Twilight Bashing

Alchemistofpeace: Hi! Alchemistofpeace here, but you can just call me Peace.

Peace: This is Twilight Bashing and here we're gonna bash Twilight.

Greedling: *sarcastically* Wow, couldn't think of a more creative title if you tried.

Peace: I didn't introduce you yet idiot, stay back screen!

Greedling: I don't see why I-MMMPH! *dragged backstage*

Peace: Thank you. First, some characters from FMA. Only some cause I cant fit them all in this damn studio without getting rid of some other guests. So here's Ed, Al, Mustang, Hughes, Greedling, Kimblee, and Hawkeye.

Mustang: Why the hell is Kimblee here?

Peace: Because I want him here. Besides, we're going to have another psychotic serial killer in another chapter or two. So get used to one while you can.

Mustang:… Just keep him away from me.

Peace: Sure. Now, here's the pedophilic sparklepire, edward cullen!

Kimblee: Why no capitals?

Peace: He doesn't deserve them.

Ed: Makes sense to me.

Sparklepire: Um, hi?

Peace: Hi, nobody. Ed, you first.

Ed: WHOOPIE! *transmutes a spike through Sparklepire*

Peace: Colonel Dumbass?

Mustang: Who?

Hawkeye: I think she means you, sir.

Mustang: I'm a … Dumbass?

Peace: Yes you are.

Mustang: But… I thought I was one of the characters you love! T-T

Peace: You are! I torture all the characters I like.

Kimblee: Ooh, you're a sadist! Just like me! :D

Peace: I wouldn't be writing this if I wasn't. Mustang, you gonna flame the pixie or what?

Mustang: *sniff* Well, I guess. *snaps*

Sparklepire: *girly shriek of agony*

Mustang: Now I see why you killed people Kimblee; It's fun as hell! :D *snapsnapsnap*

Peace: Whoa, leave some for the rest of them alright!

Mustang: *sigh* Fine. *walks away defeated*

Peace: Al, you wanna go next?

Al: Sure. *beats the crap out of Sparklepire*

Sparklepire: *whimper*

Greedling: WAIT A MINUTE! Peace said she liked to torture people she liked. Does that mean she likes Sparklepire?

Everyone: O.O *run to the other side of the studio*

Peace: *rolls eyes* I like torturing my favorite characters mentally and emotionally. Characters I don't like get the crap beat out of them.

Greedling: Oh, okay. My turn next?

Peace: No, Hughes. He hasn't said a word since he got here.

Hughes: Thanks Peace! *throws knives at Sparklepire*

Sparklepire: OKAY, I'LL BITE! WHAT DID I DO TO DISERVE THIS!

Peace: You sparkle.

Mustang: You're a pedophile.

Kimblee: You don't kill people, like normal vampires do.

Greedling: You freaking existed.

Peace: Hawkeye?

Hawkeye: Right. *shoots Sparklepire over nine thousand times*

Peace: Greed-

Greedling: YES! FINALY I GET A CHANCE! *throws Sparklepire into a vat of lava* *evil Kira laugh*

Peace:… Anyone else afraid?

Everyone: *nod*

Peace: Kimblee?

Kimblee: *blows up Sparklepire*

Peace: Okay I think we're done here. Goodbye rea-

Ed: WAIT A MINUTE!

Peace: *sigh* What Ed?

Ed: You forgot to do the disclaimer.

Peace: Oh, snickerdoodles you're right. I don't own FMA, sadly, and I sure as hell don't own Twilight. THANK GOODNESS. I couldn't bear it if my writing sucked that bad. Now, as I was saying, goodbye readers!