What is this…? I don't even…

Too much of a good thing isn't good, so I took a break from riding my Hilda bicycle to write a fic pairing two Pokémon. And I decided to choose two of my favorite fully evolved Ghost Pokémon: Mismagius and Banette! And the name for this shipping is something that made me smile: "TorturedSoulShipping"! Yeah, it doesn't sound all that happy, but considering these two entries in the Pokédex, it sounds like a good fit for them. The fic itself is short, though, so it's nothing to really mull over. (My last Poké relationship fic didn't go over well and resulted in me deleting it out of embarrassment…)

Disclaimer: I wish I did own the Pokémon series so I could claim the rights to the awesomely creepy Banette and Mismagius. But I don't, so any attempt to say I do will wind up with me being sued. I only own this fic.


How We Show Love


Love can take many forms. Upon leaving her family home to branch out and cause chaos in a town of her own, she realized that. Other Pokémon expressed their love in ways that were so different and bizarre to her. A Smeargle that drew a picture of its beloved Mienshao on a mountain. A Shuckle that made berry juice for a Paras. Even a Duskull and a Misdreavus like she had once been were exchanging lovesick looks over the energizing meal of a caught Slowpoke. She asked a couple of Pikachu who were wandering around her garden on a 'date' if their behavior was normal. It was. A moonlit stroll was only one of many ways a couple could show their feelings to each other. Not satisfied with the answer, she cursed the annoying rats with her favorite Perish Song, but wasn't happy at the sight of their twitching bodies slowly ceasing action.


Normal? It was completely and utterly abnormal to the Mismagius. Then again those in her family expressed love through pain. Her only example was her Mummy and Daddy: an aggressive Mismagius and an impish Banette. What 'normal' couples would call butterfly kisses, they called 'hammer kisses'. Because it involved her Mummy repeatedly hitting her Daddy in the head with a hammer while he possessed a doll. Not only did she work off the sexual tension, she managed to kill one of those annoying pink things, on account of the doll being a voodoo doll. All thanks to Daddy, of course. An excellent chaos-wreaking couple in her opinion…


"Will you shut up? I can't concentrate!" The Mismagius hissed with a slight blush, pausing in her task of creating a trio of dolls: all of Clefairies who normally came to the barren field in front of her dilapidated mansion to dance in the moonlight. At first, she humored the little pink nuisances who thought they could do magic with their little moon chants and dances, but in less than a week, the trio had earned her ire and three voodoo dolls created in their image. One of the Clefairy dolls suddenly floated up into the air.

"Hazel… Don't you wanna stab some pins into me?" The Clefairy doll spoke in a dark and hypnotic tone. "You know you want to hurt me. C'MON! Set me on fire! Dump me into a pot of oil! Feed me one of those poisonous chocolates you have left over from your attempt to poison that Milotic!"

The Mismagius named Hazel growled and ceased in her telekinetic weaving of the last doll. Her eyes glowed for a moment before a black shadow was forced out of the doll and she guided it back onto the worktable. The black shadow transformed into a Banette, pouting childishly. "You're so mean."

"I have to be in my line of work," Hazel said with a smirk. After all, you couldn't be too soft in the chaos-wreaking business. And where's the fun in doing evil deeds if you don't try your worst?

"I meant you're being mean to me! Hurry up with those dolls so we can get this started! I'm itching to do some cursing!"

"One of these days, you're going to be torn apart because of all the curses you do, dear Nero."

"I'd be happier if you were the one to tear me apart. Like right now!"

The Mismagius sighed. "Impatient as always…" Her eyes glowed and the dolls rose up into the air. Nero immediately appeared at her side and she began to chant ominously. About a thousand pins appeared up near the ceiling, made of an ethereal purple light. "Mmm…"

"Ohhhh, yeah…!" Nero floated over to the dolls and grinned wickedly. "Hit me, baby!"

Hazel's expression mirrored his own as her eyes glowed. The pins suddenly shot down, one by one piercing through the Banette's body, going in one way and sticking out another. By the time it was all done, Nero resembled the voodoo dolls he took after. The Marionette Pokémon's eyes glowed the same unsettling red shade as the Magical Pokémon's, a dark blue aura overcoming his body as he raised his arms in the air while his partner continued to chant at a quickened pace as a purple aura radiated from her.

Three large pins appeared over the dolls, glowing with a mixture of blue and purple energy. With one hand movement from the Banette and a final word from the Mismagius, the pins fell and pierced the through the dolls, followed by blood-curdling screams from outside of the mansion. The two Ghost types wore looks of satisfaction at the sound. Nero then quickly flew over to the window and stared down at the field a distance away while Hazel breathed softly, a rare blush appearing on her face. The Banette could vaguely make out the shape of a Vileplume in the field, probably devouring the Clefairy corpses.

"Man, Rafflesia sure does work fast…" Nero said with a smirk. "Heh-heh-heh-heh… Wonder how their Mommy will react when she learns her kids are plant food? Let's give her the treatment as well!"

"Alright… But first…" The Magical Pokémon spoke in a breathy voice as she narrowed her eyes at the living marionette. "Nero~?"

"Hm?" The Banette turned around in time to see a butcher's knife flying towards him. Rather than turn intangible and avoid getting hit, Nero remained solid and allowed the knife to cut off one of his arms.

Hazel floated nearby, her eyes glowing bright red while she breathed heavy. This feeling… The screams of the three Clefairy alone wasn't enough to satisfy her. "Now… Let's do it now!"

He looked down at the dismembered limb and smiled before picking it up. "In the mood now, are we? About time!" He said as he held up his arm.

"I want to hear you scream bloody murder!" Hazel said with a disturbing smile and a breathy voice as she used her telekinetic powers to take several decorative weapons off of the wall.

"YES! Bring it on! Bring on the pain!" Nero laughed maniacally before the weapons flew towards him.

Hazel smiled grimly as pieces of black cloth started to fly in the air, easily replaceable and repairable, while Nero screamed and wailed like a banshee. Now this was how you showed love.


Hazel's name comes from Witch Hazel. Nero is Roman for "black". Rafflesia is a sort of flower. Also, Vileplume is described as eating prey that's been affected by its poisonous powder in some Pokédex entries.

For some odd reason, when I thought of TorturedSoulShipping, I thought that it would make perfect sense to have one be a sadist and the other a masochist, and that their relationship only works because of their love for pain. Hence why this fic is kinda dark for my tastes, but that's how it turned out! (The things my mind comes up with sometimes…)