A/N: my first cross-over. You can call this a bit crack-y so expect a bit OOCness. And yeah, expect confusion. Chamber of secrets and the philosopher's stone together? Okay, so I'm just sharing what I wrote down a couple of years ago so don't hurt me. I'm still trying to improve here.

Disclaimer: I certainly don't own any of these two awesome titles.


My name is Harry Potter.

Hello, Harry Potter. My name is Tom Riddle.

Do you know anything about the chamber of secrets?

Yes.

Can you tell me?

No…

But I can show you…

"Aaaaaaaaaaahhhhh!"


"Where am I?"

"OUCH!"

"W-Who are you?"

"I should be asking you that!"

"Where am I?"

"You're pretty weird. What's this stick?"

"It's a wand. So… who are you?"

"I'm the famous Fullmetal Alchemist!"

"Alchemist? You must be Nicolas Flamel!"

"Who the heck is that?"

"Wow, I was expecting you to be really old. Something might be wrong from the book. That genius alchemist was actually short?"

"WHO THE HELL ARE YOU CALLING SHORT, YOU JERK!"

WHAM!


The next day, Harry was seen in the hospital wing, his body uninjured, his sanity… well, fortunately he's still alive. Neville Longbottom reported that he saw Harry come out from a diary and after he got up, he started screaming things like "the alchemist-who-must-not-be-named-because-I-don't-even-know-his-name is ALIVE! And a million times scarier than Voldemort! OMG, it's the end of the world!"


Meanwhile, somewhere out there, a confused Tom Riddle scratched his hair.

"Oops. I guess he ended up in the wrong place. My bad." Shrugging, he walked away to do whatever he needed to do.

"Oh well."


A/N: Told'ya it's cracked. I think this is my first crack (excluding the other lot of crap I made that I wasn't intending to be crack but ended up like, what I said,… crap). And Ed not knowing who Flamel was? Puh-leease… check out the episode where he and Al were deciphering Marcoh's research (I'm talking about brotherhood, `kay?)

I know my errors. Like it, hate it, whatever it, reviews are always welcome~