Alright, so we've finally reached the end. Last chapter, folks.
Hope you enjoy!
He remembered being raped by Deidara when he was eight, being found by a nice man named Kakashi two years later. Sasuke worked under his rescuer in the group titled Team 7, where he befriended Naruto Uzumaki and Sakura Haruno. He remembered betraying them, escaping to the Sound Village to train under the instruction of the snake Orochimaru, all for the sake of gaining power.
He remembered Itachi killing his parents.
That had been Sasuke's entire reason for gaining power, the reason for his very existence.
Distantly, Sasuke also remembered his abusive father, and negligent mother, but his heart held little bitterness for them. It had been fair judgment cast upon him. He wasn't good enough, wasn't strong enough, and was punished for it.
And besides, it wasn't just them Itachi had killed. It was the entire clan.
And Sasuke was next.
Sasuke ignored the desperate plea, barely dodging a tree before speeding through the overgrown grass. Was this why Itachi had chosen such a solitary, quiet area to call their home? So nobody could hear Sasuke's screams?
Sasuke grit his teeth, fighting to ignore the blurred vision he was now attributing to unbearable heartache. Itachi had betrayed him, betrayed his clan.
Sasuke strained his body to the limit as he flew passed the trees and numerous obstacles in his path. The usual, grueling training Sasuke used to endure with Orochimaru had vanished after the memory wipe out, and his strength and endurance had been deduced to nearly nothing. If he were any average ANBU ninja, his current agile and nimble movements would praised, considered to be remarkable, exceptional, extraordinary. All things Sasuke knew he was.
One thing he also knew was that he was far superior to any ANBU. And so was Itachi.
Sasuke cursed himself as he moved, his limbs feeling so sluggish he thought he was going to be sick. He couldn't move to his full speed; did that mean Itachi would catch up to him?
He received his answer soon enough when something fierce slammed into his back, the heavy body plummeting Sasuke to the floor. He managed to lessen the blow by throwing his hands in front of him, ignoring the ache of the scars on his palms when it meshed painfully with the mossy rocks and broken tree limbs.
Itachi hit the ground not a moment after, allowing half his body to fall beside Sasuke instead of on top. The other half kept itself entangled with Sasuke's own, leaving the boy immobile.
Sasuke fought frantically against the confining limbs, and Itachi consequently strengthened his hold, bringing his other arm in for reinforcements. "Sasuke, stop, please let me explain," he entreated, grunting when Sasuke's elbow found its way to his stomach. He wheezed, but ignored the pain and focused on keeping his nearly indestructible grip intact. Itachi's victory had already been ensured.
He wasn't losing Sasuke again.
After constant battles, Sasuke's energy was soon depleted. He lay there, panting, wrapped up in Itachi's resilient hold. He wanted to believe the touch repulsed him, that he felt disgusted by so much as touching the murderer of his family, but he couldn't. It felt like he had grown an extra layer of skin, thick and protective.
But the man still killed his clan.
"I get it," he finally spat between gasps, eyes narrowed and gaze lowered. "You win. Now hurry up and finish this." He snorted. "Unless, of course, you want to fuck me first." That was the brutal truth. So many people in Sasuke's life wanted to fuck him deep into the mattress, or just the next available stable surface, and Sasuke couldn't help but wonder if it was his own fault for making people like that.
"That's not what I want, little brother."
The man's voice sounded sad and desolate, and Sasuke deliberately ignored it with a scoff, his incensed, pitch black eyes meeting Itachi's. "'Little brother'? As if you have the right to brand me with such a cruel title. Don't act like you careabout family because last I recall, you murdered yours."
Sasuke felt the tremor that passed through Itachi's body as vividly as though it traveled into his own. The older man's face was scrunched up in an indefinable expression. A pang of grief passed through Sasuke and, before he could regret his words, he swiftly turned his gaze away, ignoring the unconcealed torment emitting from Itachi's person.
"…You are right," Itachi confessed lightly. "I apologize for marring your good name, and i-it's true, I killed…" He swallowed. "I killed everyone. Our entire clan was destroyed because of me."
