Hi guys! I'm back! Sorry for the (extremely) late update :( But my computer had shut down completely and it took a few months to finally fix it :'(
I'm so sorry for the short chapter after such a long break...But I just wrote this right after I got my computer back from fixing and I thought I should update as quick as possible before anyone forgot me ;)
Anyways, enjoy :D
Chapter 10: The broken fragments.
After I had finally found myself a simple violet dress and hesitantly put it on, we could then have a somewhat normal conversation that didn't involve shrieking or throwing pillows or other less fragile artifacts.
"So, are you...Hoshina Utau?"
My eyes were covered by my blonde bangs so I couldn't see his face, but I guessed that it was something in between honest surprise and bitter disbelief.
Think of something, Utau! Should I just admit everything and tell him that I was Hoshina Utau the entire time? Or lie and continue to live the normal life I've always wanted?
I knew what the best choice was; to lie and pretend that nothing happened.
But I didn't want to lie to him, whenever I opened my mouth to utter any word, my chest would tighten almost painfully as I thought about lying to Kukai.
"Utau, remember, you're only attending school for 1 year then we're going straight back to the business world, got it?"
My head shot up, finally meeting eyes with Kukai. He seemed startled by my sudden action, but made no move to question me.
"Yes. I am."
Kukai's face was unreadable, but flickers of emotions passed through his eyes as his stare bore into mine.
"But I'm not Tsukiyomi Utau, your classmate."
Before Kukai could fully comprehend my answer, I continued speaking, giving no room for him to question me.
"My name is Hoshina Utau, I am 17 years old and a singer. I have never been to school in my life, and I have a cousin named Tsukiyomi Utau."
Then I stared at him, waiting for his reply, would he believe me? Or say that I'm a filthy liar and never talk to me again? I was terrified of whatever reply he would say, as either would be denying my truthful existence.
Kukai remained silent, his eyes nearly glowing with foreign emotions I've never seen him with, lips pursed tight and thin, and he refused to meet my eyes.
He whispered something under his breath, so small that I couldn't hear anything, just a slight mumble of words that he must have muttered out.
A piercing silence filled the air as I gulped nervously.
"Well then, do you know me? Hoshina-san?" Kukai exclaimed brightly, his lips stretched into a wide smile as he stood up from his seat.
What should I say? Ok, Utau, this is the first time Hoshina Utau met Souma Kukai so I shouldn't act like I know him.
"N-no. I believe this is the first time we've met."
Kukai's smile faltered for a while but was quickly hidden by an even brighter smile, "Haha of course, sorry Hoshina-san...Well! I'm Souma Kukai! Utau's classmate and friend from the Guardians! Nice to meet you!"
It felt awkward and unnatural that Kukai was calling me Hoshina-san, but I swallowed the bizarre feeling down and smiled back.
"Nice to meet you, Souma-kun."
After our unnerving exchange of introduction, Kukai bowed politely and said he should get going, and he asked me to tell 'Utau' to call him whenever she got back. I nodded in reply.
"It was good to see you Hoshina-san, I hope to see you around," he smiled, his eyes lingered momentarily at my eyes then down to my lips, but was quickly discarded as he turned around to leave.
Sudden realization struck my head as I yelled out before my brain could catch up to my mouth.
Kukai stopped in his tracks, but didn't turn to look at me. "Yes, Hoshina-san."
I bit my bottom lips, should I ask him? My head felt like it was going to explode in any second if I didn't. But...If I don't ask right now, I have a feeling I'll never get it out.
"Have we...Met before?" I spoke slowly and hesitantly, eyeing his unmoving back for any signs of emotion. But he remained unnerved and quiet.
Just as I was about to repeat my question, Kukai spoke.
"No. This is the first time we've met. Hoshina-san."
Then he walked away, not even once did he turn to wave or acknowledge me. And that pained me.
I didn't understand, why did his statement hurt so much? Each time he called me Hoshina-san, it felt like something sharp was piercing my chest. And the way he said the sentence, so stoic and unfriendly, like it was a decided fact and he wasn't going to do anything to change that.
My hand lingered on my pounding head, each time I saw a new side of Kukai I've never seen before, my head hurt like it was about to be ripped to shreds, like something was missing but I didn't know what, like...I was forgetting something.
"-Run Utau! Run!"
I gasped at the familiarity of the memory, the pounding inside my head increasing as more voices began to fill my head.
The walls had started to turn hazy, too many screams, shrieks, and whispers...It's too loud. I attempted to block my ears but nothing helped, the voices seemed to get louder and louder each second.
I breathed in a gush of air, trying to breath regularly, the voices were now replaced by a lullaby, soft and slow, but menacing and deadly to my ears. I screeched as black splotches began to fill my vision, and then, I was swallowed by the darkness.
~To be continued~
How was it? Probably starting from this chapter a lot of Utau's past would be revealed.
If you're wondering if Kukai knows that Utau is lying, I'll just say that Kukai is smarter than he acts. And the reason why Utau's collapsing so much? She's in an unstable condition, why? Well, you'll just have to find out!
Thank you all for the reviews and the long wait :)