"Where are my children?"
"Where are they?"
"They're right here. What…?"
"If a hair on either of their heads is out of place, I will have you drawn and quartered. Don't think I can't make that happen."
"Do you honestly believe I will not report this to the police? Do you think since I let you off the hook after Paris that I would forgive any possible infraction? Let me speak to my girls…now."
"Ok, sure… Here, your mom wants to talk to you."
"Caroline, are you all right?"
"Yeah. We're great."
"Where are you?"
"I don't really know. We're camping. We're going to hike the Appalachian Trail."
"What is going on?"
"Cass and I ran into Andy on the way home from school. She was packing up a car with all sorts of camping gear. She said she was taking off for a long weekend with the holiday on Monday and Cass asked if we could join her. Cass was only joking, really, but Andy said if it was ok with you, we could go."
"It is not 'ok' with me."
"Yeah, we figured. I sort of faked a call and said it was cool."
"You did what?"
"I pretended to call you and then I said you were fine with us going along. Andy was really surprised that you said yes, but I poured it on kind of heavy with the begging and she figured I wore you down. So she drove us by home and we packed up and headed out."
"Caroline, I am beyond…"
"I know. I figured as much. But, we decided it was a case of easier to ask for forgiveness than permission."
"Caroline Ann, you and your sister…."
"We know. But it is so worth it. This camping stuff is awesome."
"Let me speak with your sister."
"Here, Cass. Mom want to talk to you."
"Hi mom, what's up?"
"Are you serious? Do you have any idea…?"
"Mom, we're fine. We were going to call you later tonight to let you know."
"Which one of you sent me the text?"
"That was Caroline. She thought if you at least knew we were with Andy, you wouldn't panic."
"So a text that simply stated 'I have your girls. I'll call you later' was supposed to keep me from panicking?"
"Really? That's what she wrote? Wow, she was a real moron with that one."
"Cassidy, this is not funny. None of it."
"Mom, we're fine. We're having a good time. And, we're with Andy. You know she wont let anything happen to us."
"How would I know that? I have not even seen the woman for the last seven years."
"But you know her. You know she would die to protect us. So don't worry. We'll be home on Monday afternoon."
"Let me speak with Andréa."
"Um… ok. I just have to find her. She went to gather some wood for the fire… oh wait, here she comes now. Here Andy. Mom wants to talk to you."
"Where are you?"
"We're in Kent, Connecticut."
"Macedonia Brook State Park."
"Do not move."
"Miranda?… Miranda? Oh crap. What did you two do?"
"It's not what you think."
"No? Tell me, what am I thinking, Cassidy?"
"You're thinking that we lied to go camping with you."
"And you believe you can prove me wrong?"
"Well, sort of. It was Caroline that lied. I just went along."
"Not funny. And how exactly did your mother know to call me?"
"Well, when we stopped for gas, I sort of borrowed your phone and texted her."
"Oh my god. So she had no clue about any of this?"
"Not really. I only said you had us and would call later."
"Shit. I can not believe this. I am so dead."
"If it's any consolation, we're dead too."
"Andy, don't worry. Mom has plenty of time to calm down before she gets here. It'll be ok."
"Cassidy, I don't think she's going to be calming down. If anything, I expect her to be so far beyond reasonable…"
"Let's not dwell on it. We have. Like, three hours. Let's enjoy it while we can."
"You guys… I can not believe what you get away with. Fine, let's start the fire. We can at least offer your mom some dinner when she gets here."