A/N Ok...so this story was originally only posted on Twiwrite, but I got bored this evening and decided to post it on here too. This is...well, it's one big perv fest basically. Born out of twitter fuckery when I was ordered to write a One Shot about a vampire cowboy fireman Jasper. It's kinda grown from that shifty Mynxi, of course, is my wonderful beta on this project and I should warn you that, while there is a plot in there somewhere, it's really mostly smut, smut and more smut. But it's all just a little bit of fun grins

I am Isabella Marie Swan and I have a dirty little secret. I live in Forks, Washington and I have a total and utter obsession with the local night time Fire fighter crew. It's not even a little obsession, it's huge. It's frequenting the bar opposite the station, huge; it's making sure that I have the same seat every night that gives me the best view, huge.

I try to have my girlfriends with me. I tell myself it's their company that I want and not the alibi of socialising to cover my ass, should anyone call me out for perving all over the fire crew. But come on, who the hell can blame me? They were hot. All of them. I could never think of one thing wrong with them, they were more than models, more than movie stars. They real were heroes. Manly, sinful, sexual perfection. I often wondered that if one of them looked at me long enough, whether or not I could spontaneously orgasm. I was a willing guinea pig to test that theory.

There are six fire fighters in total. All different, yet strikingly the same. They all share the same pale white skin, gold eyes, and striking good looks. Yet, there was something there to catch the eye of every woman on the planet. If you want dark hair, huge muscles, built like a brick shit house, complete with dimples and a smile that would melt your heart, and at the same time your panties, then Emmett is your man candy. He's massive, and going off the cut of his trousers, there are no steroids involved. If you know what I mean. He seemed to be the joker of the group, always goofing off around the station, usually using the hose to spray the others instead of the engine they were cleaning. Not that I minded. Find me a heterosexual woman that wouldn't want to see half naked, fuck hot, sexy ass men messing around, dripping wet, and I'll eat my bra.

Of course if large muscles aren't really your thing, then there is Edward. He's lean and powerful, his body is defined and sinuous like Bruce Lee. The kind of build that is often underestimated, and usually to the person's detriment. He was strong, that was obvious. He was also insanely beautiful, even his hair was beautiful, like stop your heart and forget how to breathe beautiful, and he had this crooked grin that never failed to make me miss a step as I walked past the station house.

Peter, is tall, with broad shoulders, and built like a swimmer. All I wanna do is run my hands across the planes of his chest and trace his silhouette with my tongue. He has slightly wavy, dark blonde hair, and is never without a smile. He has a broad southern accent, I'd guess Texas but I can't be sure. I do know that if he wants something from me all he would need to do was ask for it. That voice! All that would come from me would be a moaned out, 'yes Sir'.

Carlisle is blonde, British, inhumanly handsome, drop your panties at his feet and faint, kinda guy. He always had a kind smile for me if I saw him. He always gave me a smooth and polite, "Hello, Isabella," if we were within hearing range. I always managed to sputter and grin like a fool, blushing redder than the fire engine, and pretty much running off before I embarrassed myself further.

Another Brit in the group is Ben. He seems like he is a cheeky bastard, sarcastic and funny. I've never seen him without a cheery disposition. He seems somewhat rough around the edges, with a shaved head and a faint sign of scruff around his chin. He, like Edward, is built like a martial artist. Though Ben is stockier and shorter in comparison.

And then there is Jasper. Jasper. Just the sound of his name makes me tingle and clench below the belt. I wanna shout it, call it out, scream it as he plunges in and out of me. I want to ride him like the cowboy he is, until we've single handily saved every horse in the history or future of mankind. He was, fuck, I said cowboy didn't I? Because he is, or at least was before he moved here. Well, at least that's what I'd garnered through some stealthy ninja style eaves dropping. Otherwise known as, accidentally on purpose, dropping my open purse just outside the station house while they were taking photos for the charity calendar that they do every year. Jasper had been sitting on a horse, with the bottom half of his uniform on and the only thing covering his chest were the suspenders holding his pants up. I wanted to cut them off. He was also holding a fire hose. A big one. I think I had a minor heart attack over that scene.

