Disclaimer: If I owned FFXII and CG, I'd be very happy indeed.

Yo! Zephyr here! I've officially lost my mind. Code Geass and Final Fantasy XII in the same story? What am I thinking? I'm not entirely sure at this point, but I think this is going to be an amusing story. There's a bit of OOC-ness for the FF characters, especially Balthier. I tried to write him as the kind of snarky character that he is, but he kinda turned out to be kinda sorta like Lloyd...ah well. I'm quite pleased with how this turned out, so let's let the deadly tale begin!

"Why don't you just go get Balthier already?"

Vaan didn't look away from the map in front of him, his eyes scanning across the names in Ivalice. The sky pirates were attempting to make their return to Rabanastre from Bhujerba, but things weren't exactly going according to plan. It was a fairly simple flight from Bhujerba to Rabanastre, but apparently not for the young sky pirate. As much as Vaan hated to admit it, he could only conclude one thing.

They were lost.

"You know I can't get Balthier, Penelo." Vaan said, his finger tracing the most obvious route from Bhujerba to Rabanastre.

"Why's that?" Penelo leaned back in her seat.

"Because he's in his room with Fran." Vaan replied.

"And your point is?" Penelo raised an eyebrow.

"Well, I'm not about to interrupt them when they're having sex, now am I?" Vaan finally looked up at Penelo.

"Who says they're having sex?" Penelo questioned.

"You clearly don't know Balthier, do you?" Vaan shook his head.

"Just because they're alone together doesn't mean that-" Penelo started to say.

"I'm still not getting him." Vaan interrupted. "He's going to kill me."

"Why's he going to kill you, Vaan?" Penelo sighed, knowing that Vaan had a tendency to overreact.

"Because I don't know where we are." Vaan admitted sheepishly.

"I know that, but that doesn't mean that he's going to kill you." Penelo said.

"If we don't know where we are, then we don't know what could happen to the airship." Vaan explained. "And you know how paranoid he is over the Strahl."

"I'm well aware of that, but that doesn't mean-" Penelo tried to say.

"You're lost, aren't you?"

Vaan and Penelo turned around to find Balthier walking onto the bridge, his eyes traveling from Vaan to the endless sky in front of them.

"No?" Vaan tried to sound like he knew what he was doing.

"Let me see the map." Balthier was all too familiar with how Vaan piloted his airship and could usually find out where they were. "I swear, Vaan, you're going to need a better sense of direction if you're ever going to have your own airship."

"Yeah, yeah." Vaan rolled his eyes.

Balthier took the map from Vaan's hands and spent a few seconds examining it. Frowning, he squinted at the map before turning it sideways to the right, then upside-down.

"Um, Balthier?" Penelo wasn't sure what to make of Balthier's strange behaviour. "What exactly are you doing?"

"Trying to find out where we are." Balthier responded.

"So we're really lost?" Vaan sighed.

"Even I can't figure out where we are." Balthier shook his head. "Just what exactly were you doing when you were meant to be navigating, Vaan?"

"I was navigating!" Vaan exclaimed.

"Oh really?" Balthier raised an eyebrow.

"Yes!" Vaan shot a glare in the direction of the elder sky pirate.

"Let's just land somewhere so we can find out where we are." Balthier pinched the bridge of his nose in annoyance. "Maybe we aren't as lost as I think we are."


"Cécile-kun, how's the frame coming?"

Lloyd walked into the computer room where he found Cécile staring at a computer monitor in front of her. She was working on determining the cause of the strange power fluctuations in the Lancelot and it was proving to be more difficult than they thought.

"Now it's not turning on at all, even when it's plugged in." Cécile shook her head as she stared out the window into the testing room. "I have Suzaku in there now, but he says that nothing's happening."

"Interesting." Lloyd set down his pudding cup and grabbed a headset before saying, "You can come out, Kururugi-kun. I don't think we need you in there any more."

After a few seconds, the Lancelot opened up to show Suzaku climbing out and jumping down to the floor before walking out of the room.

"This is very unusual." Lloyd retrieved his pudding and was now stirring it with a spoon.

"I have absolutely no idea what's been causing it." Cécile sighed. "And with Suzaku's Lancelot malfunctioning, we can't send him into battle. What happens if Zero shows up?"

"He'll just have to use one of the older models." Lloyd said with a shrug.

A few seconds later, Suzaku walked into the room, looking very confused about something.

"What's wrong, Suzaku?" Cécile frowned.

"Sensei, Milly just called and said that a strange plane just landed at Ashford." Suzaku reported.

"Sounds interesting!" Lloyd exclaimed. "Time for a field trip!"

"Wait, what?" Cécile was used to Lloyd's strange behaviour, but this was a little abnormal, even for him.

