Author Note: One of three short stories I wrote to get a handle on River and Jayne before I wrote Acceptable.

Jayne And River Discuss Jiggling

"They jiggle."


Jayne's eyes slide off the huge tits of a woman sitting on the porch of the whorehouse across the street to settle on River's face. She's frowning, which don't bode well. (River that is, not the whore, although any woman frowning never bodes well.)

"They jiggle. Get in the way. No use for fighting and not practical."

Jayne snorts.

"I like that one better." She points. "Talented tongue."

"An' you know that how?"

River gives him 'the boob look'.

Jayne gets the boob look a lot. He's proud to say he doesn't get it as often as Simon or Mal though.

"Not meant to be readin' folks like that," he tells her, shifting his weight from one foot to the other. "Ain't right."

"Lots of things folks meant not to do, but they do." She glares at him. "You were looking."

"Yeah, at the bits on display." Jayne scratches his ear and says, "Look, if folks don't mind you lookin' at somethin' they put it on display or they tell you to go ahead and be all eyes. If folks wanted their brains lookin' at they'd go to a psycho-what'sit-"

"Psychotherapist. Psychologist. Psychoanalyst."

"Right. A brain person."

River tilts her head to one side.

"What if they're thinking really, really loud?"

"Well," says Jayne, letting his eyes wonder back across the street, "sometimes you can't help lookin' but that don't mean you show it or do anythin' about it."

River giggles and it's Jayne's turn to frown.

"Now what?"

"Jayne is talking about being polite."

"Shut up."