The Admirers of My Life
"It's not that you should never love something so much that it can control you.
It's that you need to love something that much so you can never be controlled.
It's not a weakness.
It's your best strength."
House of Healing
I'm sorry, Viola.
I opened the door and stepped out into the cold, lonely night.
I curse myself as I walk away.
Cuz I wanna go back.
I wanna jump back into that warm bed. Curl up beneath the covers. Wait and wait and wait.
Until I hear Viola come back.
She's been ignoring me all day. It would be a lie if I said it didn't hurt.
But, this plays to my advantage.
I'm a pretty bad liar and let's face it; I would have nearly told her everything earlier if I hadn't blurted out the jealous thing.
For a second after I'd said that, I regretted it straight away.
My heart went cold when I saw her back.
As tho the words, "Leave me alone", were scrawled across it.
I blew at my frozen hands.
Viola's hands are warm.
I wish I cud be holding her hands right no-
Ugh, shut up!
Damn it, Todd. Focus!
I ain't gonna give up.
If it's for Viola, I'll do anything.
Oh God no!
I began to run as I heard my name fall from a girl's lips.
I cudn't be Viola!
How cud she find out that fast?
My head began to pound as my wound ached.
The footsteps were getting closer.
The air was getting colder.
My heart was racing faster.
Go back, Viola!
I don't want to run from her anymore.
I don't want to leave her alone.
But, the gift!
Only a few more months!
That's all I have to endure.
For her I'd...
What the hell is going on?
Is the world moving slower or is she just tryin' to kill me with the tension?
So she stopped, huh?
I guess this is the moment where I turn around and she slaps the crap out of me.
I swallow loudly.
Be a man, Todd.
If yer can face three armies then yer can ruddy well face a slightly terrifying girl.
I stared at the girl before me.
I began to back away slowly.
Cuz to be perfectly honest, I'd rather face a pissed off Viola with a knife than this... thing.
"So, you've become a runaway?"
I stared at her.
Her dirty blonde hair.
Her dull, blue eyes.
Her long, spidery eyelashes plastered in thick clumps of black.
This ain't my Viola.
How cud I even mistake her for Viola?
Viola was an angel compared to Steph who was like a pile of shi-
She glared at me and then seemed realise what she was doing, so she attempted to put on an apologetic face (which in my eyes, looks exactly the same as her pissed off face).
"Look, I know I'm not exactly on your favourite person list at the moment, but..."
She never was anyway. In fact, I was kind enuf to make a whole new list just for her.
I believe it was called the Bitch List.
"But, I guess, I really just want to be with yo-"
My eyes automatically shot towards the House of Healing to see an enraged Viola marching towards us.
I looked down at Steph. Her face was contorted with her smug smile.
Seriously, if Viola ain't here to kill her then I ruddy will.
"Why did you have to interrupt us? Me and Todd were getting pretty close, you know."
Yep, I'm gonna kill this effing girl!
I glanced over to see Viola's reaction. Her face seemed more composed as she came up close to Steph's face.
I heard a quiet whisper laced with poison escape Viola's lips.
My heart leapt to my throat as Viola pulled away with a smug smile of her own.
Steph stumbled backwards as she attempted to obtain some space.
But, it wasn't long before Steph was standing straight with her usual confidence.
"Oh? Doesn't that sound a little strange coming from a girl who hasn't even attempted to get close to him?"
I saw it.
I actually saw it.
A fire within Viola's eyes igniting.
Oh, yer betta run Steph...
As tho it was happening in slow moshun, Viola's hand rose above her head and then struck Steph's face with a strength I definitely didn't know she had.
"YOU DON'T KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT ME!"
Steph reeled back from the pain but tried to slap Viola back before I grabbed her wrist.
"Stop. Just go..."
She looked up at me and I noticed how red her cheek was.
I nearly felt sorry for her before I remembered that she was about to hit Viola back.
I gave Steph a small push and eventually she began running towards the Council meeting locashun.
No doubt her ma and pa will know about this.
I looked at Viola to find her still fuming.
Wait. She wasn't thinking about slapping me, right?
"I'm not going to let you keep avoiding my questions. And neither am I going to ask politely. Tell me what you are doing."
My throat seemed to close up at that exact moment.
Viola grabbed the neck of my shirt and pulled me towards her.
Damn, why is she so scary today?
I could smell her scent.
It wasn't anything like Steph's.
It was clean, natural and just so...Viola.
She tugged on my shirt to show her impatience.
What am I goin to do?
Should I tell her?
But, I wanna wait till her birthday.
I want it to be the best present she will ever get.
"Can't yer wait a couple more months?"
Why did she have to answer so quickly?
And, that's when I decided.
Maybe she is not the only one who wants the secret to be revealed.
I'm tired of avoiding her.
Bradley has to lie to her.
Ben is afraid of her.
I just wanna be with her again.
I wanna tell her.
I'm going to tell her.
Was she controlling me?
Was she able to control me cuz I love her?
I loved her too much to be controlled.
This is my decishun.
"Fine, I'll show you my secret."
A/N: Hi people :) I know I have been uploading later but that's because I'm trying to think of ideas. I do have a plan but it kinda ran out after chapter 6 or 7 so when I'm writing, I'm improvising so it takes quite a while cuz I change my mind a lot :/ So, anyway, next chapter you should find out what Todd's prezzie for Viola is! Yay! Even though you probably already know because I have thrown a few hints in here and there and they are pretty obvious (oh well). I hope you enjoyed this chapter cuz I enjoyed making Viola slap Steph ;)