7 years later…
It still amazed her how one small person could have enough energy to take on the world. From running, jumping, talking, kicking, screaming. Everything her son did brought a smile to her face. She had learned so much from being a parent. She didn't think it would ever be bad, but she never, ever expected things to be this good.
Being alone didn't bother her anymore. Her son was really all that she'd ever need.
At first, she remembered being so scared, putting herself down, scared that she'd never be the 'perfect' parent. Her son didn't care if she was perfect or not, he still seemed to love her all the same.
Sometimes, she found herself being caught up in the questions he asked. It started with who was his father, then furthered on to what he was like, why wasn't he here, why didn't he want to be his daddy. Sometimes, it was enough to make her cry, but she grew up. She couldn't cry over silly things anymore. The best she could do was be there for her son through everything, teach him right, try her best to be a mother and father figure at the same time.
Everyone had been so disappointed in her, put her down with every step she made. But she watched her son as she tucked him into bed, a smile on her face, and she was so lucky that she never listened to what any of those people said, because the life that she'd carried for nine months, raised for seven, was her life, and all of that pain she went through was so worth it.
He looked up at her, a smile gracing his thin lips. He looked nothing like his father, which she was thankful for.
"Mama," he began, a small smile on his face as he looked up at his mother in wonder. "What was he like?" It was a question he had asked so many times before, expecting an answer. But she couldn't give him one no matter how hard she tried to. Her past wouldn't be happy, nobody could un-break broken, it wouldn't happen.
A surge of memories ran through her head, and even though she tried to sort out the good, there were none. She hated lying to her son.
"You're sure?" he asked her with a smug smile on his face, his eyes staring into hers. She wasn't able to detect any emotion in them, and the smile that was set on his lips wasn't reaching his eyes, so she stood there, unsure of what to do or say.
She slowly nodded her head, keeping her fists balled up to her sides, her knuckles turning white. He moved closer, his tall figure towering over her frail one. He observed her in what looked like disgust before laughing in her face, his breath smelling of alcohol and his clothes smelling of cigarettes. She backed away from him, deciding that she was way too close and that he was very dangerous and very she was scared.
She didn't exactly know the purpose of why she came to confront him. Something had told her not to, but she felt as if he should know even though she knew that the fact that he had a baby would change nothing about his demeanor, wouldn't make her feel any less alone. She knew all of this very well, and she was stupid for coming.
She looked down as he continued to laugh in her face.
"What exactly did you expect, Kikyo?" he laughed again. "Did you really want to jump into my arms, declaring that you're pregnant with my child? Did you expect me to care? You're such a stupid girl, you know that?"
He had stopped laughing now, and in no way did he look amused. He was looking at her harshly now, his jaws tightening, teeth clenching, and suddenly, he was angry. He roughly jerked her arm towards him, anger swarming in his eyes. "You slut. You're such a fucking slut." He spat at her.
"It's your baby, Naraku." She spoke the truth, even though her voice shook.
It was the truth.
He looked at her incredulously for a moment before he slowly raised his hand. Kikyo closed her eyes, bracing herself for what she knew he was about to do. The slap rang through the air, and it was as if he'd knocked away all of her senses. She fell down, her hand immediately reaching up to cover the sting she felt on her cheek. She looked up at him, her eyes wide, and then she cried.
"I don't want to be alone." She told him although she knew she should have not said anything.
He walked over to her immediately, his lips twisted up into a snarl. "Fuck you. You have the fucking audacity to tell me that it's my baby? You're lying! Think of all those other guys that you've screwed. It's not me. You're on your own, slut." He spat at her.
She looked up at him, shaking her head as she looked into his eyes, realizing that he was nothing. But for a second, she was sure that she saw fear swimming around in those deep eyes of his, but she didn't care anymore. "You're right, I'm on my own."
She wasn't scared anymore as she watched him walk away.
