Author's Note: I really like this story. Here is one last chapter looking a bit into the future. Thanks for reading :)
The sunlight seeped through the window and hit me directly in the face. I'd fallen asleep in my room for the first time in a year. Usagi and Nii-chan had been talking late into the night. I'd left them alone because I thought that was my best option at the time. Although I was curious I was also scared. It all started with a call yesterday morning...
Nii-chan had called that morning. "You said you'd visit often. You haven't been here in a month Misaki."
"I know Nii-chan I've just been a little busy. I got a job at Usagi's publishing company to help out. I feel useless just doing nothing." He sighed.
"I'm coming to visit today and there's nothing you can say to stop me. I'll see you later." He hung up without waiting for my answer. I'd immediately freaked out. Usagi watched me with an amused look on his face.
"What's wrong?" I came over and sat down. I put my head in my hands.
"Nii-chan is coming here because I haven't visited." He gave me a look.
"I thought you went to see him a couple of times already." I hated lying to anyone, but every time I boarded the train to Nii-chan's I would get there and stand outside. I never went in. I'd walk around the neighborhood and go to the bookstore. I'd do anything but what I was supposed to be doing.
"I did...but I could never knock on the door..." Usagi grabbed my chin and kissed me with bone breaking pressure. It somehow helped me get grounded. Helped me clear my head. "I should cook dinner...and clean up." I looked around and looked at the research materials piled high around the room in corners and all over tables.
"I'll help the best I can." Usagi got up and began to gather his things.
Misaki was stressed out. I watch him scrub the floor with more force than necessary. Sometimes he would stop and sigh. I could see him breathing rapidly, looking around the room. I watched the frustrated tears form, and then he'd get back to work. The kitchen smelled like a five-star restaurant, he look polished and clean, and yet I watched him to mundane things like dust, air out carpets, and straighten bookshelves.
I followed him up to his room quietly. He left the door slightly cracked, I watched as he paced back and forth and then to my amazement punched the wall. I looked at what used to a perfectly nice wall, the hole was small. Misaki made a frustrated noise and plopped down on the bed with his head in his hands. I realized after a minute he was crying. I opened the door slowly. He looked up and tried to wipe the tears away. I held him close. "Don't worry."
Usagi's lips traveled softly up my neck to my lips, but his hands held my wrists tightly. I could barely breathe, just as I was about to push him away the doorbell rang saving me. His eyes said he wasn't done with me and he didn't care who was here. I stood up and straightened myself up. I flexed my hand which was bright red now. I could see where the bruises were going to form. I took one last look at Usagi and walked downstairs hearing him behind me not to long after.
Dinner was going fine. Nii-chan had brought Manami along so things weren't as awkward as I'd anticipated. Usagi said nothing about me going to Nii-chan before, just backed up the story that I was busy making a career for myself. His hand rested on my leg underneath the table. Somehow I ended up gripping his hand, sometimes so tightly I got scared I might hurt him. He would glance at me with those eyes...the eyes that protected me from everything. For some reason I wasn't reassured things would be fine, I couldn't get comfortable. He saw the worry in my eyes and it echoed in his own eyes. "I'll get dessert."
"I don't know if I can eat anything else." Manami patted her stomach and laughed. It was warm and didn't seemed to match the atmosphere at all.
"I know you'll like it." I put on my best smile, but it just felt like I was going to break into little pieces. I hurried to the kitchen. I grabbed a glass and filled it with freezing water. I downed the cup and was on my second when I felt Usagi's strong arms around me. I breathed in his scent and leaned against him.
"You're doing fine." I took another deep breath, let his scent fog my thoughts. Usagi took the dessert tray before I could grab it. The glass of water was shaking violently in my hands.
