Child of the Godslayers
Chapter 1: Beneath the Mountain (Sam's POV)
Takes place after Session 4's "Beneath the Surface" and before "Point of No Return"
Not many people win arguments against Janet Fraiser. Don't let the size fool you, she's a formidable woman. Then add in the white lab coat, a tray of needle's and the words, "doctors orders" and even the bravest or highest ranking officers bow to her will. We may be the same rank, but I was also her best friend, and this was one argument I was sure I had won.
That's why I was so shocked when at the end of the briefing she looked right at General Hammond and said, "I cannot in good conscious clear Sam for this mission."
The whole briefing room, myself included, stared at her in open mouthed shock.
"What's wrong with Sam?" Daniel asked concern choking the sweet man's voice.
Janet, bless her soul, shook her head, "Doctor patient confidentiality," she replied.
"That doesn't apply to places where most medical problems involve alien virus, tiny robots, or alien devices," The Colonel replied drily. It didn't escape my notice that he was using the same kind of humor he used when he was getting tortured. The man got funnier the more miserable he was.
"Oh, this isn't gate related," Janet assured him. Then she gave me a quick glance. I tried not to think about the answer to her unanswered question, in case the Colonel was right and she really could read minds. No, no alien virus, or technology, but it would be a lie to say it was completely un-gate related. Then again, pretty much nothing that had occurred during the last four years of my life could be considered completely un-gate related.
Daniel's gorgeous blue eyes focused on me, "What's wrong Sam?" he asked.
Jack's deep brown eyes were focused on me too. Someone who didn't know these two like I did would have assumed Daniel was the most worried. But I wasn't fooled. Daniel was worried. Jack was terrified. Teal'C rose and stood behind me like a guard. Dammit, I didn't mean to make these men worry.
"Nothing is wrong with her," Janet tried to pacify them, but it wasn't working.
"Will she be ready to resume her duties soon?" The General asked, and his concern touched me to. All this wasted concern, because Janet couldn't keep her trap shut.
"'Fraid not General," Janet said averting her eyes.
I couldn't let them keep worry like this.
"I'm pregnant" I announced focusing on my lap. The silence in the room finally forced me to look up. First into Janet's hazel eyes full of pride. Then Daniel's shocked blue eyes. Then the big Jaffa's eyes overflowing with joy hid behind his normal stoicism. Then to the general's rather flabbergasted eyes, and last of all to Jack's. I was afraid of this, the Colonel's eyes were busy sending mine ten thousand messages all at once. Times like this I wished the Colonel was as dumb as he pretended to be.
"Carter," he said, but he couldn't form more words after that.
"Congratulations Sam," Daniel said enthusiastically.
"I believe you shall make a wonderful mother," Teal'C said placing one large hand on my shoulder.
"Carter," The Colonel tried again, but his mouth still wasn't receiving messages from his brain.
"Well, this is certainly a pleasant surprise," General Hammond said looking very grandfatherly, "You are off active duty of course, and watch what you work on in the lab."
"No radioactive doohickeys, Carter," The Colonel had found his voice at last.
"Understood Sir," I said, "Good luck on your mission."
When Janet got back to her office I was sitting in ambush in her own chair.
"Sam, I'm sorry, I just couldn't let you go through the gate. I had to protect the baby. Even peaceful missions can turn violent, and we don't know what effect gate travel has on pregnant women."
I sighed, "I know Janet, you did the right thing. I just don't know what I'm going to do for the next eight months."
"Oh please Sam, you do more than a full time job in your lab plus your missions through the gate. We'll be lucky if you settle down to forty hours a week for the pregnancy. I don't think me telling you to rest will do much good, but rest assured I'll do it anyway." She paused and looked at me, "You did the right thing telling them."
"Well, I couldn't let them all worry about me, when there was nothing to worry about!"
"So Sam," she said going from doctor to friend in 2.8 seconds, "I didn't get a chance to ask you before about the Father."
"It's complicated Janet," I said, hoping she would drop it, but knowing she wouldn't. Like I said before she is a formidable woman.
"Human or alien complicated?" she asked.
"Human," I replied.
"Earth or alien planet complicated."
Here I faltered.
"Let's see, three and a half weeks ago…you were stranded under P3R-118 with your memories erased," suddenly a wide grin threatened to break her face in half, "Jack's baby!" she squealed like a twelve year girl playing truth or dare at a sleepover.
"Janet, we weren't really us. We were Jonah and Thera, trying to save our planet from freezing to death. We were Jonah and Thera, with no military regs to keep us apart."
"Oh Sam," Janet says, "I don't care how you rationalize it. That baby is still yours and Jacks. A result of a love so strong it survived years of being ignored, and a memory stamp which made you forget everything else! I'm telling you it's Jack's baby!"