Sasuke was trembling, and he punched his fist into Itachi's chest again. "Why? Why the fuck would you do that?" He put the quavering hand to his face, a violent shiver running through his entire being. "Why…Why, I don't understand. Why would you leave…why would you leave…me."
Sasuke clutched at both his eyes as his anger was renewed, intense rage flowing through every pore in his body. "If you didn't love me why didn't you just say so? Why would you kill everyone just to leave me behind, drenched in the blood of my own family? Why, did you do it just to prove a point? To prove how superior you were?" He was banging his fists against Itachi's chest again, his rage blinding him from all else. "Why didn't you just kill me?"
"I could never kill you," Itachi whispered after a moment, voice sounding strained, but ever passionate.
Sasuke burst into sobs, his once pounding fists now limp against Itachi's chest. "Like fuck if I believe that." He said, eyes shut tight. His voice was low, aching. "Y-you killed e-everyone, s-so e-easily." He sniffled, and he wiped his nose with the palm of his hand. "A-and then, when I lost my memories, y-you were so nice to me." He shook his head fervently. "It doesn't make sense. None of this makes sense!"
Brot—," Itachi stopped. "Sasuke, I would like you to know the truth."
Sasuke looked up to the man's eyes. "What?"
Itachi held his palm gently against the boy's smooth cheek, and Sasuke couldn't help but resist slapping it away. The older man's face had such a captivating air, and Sasuke's body was a statue, unable to turn or look away.
Itachi allowed a small, delicate smile to lift his features. "I want you to know why I killed them."
2 Hours Later
"So…so that's how it is?"
"That's why you killed everyone?"
Sasuke leaned back against the tree trunk, head upturned to the darkened sky. The looming trees obscured the clouds, engulfing the infinite expanse of sky. It looked quiet up there, peaceful, and Sasuke wished he could achieve that kind of tranquility in himself. He clutched lightly at his chest, closing his eyes. His heart hurt.
Itachi's explanation had been thorough, decisive, and straightforward, and nowhere could Sasuke find a loophole in the older man's story. If he didn't know better, he'd say Itachi was telling the truth.
Even so, he was hard-pressed to believe everything the man had said. After all, he had killed…fuck, he had killed everyone.
But he was ordered to.
Sasuke's hands clenched to fists. What should he believe? Was it possible that Konoha had demanded the Uchiha clan's massacre? Was that even plausible?
But the way Itachi had said it, it was so fervent and earnest that Sasuke couldn't not believe it.
So…where did that leave them?
Sasuke sighed lightly, running a hand through his raven hair. "What…What am I supposed to say? I-I don't know what to believe." Sasuke hated how he was being so honest, but his mind was frantically searching for a solution. Should he hate Itachi despite it all; it was murder. But he had done it out of loyalty for the village, and he was forced to kill the clan. Itachi had been a kid when it all happened, so maybe he shouldn't be held morally responsible.
Itachi didn't say anything, only continued to watch Sasuke through intense eyes. Sasuke swallowed, his gaze briefly meeting Itachi's. "Does this mean everything can just go back to the way things were?"
In kneeling position, Itachi offered a small smile. "I think it could, little brother…if you let it."
Sasuke didn't know what to say to that.
Three Days Later
It turned out Sasuke could forgive Itachi for the crime he had committed all those years ago. Sasuke could hardly remember the faces of his parents, his family, and he felt oddly content with just having his brother by his side. His head rested comfortably in Itachi's lap, both of them sitting contently on the sofa in their small home. Some nameless show was on the television screen, and Sasuke couldn't bring himself to get too excited about it. It'd been years since he'd seen a TV, but he felt much more happy that Itachi was watching it with him.
He couldn't remember ever feeling so safe. It was an odd feeling, but comforting. Itachi's fingers were weaving through his own dark hair, slowly lulling him to sleep.
"'Tachi?" Sasuke slurred after a while.
"Yes, brother?" There was a hint of a smile in his voice.
"You're not gonna leave me 'gain, right?"
The hand through his hair stopped half a second, before picking up its usual pace. Sasuke felt Itachi lean forward. "Never. You're stuck with me."
Sasuke could only smile.
