"Good evening my fellow watchers since the Halloween season is around I feel that I Romania shall be your host for the world tales of horror. First comes out story about how England is struggling to cook anything decent, and it seems he would do anything to get better at cooking, including hunting for ingredients. But these ingredients aren't something you can just hunt legally. So comes our first story, "
"Cooks are British in Hell. "
It was a typical day like any other for England he had trouble with some of the tourist being turned off by his food. Unfortunately, he also brought his cooking to meetings, which nobody even wanted to go near. Even more unfortunate he was running out of money for good meat to use and had to resort to using very low-grade ingredients for his food.
"Bloody hell, why can't anybody appreciate my cooking? I try, and try but they never even want to taste. Worse I keep on finding tourists flocking to Paris for that frog's food. Desperate times call for desperate measures. It's time to get out the black magic again."
So with that he set up his magic room and began to chant a spell for an answer to his plea. Suddenly there came a message from his spell that said,
"Find and hunt for ingredients."
"Where the hell am I going to find the proper ingredients with so little time and money? Damn spell."
He erased his mage circle and went to bed hoping that there would be some turn around eventually.
The next day he made a bowl of sauce using the remaining meat and he had figuring that after the meeting he could use it for a bread dip. America saw him coming and warned everyone,
"Guy's Iggy's coming with some strange sauce."
Everyone gasped and tried to act normal as he came in the building with the sauce in hand and pushed it to the side for later. After the meeting he was prepared to get out the sauce and use it for himself. Unfortunately everyone thought that he made it for everyone to try out. However, Romano decided that the best way to avoid any more of England's cooking, was to get rid of it. As England was walking down with the sauce Romano thought to himself,
"This will be the last time that British bastard tries to poison us."
He then tripped England, causing him to let go of the bowl, and the sauce to land on Poland.
"Ah, this is like totally disgusting I just cleaned this outfit and I like got my hair trimmed yesterday."
England went over to help wipe off the sauce,
"I'm so sorry Poland I just tripped and,"
He soon tasted a sample of the sauce that came off of Poland. He tasted delicious; soon he realized what his magic message meant by hunting ingredients.
"So sorry about old chap, before you go home how about you come to my house to freshen up?"
"That's like totally what I wanted to do Iggy. Thanks."
As he got Poland in his house Poland was soon lead to the "bathroom." There he took off his clothes and wrapped a towel around himself looking for the shower.
"Like wow, this bathroom is really dark and big. I wonder where the shower is."
Soon Poland heard a door slam and he started freaking out.
"Okay I'm starting to get freaked out. Now it's really dark."
Soon a purple light surrounded Poland and he thought England turned the lights on. However, he couldn't move. Soon he began to feel as if someone was strangling him and ripping at his scalp, before he knew it he saw all of his hair on the ground, and then he felt as if his head was being torn off and his body being impaled. Soon he was lying on the ground with his head torn off and his body in a large puddle of his own blood.
"He, he, he, England you're a genius. Now time to make something good out of him."
All night he skinned and chopped up the body's meat thinking of what to make with his new meat source. The next day England had a large pot of beef stew prepared to bring to the next world meeting lunch. Italy soon caught the scent of the stew.
"Veh~ What's that great-a smell?"
"Ah Italy you must be smelling this stew I whipped up last night. I decided to use newer and fresher ingredients this time and it came out great."
America soon came in pushing Italy aside,
"There's no way that Iggy's food can be good. I'll taste it first to see if there's no poison put in."
America put spoonful of the stew in his mouth and surprisingly, it tasted good.
"Hey not bad."
Soon others started tasting and admitted that it was good, even France thought it was at least edible.
"Amazing Engrand- san, I never expected you to rearn how to cook this werr."
"Oh let's just say that I have a special new ingredient that I added."
While eating, Russia asked,
"Hey has anybody seen Poland today? He's usually at these meetings, da?"
Finland finished his bowl and said,
"I'm not too sure where he is but he's missing out on some great food."
Finland then ate another bowl of England's stew, and then another one, and then a fourth one.
"Finland old chap, you're eating so much you've got to be careful. It's making you fat, and soft." England had a hungry look in his eyes, "and juicy. I mean you must be very hungry if you're eating so much, why not come to my house for even more?"
Finland smiled and went to England's house hoping to get some more stew to eat. England gave him more to eat until he was full and before he had to leave he went to find the bathroom. However, a dark room caught his eye and he walked right in then he saw blood on the floor of the room leading up to a severed head, Finland recognized the face.
"Poland? Wait a minute there is a reason why you weren't at the meeting today."
Slam, went the door and soon Finland suffered Poland's same fate.
While there was no meeting a week form that point England did have plenty of Finnish meat pies to share with some tourists in London. Everyone was amazed at the taste of the pie, and soon he shared some of his other samples with other nations.
"Hey dudes, I haven't heard from Finland in over a week, where is he?"
"America-san don't you find it strange that Finrand went to Engrand's house rast week and didn't come back?"
"Oh, don't worry chaps he might just be a little warm and couldn't be out at all. Just keep enjoying the pie."
France then commented,
"I won't really enjoy zis since my own food is still better anyway."
England then thought,
"We'll just see about that frog when you are food one day."
As days passed by England kept on making better meals, while less nations were meeting up. Pretty soon America, France, Japan, China, Germany, Russia, and Italy were the only one's left. France was getting very suspicious of England's cooking knowing he would never know how to make meals that well with his style of cooking. Soon his thoughts were stopped when he saw a beautiful figure in the distance. And it wasn't just any beautiful figure; it was the figure of a very sexy woman.
"Ah, a belle femme out here all by herself wiz nobody else. Looks like I'll be 'aving dessert early tonight."
As he got closer the figure began to move away,
" 'ey ztop zat, where are you going mon lapin? Are we playing 'ard to get? Don't try and run from me, you're night of l'amour awaits you."
As soon as he got close enough to grab her he was in a building with a large dark room and began to try and make out with the "woman" he grabbed. When suddenly, he realized he was kissing a mist. He then bumped into the light switch of the building and there he saw corpses of other nations hung up as meat. He was horrified at the sight, even more horrified when he saw their decapitated heads. He ran out as soon as possible and went to tell the others. England knew he was in trouble, now that France found out about his secret ingredients. Worse he was so close to luring France into his trap.
"I knew I should have gone with something solid instead of mist. There's still no time to waste England. It's time they all die before anybody finds out."
France soon ran towards the other countries and told everybody what he saw,
"Wott ze hell? We've been eating our other nations over ze last few weeks."
"SHIT! Are you serious, Iggy's making us cannibals? DUDE!"
"Germany, I'm-a very scared right now. I don't want to be eaten."
"Aiyaah, and I thought that Korea eating dogs was insane, aru."
England then entered upon the remaining 7 nations,
"I'm afraid it is true lads, due to so many tourist going to Paris, expenses, and you insulting me constantly, I figure that in order to get the best ingredients is hunt for them yourself, not matter how you get them. But since you found out about my secret, I'm afraid you're all going to die."
With that England took out his spell book and started making different sharp objects fly everywhere towards the nations. Everyone ran away trying to avoid the objects but pretty soon they were all cornered with a pit of moving knives over the edge. Italy slipped, but Japan grabbed his arm, then others kept on grabbing when they were all slipping off the edge. Soon America was holding them all when they were linked as a chain almost falling off the edge.
"Blast, fall you gits."
America soon did what he had to do in order to save everyone from death. He took out his gun and fired at England's foot, causing him to fall into his own trap.
However, England woke up screaming,
"Damn, that's it no more late night meals before bed."