I tossed and turned in my sleep. It had been about a month since L's death and for odd reasons these dreams, or rather memories of the times I spent with L were keeping me from getting the sleep I required. I sat up in bed once again; this was the fifth time tonight I had been awakened by these dreams. A part of me argued that L was gone and that these dreams meant nothing, but there was a part of me that mourned the death of the dark haired detective. I stood up and walked towards the door, I opened it and as soon as I stepped out into the hall I fell against the wall and could no longer hold myself together. The innocence that was Light Yagami broke down into tears over what I had lost, however I could feel the angry and murderous side that was Kira mentally hitting me for showing these emotions. After letting myself cry for a few moments I was about to stand when someone walked into the hall.
"Light?" she said
"Oh Sayu" I said keeping my voice steady "what are you doing up?"
"I heard crying" she said "was that you?"
I turned away from her gaze and slowly nodded my head. I waited a bit and then heard her walk over and sit beside me.
"Light" she said "tell me what's wrong"
"My closest friend" I said "he died"
I could hear her gasp, and that didn't help with me trying to keep calm about the whole situation. She threw her arms around me and pulled me into a hug only a sibling could offer. I got the want or need to cry again, and despite hearing Kira in my head telling me to shut up and go back to bed, I put my arms around her too and began to cry again. It was nice having someone comfort me at this time. I knew the real reason I was so depressed about what happened was because I knew that it was my fault it had happened, I caused the death of my only real friend. After a bit I pulled out of the hug and bided Saiu goodnight and went back to my room. Ryuk was standing near the window as I walked in, he was laughing like he usually did. I could feel Kira scolding me for what had happened as I walked over and looked out the window. Then I turned to the desk drawer where I hid the Death Note, it only took a moment to open the drawer and then pull open the secret compartment. I could feel Kira screaming at me as the drawer and soon the whole desk burst into flames. I stumbled backwards and watched the fire eat everything. Soon I could hear my family waking up; I turned and saw my dad open the door. I quickly grabbed a flaming drawer and tossed it towards the door. My parents jumped back and watched as I stood ready to accept my fate.
"Light stop this!" Sayu yelled
"Im sorry Sayu" I said "but I can't"
My dad tried to get through the flames but as he did I would throw more and more flaming materials towards him.
"Dad this is how it ends for me" I said
"But why?" he asked
"Because I, Kira, killed L" I said
I watched my fathers face fill with horror as he realized what I was saying. Sayu seemed to understand what was going on; she grabbed my father by the arm and started to pull him out of the building with my mother close behind. I looked at the flames that were so close to me they were burning my skin. I knew there was nowhere for me to go, even after death I would just go to nothingness. But still I prayed for some kind of retribution, something that would let me feel at peace with everything. I tired hard not to scream as I felt the fire badly burn my back. I could see from the window of my room that my family was safe outside and our neighbors were also outside watching this home burn. I had considered just asking Ryuk to end my life by writing my name in his Death Note, but I knew that was the easy way out. I had to feel all the pain, all of it. For what I had done to my closest and only friend was too much to take with me, I felt as though by feeling this pain that maybe I could keep from feeling the blame of causing his death. I could still hear my sister call out to me.
"I Know He'll Forgive You" Sayu called
That was it that was all I needed to hear now. I felt as though my conscious split into two, as I looked at my now dead body. I looked up and saw another part of me, the part that was killer, the part that was Kira. I backed away and then fell to the ground as I watched him burn into nothing, I closed my eyes and waited for the same payment. Instead I saw a bright light and then my favorite black haired detective was standing before me. He had his finger to his mouth, as he always did, and then he extended his hand to me.
"I don't deserve what you have" I said with pain in my voice
"Maybe Kira didn't" L said "But Light Yagami deserves only the best"
I took his offered hand and he pulled me to my feet. We were now standing outside a totally burned building.
"I will take you anywhere you wish to go" L said
"As long as it's both of us" I said
The two of us walked into a bright light and we were gone but at least we were together, finally and forever.