The other scenes were just as panty drenching. Carlisle, who was evidently a medic also, was dressed up the same as Jasper, but with a lab coat over the top and a stethoscope around his neck. Ben was posed with a fire hydrant behind him that was spurting water, falling down on him as if it were raining. Emmett was holding two huge rolled up fire hoses in his arms, his muscles bulging with the strain. Peter was working a lasso in a way that made me want to run forward and beg him to ensnare me. Edward, well Edward made glasses look sexy, as he posed on a desk, reading a book, one leg dangling while the other was perched next to him, his freaking 6 pack standing out for all to see.

I was grateful to whichever horny bitch had come up with these concepts.

So there you have it, something to meet every woman's tastes. Or, if you were me, a veritable buffet of manly perfection. Personally, I wanted all of them, in every place and position I could get them in, and for the rest of eternity.

So that left me here, sitting in my usual spot, watching them play around and work on the engine, waiting for the next call to come in. I have even considered playing with matches more than once, since they'd started working there. I was also gripping a piece of paper in my hand, a very important piece of paper. A piece of paper that was, in fact, a job application. The Station was looking to hire a secretary.

My application was already filled out, neatly and precisely, and to the best of my ability. The only thing left to do was put it in the envelope, address it, stamp it, and post it. Simple right? Nah. Not in the least. Because mailing it meant that I would likely get an interview, and getting an interview meant that I would be in the same room as one or more of them, and that I would have to form a sentence, other than 'do me now'. Now, you may be thinking that I'm over exaggerating, but I'm probably not doing them any justice in my descriptions. Greek Gods have nothing on these guys.

So there in lay my problem, this was a chance to work closely with the men that I have been drooling over and fantasying about since coming home from college, the question was; could I be coherent enough to make it through the interview, and impress them enough to give me the job? I was more than qualified, hell I'd been hanging around in Forks working as a secretary for one reason and one reason only. I am incapable of leaving these guys here, to go off in search of a career. This may be lame and pathetic, but I didn't care. I am obsessed, drawn to them like a moth to a flame, something that I had never experienced before and that I didn't want to give up.

"Hey, Bella, staring at the fire hotties again?" Jessica's laughing shocked me out of my thoughts and I looked up, beet red, to see my two best friends standing there with barely contained laughter written all over their faces.

"I-I wasn't staring...I was..." I groaned, knowing there was no use to denying it. "Alright, so I was enjoying the view. As if you wouldn't be doing the same thing if you were sitting here."

They laughed again, taking their seats across from me, ordering a round of Tequila, and our own personal drinks. I ordered a JD and coke, Jess ordered a pint, and Angela had recently developed a taste for this sweet, sparkly wine shit that tasted like fizzy soda, but got her totally wasted. Yeah, I'll be sticking with my usual.

"So...whatcha got there, Sweetie?" Angela asked, as I was trying to covertly slide the paper in question across the table and into my bag.

No such luck as she didn't wait for an answer, instead she leaned forward and at a speed that I hadn't anticipated, she grabbed it straight outta my hand as I squealed, trying to grab it back. The fact that she jumped out of her seat, away from me and Jessica was up blocking my path before I could blink, drove away any hope of getting my application back. It also meant that I was in for a night of ridicule and drunken encouragement to submit the damn thing.

"Wow, you're applying for the secretary position at the Station House? I thought you liked working at the doctor's surgery center?" Angela asked, but her smirk gave her away. She knew exactly why I would go for the new job.

I rolled my eyes, trying to play it off. Failing miserably, I laid my forehead on the desk and waited. I heard them sit back down and the rustle of my paper, as they read the application. When the drinks were delivered, I reached over and grabbed my shot, downing it quickly, before going for my JD and coke. I glanced to the girls, freezing when I saw they were both staring at me with identical anticipatory expressions.

I took a sip of my drink. "What?"

They smiled, Jess that answered, "Are you gonna actually send this? Or stare at it the same way you stare at them?"

"You know you totally should, I would apply if I weren't training to be a vet," Angela said wistfully, staring out across the street.

Together, Jess and I both followed suit, looking out the window, we even gave out sighs in unison at the sight. All they were doing, was standing around chatting, the odd laugh and shoulder smack. But they were there, and that was enough. They were in jeans and tight T-shirts, a couple with baseball caps on, and Emmett with his muscles bulging, threw his head back and laughed boisterously. I wanted to lick him.