"I want to go see what it is." Lloyd nodded. "And it's not like we can do anything else here."

"We can figure out what went wrong with the Lancelot." Cécile said like her suggestion was brutally obvious.

"But this seems like more fun." Lloyd said as he dashed out of the room.

Suzaku stared after the scientist and said, "I guess we'd better follow him."

"Good idea." Cécile nodded. "We don't exactly want him destroying something."


"No, the Paramina Rift is here! Right next Mt Bur-Omisace!"

Vaan and Balthier were in the kitchen, the map of Ivalice spread out before them. Vaan kept trying to say that they were near the Paramina Rift, but the lack of snow and mountains seemed to disprove his claim.

"Then what about the Phon Coast?" Vaan suggested.

"Use your head, Vaan." Balthier sighed in annoyance. "Do you see any beaches around?"

"That doesn't mean anything!" Vaan exclaimed.

"Of course it does!" Balthier snapped. "How can we possibly be near the Phon Coast when there isn't a body of water in sight?"

"Well, what about the Westersand?" Vaan said.

"If we're not near Rabanastre, there's no way that we're near the Westersand." Balthier retorted.

"How about the Tomb of Raithwall?" Vaan wondered.

"Nope." Balthier shook his head. "I don't see any giant structures in sand."

"Okay, where do you think we are?" Vaan crossed his arms angrily in front of his chest and glared at the elder sky pirate.

"I have no clue where we are." Balthier shook his head. "I don't know how you managed to get us this lost."

"This is why you shouldn't let me navigate!" Vaan exclaimed in protest.

"You'll never be a sky pirate if you can't even fly an airship, Vaan." Balthier said.

"Yeah, yeah. I hear you." Vaan rolled his eyes.

"Any progress?" Penelo came in to make sure that Vaan and Balthier weren't strangling each other in frustration.

"What does it look like?" Vaan said.

"Well, Fran thinks that it would be a good idea if we went outside to see where we are." Penelo said.

"That works for me." Balthier shrugged as he and Vaan followed Penelo out of the kitchen.

"So what exactly were you doing that you couldn't navigate the Strahl yourself?" Vaan looked up at the elder sky pirate.

"I was alone with Fran." Balthier responded.

"I knew it." Vaan said.

"Get your mind out of the gutter, Vaan." Balthier smacked the boy in the back of the head. "You have Penelo for that."

"He has me for what now?" Penelo looked back to the two sky pirates.

"Nothing!" Vaan exclaimed.


"So why exactly are we here?"

Suzaku glanced sideways at Milly to make sure that she had heard his question. Both students were watching Lloyd examine the exterior of the unusual plane that had landed on the Ashford Academy grounds while Cécile watched nearby to make sure that the scientist didn't run off with it. Knowing Lloyd, he would attempt to get the plane back to the lab so he could examine it more closely.

"I didn't expect you to tell him about it." Milly shook her head. "You know how he can be."

"I thought he'd want you to take pictures." Suzaku said as he watched Lloyd dart around the gargantuan plane. "I didn't think he'd want to actually come here."

"You should have known that this would happen." Milly said with a nod. "I wonder if he's going to notice the people that were on the plane, though."

Suzaku's eyes travelled over to the group of people standing near the plane. The two men were bickering while the smaller woman was trying to break them up. What Suzaku found the most unusual was that the other woman was wearing what appeared to be bunny ears.

"I wonder of those are real." Milly said, more to herself than to Suzaku.

"The ears?" Suzaku looked back to Milly to find that she was walking across the yard and over to the group of people. "Milly!"

Suzaku dashed after her, reaching the group just as the shorter man started laughing at the girl with rabbit ears.

"Stop being rude, Vaan." The girl with blonde braids said as she smacked the man upside the head.

"I can assure you that they're real." The taller man told Milly with a slight smirk.

"I wonder why you'd know that." The man named Vaan grinned at the taller man.

"Balthier…" the rabbit girl glanced at him.

"Yes, Fran?" the man called Balthier looked towards the girl.

"What is going on?" Cécile asked as she joined the group.

"Who exactly are you people?" Milly asked.

"I'm Vaan." Vaan introduced himself. "These are Penelo, Fran and Balthier."

"And why are you here?" Milly demanded.

"We kind of got lost flying back to Rabanastre." Vaan admitted sheepishly.

"You mean you got us lost." Balthier said, his eyes glancing towards the plane.

"Shut up, Balthier." Vaan snapped.

"Wait a minute." Cécile frowned. "What is Rabanastre?"

"It's our home." Vaan replied.

"Is it in Area 11?" Suzaku asked, speaking for the first time since he joined the group.

"Is that code for Ivalice?" Vaan asked. "Or Dalmasca?"

"Vaan, you've really done it this time." Balthier sighed.

