Hi there! I'm sorry for delaying so much, but I was out of inspiration and I didn't get many reviews, so that made me feel really bad without wanting to continue :C but well, tomorrow I'm leaving! I'm going to another town for 2 weeks for my vacations so ;) I'm sure I'll come back totally inspired and full of ideas! So stay tunned!
This is the last chapter of this story! I'm really thankful! Thank you for all of your kind reviews and the support I had through all this story that finally came to its end. THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR YOUR WORDS, LOVE AND EVERYTHING! YOU ROCK!
So now I hope you enjoy the last chapter ;)
Disclaimer: I do not own anything. Warning: it contains spoiler, so it's up to you if you wanna take the risk or not.
When Past Comes After You
Chapter 10: Trust
The thick silence filled the tense atmosphere between the two hunters. Bobby, who was driving, kept his sight and attention on the road ahead, trying not to get distracted by anything else. The latest events shook his conscience a little. He still couldn't get Sam's face out of his mind when he told him about the vision, something without an explanation so far. His mind tried to understand, to find a logical reason, a logical answer for this big question. Sam had obviously an increible power he couldn't utterly acknowledge yet, and it scared the crap out of him at the same time it made him feel proud.
On the other hand, Dean was sunk in his own thoughts. Sitting on the passenger seat, the oldest Winchester was looking out the window, watching the raindrops draw lines on the glass that protected him from them. He remembered the conversation he had with the Leviathan. He knew it was only a technique to break him apart, to annoy him before killing him, he knew monsters lie and exaggerate only to disturb, he knew he shouldn't listen to them when they speak, but sadly that was something his ears couldn't avoid. Without the intention, every single word the Leviathan said were etched on his conscience…
You're extremelly strong without your brother, you've always been. He was the one who was holding you back.
First lie, that was completely a lie. Things always went wrong when they were not together, and he specially didn't feel stronger if his brother wasn't there around with him, not because he wanted someone watching his back, but because he knew Sammy was there so he could play his older brother role and protect him from whatever they were up against.
Do you remember how things began to screw up when you joined him? His death, your trip to Hell, your deal with the Angels, the Apocalypse and now us...
Not really. If he was forced to say the crude truth, things were screwed up since the very beginning of their lives, so the fact he went after him was an improvement of his own, just like he said: he could do it alone but he didn't want to. It meant his brother's company was everything for him. And speaking more specifically, Sam wasn't the gulty of his own death and his trip to hell, nor the deal with the Angels nor the appearence of the Leviathans, so? Couldn't it be clearer?
Deep down you know things would be different without him.
Of course things would be different without him! His life would be an utter disaster, null and void, full of hate and despair with no sense, only with a strong desire to kill and despise whatever gets in the way... Summarizing, a monster with no humanity (something that his little brother was the only one to keep him away from). Just like he said:- "we keep each other human" and he really meant it.
Having this life is useless, you know you can never beat all the evilness in the world. Once you finish with a problem, another one will start immediately and that's gonna be a loop until you can't stand still any longer.
That's the sentence that bothered him the most, the one that dug deeper. He couldn't find a contradiction for these words. It has always been like that. Azazel was killed, immediately a bunch of demons (Lilith among them) were ready to attack. Once Lilith was killed, Lucifer was free. Once Lucifer was destroyed, Eve came. Once Eve was exterminated, Castiel started a plan that would end with the release of the Leviathans, and here they are, and he's almost sure that once they're done with the Leviathans, another threat will be about to raise. But who's going to be there to stop that? Who's gonna be there to beat them all down? They're the only one who can, and their lives are already screwed, so the least they can do is stop these monsters from screwing other people's lives.
And after making such a big reflection, now he had to start thinking what to say to his little brother when he arrives the hospital. He was eager to see him since Sam is always the one who calms him down after every fight, every bad day, every bad hunt, even though he didn't even know it. Sam's blue/green eyes had such a special and incomparable energy that gave Dean all his force back.
"How is he?" The green-eyed hunter decided to break the annoying silence, asking more about his little brother since the only thing he knew was that he woke up after having a vision.
"Uh, what?" Bobby was dragged out of his imagination after hearing Dean's voice, "Whatcha' say?"
"How's my brother? I mean, does something hurt him? Is he getting better or...? remember he was stabbed"
"I don't know, Dean, the boy was scared and he rushed me, I had no time to ask him how he was feeling" the old man justified himself.
The silence invaded the Winchester again.
"But if he woke up, it means he's getting better, right?"
"Yeah..." Dean's voice sounded unsure.
