Disclaimer- I don't own Doctor Who. I do however own Josh and Charlie. :)
So. This has been a long time coming. About 3 or 4 months to be exact. It's sorta an AU scene of School Reunion. Ummm… Warnings for this, it might be a bit touchy for some people.
It was the second day of the Doctor and Roses little undercover operation, and the Doctor had been assigned the detention duty for lunchtime. The Doctor hated the idea of detention. It wasn't because he didn't think it was a good punishment (Well it wasn't really, but that wasn't the point) it was because it meant- he looked down at his list and counted the names- one kid, only one? That's odd… He thought. But it meant that one kid had to sit still for the whole of lunch without talking! He didn't know how they managed it. He knew he certainly couldn't. Then a thought occurred to him: He'd have to sit still and not talk too. Well, he thought. That's not going to be easy.
The Doctor walked into the detention room and sat down at the teacher's desk that was at the front of the class. Then, deciding that he didn't particularly like being at the front of the class, he took a seat next to the boy who had just walked in and sat down without a word. Deciding he didn't really like the whole not talking thing he spoke, "Hello," The Doctor said with a smile, "I'm Mr Smith."
"Yeah, I know," The boy replied. The Doctor eyed him. He was a tall boy, with brown hair that covered his eyes and was in dire need of a haircut. He was wearing the same uniform as every other student, except his seemed more dirty and crinkled. The boy shifted uncomfortably under the Doctors gaze, but didn't look up.
The Doctor frowned. What was it about this boy? He was different. The Doctor liked different. "What's your name then?" the Doctor asked not looking down at his list.
Finally the boy looked up. "Josh."
The Doctor smiled. "Josh Porter." He recalled from the list, "It looks like it's just you and me, so why don't you tell me a bit about yourself?"
Josh gave him a strange look, and looked back down at the desk, "like what?"
The Doctor sighed, it looked like getting him to talk would be harder than it seemed. So the Doctor decided to open up first. "Like family, me, I don't have any. Not anymore. Rose the lunch lady is the closest I've got to family. She wouldn't like me calling her that. 'Rose the lunch lady.' She'd probably slap me… So Josh," the Doctor caught himself, "got any siblings?"
He hesitated, and suddenly it all seemed to come tumbling out of mouth in a rush of emotion. "I have… Had… A little sister." Josh said, looking into the Doctor's eyes for the first time. The Doctor could see the tears building. Oh no. no, no, no, no, no He's not saying what I think… Is he? But Josh continued and confirmed the Doctor's fears. "She was five when she… went. A week before Christmas two years ago." By the time he had finished, Josh had tears running down his cheeks. "But the teachers here, they don't care. Top marks or you're out. Perfect behaviour or you're out. Complain about anything and you're out!" he continued with increasing anger. The Doctor could see it had been building up for a long time, and nobody cared? This boy had lost his sister and nobody cared?
"Josh. I'm not like them. I know what it feels like… To lose somebody. I understand." The Doctor said in sympathy.
"Yeah?" Josh asked, seeming to be calmed down by his words.
"Yeah." The Doctor gave him a small smile, despite the circumstances. He paused, should he ask? Probably. This boy had been holding in all the emotion for too long, he needed to talk about it. He should ask. Yes. He would. So, as carefully as he could, he asked, "Do you want to talk about her?"
Josh sniffed and looked at him. For a second the Doctor thought he wasn't going to reply, but then after a few seconds, he started to talk. "She was… She was your usual five year old y'know? She was so happy all the time and energetic and always asking questions. And then she…" That was when Josh stopped talking and the Doctor realised he was crying again. This wasn't fair, the Doctor thought. A boy this age should be worrying about school and girls, not this. Josh took a deep breath, "and then she was gone, and I didn't have anyone asking questions anymore. I didn't know what to do with myself. There was no one to make me happy. There was no one to make me feel important. Like I mattered. She always made me feel special. I don't know… How, but she did." He took a shaky breath and continued.
"She was in the hospital for almost a week, but there was nothing they could do. She was so strong though, the whole time. Even on her last day, all she wanted to know was if she'd be able to see Poppy, our cat, soon," Josh paused and a sad smile made its way to his face and the memories. "My parents split up a month after, my Mum just… She couldn't take it. I don't blame her. She said I looked too much like her, my sister." Josh looked over at him, and for the first time, the Doctor realised he was wearing a jumper on an extremely hot day. Oh Josh.
"What was her name?" The Doctor asked softly.
"Charlotte. Charlotte Olivia Porter. But she liked Charlie. She said… She said Charlotte was too princess-y, and she didn't want to be a princess. She said she wanted to be… Just like me." That broke him. Josh broke down in sobs, and without even thinking the Doctor gathered him in his arms and held him as he shook.
"Will it ever get any better?" Josh asked five minutes later, when his tears had all run dry.
"Yeah. It will. One day you'll find someone that makes you realise the world isn't as awful as it seems. That there really is good with the bad. One day you'll wake up and realise, she wouldn't have wanted this," the Doctor gestured loosely to Josh's covered arms. "And that's when it'll all start to turn around. It might take a while, it might take you hitting rock bottom, but it will happen. I promise. And the drinking and the cutting," Josh gave him a shocked looked, and the Doctor replied with a look of his own, "It's not what she would want for you. She'd want her big brother to stay strong and fight. She wanted to be just like you, well, now it's your turn to be strong and be just like her."
"I can't… I just… I dunno how. She was my little sister." Josh said, then so quietly, the Doctor almost missed it, "I was meant to be looking after her that day. I took her to the park but she… She wondered off while I was talking to my friend… Somehow she ended up in a little alleyway." He started to become distraught again; the Doctor couldn't say he blamed him. This boy seemed to be 'coping' by falling into a downward spiral, and the Doctor knew exactly how he felt. "She ate something. She must've thought it was a lolly. I found her and she was just lying there! She was so white, and she had foam coming out of her mouth and she was hardly breathing and… I didn't know what to do!"
"There's nothing you could have done." The Doctor tried to tell him, but was cut off by Josh yelling.
"That's what everyone said! There was nothing you could have done. That's what the Doctor's said! That's what my friends said! Hell, that's even what my parents said! But they were wrong!" he slumped and suddenly the Doctor was looking at a new person. He was no longer the angry young man with the mental and physical scars, now he just looked like a defeated boy who didn't know what to do.
"Josh. Look at me and listen," the Doctor said firmly, "a week from now, I probably won't be here, but I want you to remember this, you are amazing. I think so, your sister thought so, and hopefully, given time, you'll think so too. You are going to do great things. But to do that, you need to remember one thing: Charlotte Olivia Porter will always be alive. Here." He touched Josh's heart, "and she's going to help you through the tough times you've got coming. Trust me, I know."
"What d'you mean you're not going to be here?" Josh asked, worried. "I need your help!"
"You don't need me, you've got Charlie. This school, it's not the place for me." The Doctor said as the bell went, "but if you need me after I'm gone, just call me. I'll hear it." He finished with a small smile and moved towards the door. "You coming? You must be starving. Come on then, we'll get Rose the lunch lady to make us something."
"Thought you said you should call her that," Josh mumbled but followed him anyway.
"Weeellll, what she doesn't know won't hurt her right?" The Doctor said looking over at him. He knew Josh would never truly be the same as he was before, but this, this was a start.
The ending was a bit… Yeah. But this was something I just had to finish and get off my computer and today I was in just the right depressive mood to do it. So review my madness and make me happy.