Jessica's breathless voice came from beside me, "Which one would you want? I'd so go for Emmett, those muscles? That strength? Just think of the things he could do with me." I glanced at her, watching her bite her lip and shift in her seat. Not that I blamed her. What was weird though, was Emmett seemed to glance over at her declaration, before turning back to the others.

My mind is playing tricks on me. I must be suffering from the copious amounts of unfulfilled hormones that have been running around my system lately. Can you get brain poisoning from sexual frustration?

Angela answered next, her eyes just as glazed over as the rest of us, "For me it would have to be Carlisle," my brow furrowed as Carlisle froze, turning our way slightly, before the others seemed to start winding him up about something. Weird.

"What about you Bella? Which one do you want?" Jess asked.

I sighed, my mind currently across the street and in the gutter, so I was running on instinct when I answered, "All of them."

Ange and Jess turned to me and giggled, while I stared in shock across the street as they ALL turned towards us. Well, me. Because they were all looking at me. Every single one of them. I blanched one second, and then blushed, as they all smirked, I flew backwards into my chair, looking at the table and downing my drink before quickly ordering another one. Angela and Jessica were full out laughing at me, thinking that my reaction was because of my confession.

"Wow, I never pegged you for such a horn dog, Bella," Angela managed between snorts and giggles. Jess didn't even bother trying to speak.

The night went on in relatively the same fashion; more alcohol, more swooning, and ended up with them trying to get me to send the damn application. So that was where we are right now, all slurring slightly and I'd gotten to the stage where my hands were waving about emphatically, to make each and every point.

"Look, it's a bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad idea. It just is," I said, slapping my hand down on the table to make my point, and then sipping my drink.

Jess snorted, spitting beer and laughing into her hand, she was falling sideways against the window and more or less howling with laughter. Was it really that funny? I giggled anyway.

"So, because I don't wanna get the wrong idea, you're saying that it would be a bad idea?" Angela asked, before copying Jess's actions, both of them now leaning on each other for support, laughing at me.

I stuck my tongue out at them, blowing a raspberry in their general direction, then going back to my drink. I glanced over at the station and sighed, exaggeratingly. I really wanted to fuck my way through them. Maybe a couple at the same time. Hmmm, that would be nice.

"Oh, just send it in. What's the worst that could happen? Just fucking do it, then it's done and you've done it. You can always turn down the interview. This way, you know that you did it. You won't be looking back and wishing that you did it. In fact, fuck it, you are doing it. And you'll be going to the interview. Me and Jess will take you shopping for the perfect interview outfit," Angela said, slightly slurred, grinning like a mad woman.

Me? Well, in my drunken state it certainly sounds like a damn good idea. "You're on; let's go mail it now and we can go back to my apartment and get shitfaced in celebration."

So we did, wasting no time, all three of us, walked out of the bar arm in arm, across and down the street towards the post box. Of course, we had to walk past the station house, not that that was a hardship. They were sitting at a table towards the back playing cards, poker by the sounds of things. They all looked up as we passed them, and me in my intoxicated state managed a blinding smile. I may have also winked in their direction. A little.

"Evenin', ladies." Jasper said, my heart jumped into my chest and tried to escape through my throat.

Shit, he's talking to us? This wasn't the plan! Abort! Abort! Danger Will Robinson Danger! Bella melting into a puddle of goo will commence in T minus three seconds.

I managed to get myself together enough to answer him, "Good evening."

Why can't I come up with some witty, sexy remark? Good evening? And does my voice have to be that shaky? Mental facepalm for Bella.

"Are you enjoying your night out?" Carlisle asked, as he...came over as well!

Panic stations! Need more alcohol! Tequila, STAT.

Jess and Angela stopped, keeping me in place, between them, and turned to the approaching men. I prayed to God and every other deity that I could think of that I wasn't matching the fire engines colour. Unfortunately, the fiery heat of my cheeks told me otherwise. Yay.

I can't do this, how the hell can do this? Find me someone, anyone, who can speak coherently around these people?

"Why, yes we have, thank you. We were just on our way back to Bella's," Angela answered, completely composed and making me hate her for that. How? How?

"Actually, we were just mailing this before heading back." Jess snatched the job application out of my hand and held it up. "Maybe we can just give it straight to you? You know, leave out the pesky postal service and all," Jessica purred. I swear, she fucking purred.

