I had to hide behind my book so that he wouldn't see me giggling. The way he was stumbling through the door with a tripod that had a camera attached was quite a funny site. Not to mention his glasses that seemed to magnify his eyes so that they looked as if they were looking through the bottom of glass milk bottles. And his little green bow-tie was pretty funny too, to be honest; it was taking a lot of my strength to refrain from laughing aloud.
When he finally got his tripod through the door (trust me, that really wasn't meant to sound as weird as it did), he began scanning the room, as it were, looking like he was going to pick someone. Now, I don't know about you, but when a dorky looking guy struggles through a cafe a door, carrying a camera, I find it's best to look as inconspicuous as possible. Thankfully for me however, he picked the loud chavs a few tables down from me. Meaning I was able to watch and find out what exactly he was here for while hiding behind my book quite well.
After a few minutes of him fumbling around, setting up his camera, his waxed down hair hardly moving, he finally sat down in front of the girls at the table and started to speak, in what sounded like a god awful American impersonation.
"I am he called Dean, Dean Tavalouris." Interesting name, I thought to myself. He then went on to say, "Now, which one of you beautiful daughters of Archimedes will furnish me with a cigarette?"
I'll admit, it was at this moment that I almost gave myself away by nearly choking on my coffee. I mean come one, he called them beautiful, I can't even make a 'oh, maybe he should get some glasses' jokes because he quite clearly had some already. Anyway, apart from nearly dying from a sip of coffee, I was actually rather intrigued to see what he was planning on doing, you see, after he asked the "beautiful" girls for a cigarette, they both handed him a pack, he only asked for one, silly people.
He got one of the girls to light a cigarette while he had hold of it; clearly he'd never done that before because he let out a small cough and a wheeze after breathing in a miniscule amount of smoke. I found it quite sweet to be honest but the girls just laughed at him. He went on to say,
"Soon it will be but a memory, like smoke, in the wind." With that, he asked the girl who was holding a blue cloth; did I forget to mention that he got one of the girls to hold a blue cloth? I'm rather bad at re-telling events, sorry about that but bare with me. So, yeah, he got the girl with the cloth to wave it over his hand that he had placed the cigarette in (I forgot to mention that too, didn't I?) and then he opened his hand and it was gone. Needless to say, I was quite confused, I know how most magic tricks work but I'd only ever worked with cards, I'd never seen a disappearing act before. I think my facial expression pretty much cemented my state of confusion. My bewilderment didn't last long thanks to one of the waitresses slamming a tray down on my table, she wanted to know if I was going to be ordering anymore coffee or if I was going to leave because I wasn't "using the cafe for its intentional purpose (this made me chuckle because they'd obviously missed Dean walking in to film himself doing magic tricks, if that's not a misuse of a cafe then, I don't know what is). I was about to say I'd leave but was interrupted by a loud bang on the glass pane at the front of the shop.
It was pretty obvious that they were friends of the girls because after the bang at the window, they piped up with a loud; "Heeeeeey!" while beckoning the two guys to come in. They came and sat next to Dean, I say 'sat', it was more of a 'squish'. Dean appeared stuck between the two new people and had a rather, uncomfortable look on his face. I quickly said I'd have another coffee; I wanted to see how this panned out. The girls told the guys about Dean's magic trick and asked if he could show it to them two but he tried to stand up and get away, they pulled him back down, I began to worry at this point, he clearly wanted to get away. The guy on Dean's left, I think his name was Mickey or something, he handed Dean a cigarette to do the trick but just as he did that, the guy on Dean's right, I think his name may have been Bongo, not sure, he pulled up from under the table what looked like a fake thumb, so that's how that trick works.
Suddenly my view on the situation was blocked by the fat arse of the waitress delivering my coffee and while she was removing the cup from the tray I heard an unsettling, crippling scream. I moved my seat so I could see past the unfazed waitress, it was Dean, Mickey had hold of Dean's hand and held the, now stubbed out, cigarette against Dean's hand. Mickey let go of his hand and then turned to Dean's camera. From where I was stood, it looked as though Dean was crying, I felt as though I should do something, I felt as though I should go over and stand up for Dean and make sure he was ok, or at least, partially ok but I couldn't move, I could only watch. Mickey and Bongo started to walk out of the cafe with Dean's camera followed by the two girls while Dean shouted after them.
I arose from my seat, took a deep breath, and prepared to walk over to Dean.