She finally stood to her feet, placing a hand on very subtle bump that formed on her stomach. "I'll take care of you. I think I love you." She said to the life inside of her stomach. It was a promise.
That life inside of her, that life that she'd have to raise on her own with or without support, was hers and hers only. No one would raise it for her. He or she wouldn't have a father. Biologically, maybe, but not emotionally. She rubbed the tiny bump that would soon grow. And even though it hurt so much inside, even though she didn't particularly know if she was ready to handle such a big task, she loved him, or her. Whatever it was, she loved it with every inch of her soul for some fucking crazy reason.
Not because she wanted something or someone to love her, but because it was hers. Even though the father would never be present, even though she didn't love the father and he didn't love her, even though maybe all of this was an accident and he or she wasn't planned, she loved this thing that was growing inside of her. And it was crazy, but it was real and it was fucking true and she couldn't change anything.
She didn't know when she'd be able to smile again and be happy and be okay, but all she knew is that there was someone else to love, someone else to teach things to, teach how to laugh at lies, teach how to be happy, teach how life works, teach him or her everything, or at least try to.
She was ready for that.
End of flashback;
"Mama?" the tiny boy sat up in his bed to observe his mother, only to see that her eyes were indeed closed, that she was indeed crying, and he couldn't stand it. He wrapped two tiny arms around his mother's neck, closing his eyes as he pulled her close to him, trying to comfort her even though he knew well that he couldn't do much to make his mother feel better. But he couldn't stand it when she was crying, especially when he may have been the cause of it.
"Mama, please don't cry. I'm sorry," He told her sincerely, opening one eye only to see her still crying. Not being able to take the guilt that he felt anymore, he began to shed his own tears, still holding his mother close. He let out a sniff before his tiny, high-pitched voice spoke up again. "I won't ask again. I promise. Please, mommy, don't cry."
Kikyo finally opened her eyes, holding her son's head closer to her as his tears fell onto her shoulders. The familiar feeling of guilt racked through her body, and she couldn't stand the sight of him crying. "Shh, Ryuu, you did nothing wrong. I promise, baby. Lie back down."
He obeyed her, his dark eyes, just like hers, glistening with tears of guilt as he looked up at her. Her fingers entangled in his dark her, soothing him. "I love you, Ryuu. I love you, I really do, and I can't lie to you," she told him, her mind racing, trying to think of a way to make his father sound less dangerous, cold-hearted, but at the same time, she didn't want to sugar-code things. Her son deserved the truth, not lies. Her son deserved the best. She took a deep breath, deciding to let her heart speak for her, sure that he was now old enough to understand. "Daddy didn't love me. I didn't love daddy."
"Mommy, was I an accident? I heard that sometimes mommies give their babies up because they don't won't them. Did you ever want to give me up?" Ryuu asked, tears in his eyes once again. Kikyo continued to run her small fingers in his hair, shaking her head with a sad smile on her face.
"Mommy carried you in her stomach, every day, every night, for nine months. My belly got huge," she giggled, making gestures with her hands to earn a laugh out of him, "Baby, I love you, and I can't even think about what I'd do without you, what I'd do if I ever gave you up. You know that you mean the world to me. I love you so much," she put her forehead against his, listening to his breath. It was a gift. He was everything to her. "I was so young, and I wasn't sure of what to do. Your father…he wasn't the best person. He hurt me…really bad." She heard her son gasp, and she let out a small chuckle.
"I'm alright now, though. I'm here right now, and I'll be here for a long time." She assured him, and that seemed to calm him down.
"Daddy doesn't love me, does he?" He murmured, a frown on his face.
Kikyo frowned, too. "But it's impossible not to love you," She told him, and it was the truth. This caused a huge smile to break across his face, and he grinned up at her, admiration evident in his eyes. She leaned down to kiss his forehead. "I sure do love you, Ryuu," she giggled, trying to lighten the mood, even though this was one of those nights where she felt like crying. After all, she did every time he asked why he wasn't loved by his father. Kikyo wasn't sure why. How could anyone not be able to love him? He was beautiful, intelligent, everything she ever wanted and more. "I promise. I'll love you forever."
