A/N: Time for my annual One Piece retelling of a Simpsons Treehouse of Horror, this time with Zoro as the start instead of Luffy. I can't see Luffy as the victim, but I can see Zoro. Enjoy!
Disclaimer: I don't own One Piece or the Simpsons. If I did... then the Treehouse of Horror would be shown on or before Halloween.
Luffy: That one doesn't make any sense this year, it was shown last night... before Halloween.
Emma: Oh yeah...
Clown Without Pity: One Piece Style
By Emma Iveli
It was Luffy's birthday he was opening his presents, the first one was from Brook, which was box of money.
"Wow!" said Luffy, "Where did you get all this money?"
Nami glared at the skeleton as he explained, "I haven't earned it, I don't need… but if I miss one payment I'll hell!"
Everyone stared at the Skeleton confused.
"Where Zoro's present?" asked Luffy.
"D'oh! said Zoro, "I mean don't! Worry, I'll go get it right now!"
That was when he left.
"10 Berries says it's a sword." Said Sanji.
"You're on!" said Nami.
Zoro found a store that appeared to be selling strange objects.
"Hey I'm looking for something for my captain." Said Zoro, "Do you sell anything like that."
"We sell forbid objects from where men fear to tread." Said the shop keeper who then turned perky, "We also sell frozen yogurt, which I call frogurt!"
"So do you have a gift for my captain or not?" asked Zoro.
The shopkeeper began to hover over different items, such as a still beating heart and book entitled "My Immortal, Cupcakes and other tales that would make you want to destroy your brain." When he found a Buggy the Clown doll.
"Take this doll." Said the shop keeper.
"A Buggy the Clown doll! They make those?" asked Zoro surprised.
"But beware it carries a terrible curse." Said the shopkeeper.
"That's bad." Said Zoro.
"But it comes with a frogurt." Said the shopkeeper.
"That's good!" said Zoro.
"The frogurt is also cursed." Said the shopkeeper.
"That's Bad!" said Zoro.
"But it comes with a choice of free toppings!" said the shopkeeper.
"That's good." Said Zoro.
"The topping contains potassium benzoate." Said the shopkeeper.
There was a strange silence.
"That's bad." Said the shopkeeper.
"Can I go now?" asked Zoro who was getting iterated.
And so after placing the doll into it's box he back to the ship.
One the ship, Chopper was playing Pin the Tail on the Donkey when the door opened slamming it in his face.
"Happy Birthday Luffy." Said Zoro.
Luffy opened it and saw it.
"Great Ryuma's ghost a Talking Buggy doll!" said Luffy, "This is awesome!"
He pulled the string, "Big nose! Did you just call me a big nose?" said the doll.
"They made a talking Buggy doll?" asked Nami in disbelief, "That's… strange…"
"That doll is evil!" yelled Usopp, "Evil! Evil I tell you!"
"You've been saying that about all the presents." Said Nami.
"I just want attention." Mumbled Usopp.
The next day Zoro was just lying on the deck when he saw the clown doll, he shrugged and pulled the string.
"I'm Buggy the Clown and I don't like you." Said the doll.
"That does sound like something he would say." Said Zoro with a shrug laying back down.
"I'm Buggy the Clown and I'm going to kill you." Said the doll.
Zoro raised an eyebrow, "I didn't even pull the string." He said.
"I said I'm going to kill you! Roronoa Zoro!" said the Clown Doll.
Zoro punched him away, "Oh yeah, with what?" asked Zoro.
That was when the doll came back with a giant knife, he reached for his swords but they weren't there… so he screamed.
The rest of the crew saw Zoro cowering pointing at the doll.
"That doll is trying to kill me." Cried Zoro pointing at the now unmoving doll.
"Looks like he finally snapped." Said Sanji.
"Why else would he be acting OOC." Said Franky.
They all left, Buggy he Doll began to walk towards Zoro, laughing , menacingly that was until the pull string retracted all the way, he tried to pull it out again, so he pointed at it, Zoro shrugged and pulled it causing the evil clown doll to start laughing again.
