His head was pounding. The dim light was bothering his sensitive eyes and he felt something heavy on his chest. England slowly opened his eyes, blinking slowly to make sure he got used to the light. The first thing he noticed was the ceiling, it seemed that he was not at his house. Looking then at the weight above his chest, he realizes it's actually an arm, and it belongs to a naked America who is still sleeping beside him. On his other side lays an also sleeping and equally naked France snuggling another blond that England swears he knows but cant really name, something that started with a C, like Canaka, or Canade.
England slowly lifts the Americans arm and tries to move out of the bed without waking the others. It was bad enough to wake up naked with a hangover, but to wake up naked with a hangover and someone else was worst, to wake up naked with a hangover besides France was equal to a nightmare, but to wake up besides three different naked bodies with France being one of them meant England really needed to have some tea before he willed himself to process what had happened the night before.
England had managed to locate a pair of boxers and pants, but sadly no shirts, and had dressed himself with those before opening the door and leaving the room that he now could recognize as belonging to the French man laying in bed. Lying on the hallways floor and promptly blocking England's way, was a sleeping Switzerland, who was currently snoring loudly snuggling a water gun, and wearing nothing but sparkling booty shorts. England made a mental note to leave before he woke up. Quietly and carefully England passed the sleeping Swiss and kept heading to the kitchen for his much needed morning tea.
He was one room closer to reaching his goal, England was now standing in France's living room, and he once again made a mental note to leave as soon as he had his tea. Sleeping in the living room, was Germany, dressed in sparkling booty shorts much similar to those worn by Switzerland, and rubber boots? Sleeping on top of said German was Italy, somehow wearing a fedora hat and a tie but nothing else. On the other couch, was Austria and Prussia both wearing the same attire as Germany, and Hungary snuggling with both of them, with also had similar attire, but she had managed to keep a top on and had a pink fluffy feather scarf around her neck.
Finally reaching the kitchen England almost felt that his day would make a bit more sense before he tossed those hopes out the window and decided that maybe, just maybe, he really didn't need tea and should just leave. The kitchen was a mess, tomatoes where everywhere. Spain was soundly sleeping above the table with a rarely seen smiling sleeping South Italy under his arms. Both were covered in tomatoes and tomato sauce, England wasn't sure how, but Spain had "MY PROPERTY" spelled on his ass. Belgium was sleeping under the table, also covered in tomatoes, and lacking a shirt or top. If England had been any less of a gentleman he would have kept staring at her perfectly visible and very alluring breasts. But since he was a gentleman he opened a drawer where he knew France kept some kitchen cloths, picked a clean cloth big enough to cover her chest, and carefully covered her before he went searching for tea and a kettle.
England had just filled the kettle with water and was going to heat it up for his tea when he glanced outside the window, looking into the France's front yard. Sleeping on the grass without a shirt but still with his scarf was Netherland and besides him was Lichtenstein, she was snuggling on Netherland while he hold her protectively. England sent a heartfelt prayer for Netherland that Switzerland didn't wake up anytime soon.
When the kettle started to whistle quietly England thought it would be a better idea not to drink his tea in the kitchen but rather in the back yard, that way he wouldn't wake up Spain or South Italy, he was sure that if either of them woke up it would be enough chaos for the rest of the house to wake up and that was the last thing he wanted, especially with the hangover he had at the moment. So he set the kettle and a tea cup on a tray and headed to the back yard's porch.
Passing the living room once again, England noticed that none of the German nations seemed like waking up anytime soon, and the amount of beer bottles scattered around the couches and the center table made England sure that he wouldn't be the only one with a hang over that day. Once outside, England set the tray with his tea on the small table of the porch and sat down tiredly beside it. He had to admit that the back garden was quite pleasant when its owner was not around to annoy him. England had just poured some tea in his cup and was about to finally sip some of that precious liquid that would give his morning some normality when he heard a window opening from the house and he saw France poking his head out the window. Obviously the French man saw him, smiling he signaled that he was going down and moved away from the window. England took his cup and chugged his tea in one go, if France was coming he needed his tea now.
He was already on his third cup of tea when France stepped outside wearing only old jeans and sat opposite side to England. "Bonjour Angleterre." "Frog." France just sat there smiling and England was grateful for that, he wanted to avoid dealing with a hangover and the French at the same time for the moment. But it didn't last long, for France's face suddenly looked puzzled after glancing to the garden. "Angleterre, is that Russia sleeping on my flowers?" England glanced at the direction France pointed out, and indeed there laid Russia in the middle of France's roses, how had he not noticed that before? Russia seemed normal at least, he wasn't missing any article of clothing or wearing anything exotic like the rest of the people in the house, he was just sleeping in the rose bushes. "Just what the bloody hell happened last night?"
"Je suis desole mon ami, but my memory of last nights party is still a bit hazy." England glared at France, but since he actually seemed to be telling the truth he let it slip for now, he also couldn't remember a thing about last night. But then again, now that the France had mentioned a party he remembered that he had indeed been invited for one, it was suppose to be one of the Bad Touch Trio's famous wild bashes. He had refused to go to the party but America had proclaimed that being the "HERO" he would not let England be the only nation not to attend the bash and had promptly dragged him to the wild party.
"By the way mon cher, why are you not wearing a shirt?" France smirked, and his smirk grew even wider with England's death glare combined in his flushed face. "I didn't find a bloody shirt you wanker! But I could ask you the same thing frog." France just sighs softly and pushed his hair behind his ear. "I'm not wearing a shirt because I don't care for one mon lapin." France's smile while saying that made England want to bash the other's head in the table hard.
That was when they heard noises coming from Russia. The larger man was starting to move and had started to mumble something. Both France and England stiffened and hold their breath not really knowing what to expect. Russia sat up and started to look around. The minute he saw the two blonds he simply stud up and walked towards them. France and England shared a worried glace, before France took the initiative. "Bonjour Russie." Russia smiled his child like smile, he didn't seem hung over at all. "Доброе утро франция. Where am I?" France and England were relieved that Russia seemed to be in a good mood. He was not emitting his famous purple killing aura, or muttering kol kol kol under his breath.
England let France take care of the confused Russian while he tried to finally remember what had happened the night before. He remembered being dragged to the party by America, he remembered that almost all the nations had joined up for the party, even his brothers had come. He remembered Prussia being responsible for the bar and giving him some rum. And then it all became hazy. He could remember that at some point in the beginning of the party they had started a tag game and he got tackled by America once, he remembers this because somehow America had geared up in an American Football armor and helmet and it had hurt like hell to get tackled by him while he was wearing that gear. He also remembers that the other guy that he couldn't quite name yet had managed to tackle America right after and he also had geared up in a red and white hockey gear. In the middle of the game America had the guts to try to tackle Russia and made him drop his vodka bottle, chaos had been ensured then because Russia got out his water pipe. Somehow, the other one in hockey gear started to dual Russia with a hockey stick. England isn't sure if that happened or even what happened next but he is sure that they had started to take on bets at that point.
Then he remembered that there was music playing and that there was a stage. A bunch of the nations were taking turns choosing the songs and performing them on stage. He clearly remembers China, and the other Asians performing on stage to some song about kung-fu. He also remembers that at some point the Bad touch had jumped on stage and performed tree songs in a row, "I'm awesome", "The Boss", and "The creep" if he was not mistaken. Belarus and Ukraine had also performed singing something called "T.a.t.u" if he had heard Russia correctly. He could even swear that somehow he and his brothers had walked on stage together at one point and started singing "God save the queen".
And then things got interesting because it turned into a dance off. Korea and Japan where very exited performing a dance from some Asian band he had never heard about. Switzerland had taken the stage with Liechtenstein and started waltzing, Austria and Hungary soon joined them. He remembers Turkey jumping on the stage taking his shirt off and simply start belly dancing, Spain didn't seem pleased at that and invaded the stage with his former colonies from South America and the entire group started dancing shaking their asses to "Baby got back". England remembers this because he had at that moment believed that Spain's ass had to be the one best think that he and all his former colonies shared. It was hell from the on, South Italy was cursing every nation that dared stare and Spain.
Then his memories got even hazier, he remembers Russia on stage with Cuba singing and dancing, America getting pissed off at both of them and calling them "comies" before he also invaded the stage in a hero outfit he had pulled out of nowhere. Then France and the other French speaking nations were on stage singing something in both French and English while taking their shirts off and doing pelvis thrusts. He had been pissed of to the performance so he had made his way to the stage and promptly started performing something himself. Only to be interrupted by Prussia yelling "GERMAN SPARKLE PARTY!" and all German nations taking on the stage and dancing.
He couldn't really remember what happened next but he had glimpses of France making out with Russia in a corner, Hungary and Japan with their cameras out snapping photos of all the drunken nations, He and Spain running around in their pirate gears fighting against the Nordics that where dressed up as Vikings. The Italians had dressed up as the Mario brothers and where chasing imaginary monsters while Poland ran behind them claiming to be princes peach. The African nations had dressed up as tribal warriors and had started chasing America trying to get the white polar bear the he was holding in his arms. It had been a solid blur after that.
"Angleterre?" England snapped back from his memories. France stud beside him looking a bit puzzled and Russia was gone from sight. "What?" France sighs once again. " Angleterre, I'm taking Russie to the airport, so I was asking if you wanted a ride to the station as well?" England considered this for a moment, yes he wanted to leave before the others woke up, but being half naked, alone in the car with only France and Russia seemed a bit reckless. "I'm fine, I can leave on my own later." "D'accord." France walked back inside the house. England hoped that the French would have the decency to actually put a shirt on before leaving to house to drive Russia.
England stud up from his seat and picked up the tray with the tea set. He'd better find the rest of his cloths and figure out how to get back to his own house. Walking past the living room he noticed that none of the others seemed to have wakened up yet. The same thing for those sleeping in the kitchen. But peaking outside the kitchen window England noticed that Russia was now talking with a fully awakened Liechtenstein and Netherland on the front of the house.
England heard France's footsteps and saw as he walked outside, thankfully fully dressed, and started to talk with the other two, apparently also offering a ride to both of them. Netherland seemed to have accepted because he headed away with Russia and France but Liechtenstein turned back towards the house. And just as she was walking in England heard Belgium moving and waking up. Liechtenstein walked in the kitchen as Belgium was crawling from under the table while holding the cloth that covered her bare chest.
With a very flushed face England signaled for both girls to follow him quietly, and he headed to France's guest room where he guessed were some spare clothes for Belgium to wear. Upon opening the door he saw that the guest room had also been occupied by Monaco, Seychelles and Vietnam. The three female nations were all curled up together in the guest bed sleeping soundly. Belgium smiled at England, patting him with her spare hand on his naked shoulder and walked in with Liechtenstein. England closed the door leaving the girls alone and headed back to France's bedroom to search for his shirt and shoes.
The North American brothers where still sleeping, but both were snuggling on each other, England didn't want to disturb them so he silently searched for his shirt and shoes, achieving in finding his shoes, but not his shirt. He was sure he looked everywhere in the room, so his conclusion was that he had lost his shirt somewhere else. But he would rather die then head back home half naked so one of the frog's shirts was going to have to do it. England was very surprised when opening the closet he actually found not only his shirt, but the rest of the other nations clothes. The damned frog must have stolen and hidden them there.
He was now fully dressed and ready to leave. And while heading to the front door he heard Spain and South Italy waking up, Belgium seemed to have found a shirt and had started cleaning the kitchen with Lichtenstein's help. He walked in the kitchen and informed the ladies of France's location since he was about to leave. England could hear Switzerland waking up in the hallway and he wanted to be out the front door before the trigger happy nation was fully awake. Sure enough he had just left the house when he heard shouting and curses coming from the French nation's house, followed by even more shouting and cursing from different voices and languages. Considering all the nations that where inside the house and how all of them where hung-over, England was very happy to have escaped the chaos.
Thank you SafetyScissors for Reviewing and checking my spelling mistakes.