I caught her grin like the alien virus she spent all too much time fighting, "Jacks baby," I repeated loving the sound of the words. I placed my hand over my still flat belly, "It's Jack's, and MINE." Then my grin faded, "Janet, it's still complicated."
Her grin evaporated too, "He's your CO," she muttered sitting next to me.
"You can't tell anyone, not even Jack. We'd both get court marshaled. Who knows what would happened to SG-1. It would never be the same."
"Sam, SG-1 will never be the same anyway. You will be gone for the better part of a year Sam."
I sighed, "I know, I can't even start thinking that far into the future." I'd only known about the kid for a few hours. The knowledge of my impending motherhood still hadn't filtered through all of my thoughts changing the way I looked at the world. "I know it's going to be hard to be away from the gate that long. But it's going to be hard to come back. To leave my baby with someone else for—for days Janet!"
"So maybe Sam, You won't come back. Maybe you get a desk job and a happily ever after with a certain Colonel."
I stared at her as if she'd just grown a third head. One of the few strange things I'd yet to see since coming to the SGC.
She laughed, "Or you can be superwomen and be it all: scientist, warrior, mother, and wife. If anyone can do it you can."
"Janet," I said, pretending not to like her teasing, but loving it all the while, "I guess I better go get started at my new desk job."
As I got up to go, she grabbed my elbow, "If you ever need anything Sam, anything. You let me know," I nodded, "And that includes unlimited free babysitting when off world," she added.
Walking through the corridors I could tell the gossip mill was still quite about this new development. I was grateful that I would have a few days to adjust before the rest of the base began adjusting as well.
I wasn't really surprised to find the Colonel sitting on my desk when I entered my office. The yoyo he was playing with hit the floor when he saw me come in, "Carter…" he said. So his voice still wasn't working. Maybe I was wrong, I dared to hope. Maybe he didn't know, and was jealous of some imaginary boyfriend. I should probably start inventing one now.
"Excuse me Sir, I have a lot of work to do." I said walking over to my lab bench and the piece of technology that sat there. A piece of technology I'd figured out this morning, but the Colonel didn't have to know that.
"Oh, I think you can spare a second to talk to the father of your baby," he said casually. My eyes widened with horror as I rushed over to shut the door.
"How did you know?" I asked. Glad the cameras in my lab had no sound.
"Oh, I may be no astrophysicist, but even dumb old Colonels can count back a few weeks."
"I never thought you were dumb."
He grinned, and beckoned me near him with his finger, "Cameras," I reminded him just in case, but his only intention was to put his hand on my stomach, protectively, territorially, just as I had not a fifteen minutes before.
"Carter, you are going to take it easy?" I nodded, "And eat more than jello?" I giggled. "And Fraiser gave you vitamins right? You should have vitamins."
"I've got it covered." I said reassurely as he lifted his hand from my stomach. I found myself wanting it back there.
"You know I have done this before," he said.
I raised my eyebrow at him.
"Ok, so Sara did this before, but I was…you know there, Sam."
"Yes, Sir." I said. All the happiness vanished from his eyes. Funny how one word can change everything.
"It's my kid," he said sadly.
"I know," I said biting my lip to keep another painful "Sir" from slipping out and hurting him, "I'm not shutting you out," I said carefully touching his arm, aware of the electricity that shot through my body with the touch. That was new, this feeling when we touched had begun as our memories returned. Some remnant of Thera and Jonah left over torment Sam and Jack.
"I'm going to resign," he said firmly.
"No," I said more firmly, "If you did that, and the world was in trouble because of it, I couldn't live with that kind of guilt, Sir. I don't want happiness that costs so much."
"Carter, we've saved the earth how many times? Don't they owe us something by now?"
"Sir…" I began, but he cut me off.
"Dammit Carter, call me Jack when we're out of earshot of the military at least. We're having a kid together for God's sake."
"Ok, Jack," man that word felt good on my lips, "Then you've got to cut out the 'Carter's."
"It's a deal, Samantha," Oh, and that sounded good coming from him too. He raised hand like it was going to touch my cheek.
"Cameras Jack." I reminded him just in time.
"Let's go somewhere without Cameras, Sammy," he said.
I wanted to obey, but instead I glanced at my watch, "You go off world in an hour."
"Ok, we'll talk when I get back," he said.
"Just don't make any career or life altering decisions until then," I warned.
"You either," he said, and I remembered why I'd stopped looking into the Colonel's deep brown eyes. That was always dangerous.
He broke the moment by opening the door. I switched from Samantha to Carter, "Have a good trip, Sir."
"Take care of yourself, Carter." They were casual words we'd said to each other a million times, meaning nothing. But now they were full of meaning.
A little later Daniel walked into my office already geared for the trip save his heavy pack.
"Wow Sam!" He grinned.
