Authors note: this is my first fic so be kind but critical and please review even if you arent a member!

Takes place after mockingjay but before the epilouge so there are some spoilers for the last book dont read if you havent read mockingjay. Disclaimer: If I owned the hunger games i wouldnt be writing fanfiction.


Its been two years since I left the Capitol. District twelve is empty except for Greasy Sae, her grand-daughter, Haymitch and me of course. Peeta hasn't come back, Gale went to live in district two, and my mother... My mother stayed in the capitol. She has deserted me again but this time Peeta isn't here to save me.

I'm an idiot for not admitting that I love Peeta. Now that hes gone I realize how much I miss him, like the last time. Sometimes I wonder what would have happened if I took the nightlock back in the first games. I dont feel like myself anymore and I absoultly hate it, I want things to go back to normal, but I cant seem to force myself to go out.

I've settled into another mental state, . I live in his house, I haven't left it since the day after I returned. Greasy Sae brings me food twice a day. But I don't let anyone in Peeta's kitchen so she makes it next door and brings me a bowl. I eat and go back to cleaning the house, it comforts me for some reason, knowing if he came back everything is clean and in place. Then I crawl under the covers on his bed with my pearl and locket and lay there until I fall into a nightmare filled sleep. In the morning I get up shower and dress in a one of his shirts and a pair of pants cinna made for me, after the first game. His clothes still smell like him; Vanilla and bread. I put my locket back on and pick up the pearl. These two things will not leave my sight and they haven't since he gave them to me. I go and cry in the living room until Sae comes over with lunch. I don't speak with anyone anymore; I am considered a mental avox again. After she leaves I return to the couch until she comes back with dinner. I repeat the schedule day after day.

Then, the time comes I decide I'm not going to get out of bed other than to lock the doors. Sae comes like always but ends up leaving since she cant get insde. Its been three days since I got out of bed and I'm burning with fever. I know I'm dying and I can accept it. Around dinner time someone comes to peetas house I expect its Sae and that she will go away but this person gets key to this house. That is until the stranger is banging on the door yelling for me to come out. I know that voice anywhere. Peeta' s back. I want to get up and let him in but my body is too weak. But I do, for the first time in months, speak.

"Peeta! That cant be you. Of all times to possibly come back why now"

" Thank god your alive in there. Im coming in Katniss and your not going to stop me."

"I dont think I could stop you if I wanted to," I say with a sigh.

I'm surprised he manages to get it open in only a few miniutes with out breaking it entirely.

"Katniss!" he says and rushes over to me. "Whats wrong with you! Starving yourself and not letting anyone in!" he says angry I was causing myself harm. That's when I start thinking.'This has happened before, in nightmares.'

"NO! This is another nightmare! Peeta doesn't care about me! He doesn't love me now that I love him! Your just here to break my heart like I broke his. He thought I pretended to care."

By the end of that rant I'm sobbing. Peeta's expression softens, he comes over and lays next to me pulling me into his embrace.

" Katniss I'm really back they just let me out of the hospital yesterday. I took the first train I could back to twelve. When I went to your house and couldn't find you I started looking around for you that's when I ran into Sae. She looked worried and told me everything when I asked where you were."

" Exactly how much is everything?" I asked

" Lets see. You not leaving here and not talking only eating what you had to how you have been occupying your time cleaning."

I'm still not sure so I start asking questions.

"Your back, real or not real?" " Real"

"This is my worst nightmare real or not real?"

"Not real Katniss not real."

I looked up into his eyes and I could tell he was really back. The clouded look that he inherited from the hijacking is gone from them and all I see is the beautiful blue,the perfect match to district fours oceans. For the first time since Prims' death I smile. Peeta takes care of me until I'm better and I know now nothing bad is going to happen, aside from him possible attacking me, so I ask:

"They cured you of the hijacking real or not real?"

His response makes my heart sore,

"Real, they did for the most part I still have flash backs, but I can tell if they're real of not."

" You love me real or not real" he asks

"So very real" I say tears filling my eyes, "Stay with me"

"Always" he whispers to me.

Thank you for reading it means alot. Please review and tell me if i should continue. Im also writing an avatar: the last air bender zutara fan fic so check that out too. :) 3

Thanks for reading and reveiwing

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