Hello all! Has anyone visited my blog? Anyone at all? No? Darn. Well, here's anther fanfiction! It's another story about death… how odd. It seems that's all I write. It's probably because it's so angsty that I keep writing about it. Huh. Anyway, I hope you enjoy!
Her heart slowed steadily until it was no more. I'm coming Okita-sensei… she thought happily. She'd waited for years to see him and now, she would be reunited finally. Just after the world had turned black it snapped back into color.
She was standing. The walls around her were dark gray but not black. They had an eerie feeling to them. This wasn't death. But then... what was this?
"O-Sei-chan!" Okita exclaimed, surprised. The room they were now standing in was where the others who had also died would come greet those who had recently died. Normally, the greeters would greet their loved ones and people who wanted to be with them more then anyone else. Okita had been shocked enough to hear his name be called as one of the greeters but now he was even more shocked to see Sei, standing there, looking around confused. "What are you doing? You're not supposed to be dead yet!"
Sei wanted to run to him but something kept her standing still no matter how much she struggled. "Okita-sensei!" Sei smiled widely. "I've missed you so much!"
Okita shook his head, refusing to believe. "O-Sei-chan… you're not supposed to be dead yet," he repeated. "What did you do?"
"Seppuku," Sei answered calmly. "Why does it matter? I'm here now, Okita-sensei. Haven't you missed me at all?" Sei felt her throat close with tears.. After all this time he still hadn't missed her.
"No," Okita said stubbornly. "You have to live. You have to live for both of us,
O-Sei-chan. I won't let you die."
"But I already did."
Okita walked to Sei and put his hands on her shoulders, holding her firmly. "Listen to me," he said. "I've died, Hijikata-san has died, Kondou-sensei has died. You and Saitou are the only ones who can help us now. You have to bring us honor. It's up to you now." Okita smiled. He still looked like such a boy. Nothing had changed about him.
"It's been ten years, Okita-sensei! And all you're going to do is tell me to go back? Am I that unimportant?" She was furious and upset. He really didn't care. Not one bit.
"You think that's how I feel?" Okita shot back. "I've missed you like nothing else! I've been watching you from up here everyday! I saw you visit my grave yesterday! You left a box of sweets, right? And a letter?"
"Okita-sensei…?" Sei asked, confused. "B-but... someone took them. Those things… they disappeared."
"Yes… I took them. Because you mean everything to me. How could I let your precious gifts sit in the cold? No, I had to tae them." Okita pulled her letter out of his kimono. "See?"
"You… you do have it!" Sei couldn't help but smile.
"Of course I do. Now, will you go back? And do what you're supposed to?"
Sei nodded, agreeing. "But can you even send me back?"
"Yep. You're only mostly dead right now. That's why you can't move. But, before you go back, you have to want to. You have to have no regrets about it. Okay?"
Sei thought a moment about it. "But what if I do?"
"Then it won't work," Okita explained. "In fact, you should be gone by now. So you must have one."
Sei looked at him honestly, searching his eyes.
"Oh," Okita said, understanding. How foolish of him. Why? Why did he wait to kiss her until he had to? Until the only reason he was kissing her because it was important? He wanted to kiss her because of who she was. Because he loved her. But all this was, was something he had to do. He hated it. He kissed her, ignoring the urge to tell her he couldn't because if he did now, it would just mean she needed to go and that was it.
It was bittersweet. Sei knew this had been the one thing she had wanted through all the days she had known him and now she had finally gotten it. But the knowledge of the fact that he was only doing this to get rid of her hurt her like nothing else.
Okita slowly pulled back, smiling softly. "Are you okay now? Can you go back?" His words wanted to make him wince. He was still pretending he didn't love her. Even though he knew well enough he did. Would he ever tell her?
Sei sniffled and wiped a tear from her eyes. She wrapped her arms around him, holding on tightly. "No. You didn't mean it. I know it. You… only want me to leave!"
"That's not true. I want you to stay. I want you to be with me forever. I want you, O-Sei-chan. I need you. But the world needs you more then me." The truth hurt even more then he thought it would. He didn't care if the world needed her. He needed her. The world wouldn't know the difference. He shook his head of his selfish thought. Stop it, Souji.
"Then... I guess this is goodbye isn't it? Since I've finally heard you say that. I… I think… I think I'm happy," Sei muttered comforted by his words. She wanted to say more. But she was already returning.
A tear escaped Okita's eye, just after Sei disappeared. "I'll miss you," he said to no one. She was gone, and he was alone again until she really did die. Okita went back to his corner and sat down, awaiting his name to be called again. Awaiting her.
Hope you enjoyed! By the way, the italics don't symbolize flashback. I thought maybe some people would think that so I thought I'd tell you. ^^ Reviews are much appreciated! As always! In fact I'd adore you forever if you did. PLEASE review. I'll beg you forever.