One Month Later
"I really wish these shows didn't consist of two people fucking like rabbits all the damn time," Sasuke grumbled, flipping the channel to find a couple trapped in a heated embrace, the woman's breast grasped firmly in the man's palm. He flipped it again, landing safely on a sports channel.
Itachi momentarily halted in his chore, setting down his utensils to look over at his brother. He stood there for a moment, subtly fidgeting with the hem of his shirt, before finally making his way over to the sofa Sasuke was planted in, sitting beside him.
"Actually, this was…something I wanted to talk about," Itachi said, voice lacking in the amusement Sasuke had been anticipating.
Sasuke only looked at him incredulously. "You want to talk about fucking?"
"Not…per se," Itachi said, flushing. "Sasuke, I would like…" Itachi eyes drifted as he looked to the side, humble. "I'd like to make a request, if you don't mind."
Sasuke cocked an eyebrow, curiosity getting the better of him. "What?"
"I know that…I know that everything you've been through has altered your personality considerably. This is obviously to be expected." Itachi was twiddling with the hem of his worn jacket, a sign of anxiety. A sign of weakness. A sign that was neversupposed to show. "But…could you try not to be so…disturbingly vulgar?"
Now both Sasuke's eyebrows were raised, and he would've broken into a chuckle if Itachi's face wasn't so dark and haunted. "Wha—Why?"
Itachi swallowed, attempting a smile. "No reason. It just…reminds me." The fake smile fell. "Reminds me of how scarred you are…" His voice trailed off, barely reeling in the final words because of me.
Itachi looked away, mood morose. Never in Itachi's knowledge had Sasuke ever been so blunt or vulgar when discussing sexual content. All those years ago, he'd been a true innocent, a pure child with nothing but good intentions and harmless words. It hit Itachi hard to see that boy has grown up an abused, mentally disturbed fifteen year old that so easily replaces "sex" with "fuck".
Worse yet, it didn't seem as though Sasuke was disturbed by it at all. Maybe the vulgar vocabulary was so common it had just become habit.
And if so many sadistic men hadn't gotten their repulsive hands on him, his baby brother wouldn't be so scarred.
Sasuke spoke, hoping he sounded eager. "Sure. I'm kind of ignorant on how actual teenagers are suppose to act anyway, so what do I need to change?"
Itachi looked up at that. Sasuke had been damn near secluded his entire life, trapped in Deidara's hell for two full years, then used by Orochimaru for three. Sasuke didn't know how he was supposed to act.
Itachi couldn't help the small smile that crossed his face at the irony of his brother's ignorance. When he was younger, he was cloistered from all the things provocative and grotesque, growing up under the strict regulations of the Uchiha clan. A few years later, that ignorance was brutally stripped from him as he was forced to witness the harshest, most inhumane reality of the world. Rape.
After the massacre, he'd essentially lost any pride or dignity he had left at the hands of Deidara, Orochimaru, and every man he was forced to sleep with while amnesiac. Instead of being ignorant of sexual perversion, Sasuke lost all knowledge of the other side of world, the happy, more carefree place most people are mercifully dealt. When Sasuke at least appears in that world, he is once again forced into ignorance, and has to re-learn all the rules he'd tried so hard to acquire last time.
"Well, first of all," Itachi began, "few people like talking about sex so bluntly. And nobody calls it 'fucking'." While that wasn't necessarily the case, Itachi didn't want his little brother to seem like the sleazy pervert that wants to get in everyone's pants when he was merely utterly and completely naïve. "And you never have sex for money. Never. Men that want to pay you for sex are bad people that must always be avoided."
Sasuke was taking in every word, like a dog waiting to be taught the latest trick. Itachi's smiled slightly at the boy's fervor to learn. He knew they'd have to take little steps, and he knew it would be hard for the both of them, but maybe…
Itachi's smile widened as he suddenly ruffled Sasuke's dark hair, the boy's once attentive gaze morphing into a frown as he tried to hide his smile.
Maybe he could make Sasuke human, after all.
And at last we reach the end! I'm truly sorry for my horribly intermittent updates. I'm kind of new with this, so my next story will already be fully written before I put it on the website. That way, I won't have to scramble around trying to create a chapter. I hope the ending wasn't too boring or abrupt! Thanks for sticking with me this long!