A/N: I hate these to and will try not to post unless important. Just wanted to let you know this is my first story and will probably be riddled with errors, till I can find a beta to take me on. Leave comments, I love to hear bad as much as good. But do try to be constructive if it is critisism. I don't mind hearing what I need to do, just no hate please.

Important information to help you follow along with my story...

***Starts when Edward arrives in Alaska. Will jump between times for first few chapters till everyone meets up but hopefully you can keep up. Let me know if it is a problem. Thanks, and Enjoy!

Stephenie Meyer owns Twilight and all of its Charcters.

Edward leaves Bella this starts from the time they reach Alaska...

EPOV

'Should have done this whe'n i told you in the begining, then you wouldn't have become so attached' Rose.

'Maybe he will come to his senses soon and realize you can't just leave your mate' Esme.

'Why are they so upset about a human girl anyways, it isn't like there isn't a million around' Tanya.

'Don't look, don't look, don't look, think of something else, anything else, don't look, don't look. This is so hard! Doesn't he realize she was my best friend, the visions hadn't changed last time I looked, I doubt it has now either. She will still become one of us' Alice.

'Why does my son have to be so dramatic. I worry every day I changed him to young. That he will never return to his mate. Maybe things would have been better if I had never changed him.' Carlisle.

'It was only a paper cut. I am the fucking God of War. How the hell did I lose so much control! Everyone is so pissed off at me, i don't know if they will ever get over this. Especialy Edward and Bella. Everytime they were close to one another there was such good feeling coming off them. Why did it have to be me, maybe if they ever listened to the damn human and never gave her a birthday party like she asked we wouldn't be in this sitiuation in the first damned place. I think i need to leave for awhile, go visit Peter and Char. Yeah that is the first fucking thought I've had thats sounded good to me since I've meet my pixie. I just gotta get outta here and get the hell away from all these emotions' Jasper.

'Why did we all have to leave. Don't get me wrong, I love Jasper as a bro and all but that was MY baby sister. I don't think we should do this. Its just wrong on so many levels. I shouldn't have followed I should go back and just give B a bit and let her change. Only problem is I have never done it before, I don't know if my control is good enough for that or not. Damn it! I need Rose, we got to get out of here for awhile and have some us time. She can get me to see what is right. Of course she never liked Bella much so I don't know if she will give me the best advice but I love and trust her. We can lay it all out together and come up with what is right.' Emmett.

'So much drama. How I wish they would just leave, go to their own fucking house and leave us be. They are some serioulsy depressing vibes in here. I knew I should have went hunting with everyone else.' Irena.

"AARRGGGG! No more, no more, shut up, just shut the hell up! I don't need your opinions, Bella was my Mate not yours, by law she will do as I SAY! We are not going back, She will not be changed, and Yes Jasper you are always bringing this family down. Why don't you just get the fuck out now! I don't need your damn pity, or your sympathies, or any damn thing else. I just need you guys to give me some space. I'm leaving, I'll be back in a few months or so. I'll call you ever so often and let you know I am okay." I roared at the whole lot of them. I don't need to hear their thoughts. I just need some time away from them all.

I didn't even go to my room. Just jumped into the Volvo and took off. I'm driving down the road and the only place I can think of to go is to check on Bella. I love that woman so damn much its pathetic really. I loved every minute of ever hour I have ever spent with her. I just think she would only resent me for the whole of her unlife. I wish I had stayed in Alaska that first day, or hell even tasting that glorious life inside of her.

Its been said it is better to have loved and lost than to never loved at all. I don't know who came up with that, but they just got that shit totally wrong! I wish I had never met Isabella Swan. She is the disguise of the devil, the broken to my heart, the lost of my love, she is every damn unthinkable thing I could have ever imagined. How could I have let things get so far? I knew, I knew, she would be better off without me in her life. First, James comes and takes a literal bite out of her, then my own brother tries! He should have never came to live with us in the first place. We only ever wanted Alice, of course if we didn't let him stay she wouldn't have either. Maybe when I have had some time and return, him and Ali will have broken apart. Surely if I can leave my mate, Ali can leave hers for the greater good of our family.

Brown dirt, deep brown eyes, blue birds, blue dresses, fallen logs, fallen Bellas. Grr... Why can't I get her off my mind. I need to get farther away or I will break my own rules and run right back to her. I will never forget how beautiful she looked in that prom dress, I can only dream of what she will look like one of these days in a wedding gown. I can't take it, I rip off the door to my volvo and run. I just need to run, perhaps a good meal will make me forget about her, at least for a few moments. Trees are splintered as I run by smashing my fists into them, and birds and other creatures fly away, run, or grow completely quiet. They know what is near. Why couldn't Bella have that same sense of predator near. That same sense to know she should run from danger, not directly to it. I slow down to a jog and sit. And sit, and sit shadows grow and disappear, then change directions, then disappear. I don't know how long I have sat here. But I do smell something near. I jump up and proceed to the grizzly bear about a mile south. I run, when I get there I am absolutley famished, I am dirty and wet. I don't know when it snowed but apparently while I sat it snowed and melted.

I crouch down low and pace around the bear, it gets agitated, me being in its personal space, I can smell why, a cub is nearby. I leave her alone. Carslile is always going on about the circle of life. To leave mothers and babies be. But I literally can't stop myself. I am to hungry, when I happen upon the cub, I hear its cries for its mother, but the innocent life I am now sucking down my throat is jsut to sweet. The mother charges at me, knowing she can never save her cub or herself. Even still she swats at me, and I can't help but to smack back at her. She is pissing me off. As the last of the cubs blood pumps into me, I throw it down and turn to the very large pissed off momma. I play with her, she swatts I punch. I can hear her bones crumble underneath her thick pelt. She is so angry, her adrenaline is pumping at its hardest, so I pounce.

After a few more kills I decide I will go to Russia. There is much wildlife and forest there, and few people. Perhaps being a nomad in the wilderness for awhile is just what i need. No unwanted thoughts to fill my mind with torture just me, myself and I for awhile. I just need quiet. Maybe after Bella is dead I can return to my family. I do not think I can before then, knowing they all love her perhaps as much as I do. For I would surely run straight back to her if there was any influence around me at all.

Don't forget to click that oh, so very important button down here. I need feed back so I know you all are enjoying..