What is it with these two being able to speak, let alone flirt, and actually make sense? I kept my mouth shut, and looked at the ground, for the first time ever wanting to be anywhere but at the station house.

"And what might that be?" I watched out of the corner of my eye as Edward reached forward and plucked the letter out of Jessica's hand. Shit, Edward's here as well?

Dear ground, if you could just open and swallow me up, that would be great! Thanks, much love, me.

Edward chuckled lightly, "A job application? It seems that Miss Isabella Swan here is applying for the secretary position," Edward said. The way he said position brought up so many dirty images in my mind that I almost creamed myself then and there. Not really the first impression you want to give your potential employer.

"Is that so? Well maybe we should take a look at this now? We can sort out a time for the interview, if the application is satisfactory," Carlisle said, and I looked at him in shock. He was smiling like he knew something that I didn't. I was definitely missing. Although that could have more to do with my level of intoxication and infatuation than there actually being something more than meets the eye in this exchange.

Peter came forward then and addressed Jessica and Angela, "Ladies, why don't we keep you occupied while Carlisle looks after your friend here?"

Angela and Jessica jumped at the offer, letting go of me and walking away, following Peter towards the card table. I watched them go, my face a flame and my teeth worrying my bottom lip, before turning back to Carlisle and Edward.

Carlisle held his hand out to me. "Why don't you come this way and we can hash out the details?"

I took his hand, thinking that he was offering it to shake and was more than surprised when he kept hold of it, leading me through the station and into the office. Edward followed, shutting the door behind him as I took a seat. Carlisle sat in the one behind the desk and Edward stood at his right side. I tried desperately to get myself under control and wished fervently that I hadn't drank quite as much as I had. I had a feeling that I was going to need all of my faculties, in one-hundred percent working order, to get through this without making a fool of myself.

Why the hell did I have to listen to my bozo friends?

I sat there as Carlisle read my application, and Edward smiled at me from across the desk, his full lips all pink and inviting. His smile was crooked and beautiful, his golden eyes darker than I remembered, and they were currently smouldering.

I really need to sober up.

"Would you like a drink, Bella?" Edward asked.

"Some water would be wonderful, thank you." Then something occurred to me, "But...how did you know my name?"

He laughed lightly, a beautiful sound, "It's in your application, Bella."

I blushed, realising how stupid my question had sounded, "No, of course I know my name is on the application. I mean, how did you know that I prefer to be called Bella?"

His face fell for just a second before he recovered, "Oh, your friends referred to you as such, I hope I wasn't being presumptuous?"

No they didn't, did they? I couldn't be sure, I had been so befuddled earlier on and the alcohol on top of all that, so I smiled sweetly and nodded.

"No, not presumptuous at all," I assured him, still not quite sure that I believed what he said.

Being this close to them, literally within touching distance, was wreaking havoc on my senses. I could smell them. Not in a bad way, there was no BO cycling around the office, no. Why would there be? That would make it so much easier. Nope, they smelled sweet, like Christmas or freshly baked cookies; comforting. I had to fight with myself not to lean forward and sniff their necks. I could feel my eyes dilate, becoming hooded, so I looked to my lap praying that they didn't notice, hoping for some kind of distraction to just pop out from somewhere, giving me a reprieve. My hands were curled around each other, stopping myself from reaching out to either Carlisle or Edward, or both, if I'm being completely honest. I could feel heat rising in me with every breath I took and I desperately wanted to get home, so that I could relieve the tension.

"Are you ok, Bella? You look a little flushed." Carlisle asked, smiling...no, smirking at me. I gulped, staring at his lips, thinking that these men were going to be the death of me. I didn't even think about answering the question.

I could barely stand being in the same room with them for two minutes without ogling them and fantasising, how the hell was I supposed to work with them?

I watched transfixed as Carlisle's smirk grew. I watched his tongue, all pink and wet and succulent dart out and wet his bottom lip. I think I groaned, and that was what dragged me back to reality.

