I suppose that now that you've learned all about my goddamn life, you want to know if I was changed and all. Now if ya really wanna know about how that fateful day went, you can just guess for yourself, because I'm not going to tell to you. But I will tell you how things went after I got out of that helluva a rehab. While I was in rehab, I thought. I thought a lot. About what, you don't wanna know. It's boring. But I did realize that I'm a phony. A goddamn phony. I learned to accept it though. I guess that's a good thing. The people there let me have visitors once in a while. D.B. often came over. And Phoebe came over every once in a while. She was still writing in her notebooks. That killed me. Gosh, she was still so cute.
The first thing I did was call up old Jane. She was sure glad to hear from me. I invited her out west to visit me and D.B. Once she got there, she told me to think about getting an education. Boy, that old Jane can really convince you to do something. Anyways, I went to another of those whatchamacallit, prep schools, called Midland School in California. I finished school there and ended up applying to Harvard and Yale, ya know those big, phony Ivy League schools. I was accepted into both, and decided to go to Yale, where Jane ended up, too. So, anyway, once I got to my room at Yale and all, and what do ya know, the old Ackley kid is my roommate! Oh, how I really did miss that Ackley kid. He and I became the best of friends. I know, that's a phony thing to say, but it's very true. I was in education classes, Jane was in medical school, and Ackley was in law school. Anyways, many years later, he, Jane, and I all graduated at the top of our classes. I didn't think I could do it, but I sure did.
It's been about twelve years since I got kicked out of Pencey, ten years since I left rehab, and only five years since old Jane and I got married. It was a beautiful wedding. Ackley was my best man. You should have seen it, you really should have. We have two kids: a son and a daughter. Our son's name is Allie, and boy, he has red hair just like my brother's was. Our daughter's name is Jenny, and she's a little ball of energy. She looks just like me, Jane says. That killed me. Old Jane and I live far away from the city; we're actually right near D.B. Sometimes, we'll take the children to New York, and other times, Mom, Dad, and Phoebe come out to visit.
So I suppose you wanna know what we've been up to. Old Jane is a pediatric nurse at the nearby hospital. Allie and Jenny are both starting school soon. And me? I'm now teaching History and Literature at St. Andrews Prep School out in California. As I look out over my class each day, I can't help but wonder if there is a Holden Caulfield out there. If there is, well, is he another catcher in the rye?