by Yui Shunrei Ryuzaki
Disclaimer: Otogi Zoshi and its original characters isn't mine.
A/n: Written on POV. Character subject to OOC. Might contain grammatical errors ahead. I'm really sorry.
She walked the path that I carefully planned and constructed. With a flute in her lips, arrow in her hands and tears in her eyes. This fine young woman who'd destroyed my plans and captivated my wicked heart. Minamoto no Hikaru. How amazingly strong she is, yet she's still vulnerable as a woman. While she sees the need that the people of the capital have for protection and fights for them, I see the corruption within the capital especially it's officials become worse. Our beliefs collided. Despite our love for each other, neither of us wants to give up one's principle.
Just when I thought that her brother, Raikou had pursued the path I made to obtain the magatama, I didn't expect that the Raikou that was on the quest was none other than his younger sister, Hikaru. Her petite body slyly concealed by his brother clothes, her moves were almost masculine. Imposing herself as her brother, Hikaru dismissed most of her feminine attributes.
In her journey, she met and fell in love with me. She confided herself unto me. She was able to be the both sides of herself-a woman and a warrior at once. How ironic it was. I was supposed to kill Raikou before yet I fell in love with this "Raikou" that I sent on a journey for my personal goals.
When was the exact time I fell in love, I don't know. Her strong personality, which generally reflects great kindness towards other people seemed to be one of her edge. Unlike the others, she's the only one I've seen good on that Heian period. I wondered, would she still love me if she found out my wicked side? My plans started to change. I wanted to save her and spare her life though I knew she wouldn't be happy if she continue her life with her goals unachieved. I love her yet my goals were my greatest priority.
I cared for her. I'd saved her several times. When those soldiers under Shutendouji tried to tainted her purity, I was there to protect her. At that moment, she let down her guards in front of me. I saw how fragile she was. I saw why I should protect her. Why Hikaru burden herself by protecting the capital which I despised the most? My love suffered because of my hatred yet I put my principle first before her.
Later on, when she'd an argument with her father, she ran away through the rain. She stumbled unto me and confided her worries. I remembered Raikou and how the both of us have similarities. We both love Hikaru though Raiko's was a brotherly love. Both of us hadn't really care what'll happen to the capital for we only wanted to protect Hikaru for her own happiness. But I knew I failed. The only difference between us was Raikou until the end put his love first for Hikaru above the rest which I didn't. I'd promised to protect her and always by her side. I'd always watched her from afar.
And then the time came when she'd to confront me as Abe no Seimei only to found out that it was me all along. I could see how dejected she was. She lost her beloved brother. She lost her faithful minions right before her eyes. Learning my identity, betrayal came to her. She was lost temporarily in her words but quickly claimed herself and turned against me. She tried to shoot me with an arrow but was constantly held back by her feelings. She told me to stop but I wasn't shaken by her demands to stop the destrucive spell that'll ruin the capital. She charged towards me with a dagger in her hands yet again she didn't killed me. In her last attempt to stop me, I was quite surprised. She started to play her flute with a sound I really loved. It seemed to me that she was sending an untold message. She loved me but then she have to save the people even if it costs her own life. Hikaru would never understand that even if my actions were evil, my goal was for the good. She refused to accept this and decided to turn against me.
She was able to stop me but at the cost of her life. The only life I wanted to spare. The only one I cared the most. Hikaru then apparently died in my arms and I followed her sooner.
And when I opened my eyes to see the world once again, my never ending life started. As if it was a punishment to me, destiny let me live forever without Hikaru, tormented by my memories of her, and let me see the consequences of the actions I made everyday for all eternity. I knew that one day she'll comeback to me so I spent several centuries all over Japan just to find her. When I found her, I knew she didn't remember me or our past lives and it was an another punishment. She might not the same person I fell inlove with and she slightly differs but still I knew she's my Hikaru.
My regret? I didn't regret that I tried to destruct the capital one thousand years ago. My only regret was Hikaru. Because I let her die. Because I took everything she cherished. I knew inspite of her rebirth, Hikaru will never accept any reasons I have but the same thing she believed in her past life. I regret that I wasn't able to put my love for her first and because of that I lost her and everything I had.
When I found her, I have a chance to make everything right for. My goal changed. I wanted her happiness and safety above the rest. It wasn't being with her or make her fall inlove with me once again but to make thing right for her own good. I knew that everything that happened to her in our past life might happen once again in this modern era. Hikaru had suffered enough and I'm the only one who could help her. Wishing that I could spend my remaining time to be with her was quite impossible. My sins forbid me to be with her. So even if all I can do is to protect and guide her, then that'll I do.
Finally, I restored what Hikaru lost before. She have everything once again except me. I wonder, Will she ever try to forget me? To continue living her life without my existence, she must for my time has come to let go of her. My almost eternal punishment is over. I'll vanish in this world but my love for her remains. Only in dreams I could touch her once again. Only in dreams, she's mine and I am hers. A blithe ignorance I had for the world. A deep short romance with her, Hikaru had changed everything including me.
A/n: I know it's so lame. I'm sorry. I'll try to fix it or revise it as soon as I have time to do so. Mansairaku seems OOC here. XD. I wonder if I should write Hikaru's. I'm a little inspired to write this one shot after reading the manga version of Otogi Zoshi and evaluating Mansairaku and Hikaru's relationship.
Thank you for reading. A word or feedback will be nice.
~Yui Shunrei Ryuzaki