"So calm down. When we get there, we'll know" Bobby last said, hoping the Winchester would understand. He increased the speed to get there faster.
Some minutes later, Bobby and Dean arrived the hospital. They both stepped in as fast as their feet were allowed and walked fastly towards Sammy's room. The anxiousness was written on both faces, but mostly on Dean's. His mind was only focused on the words he'd have to release once he faces his brother and finally explain himself.
They stood still on the edge of the door watching the youngest Winchester sleep: eyes shut, steady pulse, tranquility all over him, still with dark bags under his eyes with a noticeable weakness and almost forgotten traces of shed tears. That image was etched on Dean's heart as he took a breath in. Then out…
"I'll go get a coffee, you go talk to him" the old hunter said as he put a heartwarming hand on the Winchester's shoulder before walking away and leaving him, ready to walk in.
Dean took another breath in and out, and started walking towards a chair that was near Sam's bed. He calmly sat down and looked at him… he hated when his little brother looked this weak, but also loved to see how peacefully he was sleeping. He didn't think of waking him up to put words he maybe didn't wanna hear into his head, he preferred to wait until he opens his eyes by his own, and he'd be there all the time Sam needed, because that's what he lived for, that's what he liked to do and no one would question him.
He also decided to whisper some cheerful words in case Sam needed those to find his way back to reality, because he always felt his little brother's guide.
"I'm back, Sammy" he started. "Bobby told me about your vision. But don't worry, he got there in time. I'm here now" his voice almost broke down as he imagined himself in the same situation Sam was, unable to escape, unable to run if he knew something was going to happen to him. He could almost feel the desperation his little brother did.
On the other hand, Sam was swimming in unconsciousness, a deep part of his mind that made him feel no pain, only warmth and confort. Sometimes he wished he could stay there, wherever he couldn't hear Lucifer's voice, wherever he was lonely, calm, away from all worries. But other times he wished he could open those eyes to meet his brother, the only person wandering his mind right now. He missed him, hell, he did. He missed talking normally to him, the jokes, the smell of the leather jacket… everything. Now he was covered in hesitation without knowing whether Bobby was able to save him from that scary future or not… Until a soft voice clarified his doubts.
"I'm back, Sammy"
What? Wait a minute… is it Dean?
"Bobby told me about your vision. But don't worry, he got there in time. I'm here now"
De… Dean! He's… he's safe. Bobby did it!
"I'm here now"
Those words echoed in his mind. He's there, right there with him as he's always been. How could he be sleeping? He has to wake up, he has to talk to him, he has to apologize for leaving, he has to say unspokenly that he needs him and loves him.
His voice was the guide he needed to find the light, to find the way back to consciousness. Dean's voice was always the one he needed to hear first.
"Sammy" whispered Dean in a low but soft voice. Then is when Sam''s eyes finally flew open.
"D'n…" he slurred and rubbed his eyes to clarify his sight.
"Hey, how you feelin'?"
Sam delayed a bit to answer. He still tried to get used to the light. "m f'ne" he slurred again.
"Uhm, Sam, I…"
"Dean… don't say anything. I'm the one who has to apologize. I shouldn't have left like that, I-"
"Sam" Dean shot a serious look. "I just want you to know that what I did… it wasn't because I didn't trust you. It was because, you know, she was a monster and sooner or later she was going to kill again… And I can't carry more guilt, you know? How would I feel if I knew that somebody else died because we didn't kill her?"
Sam only listened carefully and prepaired his own speech.
"Anyway, I'm sorry. I shouldn't have lied to you. I acted like a coward. I was afraid of what you could do or say, so I'm... really sorry…"
The blue/green-eyed hunter couldn't help to smile. His lips curled into a relieved grin once he realized that everything was okay with his brother and that he actually trusted him again.
"Thank you, Dean, thank you" he said with a grateful tone.
"For trusting me"
Dean's eyes filled with surprise. He could understand then, after looking deeply into his brother's eyes, how important it was for him to have his trust. Then, he knew he'd never lose the trust in him, no matter what happens. He knew that that feeling kept them together almost as strong as love did.
Both brothers smiled to each other and shot a look that said more than a million words, because that was his special and unspoken way to communicate.
And that, my friends, is the end. I think it's crappy, but well, I have no time, seriously. At least I hope you enjoyed it :D and thanks for reading my story, it means a lot to me! Thanks to the people who reviewed it and to the ones who read it :D *-* Soon I'll be uploading more ;) thanks for everything!
Bye, fellas, love u! Wish me luck in my vacations! :D