I ran like I have never ran before, only this time it didn't bring me joy for I was running away from Bella. My Isabella, my soul, my one true mate, the person I have waited a hundred years for, and now that she's finally mine, what happens? I run.
As I ran I felt like I was being torn apart, the two sides of me in constant battle. One side arguing that I should never leave Bella, the other side telling me she will never survive while surrounded by me and my family.
My Bella told me all the time that she wanted to be a vampire. So much so that now I just shrugged it off because it was easier than arguing with her. For me it would be perfect if Bella were to be like myself, at least then I could hold her and kiss her. I mean really kiss her with all the love I feel for her because when I kiss her now, and when I hold her I have to be so careful I don't break her. She is so fragile to me, there's nothing I want more. But how could I take away her beautiful soul like that, take away her human life? Giving her immortality would be wrong, she may not realise it now but in the years ahead when she wants a child and I can't give her that, she will hate me for making her an unchanging monster; A VAMPIRE.
Why did jasper have to attack Bella, why did I ruin Bella's birthday by taking her to a house full of vampires in the first place? The answer to that one would be ALICE.
Alice loved Bella almost as much as I did, their friendship was intense and Bella loved Alice too. I wanted Bella to enjoy her birthday, I wanted her to have "human" experiences so when Alice suggested a party, even though I knew Bella would hate it, I agreed.
After all, it may well be her last birthday as a human.
After the party Jasper was full of apologies. It's so hard for him. As I read his mind it was a jumbled mix of blood-lust and remorse. He hasn't had as long as the rest of us to get used to our "vegetarian" lifestyle. The blood of animals isn't as luscious as that of humans.
Most of us get by but Jasper, he only caught a small amount of Bella's blood scent and he was frenzied and desperate for it. If the rest of us hadn't been there, I'm positive that poor Bella would have been drained completely.
One of the things I love most about my Bella is her smell, it's almost like freesias. When we first met I wanted her blood like I have never ever wanted blood before but now the love I have has taken over.
Now, I am her protector…or at least I was.