Stuttering, I made to get up, too embarrassed to stay any longer, "I-I'm sorry, I...er...I'm fine. I'd best be getting back now, I think I had a little too much...to ...er drink. And that can't be making a good impression, thank you for-"

I had made it about two steps away from the desk before Edward was in front of me. His crooked grin in place and his eyes were almost black and filled with something I had no business naming. His hold on my shoulders was light, but firm, his touch felt cool despite my coat and his eyes bore into mine. I couldn't move, fuck I could barely breathe. If he had kissed me in that moment, I would've done anything that he wanted. Anything that they both wanted. Because how could I forget Carlisle was in the room, especially as he came up behind me, making me the filling in the hot guy sandwich.

"Please, Bella, there is no need to leave," Edward said, his voice smooth as velvet and just as caressing. My skin tingled where his breath ghosted over my skin, my head swam and my heart began to miss beats.

I felt Carlisle brush my hair away from the base of my neck, tucking it behind my ear. I seriously could not help the whimpered moan that escaped when he spoke into my ear.

"Bella, after considering your application, I believe that we have found our new secretary." I swear his lips grazed my ear, tentatively enough that I was questioning it, but that sudden shock of coolness had to be him. I was on fire. "I trust that keeping to the night time hours is amenable to you?"

"Yes," I breathed out, what other answer was there?

I was on fire. And in a very, very good way.

"Come to us tomorrow at sun down, we will be here. We can...negotiate your positions with the crew when you arrive. Give your notice to the doctor's surgery center. I do believe that we are all very excited to have you on our...team," Edward said, his voice lower, his face closer, his lips...oh...so...close.

He blew across my face and I think I came, just a little, before my knees gave out and I was held flush between Carlisle and Edward. They're bodies were so chiselled and hard in all the right places. My rational side was trying to tell me that this cannot be happening, but my newly found inner sex goddess was screaming happily for me to just go with it. I, of course, listened to the sex goddess. My ass was against Carlisle's upper thighs and my groin was settled on Edward's knee that he had placed between us when I almost fell. My hands were clutched into Edward chest as his and Carlisle's arms were around me. They held me like that for what seemed like hours, the whole time I was yelling in my head 'do not grind'. Because grinding on your new employer's knee, after being klutzy enough to fall in the first place, was not a good impression.

Edward's frigid hand cradled my cheek, tilting my head so I had to look at him; his cold, hard flesh seemed to spark against the crimson heat of my cheeks, and my lips parted of their own volition. My eyes were barely open but I had no trouble staring into the ever darkening blackness of his eyes. What is it with their eyes? Are they actually changing colour or am I just that drunk? His thumb brushed over my cheek, sending my blush into overdrive, which seemed to please him greatly. I really liked the idea of pleasing him.

"We look forward to seeing you tomorrow evening, Bella. I think we will work very well together," Edward murmured.

He then glanced up and over my head, looking at Carlisle most likely, before stepping back and allowing Carlisle to take my weight as if I was nothing more than a feather in his arms. He turned me to him, his blonde hair bright in the overhead lights, he wound one arm around my back while the other went under my knees as he picked me up, as if I were his new bride and he was carrying me across the threshold.

I wish.

"It seems that the alcohol is taking its toll on your system, please drink the water that Edward brought for you, I promise you that it will help," he said, carrying me back to the desk.

I was in some sort of porno version of a fairytale.

It was awesome.

I just wish that my brain would engage enough to take advantage of it.

Instead of seating me back into my original chair, he sat down with me in his lap. I watched as he reached for the bottled water, his fingers long and graceful and oh so tempting. Once he had the bottle in his grasp, he proceeded to open it and hold it to my lips. His eyes, that are now just as dark as Edward's, held mine the entire time. I never even imagined that something like this could be so erotic. I was also incredibly thankful that I had chosen to wear jeans this evening; a skirt would have made my currently drenched condition a little more noticeable to them.

I drank the water, savouring in its cooling, sobering effects. I could even feel the heat in my cheeks dissipating. My throat worked to swallow, my eyes never wavered from Carlisle's and my hands kept their purchase in his shirt. The bottle slipped a little, spilling a drop or two down from the corner of my mouth. I went to apologise and to wipe the water from my face, but Carlisle stopped me, using his finger tip to collect it. I watched him bring it to his mouth, his tongue peeking out to lap at the moisture, before he sucked he tip of his finger into his mouth.

Holy shiiiiiiiiit.

