my closet.

An hour later, I trailed behind Lauren and Kelly stiffly. My watch was already set so the minute my watch hit eleven I would leave. They had other ideas. Every time I would try and sneak off to get my coat one of them would suddenly pop out of nowhere and engage me in a conversation. This was the party of the year and there was no way they would intentionally let me bail out of it. Unfortunately for them, once Kelly's wannabe boyfriend, Ian McLaggen, arrived Lauren didn't notice me squeeze through the oversized crowd to the living room. I seized my opportunity quickly and went straight for the coatroom. But I didn't make it.

There were about sixty people wandering around this party, but my eyes were caught on Aiden and Claire Farns. Who were sitting on one of the couch's holding hands and smiling at each other. My heart felt like someone took a battle-axe and swung at it until it was ripped completely a part. I'd spent the whole week miserable. I'd spent the whole week thinking about what I'd done to him! And where is he? Holding hands with Claire! Slutty, needy Claire! He didn't even have the decency to just snog her. No he was actually talking to her in between their first tentative kisses like she meant something to him!

Raw with hurt, I shifted in an effort to move away, but the moment I took a step in the opposite direction he looked up. For a split second I thought he might ignore me but he didn't. He said something to her and then came towards me. I couldn't move, my feet were routed in the spot. My mind wanted him to give me a reason why he wasn't as upset as I was but my heart broke over and over again at just the sight of him.

"Rose," He scratched his neck clumsily, "I'm sorry…I just…I miss you and I realized you're right. There's no way this is going to work out."

"So instead of grieving the loss of our relationship you jump into the nearest female's arms?"

He had the audacity to look offended. "You broke up with me Rose. Not the other way around."

"Yeah," I laughed hollowly, "Because we weren't happy. Not because I stopped loving you or wanted anybody else."


I crossed my arms as my lips thinned in anger. "Well what? If I had a choice to be alone or with someone else I'd choose to be alone!"

"I'm not like you Rose. You're strong. I'm not. I can't be alone. It hurts too much." His voice sounded so distraught but I knew better.

"Well Aiden," My voice was cutting, "That's pathetic. Instead of grieving our two year relationship and acting as if I meant anything to you. You throw yourself into something else so you don't have to feel bad?... Have fun with your little friend."

He grabbed my arm. His face was looked so horribly torn. "Rose… come on."

"Don't touch me." I snarled at him hatefully.

"I should tell you… before it gets out." He started sheepishly, "Clare isn't just some girl. She's my girlfriend."

My jaw tightened as my fists balled up.

"Rose…are you okay?" He asked obviously uncomfortable with his current situation.

My eyes trembled with tears that threatened to spill from my eyes, but I wouldn't let them. I refused to let them fall. I wouldn't let this cowardly bastard see me cry. So I swallowed them back and forced a smile on my face. It was shaky at best, but it was better than nothing.

"Yep," I grinned so hard my teeth hurt. "I'm great."

It took every nerve in my body not to slap him across the face. Instead I steered myself away from him and left the room. In the back of mind I had to remind myself that only a six months ago I was happy. Stupid me! How could I have thought that he meant any of those things he said to me? All those letters proclaiming that I was the only one for him and that he wouldn't know what to do without me... what bullocks. Yeah, I'm special all right. I'm so special that it took him a week to get someone in to replace me.

Grabbing my coat, I apparated home and sat outside for a few minutes. No longer would I grieve over the relationship we had. It was clear that no matter how much it meant to me it wasn't worth crying over.