By the time she arrived at her office after court, Casey was extremely frustrated. Having been yelled at in open court by Judge Petrovsky had made her feel like she was five years old again and had gotten caught with her hand in the cookie jar. Casey had been a prosecutor with the Special Victims Unit for almost nine years, plus the three years she had been censured for, and she still had not been able to deduce why the judge hated her so much.
Hanging her coat on the rack, Casey closed the door and sat down at her desk, sighing. She checked the clock, noting that she needed to be home in approximately an hour and a half, which meant she would need to leave the office in forty five minutes. For now, she wanted some alone time to gather her thoughts and relax, away from her coworkers, the stress of the job, and everything else that had been weighing on her mind lately. Not the least of which was Olivia's betrayal, which still stung to think about, as if the knowledge were new.
Casey had been sorting through the list of evidence she had been given by Fin and Munch to see if they had enough probable cause for a search warrant, when she was startled out of her thoughts by a loud knock on the door. The attorney sighed and called out 的t's open,without looking up from her reading. As she heard the door open, her gaze wandered up curiously, and she sighed once more when she saw Olivia standing in front of the door, which the detective quickly closed. 徹livia, what are you doing here?Casey asked. 的 have to get this done and try to drop it off at the precinct before I go home. I can't have any distractions. The redhead turned her attention back to her paperwork, attempting to ignore the intoxicating scent of her wife's cologne. Why does she affect me like this? I'm hopelessly in love. That was the thought that ran through Casey's mind at that moment, rather than the more appropriate Hearsay rarely counts as probable cause in a judge's eyes.
的 had to go check on a victim, who called and told me she needed someone to talk to. After I left her place, I figured I would stop by here since your office was only twenty minutes away. Casey, believe me when I say that working yourself to death is not going to help you get over the stress or the pain. All it does is make you feel overwhelmed, which makes things worse in the long run."
Casey sighed, capping her pen and dropping it onto the desk. She folded her arms on top of the desk and looked at the older woman, her normally emerald eyes more of a murky green in her current emotional state. 徹livia, this is not because I feel overloaded because of work. That is a completely different feeling. This is because my wife can't keep her hands to herself, and that, combined with the fact that I have been practically a single mother for the last several months, has me on edge. I think I'm entitled to be frustrated, don't you?she asked, though she knew it was a rhetorical question.
鼎asey, how many times do I have to tell you I am sorry? I promise you, with everything at stake, that I will never so much as look at another woman that way, ever again. If I'm working and I happen to see a naked victim, I'll just allow my mind to wander to sexy visuals of everything I want to do to my sexy wife."
Casey tried not to smile, but despite her best attempts, her lips curled up anyway. 徹livia,she murmured, her gaze falling once more to her paperwork. 的 don't want you to do that, and besides, it's not that simple. I'm not asking you not to think anyone else is beautiful. I just...the attorney trailed off, wondering where her point was headed along this slippery slope of reasoning. It rarely took much for her logic to escape her when she was around Olivia, especially when the older woman's chocolate brown eyes had taken on an irresistible pout, as they were doing at that very moment. 鼎heating is the worst thing you can do in a relationship, Olivia. It is the ultimate betrayal, and I've been cheated on so many times...I just thought you were different,she added quietly, her voice dropping to a mere whisper.
It was Olivia's turn to sigh. The detective leaned forward, placing her hand on top of Casey's, which was resting on the surface of the desk. 鼎asey, look at me,she ordered softly. As Casey's gaze slowly rose to meet hers, Olivia offered a tiny smile. 滴urting you was the stupidest thing I have ever done. I had no right to do that, and trust me, nothing you can call me can be worse than everything I have already called myself. But I promise you, in the name of my love for you, that you are my princess, my baby, my everything. I will never hurt you again, no matter what. The brunette stood up and walked over to the other side of the desk. Standing behind Casey, she placed her hands on the younger woman's shoulders and began to massage them, while murmuring 的 love you very much."
的 love you too,Casey murmured automatically, quickly becoming lost in the feel of the older woman's strong hands. It was one of the many things about Olivia that made Casey melt like butter.
Olivia brushed Casey's long red hair off her shoulder and placed a tender kiss on her neck. 鼎asey, honey, can you ever forgive me for being so stupid?"
泥idn't we have this discussion last night?Casey wondered out loud.
添es, but how do I know you haven't changed your mind since then?Olivia asked. 擢or all I know, when I get home tonight, there will be an 'I hate Olivia Benson' sign on the front door."
Casey rolled her eyes, too frustrated to laugh at the brunette's attempt to cheer her up. 典here's no sign that says that...yet. She turned around and looked up at her beautiful wife. 展as she better than me?she asked quietly. 展as she louder? Has she been with more women? Shaking her head, she turned around to face the desk once more so that her back was to Olivia.