IT was unknown how Zoro escaped, but either way he taking a bath, just signing a song. As it time to himself he sang a certain song… not his own personal song "Eyes of Zoro" but rather something else…
"Winter wrap up, winter wrap up, cause tomorrow spring is here." Sang Zoro.
Anyways, as Zoro was taking his bath, suddenly Buggy the Doll came out the water holding a harpoon, Zoro screamed and ran out of the bathroom naked.
As it turns out on deck, a fight was just begging with Smoker's marines.
"Straw Hat! It's time I arrest you!" said Smoker.
"I'd like to see you try." Said Luffy.
That was when Zoro ran across naked, one of the name less marines did a wolf whistle as he ran past them.
Tashigi was blushing bright red.
"I… I have to go use the bathroom." Said Tashigi.
"Wow… that's something I'd expect Luffy or Franky to do." Said Sanji lighting up one of his cigarettes.
"Yeah…" said Nami nursing a headache.
"I… I think we should cancel this fight." Said Smoker.
"Okay." Said Luffy.
Sometime after Zoro embarrassed himself, Buggy the Doll was in the men's cabin, putting the moves on Brook's… um… not a Barbie doll.
Why does he have a Barbie doll? Just… don't ask…
"Hey baby…" said Buggy the Doll, "Oh a Cheerleader."
That was when Zoro came into the room with a sack filled with dirty socks and put Buggy the Doll into it.
"You think you're dirty socks can stop me?" asked buggy the Doll, "Well they are making me woozy…"
Zoro proceeded to bash the doll with base bat for good measure. He then placed it into a suit case and locked up the suit case.
At it turned out the island they were docked on had a bottomless pit.
"Good bye Dolly!" said Zoro as he dumped the suit case.
Turns out a lot of people used this bottomless put.
"Arrivederci Vino." Said Capone Bege using the pit before leaving.
"What was I think?" asked a guy with a box of photographs, "Who would even want nude picture of Lola anyways?
He tossed the box into the put only for it come back.
"What the!" said the guy.
That was the power of those disgusting photos.
Anyways back to the story.
When Zoro got back to the ship turns out Buggy the Doll had escaped somehow… He jumped on Zoro's head shouting "Guess who moss head!" while blocking his eyes
IT was then that they finally saw the doll was tying to kill Zoro.
"The doll's trying to kill me and the figurehead's been laughing at me…" said Zoro.
With he figure head…
"He he… Zoro's head does look like moss." It said.
Buggy the Doll tackled Zoro to the ground and tried to drown Zoro in a mop bucket.
"Eww… mop water…" said Zoro.
Robin found the box and saw there was a number to call if there were emergencies. She went over the snail phone.
"Hello the Buggy the Clown hotline." Said the operator.
"Your doll is trying to kill my crew mate." Said Robin.
"One moment please." Said operator.
The song "Everybody loves a clown." Robin couldn't help to smile at the humor in playing that song.
Sometime later, a man from the company showed up as it was trying to pull Zoro's tongue out.
"You're the straw hat pirates and you're letting a doll beat you up?" asked the man, "Never mind, I don't want to question this."
The man grabbed the doll and lifted it's shirt.
"Here your problem. Some switched this thing to evil." Said man flipping the switch and place it on Zoro.
"I'm Buggy the Clown and I love you Zoro." Said Buggy the Doll.
"Um… thanks…" said Zoro.
A few days later…
Zoro was just relaxing with snack food and sake when Buggy the Doll came with an other bottle of Sake.
"Did thou take Luffy for a walk?" asked Zoro.
"Yeah, but he buried me a few times." Said Buggy the Doll.
"Yeah he'll do that." Said Zoro making Zoro the doll mutter things.
That night, Buggy the Doll came home the doll house he shared with Brook's doll.
"Sorry I'm late, Zoro wanted a sponge bat." Said Buggy the Doll.
He went to the bed, "But coming home to you makes all worth while." Said Buggy the Doll.
He kissed his doll wife, cause her head to fall off.
"Oops sorry about that." He said putting it back on.
And they lived happily ever after.
I hope everyone enjoyed the story and once again Happy Halloween