I tried to smile back at him, but I was feeling a little overwhelmed. I'd told Jack I had it covered, but really when it came to motherhood I was pretty clueless.
Daniel's voice changed, catching on to my mood, "So how do you feel about all of this?"
"Honestly? I feel a lot of things. I'm going to hate being away from the gate for months. I'm going to hate going through it and leaving a baby behind. I'm excited to be a mother, but I don't have a clue what I'm doing. And I'm scared to do it."
I'd meant to stop there, but Daniel added the word, "alone?"
I shrugged. I didn't know how to answer that. Truth was, despite what Jack wanted, I wasn't sure how involved he would be.
"Look Sam," Daniel said, "I don't know where you stand with the father. But you have to know you will never be alone in this. Me, Jack, Teal'C, General Hammond, and Janet, we're here for you. We will help you. This kid, is going to be loved no matter what."
"I know Daniel, but at the end of the day this kid is still mine," I added in my head mine and Jack's.
"So what is the situation with the father?" he asked. "I didn't even know you were dating someone."
Oh that I'd had time to develop a good cover story before Daniel started asking questions. Those blue eyes are pretty good at seeing through lies.
"It's complicated. We'd already decided things weren't going to work out, even if we wanted them to."
"Well, even so, he might want a chance to be a father."
"Oh, no question he wants it, but I don't know if he'll be able to," whoops that was more honest then intended. I'd succeed in really confusing Daniel.
"Oh no!" I suddenly exclaimed.
"What?" Daniel said with all the concern he'd worn at the briefing times ten.
"I'm going to have to explain this to my dad, and when I do he'll insist of knowing the name of the father."
"So?" Daniel said.
"I can't tell him!"
"Why not?" Daniel asked growing more confused, and perhaps a bit suspicious.
"I have to protect him."
"I don't think Jacob would hurt the guy just because," then suddenly Daniel's eyes filled with rage, "Unless, did he hurt you Sam?"
"God no Daniel," I shut my eyes. I'd have to tell Daniel something, and it might as well be the truth. He'd have to find out the truth eventually anyway. After all SG-1 was family. I took a deep breath, "If I told you about my breaking the rules would you feel the need to report it to Hammond?"
Those moral eyes locked onto mine, "Not if you weren't hurting anyone Sam."
"Ok, so that is where you and my father differ."
I was about to finish telling him. But the man is a genius. "Sam," he said grinning ear to ear, "How long have you two been together? I can't BELIEVE I didn't see it. I can't believe Jack didn't tell me. I can't believe you didn't tell me. Does Teal'C know? Does Janet? Oh my gosh, Jack is a father again. And you and Jack. You are so right for each other. This is good Sam. So how long?"
The man had energy. Much like Jack's actually. Except Daniel's energy all left through his mouth and super expressive eyes, whereas, Jack's most left through fingers fidgeting with everything in sight. A memory of the amazing way it had felt to have Jack fidget with my fingers came to mind. I pushed it away, so not the time.
"Well, it lasted about as long as he called me Thera."
Daniel plopped into a chair, "God Sam, so you and Jack were never really together?"
"Oh, we were together, just with altered memories. Memories that didn't include military ranks."
"But you are together now Sam? You've talked about it? Does he even know? Should I go get him?"
I smiled as Daniel made a move toward the door. "He knows, and we've talked some. We made a plan to talk more. We have some thinking to do. This isn't the kind of thing you figure out in a half hour conversation Daniel."
"But you're together right?"
"We don't have that figured out yet, Daniel," I said knowing it was not the answer he wanted to hear.
Jack's annoyed voice came over the intercom, "Attention wayward anthropologists put down that old rock you are staring at and get your butt to the control room!"
I laughed, "I've never been referred to as an old rock before."
Daniel made no motion to obey Jack's orders. "Sam, let Jack do the right thing. He's a good guy. He deserves it. You deserve it too."
"Thanks Daniel," I said.
"You're going to be alright Sam?" He asked touching my cheek, just like Jack had almost done before I stopped him, except with Daniel, there was no electricity, no meaning, it was just a comforting touch.
"I've been talking care of myself for years, Daniel."
"Even strong people need comfort sometimes Sam," he said giving me a quick hug.
I walked with him down to the gate room. When Jack saw me walk in with Daniel he cringed.
"Sorry, I didn't know you two were talking," he said apologetically
"It's FINE, Sir," I said meaning, I'm fine Jack.
"Yeah, I was late," Daniel offered.
I watched my teammates go through the gate without me. It left a cool pain in the pit of my stomach. Might as well get used to it, I thought to myself.
"Sir," I said to General Hammond, "I'd like to send a message to my father."
He started looking all grandfatherly again, "What would you like it to say Major?"
"Just that he should come as soon as he can. I think this is something best told in person."
"Of course Major," he said. Then he grinned, "Congratulations."