Disclaimer: I do not own anything. Not a thing.
Author's Note: This is just a silly little drabble that popped into my head because something very similar happened to me in real life. But that's a whole different story! Enjoy…
"Let me go, I'm here to help!" The Doctor shouted as he was pulled forwards by two very vicious looking men who were, apparently, completely deaf to his pleas and instead convinced he was some kind of spy or, worse, a stowaway. "You have to let me go, listen to me! You are all in danger if you don't just listen to me!" The Doctor sighed as he struggled in vain. "Fine, at least take me to your Captain. Parlay? Do you understand me? Parlay!"
"Boys, boys, what's all this commotion?" The Doctor found himself spun around quickly as a harsh female voice came from behind him. "Honestly I leave you alone for two seconds and…" She trailed off quickly, her eyes meeting the Doctor's. "Ah. Right. "
"River?" He gasped, astounded at what he was seeing.
"I urm… I'm a pirate today. Long story. Right. Yes, I… Let him go." River stammered.
"But Captain?" One of the men muttered sadly.
"I said let him go!" River yelled as she stomped away, lifting up her eye patch and rubbing her eyes wearily. "Of course. The first time I meet the potential-love-of-my-life afer I killed him and then saved him and then got left by him and I'm dressed as a bloody pirate. Of course I am." She muttered quietly to herself as she tried to resist the urge to bang her head off the wooden beam in front of her.
"Don't worry about it." The Doctor grinned as he crept up behind her and River jumped a mile into the air. "I quite like it. Especially the hat. Pirate hats are cool. Now are you going to explain why you are apparently the Captain of a pirate ship? Or is it just that you like playing dress up?"
"Oh…" River grinned and rolled her eyes and said the only thing she could think of to get out of this very awkward situation. "Spoilers, sweetie."
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