鼎asey, no one is better than you, okay? You're beautiful, and kind, and loving. Your whimpers are the perfect companion to my screams. It's one of the many things that makes us so perfect for each other,Olivia replied with a soft smile, running her fingers lovingly through Casey's long red curls. 添ou're the only one I want,the brunette murmured, kissing the top of Casey's head. 鉄he may have been with more girls, but you know what? Knowing that I am the only woman you have ever been with has always made me feel proud, and special, in so many ways. And that is better than having slept with a multitude of people and having perhaps too much experience."
Casey exhaled slowly, her shoulders moving up and down as she breathed. Olivia's words were tugging on her heartstrings, making her feel the same way she had on their very first night together, almost five years before. She was torn between finding it difficult to forgive the older woman, and the desperate desire to turn around, kiss her passionately, and beg her to take her right then and there. Finding a compromise that would appease both decisions was going to be difficult, indeed. 徹livia?Casey asked quietly, after a long pause, with the only sound in the room being the clock on the wall.
鄭nything for you,Olivia murmured, running her fingers through Casey's hair once more.
Casey shook her head. 鏑ast night, I agreed to forgive you, after acknowledging that it will take a long time. But before I can do that, babe, I think...I think I just need to see, over time, that you are loyal to me, and only me. If I see that, over an extended period of time, then I will know that it is safe to trust you again, and only then can I truly forgive you. Only then can we ever have any hope of ever being what we once were. I have to know that I can trust you again, babe."
的 know, honey,Olivia whispered, placing another kiss on the top of Casey's head. 的've never been in this position before. Usually people beg me to forgive them, not the other way around. I feel very strange, to tell you the truth...The detective trailed off, and took a deep breath, exhaling slowly. 釘ut I will prove myself to you, no matter the strange circumstances. I can't bear to lose you or our daughters. Nothing and no one on this planet is worth that consequence."
徹livia, can you please stop with the monologues?Casey asked, turning to face her wife. 的 get it. Trust me, it's strange for me, too, being in this position. You're the alpha in this marriage, so why am I taking on the alpha role at the moment? The redhead shrugged, reaching for her coffee and taking a tiny sip of it. She winced as it scalded her throat, and placed it on the desk once more. 釘ut sometimes things change. I know it's strange, but it has to be done, you know? Casey looked down as Olivia took her hand. 的'm scared,she murmured. 摘verything already fell apart once. I just don't think I can handle it if it happens again. I can't take it, emotionally, mentally, or physically."
的 know,Olivia answered, kissing Casey's forehead. 鏑ook at me. For the second time that night, emerald green locked with chocolate brown, as the two women gazed into each other's eyes. 鼎asey Novak, would you be my wife?she asked, with a small smile.
Casey smiled brightly. 的 already am your wife,she whispered. 釘ut if I say yes, do you promise to have and to hold, in sickness and in health, as long as we both shall live?she asked, hoping Olivia would ignore the fact that she had completely paraphrased the traditional wedding vows.
的 do,Olivia answered quietly, helping Casey to her feet and pulling the redhead in for a passionate kiss. For several moments, the only sounds in the room were the soft moans from Casey and the louder, deeper ones from Olivia as their tongues danced to a forbidden beat. Olivia pulled back slowly, and it was clear that she regretted it. 的 should get back to the precinct,she murmured. 的s there anything you need me to take back?"
Casey held up the evidence list, and the letter she had just placed the finishing touches on, before Olivia entered and their discussion started. 鼎an you give these to Fin and Munch?she requested. 的t's the evidence list they gave me when they asked if I could get a warrant, and the other paper is the quick note I wrote them telling them that I circled the few things on the list that we can use, but that we do not have enough for a search warrant yet."
Olivia nodded. 的'll give it to them,she promised. 的 should be home around midnight tonight, although I am expecting a victim to come in and talk to me. I think she's finally ready to tell me who attacked her, which is a relief, because I have spent days trying to figure it out, and I am blocked in every attempt. Her identification will be instrumental, because the creep left no forensics for us. No DNA, no fingerprints...the only lead we had was a brochure for a trip to Mexico, and that turned out to be hers."
的'm sure you'll figure it out,Casey murmured. 的 have faith in you,she added.
典hanks,Olivia replied, smiling. She kissed Casey gently once more and walked over to the door, opening it.
Casey sat down at her desk once more, then looked up. 徹livia?she asked. Seeing Olivia turn around and look at her questioningly, Casey smiled softly. 的 have faith in you in every way,she promised, knowing that, if anyone would catch the double meaning of her words, it would be her wife.