A/n: Welcome everybody! All two readers quite probably. Maybe even less! This is in the Muppets Tonight category, but it mixes in the Muppet Show as well- if Kermit and the rest were dividing their time between the two media. Or however you put it. Anyways, I asked a friend called Outerelf to post this on MuppetCentral, just so that way you know and don't think we're the same person. Have fun reading, and don't forget to revew!
It was extremely hot today. Majestic trees drooped, leaves limply hanging from branches. The asphalt road bubbled slightly, the extreme heat warping the view. Off in the extremely long distance of the end of the driveway, was the view of a mirage; a shimmering shinning puddle of water.
Various animals, including cats and rats and dogs and chickens and frogs and pigs and bears, were asleep in the lawn, finding the heat less oppressive outside then inside currently.
Inside of the house, a lone chicken laid an egg- it broke, and began to fry on the hot metal radiator. With a desperate cluck, it flapped its wings, creating a small breeze. A relieved sigh broke out from the frog standing next to it.
"Beauregard, have you fixed the air-conditioning yet?"
The brown furred janitor shook his head slowly, wiping dirty hands on coveralls, and wishing that he could sweat. "Nope, sorry Kermit. We'll have to either get a new one, or hire someone else to come take a look at it."
"And we don't have money for either, what with the curtains catching fire last week."
The frog turned to the yellow skinned male standing at his side with a clipboard. "Yes Scooter?"
"Sweetums asked if he could dig up the backyard and put in a pool." The gopher flipped the clipboard page up by one showing a rough sketch. "He even figured out how long and deep he could make it without hitting any of the main pipe lines."
"Better not, in the wintertime it could become a hazard." Kermit smiled at Scooter's disappointed expression. "That does give me an idea however- let's go to the beach!"
"We got banned from the last three after the lifeguards claimed we terrorized the beachgoers." The young teen glumly reminded the older frog, before glancing around- "By the way, where's Robin?"
"He went back to the Swamp to spend time with family… and get away from this heat."
"Wouldn't it be hotter down there?"
"Two words; watery mud."
Scooter would have blinked if he had eyelids, but restricted himself to just looking confused. "Oh, Scooter, could you make certain everyone has enough to drink? Water only- we don't want anyone collapsing from heat exhaustion."
"I'm on it chief!"
A blast of blessedly cool air drifted by them- both turned, smiles on their faces as they leaned into that wind- "LOOK OUT!"
Years of theatergoing had honed nerves into quick responses that threw them to the ground before they had even really registered the words. Above them, a rat flew out into the yard, and into a tree.
Frog and gopher rushed out to the tree, necks craning upwards to look. "I guess that I didn't put it into a high enough angle- I'll go back and try it again." The voice drifted out behind them, as a weird looking blue thing stood in the doorway, his sprained arm wrapped in a cast.
"NO!" The shriek came from above as the rat slowly began climbing down from his precarious perch. "No more shooting out of cannons, I refuse!"
"But, wasn't it fun Rizzo?" Gonzo's voice reflected the child-like confusion he always had around heights- mainly how not everyone loved them. The blue creature stepped up to the tree; his good arm reaching up to try and catch the rat before he fell.
Rizzo shimmied around to the other side, snubbing Gonzo's help. That sharpened Kermit's attention on the two; Rizzo wasn't one to refuse help, and Gonzo's help had always been accepted in the past no matter what the blue creature did to the rat.
"Rizzo?" Gonzo sounded just as confused as Kermit felt.
"It's too hot for this! I'm outta here- I'm visiting my cousins at the beach. Or somewhere where it's air-conditioned."
"Don't forget me, hokay? I am a King Prawn; they can't ban me from going home!" The shrimp, King Prawn, rushed out after the rat his arms waving in an attempt to slow the other down.
Rizzo didn't even notice as he took off down the street, and escaped into a sewer. The blue whatever was left standing at the foot of the tree, eyebrows furrowed, one hand still stretching up into the tree to catch the now gone rat.
"What was all that about?" The low voice snapped the trio to their senses, as a brown dog slowly made his way to them.
"Rowlf! Uhh, well- I don't know what exactly happened. One minute I had convinced Rizzo that being shot out of a cannon was fine, and the next thing-" Gonzo was cut off when an loud voice sang out,
"AIR CONDITIONING IS BACK!"
Instantly everyone on the lawn stampeded for the house, yells of halleluiah drowning out whatever Gonzo was about to say, sweeping the three up in its mad rush for the door. "Waah! Miss Piggy! Look out for the wall!"
"Can it frog! I'm getting in that building if moi must make a new door!"
"Cold air! Cold air! Cold air!"
"Whoa Animal, wait your turn-"
"For surely that's a relief. Like, I was about ready to melt!"
"Oh dear Beakie, I do hope that our experiment with the nitroglycerin hasn't been warped too much."
"Mee mee mee?"
"Finally, the air conditioning is fixed! Now that is doing things an American way!"
"Thank goodness, I thought that my brain was going to fry out there!"
"Well, at least his jokes couldn't get worse! Do-ho-ho-ho!"
"Beauregard, you are an angel!"
"Aww, shucks, it wasn't anything much!"
"Hey, watch the rabbit! Watch the rabbit! Don't step on me!"
"Camilla? What do you mean that the house is filled with fried eggs? Aren't there any scrambled- ow! I was just joking!"
Feathers flew, Muppets scrambled, and a new hole was placed in a wall. Smoke cleared to reveal Gonzo hanging upside down on the fake chandelier, Rowlf underneath the table, Scooter dazed at the bottom of the stairs, and Kermit draped (artistically) over bricks.