"I'll love you forever, too, mommy," he let out a yawn, closing his eyes as if he was finally at peace. "Can you tell me more about you and daddy another time, mommy?"
"Of course," Kikyo told him, trying to keep her voice from breaking. "Anytime, baby. Now get some sleep."
As soon as she was about to reach for the light that stood on the end table beside his bed, he spoke up again. "Mommy, I really don't think that daddy is that bad. Maybe he doesn't love me or know me that well, but I think I'll love him forever, too," he yawned again. "And by the way, mommy, it's impossible not to love you, too. Daddy must've been an idiot, but maybe he just deserves a chance."
And as soon as he said that, she couldn't stop the tears that slipped down her cheeks. She cut off the light and ran her fingers through his hair once again until she was sure he was sleep. She stood and wiped the tears away from her cheeks before leaning down to kiss him on his forehead once more. He stirred slightly in his sleep, then he settled down, his breathing was calm as if he knew everything in the world would be okay, as if he knew all of the answers. Her son was so smart.
No one would ever know of how proud she was of him, how he was her heart, how he was her everything and so much more.
There she was, lying beside of him, her eyes shut tight as sleep lulled her. Her breathing was calmer, and a small smile graced her full, pink lips as she slept, her cheeks flushed and her long, black and glossy hair spread out before her. She was lying on her side since she couldn't lie on her stomach anymore as she usually did. Her stomach had popped out way too much by now, making it nearly impossible to do anything, forming a huge bump.
She was eight months pregnant with their child, something that they'd created out of their love for each other. He smiled at the thought, smiled because he was lying next to the beautiful woman who was carrying his child. God, he loved her so much.
She was gorgeous, the moonlight shining down on her pale body as she slept soundlessly.
With a sly smile, he reached to touch her stomach, put his hand on it and really feel their baby, that life they'd created together, that life that they would raise together. The thought of it melted him from the inside-out, made everything have meaning again, brought on that familiar feeling that he'd felt ever since she set foot into his life; joy. He was so happy, happier than he'd ever been in his whole life.
He continued to rub his hand against her stomach, and suddenly he let out an inaudible gasp. He swear, he'd felt something inside of that huge, huge belly kick. It caused Kagome to stir in her sleep, and he didn't dare touch her, not wanting to wake her anymore than the kick had. She already wasn't sleeping well since it was going on month nine.
Finally, when she settled down, he reached to touch her stomach again, only to feel another kick. He smiled, wondering what she'd look like, his daughter. He wondered if she'd have her mother's beautiful chocolate eyes, or if she'd have his gold. He wondered if she'd have her mother's long, black tresses, or his silver. He smiled at the thought of his daughter looking just like her mother with her warm eyes and beautiful hair.
Then, he felt his daughter kick again, causing Kagome to groan slightly.
He leaned his head closer to her huge belly, a slight smile on his face. "I know you can hear me in there," he started. "We don't really have a name for you yet. Your mother wants to call you Akahana, but I'm not sure, you know? I was thinking of something like…Hina. Yeah, I like that name. Your mother, of course, doesn't agree though. But we never do, ne?" he spoke softly to the bump, sure that his breath was tickling Kagome's skin. But she never was a light sleeper. "Anyway, you really need to quiet down in there. You're safe, you know. Me and your mother love you so much, I promise you."
He paused, his hand rubbing against her stomach some more. The kicking settled down just a bit, and he heard Kagome sigh in her sleep as if she had relaxed. "That's it, Hina. Let your mother rest," he paused again, nuzzling his nose against her belly, and he let out a sigh. "I'm really scared, Hina. I'm scared that I won't be the best father for you. But I promise you that I'll try. I promise you that even though I can't see you, I can only feel, I still love you," he grinned when he saw Kagome's belly move, and he swore that he saw his baby's foot. "I'm going to be here for you whenever you need me, me and your mother. I imagine you to look just like her. Those warm eyes, that bright smile, that dark hair, and then, I know that I'll be in love all over again," he smiled again, closing his eyes in contempt at the image he was creating in his mind. "Goodnight, Hina. I love you, me and your mother. Don't forget that."