I'd originally got up to help Misaki. I watched as Usagi kissed him and turned away. So this was what was going on here. I knew it wasn't just friendship. He was after my brother now. I watched as Misaki walked out followed by Usagi holding a try with small cakes. No wonder why he looked a wreck all night. "Can we talk Usagi?" He glanced at me with an annoyed look on his face but followed me with a smile. Misaki looked between the two of us with wide eyes. I tried to ignore him and not feel guilty.
"I'm taking him back home." He'd said like it was already decided.
"No you're not." I crossed my arms and leaned against the wall. We were in the hallway. I knew Misaki was panicking inside because he knew this was what was going to happen tonight. "He doesn't even want to go with you. All those times he tried to visit he couldn't even walk inside." Takahiro looked hurt, but I wanted to hurt him. I wanted to punch him in the face. I wanted to do horrible things to him. I wanted to insult the girl he loved like he insulted Misaki. I settled on using words as my weapons.
"This relationship you have with him isn't healthy. It's not going on any longer." I clenched my fists.
"He is old enough to make his own decisions. Why don't we ask him?" Takahiro nodded and opened the door. It almost shut in my face before I walked in. He was acting like a little kid. Like him getting to Misaki a couple of seconds before me really matter. I was annoyed so I shoved passed him and sat next to Misaki on the couch. He was listening to Manami chat away about work and other things he probably didn't care about.
"Takahiro would like to know if you'd like to go back with him." Misaki looked up like he got slapped.
I didn't want to go back with Nii-chan even though it made me feel guilty. I wanted to stay here with Usagi. Although every fiber of my being fought it at first I was in love and there was nothing I could do about it. Making me choose sides was childish and whatever choice I made still made me lose in someway. "I...want to stay here." Nii-chan looked angry for the first time in a while. "I know you'll never understand because you left such a brilliant, amazing, and loving person behind, but that was your choice. Not mine. I can't leave." Usagi looked as shocked as Nii-chan. "I know you're not stupid Nii-chan. You've know what was going on this whole time. You had to. And I don't care how you feel. It's about how I feel." I got up. "I'm going to sleep now." I dragged myself up the stairs and plopped into the bed fully clothed.
That leads us to now. I laid there staring up at the ceiling. I was trying to find the will to get up when Usagi came him. Last night I was pretty sure I had a panic attack when I shut the door. Looking around this were knocked off the shelves from where I fell over. It looked horrible. Usagi looked around with that worried look on his face, his eyes met mine and he just stared for a while. "Come on." He picked me up and walked to his room.
He took my clothes off slowly but methodically, almost like a robot. I could hear the bath running in the background. Once I was sitting inside the tub he started washing my hair. "Takahiro won't be coming back here. It seems we couldn't reach any agreement." He looked worn out, sad, lost, and tired. I stood on my knees and wrapped my arms around him, kissed his cheek softly.
"We both knew how it'd end up." I couldn't understand why Takahiro was hurting. I might never understand. And maybe I was too open-minded, too comfortable. To him this wasn't normal and it wouldn't ever be. Before Usagi came into my life he was in Nii-chan's and their friendship ended for the same reason I was with Usagi. Love. I wasn't scared though. And that was the only difference.
I took my time unbuttoning Usagi's shirt while he stared at me with a confused look. I pushed it down, took a minute to watch his chest rise and fall. We were breathing, I could feel him, I could smell him, hear him. This was beautiful. No one could understand unless they'd been through the same thing. I wasn't ashamed. I wasn't scared. I wasn't running anymore. The brilliance of this moment was enough to blind someone but not me. As he touched me, kissed me, and half of the water in the tub ended up on the floor...I couldn't help but think to myself...aren't I so lucky...
I could only think that I was lucky that'd I'd fallen for him. This beautiful, courageous, and brilliant person. My new sun. The new center to my universe. Every star in my sky. My oxygen, my dreams, my life, my night, my day. Mine. All for me. I'd discovered what others called the one person for them, their soul mate. I wasn't going to let him go for anyone. Like a romantic teenager, I'll live in a dream. And I'm okay with that. This dream is my reality.