The Definition of Family

by jabotus

Disclaimer: Characters are not mine.

Time Frame: Mid Season 6

Warnings: Dean/Castiel slash eventually. Similar stories probably have been done before, but well who cares, this is my version. Don't like slash, don't read.

Summary: Dean finally comes to terms with his feelings for Cas, only Cas doesn't seem to care. Dean deals with the rejection by throwing himself into hunting, much to Sam's concern. Then the brothers meet Amber, a 7-year-old with nobody left to call family.

"Cas, we need to talk," Dean said to an empty motel room. After a pause, he added "please." Dean paced the small room, trying to will Cas there. They didn't have much time before Sam came back with lunch and it had already taken him ten minutes to bring himself to pray to Castiel. And there was no way he was going to have this conversation in front of his brother. It would be difficult enough telling Cas he finally...

"Hello Dean." Dean spun around to see Cas standing by the window.

"You're here?" A part of Dean had wished the angel was too busy so he would have a reason to delay this conversation.

"You said we need to talk." Cas looked tense and tired. He usually did these days, what with the civil war in heaven going on.

"Um, yeah." Dean couldn't even meet the blue eyes focused on him.

Probably a warning for why he shouldn't be doing this, but he needed to get this out. He'd been thinking about it constantly since last week after what that waitress said. Of course it took an outsider to point it out to him, what with his serious case of denial. Because her off-hand comment about what a cute couple he and his boyfriend were was nothing he hadn't heard before. Dean had lost count of how many people thought he and Sam were a couple. Except he wasn't with Sam. He'd been with Cas. And the easy-going waitress had obviously seen something between them. Possibly something like the stares or the lingering touches, or butterflies in his stomach. How could she even know about the butterflies? Denial was his first instinct, and he kindly corrected her. Castiel had said nothing and as soon as she left their table, he began discussing the case again.

Dean should have forgotten about it. Usually did...but he couldn't this time because this time it was Cas. This time there was some truth in what the waitress had picked up on. So he decided to give up on denial and was startled to find the idea didn't disgust him. At all. So apparently he was bisexual. Nothing wrong with that. Nope, nothing wrong at all except for the little detail that the feelings were for an Angel of the Lord.

"Dean, is there something you need?" An impatient Angel of the Lord. Cas's tone implied Dean had interrupted something important, again, but Cas had still shown up. Whatever was going on upstairs, Cas had dropped it, just to respond to Dean's prayer. It had to mean something, right?

"Yeah. Sort of. I wanted to tell you something." Dean met Cas's unwavering stare. Cas had the most incredible blue eyes he'd ever seen. Okay, he was officially a sap and there was no way he could discard this anymore. If it became way beyond awkward, he'd just tell Cas it was a joke or he lost a bet, but he would at least give it a try.

"We're friends, right Cas."

"Yes." Dean could tell by Cas's expression, he had no idea where this was going.

"Well, sometimes this changes. People want more than friendship." A pause. This was it. "I want more than friendship."

Cas continued to stare without blinking. Surprisingly, Dean had grown accustomed to this. He went on, "Yeah, so I thought maybe we could go out and get something to eat tonight...just the two of us."

"I do not require food."

"I know, but we could talk, get to know one another better." Dean winced. Oh yes, he didn't sound like an idiot at all. The last time he'd been this nervous asking someone out was back in 5th grade. What was wrong with him?

Cas only furrowed his brows. Dean's gaze dropped to the ground and he turned away. Maybe if he wasn't staring at Cas, he could get his words out. He didn't notice Cas tilting his head up, his eyes getting a faraway look in them as he spoke to his brothers and sisters.

"A date, Cas. I want to go out on a date. Dinner, and then maybe to that bar we passed coming into town. We could have a few beers and I can show you how to play pool. Just hang out without Sam." Dean turned hopeful eyes toward Cas who only caught the last bit. "So what do you say, Cas?"

Cas frowned. "I do not approve of playing your kind of games."

"It's not a game Cas! I...I'm not sure what it is, but it's not a game. I'm not using you for an experiment. I'm not going to deny my feelings any longer. I want us to be something more."

Cas looked slightly confused. "Perhaps you should find someone else to play games with tonight. I have more important matters to attend to." And with a rustling of feathers, Cas was gone.

Dean stared at the spot Cas had been standing. So that's how it was going to be. Cas wasn't even going to acknowledge his feelings. Dean felt a tightening pang in his chest. He had screwed up yet another relationship. Truth be told, he wasn't surprised. Obviously he wasn't cut out for this shit. Being a part of a family, that is. And the reason for failure every single time was him. Either he pushed them away or asked for more than what they were willing to give. So how could it be a surprise that everybody leaves him in the end?

"Dean?" Dean jerked at the sound of Sam's voice. He didn't bother to respond, only turned to grab his jacket. He needed to get drunk. Now.

"Keys." Dean held out his hand as he moved toward the door.

"What happened Dean?"

"Nothing happened. I just want to get out of this stuffy room for a few hours." Dean glared at his little brother, daring him to ask again.

"I have lunch." Sam held up the take-out bag.

"Keys. And I'm not asking again."

A concerned Sam dropped the impala keys into Dean's palm.

"What about the case? I found..."

"Not now, Sam." Dean interrupted. "Not now."

The door slammed shut behind him.