"There's no Area 11 where we are from." Fran explained to a very confused Cécile.

"And we don't know of any Rabanastre or Ivalice or Dalmasca." Suzaku shook his head.

"Could they be from a different planet?" Milly wondered allowed.

"They look human enough." Cécile said slowly.

"With the exception of Fran, we're all human." Penelo said. "And she can pass easily enough."

"Maybe where you're from, but not around here." Suzaku shook his head.

"We just need to hide her from Lloyd…" Milly said slowly.

"Wait, who's Lloyd?" Vaan raised an eyebrow.

"Good point, Milly." Cécile nodded in agreement. "He'll annoy her to the point of no return."

"This doesn't sound good." Balthier said, his eyes moving to Fran. "By the way, when do I get to take my airship back?"

"Your airship?" Suzaku frowned.

"Yes, the thing that is currently sitting on the lawn?" Balthier phrased his response as a question as he gestured towards the Strahl.

"What exactly is it?" Milly asked.

"It's my airship." Balthier said, his eyes glancing back to the Strahl. "She is one of the fastest in Ivalice."

"We just can't let Vaan pilot it anymore." Penelo said.

"That's enough out of you, Penelo." Vaan glared at the girl.

"So when can we leave?" Balthier was clearly growing more impatient by the minute.

"You should probably find out how to get home first." Cécile suggested. "Shouldn't you do that while you're on the ground?"

"I suppose that makes a little sense." Balthier said with a shrug.

"Oh Cécile-kun!" came a loud voice from the plane.

"Oh no." Suzaku and Cécile said at the same time.

"It looks like there's a cannon-" Lloyd started to say.

"Get away from my airship!" Balthier shouted before he darted back to the Strahl.

"Stop, Balthier!" Fran yelled as she ran after him, knowing full well what could happen.

Milly, Cécile and Suzaku simply watched as Balthier tackled Lloyd to the ground and attempted to pull a screwdriver from the scientist's hand. They knew that Lloyd didn't always think things through, but they had no clue how Balthier would react to his actions.

"Balthier's very fond of his airship." Penelo explained.

"I'll go stop him." Suzaku sighed before he made his way over to where Fran was attempting to pull Balthier off of Lloyd.

"Lloyd tends to get this way with anything technical or mechanical." Milly told Vaan and Penelo.

"They'd probably get along if Balthier ever decides to release his death-grip on Lloyd's neck." Vaan winced as Balthier wrapped his arm around Lloyd's neck. "That looks like it hurts."

"Lloyd's going to be complaining for days." Cécile said with a sigh.

It took a lot of convincing to assure Balthier that Lloyd wasn't going to dismantle his airship. Lloyd didn't help matters, especially when he picked up the flamethrower and accidentally pointed it at the Strahl.

"Let's get back to the lab so we can use the equipment there." Lloyd said. "We can figure out where they came from and how they got here."

"How are we going to get the Strahl to the lab?" Balthier asked.

"We could always fly it over." Cécile suggested. "Suzaku can go with you so you can know where you're going and Lloyd and I can return by car."

"But why can't I go in the airship?" Lloyd whined.

"Because Balthier's already in a bad enough mood." Cécile said, glancing towards the elder sky pirate, who still had his eyes on his airship. "You'll pester him too much."

"Sounds like a plan." Vaan nodded.

"I won't try to do anything weird, I promise." Suzaku said, sensing that Balthier was still a little hesitant to let him on the ship.

"Do I get to come?" Milly asked hopefully.

"You have school, my dear." Lloyd responded before walking back to the van.

"I guess that's a no." Milly said sadly as she walked back to the Ashford Academy campus.

"We'll meet you back in the lab, Suzaku." Cécile said. "Just have them land it on the abandoned lot next to the lab."

"Got it." Suzaku said. "I'll see you guys soon."

"You'd better know where you're going." Balthier said as they boarded the Strahl. "I don't need to get lost a second time today."

"I know where I'm going, I assure you." Suzaku nodded confidently.

Back in the van, Lloyd was staring longingly at the airship as it took to the skies and flew off towards the lab.

"You'll see it soon, Lloyd." Cécile said as she turned the keys in the ignition.

"I know." Lloyd sighed. "I just wish I could be flying it."

I can just imagine Balthier tackling Lloyd. Knowing Balthier, he'd probably enjoy it. Silly whore boy. So that's chapter one! I only plan on writing another chapter before ending it and I hope I'll have it up soon. The next two weeks are midterms weeks and I have papers galore plus a speech that I need to finish the outline for...That being said, I'd love to hear some reviews and opinions. No flames, as they will only be ignored. I do like constructive criticism, though.

Next chapter: let's count the ways that Lloyd can annoy Balthier in the span of five minutes!