I really hope that my mouth wasn't hanging open, because I had no way to tell if it was or not. The only thing I could feel right then, was the throbbing need to fuck Carlisle senseless, residing between my legs and on the tips of my nipples. My body was calling for him, already screaming his name.

There was a knock on the door and I jumped out of my skin, squealing and leaping up from Carlisle's lap. He laughed as he stood up, Edward opening the door with a crooked smile on his face, and me feeling like I had just been thrown down the fantasy rabbit hole.

Jasper was at the door.

Shit...I honestly might die.

'R.I.P Miss Isabella Swan, she died from an overdose of sex hormones and sexual frustration. They say that her clit was in fact blue when she was discovered.'

My mind gave me a mental smack down for being so damn stupid, telling me to just go with it and maybe get out of there, and come back when I'm sober. Sounds like a plan Stan.

But fuck me backwards with a rolling pin, Jasper is hot. He was staring at me, and I could see his eyes darken from light gold to black as he took me in. I watched his nostrils flare as if he was scenting the room. I saw the tension in his body as he seemingly kept himself back from me. Seriously though? I wanted him to run at me, tear at my clothes, and have his wicked way with me. In front of everyone if need be. Hell, everyone can join in.

How the hell am I supposed to work here again? Also, can somebody please tell me when it became acceptable, for me to want voyeuristic sex and maybe an orgy?

He growled. Jasper growled. I swear, he fucking growled. It was all feral and animalistic and sexy as hell, and kinda made me want to giggle. But it was inhuman, supernatural, and yes, still sexy as hell. Shit on a stick, I'm actively begging him to come have a go at me, in my mind...but still. An orgy? Really Bella? It was then that I decided that I needed to get out of there, sober up, take a very long cold shower or attack BOB for a few hours, and then come back all bright eyed and bushy tailed tomorrow evening. Yeppers, that's a plan that sounds promising.

It took me a couple of tries to remember how to speak. "Well, thank you for this opportunity, but I think that I should be getting home now. I need my sleep if I'm going to be of any use to you tomorrow...I mean, if I'm going to be able to sort you...anything out. Err...never mind, I'll go now." Cringing at my apparent lack of ability to talk without innuendo or intelligence, I made my way to the door.

Jasper didn't move other than to follow my movements, his head moving with me, his eyes never leaving my form. It was like he was radiating sex, and I don't just mean that he was sexy, I mean that he radiated sex. As in, it felt like if I were to touch him, that I would orgasm on the spot. Hard.

I really wanted to touch him.

"Jasper, I would like you to meet our new secretary, Bella. She will be coming back tomorrow evening, to sort out the details and will be starting work with us within two weeks time, just as soon as she has served her notice at her current position," Carlisle spoke, all calm, collected, and not remotely showing any signs of our earlier escapades. I was really starting to question whether someone had slipped something into my drink at the bar.

Jasper smiled, all sin and sex. "Well, that sure is mighty fine news there, Miss Bella."

I blushed. Again. The good thing about being in a fire station, was that when I spontaneously combust, they would have everything they need to put me out. And boy, did I want to be put out.

"Thank you," I muttered, a goofy smile on my face. "I really should be going now."

Jasper nodded, moving just enough that I could get through the door, just enough so that I had to brush past him as I left. I kept my eyes down as I went past him, biting my lip to hold back the gasp that tried to escape as my nipples grazed across his chest, I walked quickly down the corridor, towards the sounds of male laughter and female giggling. I felt like I was walking out of a dream. Jessica and Angela turned towards me as the door closed with a dull thud behind me. They stood up and walked over to me, after saying goodbye to Emmett, Ben, and Peter. The men all waved to me and welcomed me onto the team. I tried not to show my confusion on how they could possibly know that I had been offered or even accepted the position.

The night air was cooler than before, I walked in silence, listening to Angela and Jess gush about spending time with the men, while I was in the office. Apparently, they had been impressed by their gentlemanly natures, so polite and thoughtful. I kept quiet, other than to confirm that I had the job. They squealed and decided that more celebrating was in order, so we ended up back at my apartment with a bottle of Tequila, limes, and a bowl of salt. That night I fell asleep, BOB falling from my fingers, and even though I had been thoroughly buzzed, I was still in desperate need of relief.

E/N So there it is, the first chapter. I hope you enjoyed it, let me know and thank you for reading! :D