Tryst; Of Sorts

Chapter 1 – Verbal Diarrhoea

Beast Boy whistled tunelessly as he ambled down to Cyborg's garage, casually catching brightly coloured sweets in his mouth. The tower was quiet for a Friday; Starfire and Robin were in Gotham (he had sulked when he realised that he wasn't invited), and Cyborg had been working on the T-Car with Raven for the better part of the morning. Beast Boy had spent his time lazing on the couch, alternating between watching cartoons and playing with Silkie.

Now he was bored. And fidgety. In the last week, only Plasmus and Billy Numerous had attacked – well, attempted to in Billy's case, Beast Boy mentally corrected in his mind. The moron had multiplied to excess on a rickety old house; the subsequent weight of his multiplications had brought down the building and he knocked himself out.

So much for villainy.

Reaching the entrance to the garage, Beast Boy knocked. "Hey Cy, you wanna go train? I'm bored, man. This week hasn't exactly been a drain … "

The door cracked open, revealing Raven.

Beast Boy twitched. "Aww, you're not still mad at me are you? I said I was sorry! How was I supposed to know that Billy-"

"Don't. Speak." Raven spoke through gritted teeth. "Presenting me as a date to Billy Numerous in a jocular manner in return for cessation of attack was not amusing."

"I don't see how you turned down a ride in a monster truck."

"And the subsequent 'roll in the hay'?"


Raven opened the door properly and floated to sit cross-legged on Cyborg's worktop. Beast Boy wandered in, spotting Cyborg's legs protruding from under the T-Car. "Yo, Cy," greeted Beast Boy, lightly kicking his friend's leg. "How long are you gonna be feeling up the T-Car for? I could do with someone to train with and you could do with some company."

"Thanks," said Raven monotonously. Beast Boy smiled sheepishly at her.

"No can do B." Cyborg's voice was muffled, accompanied by the clanging of metal. "Upgrading my baby here is probably gonna take the rest of the weekend. She still ain't running smoothly after Plasmus slimed her," he said mournfully, sliding out from under the car. His face and torso were covered in purple slime. "I'm finding goo in places I didn't even know she had!"

Beast Boy cocked an eyebrow. "Ooookay, too much information there, dude. What say you and I get some training done, fair Raven?" He gallantly offered his arm to her. She shrugged, and floated off the counter. Cyborg chuckled at the scene.

"That the type of proposal you after, Rae? I still say you ask him out; boy's hardly gonna say no."

Beast Boy pivoted to face the now-frozen empath. "Whaaat? You've been holding out on me Rae. You like someone? Who? Do I know him? Do we know him?" He paused, eyes bulging. "It's Billy Numerous, isn't it? Oh man, you say I've got bad taste what with Muffin and Cookie and Kandy –"

A dark band of energy slapped him on the mouth. "To cut off your verbal diarrhoea," snapped Raven, clearly irritated, "Yes, I like a guy at my poetry club. None of you know him, which is a Very Good Thing. I don't want anyone scaring him off. You have terrible taste in women; at least Trenton isn't named after a food product. And don't call me Rae."

"Seriously girl, he's called Trenton?" Cyborg said disbelievingly. Beast Boy's sniggers became audible as his gag dissolved.

Raven flushed slightly. "He wrote a very good poem about the gradual decline of romance and chivalry in our over-sexualised adolescence."

Beast Boy cleared his throat and began to recite. "Roses are red, violets are blue. I'll now proceed to sleep with you. Now that's romance. Rhymed and everything."


Cyborg grinned. "Oh, you want classy? Roses are red, violets are blue. I like Pinot Grigio. Boom, instant class!"

"I don't smell, but you sure do."

"You look like a monkey and smell like one too." At this, Beast Boy shifted into a monkey.

"You sure could do with some better shampoo." Cyborg scowled.

"Low blow man! If I had a rock, I'd throw it at you."

"I'm schizophrenic, and so am I."

Raven rolled her eyes. "When brains were given out, where were you?"

Cyborg and Beast Boy both stared at Raven. "You simultaneously insulted us … and made a joke. I knew this day would come! I'm so proud of you Ravey!" Beast Boy mock-wiped a tear from his eye.

"Must you diminish my name so?"


Raven sighed. "Let's go train." As she glided out of the garage, she overheard Beast Boy.

"Hey, what's wrong with girls named after food products?"

The evening found Cyborg, Beast Boy and Raven in the common room. Beast Boy, sprawled on the sofa idly thumbed a comic book whilst Cyborg blasted through Mega Monkeys Unlimited.

"Oh yeah, you monkeys don't know what's gonna hit you. You wanna know? Wanna know? It's gonna be Cyborg, ready to kick your little monkey butts! Booyah!"

Raven floated over to sit on the end of the sofa, nudging Beast Boy's feet out of the way, cup of tea and book in hand. She opened the heavy, leather bound book, catching Beast Boy's attention. "How can you concentrate on that?" He gestured at her book. "With that?" He gestured at the now –maniacally laughing Cyborg. Raven shifted minutely.

"I've read it before. It's not difficult," she muttered. Beast Boy grinned, the tip of a fang just visible.

"I can smell lies, Raven. Honest. But mostly your book smells suspiciously … like TeenVague!" With that, he leapt across the couch, catching Raven by surprise and her book out of her hand. Raven leapt to her feet; her eyes glowed white and dark energy surrounded Beast Boy but not soon enough. Beast Boy waved the formerly concealed magazine.

"Wish you'd shared this with us sooner; I've been dying to know how to know which eye shadow suits my skin tone the best. And look," he teased, waving the front cover at Raven. "Featured article on page three! 'When will your crush ask you out? Find out now!' Ooh, free perfume sample … Aaack!" Beast Boy started spluttering as the bottle he was holding exploded in his face. Raven was angry.

"Thank you so much for invading my privacy Beast Boy," she fumed. Panic crossed Beast Boy's face. "That's just so helpful. So what if this is the first guy I liked since Malchior? That's not a big deal at all, is it? Maybe you find it easy to do God-knows-what with Cupcake and Pookie and-"

Cyborg interrupted the escalating argument before Beast Boy was injured too badly. "Calm down Raven! The little green idiot didn't mean anything nasty. He's just … an idiot. Hardly the worst thing he's done."

"I object to that," objected Beast Boy, wiping ineffectively at his face. "Man, 'The Blush of Love's True Light' does not smell good. At all." Raven glowered through slitted eyes. He 'meeped' and backtracked. "Rae, you don't need to look at Starfire's magazines for dating advice. Why would you when you've got two studs right here to talk to?" Beast Boy pointed to himself, then Cyborg, then at Raven. "Am I right?"

Cyborg spoke before Raven shoved the pillow she'd been eyeing down Beast Boy's neck. "Hate to say it Rae, but green bean's got a bit of a point. You're better off with friends that know you than some dumb magazine like that. In fact, wasn't that what you were leading to in the garage?"

Tension sufficiently broken, Raven slumped on the couch. Beast Boy cautiously sat next to her, then skittered away to the other end when she glowered at him. Cyborg planted himself in the middle. "Well all righty then! BB and I are gonna help you become the lean, mean datin' machine you were born to be!" He nudged her playfully in the ribs.

Raven almost smiled. "I was born as a portal for Trigon to destroy Earth as we know it."

"Now isn't this the better alternative?" Beast Boy quipped.

A/N: First attempt at a TT fiction. I am not American so if anyone spots any dialogue more akin to Mad Mod, please let me know. Ditto to grammar/spelling mistakes. Criticism is more than welcome!