Rowlf groaned as he pushed himself up from beneath the table, feeling like the term 'Trampled to Death' had just gained a brand new meaning. Wincing, he rubbed his left arm, attempting to coax the tingling feeling from out of it.
"Kermit you alright?" The dog crouched slightly next to the frog, as said frog stirred and groaned, eyes opening slowly.
"Someone get the number on that truck that ran over me."
Rowlf chuckled softly as he reached out to catch a flailing arm, and pull Kermit onto his own two flippers. "Come on, we should make certain that Scooter is alright."
A yellow hand waved from the bottom of the stairs, "I'm fine, why don't you guys take care of Gonzo first?"
The two glanced upwards, to where Gonzo gleefully cackled and swung precariously on the chandelier. Kermit whistled loudly, a theater whistle, "Can I have a ladder in the living room please?"
An angry grumble sounded from upstairs, as large feet slowly began making its way down stairs. "There, Gonzo will be taken care of-"
"Don't bother! I'll get myself down!"
"Fine. Never mind about that ladder Sweetums!" Feet retreated back to an air-conditioning unit. "Scooter, are you alright?"
"Yeah, sure Boss. I was just trampled by nearly a hundred Muppets- just a normal theater day. Whoo- five seconds until curtain call, right?"
"Not today- theater is closed because the seats are being refurbished." The frog had originally been looking forward to a day off, before the air conditioning broke down, and Robin decided to leave for the swamp.
Rowlf, catching the odd look in Kermit's eyes, knew what was wrong instantly. He always seemed to know. "Oh, Kermit, did you call your mom yet to see if Robin got back home safely?"
Kermit brightened up at that ready-made excuse. "Not yet, I should go do that. Scooter, I'm leaving getting Gonzo down to you-"
"GEROMINO! AHAHAHAHAHA!" The excited yell followed by the bright blue creature dropping into a pot of hot water made the theater leader simply shake his head as he moved towards the back to find a phone.
Scooter and Rowlf lifted Gonzo from the water. The blue Muppet eagerly checked himself over. "Cool, third degree burns!"
Scooters eyes went heavenward for patience as he began to escort Gonzo out of the room. "Come on Gonzo, let's get you to the first aid kit. Camillia will freak out if you don't get those bandaged after all."
An answering squawk from the upstairs banister from a chicken made Gonzo sigh sadly, "Alright, I get it… But after this I gotta go look for Rizzo!"
"Rizzo is probably just going to go visit family Gonzo- he'll be back before too long. Until then; relax."
"But, what am I going to do for my show? I can't be shot out of the cannon with a lame arm, and I need to calibrate the machine to make certain that it'll fire properly."
"Get Beaker to do it. He's used to stuff like that."
"You're right! Hey, Beaker!" Before Scooter could stop him, Gonzo rushed off to the Muppet Labs in the basement. The Muppet took the stairs three at a time, in willful ignorance of how it would probably end up.
Sure enough, the sound of someone crashing against a wall floated upwards a few moments later. Scooter shook his head, and looked at the kitchen table. Rowlf was sitting on a chair, head on the table, breathing deep and uneven.
"Hey, you alright there Rowlf?"
The dog started slightly, looking up. "Yeah, don't mind me. Between the new piece I've been working on, and heat that's been pounding on us lately, I haven't been sleeping well."
"New piece?" Scooter perked up slightly; although Rowlf's piano/music pieces weren't the most popular part of the theater, they did bring in a solid income.
The dog stretch in his seat, yawning wildly, tongue lolling out in one of the most dog like manners the teen had seen yet. He shook himself, loose fur drifting to the ground. "New piece. It should be done in a few weeks."
The teen smiled wearily at that- in a few weeks they'd probably need it. Between Gonzo's wall busting, Beaker and Bunsen's fires, Mad Harry's explosions, and a dozen more Muppets, the theater had to be practically rebuilt once a week.
"You want to hear it? It may be a work in progress but it should be interesting at the very least."
Scooter looked at the dog, and at the papers scattered across the table detailing the different things Muppet Theater needed to keep running smoothly. It may be a day off, but a gophers work was never done… "I'm afraid not Rowlf. I gotta get working on these papers." The small mouth was puckered into a frown.
Rowlf swept up the papers in a single swipe, and moved towards the music room, ignoring the frantic yelp of, "Wait!"
"Come on, you can listen to music and do your papers at the same time. But you're way too stressed right now, and I think Kermit would agree with me if I said that you should relax just a little."
The yellow Muppet shook his head as he leaped for the papers; "But I need to concentrate! With all of this heat and the air-conditioning breaking down and everything else I haven't been able to do any of the papers!"
"Are you saying that I'm distracting?"
Flustered, Scooter blurted out the first thing that came to mind, "No! I mean, yes! I mean- what do you mean by that?"
Rowlf, laughing at the expense of the gopher, shouldered open the door. Heat poured out for a moment, until the blessed coolness of AC's working overtime poured into the room. "Relax, I know what you mean. Settle on down, and listen to some music. I'll play a nice cool piece."
The dog settled onto the bench, as the half-parrot teen settled onto the floor, sorting the papers efficiently. "Here, I'll start off with something slow- Greensleeves by Williams."
The first few notes filled the Muppet House, and Scooter's eyes closed for a single moment in appreciation to the music. Rowlf's head nodded in time to the music, paws dancing above the keys.
Scooter bent to the papers with a will, letting the music flow into him, and right back out again, caught in a world of paperwork and numbers.
The music faltered, only for a moment.