He placed a kiss on Kagome's stomach before he pulled away to look at her large belly, a smile on his face. Her belly button was sticking out, and she smelled strongly of cocoa butter. Every night and every morning, she bathed in the stuff, trying her best not to get any stretch marks. He smiled, rubbing her belly again before he moved back up to his pillow, only to see Kagome looking at him, her hand over her mouth in surprise, tears in her eyes. She scooted closer to him slowly. It was hard to even move with her belly as big as it was, but she lifted up and scooted towards him anyway.
"You heard all of that?" he asked her, a bright red blush staining his cheeks.
"All of it," she confirmed with a nod of her head.
"You know that I meant every bit of it, don't you?" he asked her, slight worry in his deep voice.
"Of course I do, Inuyasha. I know that you're going to be here no matter what," she shook her head and laughed at herself, wiping her tears away. "It's the baby doing this, you know. It's Akahana's fault. She's why I'm so emotional."
He growled, but still, couldn't help but smile. "Sure, blame it on Hina. You're just a wimp, wench. Admit it."
"It's Akahana," Kagome declared, a soft smile on her lips. "Maybe I am, but you're sweet, you know? I love you, Inuyasha." Her eyes were full of emotion, and suddenly the tears were rolling again.
"C'mon, Kagome, I didn't mean to make you cry."
"But sometimes, it's a good thing to cry, especially if you're crying over something good." She stopped talking when he leaned forward to kiss every single tear away before his lips captured hers.
"I love you, Higurashi," he told her the truth, and she turned away, scooting back up into him so his hands could rest over her sides since they couldn't wrap around her waist like they usually did. She was too pregnant. He rested a hand on her stomach, and smiled against her shoulder when he didn't feel anymore kicking. He thought to himself that maybe Hina had gotten tired, too.
"And I love you too, Taisho. Forever and more. Always," she whispered, relaxing as his hand continued to rub the bump on her stomach, lulling her into a deep, peaceful sleep.
A/N: *TEARS* Omigosh, I can't believe it's finally the end! I gotta admit, though, this was one of my favorite chapters. Kikyo's finally happy with her son, and Kagome and Inuyasha are happy with their little Akahana or Hina, I really don't know. I told you all, I'm horrible with names. Either way, I really hope you all enjoyed it. I've gotta get started fooling around with some new story ideas, because this definitely won't be the last time you'll be hearing from me! I guess I'll just get my best friend, Breanna, to help me come up with some new ideas, or you guys could PM me or something if you have a particular idea. Please don't be shy, I'm really excited to write, hell, I NEED to write more.
I wanted this to be short and sweet, hope you all didn't mind. I know Akahana and Hina are probably some horrible names, but that's Inuyasha and Kagome for you, though. They needed something to argue over, and I thought that it was pretty sweet for them to be arguing over the baby's name. Anyway, reviews are fucking love.
And once again, thank EVERYONE who reviewed this story and stuck with me from day one. You all know your names. Thank you guys so much, for all of the alerts, favorites, and reviews, because hell, I never thought I'd make it this far. I actually thought that I would end up deleting this story, but I just couldn't because you all loved it. I really can't say thank you enough. Hell, I'm tearing up right now. I could say thank you and thank you over and over again, but I'd be sitting here typing all night, and I have school tomorrow!
You all are amazing and beautiful though, and I never would have made it without you. Don't forget to leave me a comment and tell me what you think, you all's opinions mean the world to me. Thank you all for everything! I seriously can't thank ya'll enough! Love all you guys! Goodbye!(: