Ahaha! I'm so bad...instead of studying for an English exam tomorrow...I'm writing fanfiction=D Ah well! I should be fine! I have studiedXD

Well, here we go! Please enjoy and review!

...a Furniture Salesman...

Xanxus looked wearily at all the chairs and tables in front of him. He was supposed to be selling them, but he just couldn't be bothered. No one was going to buy them anyway. Not even one single customer came for the past few days. Why the hell would someone turn up now of all times? Well of course the answer to that was simple. Anyone who came in would find it hard choosing a piece of furniture with Xanxus glaring at them 24/7. Xanxus, who was supposed to be the "nice guy" and helping customers choose their ideal was sitting on one of the chairs himself and not giving a shit about anyone entering those doors. Who cares if they're customers? They're all pathetic scums anyways...entering this store in the first place.

Xanxus yawned and stood up to examine the furniture. With the usual look of disapproval. Chairs were scattered messily across the room. He went up to one chair that looked grand enough for him to sit in and sat down.

"Tch, what the hell is this? An arse warmer?" Xanxus shouted angrily and stood up, pulling his guns from his side pocket. Sure enough there was a warmer on the seat, hence the name "Backside Warmer for the elderly".

"What kind of half-assed name for a chair is this?" With that, he aimed his gun recklessly at the chair and fired both of his guns...and narrowly missing the "Arse Warmer". Now, whoever entered the store at that time was in for some extremely bad luck. Bad timing. The atmosphere changed in response to Xanxus's anger due to missing his target.

"U-uh...m-may I please take a look a-at some chairs, s-sir?"

"Get. Fucking. Lost. Trash," glowered Xanxus dangerously, causing the customer to flee in sheer terror. One valuable customer lost. Quite a loss there...it was his only hope after all. He hadn't made any profit since he opened the store. With the interference gone, Xanxus continued on firing at the "Arse Wamer".

"Don't you dare mess with me, trashy chair! Who's the elderly? Huh?" bellowed Xanxus, who had just finished firing at the "Arse Warmer". It was reduced to nothing but...a few ashes.

Since this just wasn't enough for him, he decided to shoot down all the remaining furniture. "I'll show you who's boss!"

Throughout his time spent firing, Xanxus muttered words along the lines of:

"I'm the boss here!"

"I'm younger than you think I am, dumbasses!"

"My arse is not worthy of your trash chairs!"

You guessed it. Instead of making a profit...Xanxus made a loss. An awfully bad one to add in.

NAME: Xanxus

OCCUPATION: Furniture Salesman



Any suggestions for other occupations? I will reconsider=D