I have believed many things in my life. I have believed that there were other life forms out there in space. I have believed that not every soul passed over to the other side of Heaven's door. I have believed that hope was a waste of precious time and there was nothing out there greater than what we already have, I have believed in m all things unnatural, and that a tsunami could form over a dry and heated dessert. I have believed in the impossible, that pigs could actually fly. However, I have not led myself to believe in happy conclusions. Why would I? What in my life could harbor me to believe in such things? I had received a goldfish on my 4th birthday…obviously; I thought we would be together forever. That turned out incorrect when I thought Jimbow could survive out of his little fishbowl. On the other hand, what about the time I had met Christopher Anthony, he had become my best friend in the 2nd grade…I was 8 years old at the time, he 7. Gopher, which had become his nickname after he'd first confessed his obsession with them in 4th grade, was the only real friend I had. He was the one person I let get close and let see the real me. Sitting there in the sandbox during recess on the last day of 1st grade, crying my eyes out was where he had first came to me. Like an angel sent from the Heavens.
'I had wanted to fit in with the other 6 year olds, even knowing I would not be able to do it, I climbed the rusty ladder to the top and grasped my hands around the hard and cold pole. Taking a deep breath, I prepared myself to jump. With the other kids, protesting shouts for taking too long behind me, I jumped. A shriek escaped my lips as I gripped the pole tightly between my hands and swung. I was scared to move but after deep preparation, I swung back and forth a few times before releasing one hand and grasping the next pole.
Suddenly, I found myself swinging back, forward, and continuing on, a large smile formed across my face as I was nearing the last of the bars. But, caught up in the fact that I had even attempted this and yet I was doing it, I'd suddenly missed the last bar. I tried flinging my arm up to grasp the bar again as my right side dropped down, but my other hand seemed to think it needed to grasp too. So, I ended up letting go and found myself falling to the ground. I knew it wasn't that far from the ground, but when falling and thinking of everything I'd ever known, it seemed to take forever. At first I didn't feel anything as I fell into the sticks and rocks below. But, then it had come, like a bull seeing red. The pain fired up from my lower back to my head as I lay on the ground.
Tears welled in my eyes and ran over as I cried out. I didn't hear anyone coming to see if I was alright, so maybe the scream was in my own mind. Though, I could hear the laughter from above as the other kids found humor in my current situation. My eyes opened not realizing they'd closed as the tears continued to run in humiliation. I found myself struggling to stand knowing I couldn't stay there. Soon enough they would find away to hurt me further than I already was. I don't know how long it took, but I suddenly found myself crouched in on myself in a corner of the little sandbox our schoolyard housed.
I didn't hear the footsteps he'd made as he came over. His presence was unknown to me until he got down on his knees beside me and laid a small hand atop m shoulder. My body froze and stilled for the punch tat was surely to come. Yet, as I waited nothing happened. I finally got the courage to look up, only to come eye to eye with the strangest pair of grey orbs. They blinked and I did too opting I was dreaming.
"Pretty eyes," had been my first words and he'd laughed in response. I frowned thinking the owner of the pretty eyes to be laughing at me. Then he'd spoke, sobering up his laugher, "Are you alright Miss.?" He'd asked. I was more mature than the other kids in my grade, but I was still a child myself. Yet, I knew his voice seemed much older than who it belonged to and he'd called me Miss, what 6 year old refers to another as Miss.? (It wasn't until the next year that I'd found out he was actually 7.) I was honestly shocked. "Y-yes," I stuttered to get out.
My eyes roamed over his form, noticing the same uniform as the other boys were wearing. Yet his seemed much more fitting and he made it not seem so boring. His hair was a dark orange with specks of brown from what I could tell. He had a round face and his grey eyes wide with...worry? I seemed to take too long in my thoughts for then he'd cleared his throat before standing. For some reason my heart seemed to clench at the idea of him leaving. Yet, all he'd done was asked if I was alright. But, all he did was dust off his knees and hold out a hand to me. I didn't think before smiling gratefully and grasping his small hand in my own. "Don't worry, I'll protect you." All he'd said before leading me over to the merry-go-round. The pain in my back and head was long forgotten.'
We'd promised each other that we were going to be together until the end of the world. We'd promsied that if neither of us were married after the age of 28, we'd marry each other. There were no secrets between us, or at least I thought there wasn't. But, it turned out that Gopher had been hiding a huge secret from me. One that changed my life for the worse. He'd changed me in away that no one had, but nowadays I just seemd like a replica of my old self before I'd met him. I turned into the girl I was afriad to become at the age of 6. Now, standing an even 5'11", weighing 166.7pds, and at the firm age of 17 I was invisible. Just as I had been 11 years ago. There was no one in my corner I could confide in or trust. Gopher had left me, just as I always had nightmares he would. Yet, he'd always promised that we'd be together. "Forever until the Sun never shined bright and the Moon didn't bring night," was his response. But, his wasn't around to say that anymore. I, Belle Marie, had lost my only friend.