Hello, people. This is me, some unknown idiot, writing a No More Heroes fanfiction. I have nothing to say on this part, except for the fact that this is the introduction, hence it being so short. I know it's veru uninteresting, but I think it gets better in the later chapters. (I've already written two chapters ahead, just 'cause) so yeah... hope you enjoy this AU No More Heroes fanfition! (Awkward ending. xD)


The tall, Albino man looked up at his opponent, Travis Touchdown, from a distance. They both stood on a rooftop, having just battled with missiles, lasers, bullets and a katana. ''This guy must be pretty tough. Deflecting so many laser shots at once... he'll be no match for me, though. I'll show him!'' Helter Skelter thought to himself as he revealed a long, shining blade from his gauntlet. Travis stood there for a moment, bathed in the morning twilight. ''Alright, this is it, the time to show Silvia and the world what you're really made of!'' Travis said to himself, under his breath. They both charged at eachother, adrenaline running, hearts pounding as they closed in to eachother, moving in for their kill.

With one swipe: It was over. His body fell to the ground, blood spurting from his wound. Travis Touchdown, the man who strived to be number one, was killed, before his journey had even begun. Helter stood up from the ground, and gazed down on Travis' corpse. He smirked and inhaled from his cigar, which he was rarely seen without. He turned around, only to see Silvia. The head of the UAA, the United Assassins Association. ''Well done, Mr. Skelter. I'm not suprised you made it out alive... this man was a slob. not assassin material at all... Not like you.'' She said, in her usual, needlessly seductive voice.

''Thanks babe. These guys are just target practice for when I move up in the ranks anyway.'' He replied, as he turned and gazed out at the city below him. ''Which reminds me.'' Silvia said in an inquisitive voice. ''When do you think that's going to happen? You've been rank eleven for quite a while now. I believe you have the potential to become the best there is.''

He turned his head to her, and paused for a brief moment. ''...I'm not sure. I think I've still got a lot of work to do, if I want to beat those guys.'' Silvia walked up behind him and said in a softer voice; ''What have you got to lose?'' Helter turned to her swiftly. ''How 'bout my life?'' he said, loudly. ''Look. Just try and get to number ten at least, and then you can decide what to do. Deal?'' she replied, in a more serious tone.

''Hmm. Well... I suppose I could get to ten... I mean, he can't be that much more tough than me... can he?'' He smirked, as he finally gave in to Silvia's wishes. ''We'll see. I'll give you a call as soon as I've set up the next match.'' She giggled slightly, as she walked away.

''Rank ten...'' Helter said to himself. ''May not be so bad...'' He walked away, as Talbot and Weller cleaned up the remains of Travis.

To Be Continued...