So if you have absolutely no understanding of Robin (Dick Grayson) before the Teen Titans, nor do you get "Holy _, Batman!" from the Adam West Batman movies, you may want to go and read something else. If you're like me and know all about that stuff (or even just get it a bit) then okay, go on reading. Of course you could read even if you don't know about that stuff, but it probably won't be funny for you since you probably won't get it. Probably.
This is a poor attempt at humor and contains many little references, only some of which I am explaining. Mentions of Young Justice, which also uses Dick Grayson with Tim Drake's hacker/detective skills. *sigh* (But his awesome ninja-ness) I also altered the comic timeline a bit, but then again, so did the writers of Teen Titans (And Young Justice).
And they're a bit out of character. (But if you think about it, it really is in character. If you let yourself be absorbed, maybe you can see it too? Maybe...)
Let's do this.
WHY YES I AM GOING THROUGH A BATMAN & ROBIN DC COMICS PHASE WHY DO YOU ASK?
It started with a little "You're criminal days are over, but we're just getting started," and continued with "What goes around —insert a roundhouse kick that sent the villain spinning— comes around," and led up to a "You know what they say; the bigger they are, the harder they fall," and they simply couldn't take it anymore.
The team always questioned his lame little puns as they fought. They hadn't called him out on him—yet—because he got the job done. More than that, Robin was team leader for a reason. He was very experienced and the best fighter, planner, and overall best of them all, even without powers (which, no matter how much Robin protested, the team knew) Of course, these puns weren't as bad as Beast Boy's, but it that's Beast Boy. He was nothing on the freaking Boy Wonder, Batman's side—uh, ex-sidekick (Well, it was more of a partnership, maybe an apprenticeship. Never a sidekick. But I digress.)(1) Basically, the corny puns didn't match the genius that is Robin.
"Guys this is weird…" Stated Beast Boy one lazy afternoon. "Robin's puns are kinda corny."
"At least they're better than yours, Beast Boy."
"Raven! That hurts!" The green boy said, clutching his chest dramatically, to which she just rolled her eyes.
"Beast Boy's got a point though, Rae. The other day, when we were fighting Cinderblock and he picked up a truck or something Robin yelled out 'Drop it Cinderblock, before we drop you!'" (Yeah. He actually said that in the show.) Cyborgs imitation of Robin was surprisingly right on and caused them all to giggle a bit. After a while, the calmed down.
"Perhaps we should ask him about it…" Starfire had said, unsure of what to make of it.
"I don't know, it sounds like it may not end well…" Cyborg actually agreed, but was pondering whether or not it was intruding.
Speaking of Robin, he had just popped from his room for reasons you should get already. The team ran to their respective ways of transport on impulse—they had been doing this for a while. Raven, Starfire, and Beast Boy flew, Robin on his R-cycle, and Cyborg took the T-car. They got to the scene, eyes narrowed and ready in their battle stances. Killer Moth was trying once again to invade the city with his moth armies.
"I guess you can't teach an old dog new tricks." Robin said smirking.
And there it was.
The team inwardly sighed at it; even Beast Boy had come to the point where he questioned the acrobat. The boy in question grabbed a few birdarangs from his utility belt.
The battle began. Robin had given the team a taste of what he had gone through since he was 9, and they all had the ability to understand what to do because of the various training simulations they received. (Not exactly Bat-training, but he didn't think the team could handle it. Besides, it takes years to understand each other through a glare.) Robin had created exactly what to do when this sort of invasion happened. They simultaneously attacked the army and Killer Moth.
Starfire sent starbolts from her eyes and threw them from her hands at moths, followed by Cyborg's barrage of punches and blasts. Raven used her powers to pick up a nearby lamppost to use like a baseball bat, swinging it around and knocking them towards Starfire and Cyborg. Beast Boy used sheer strength of his Gorilla form to swat them away, and Robin was doing hand-to-hand combat with Killer Moth.
Since the last time Robin had faced Killer Moth and had to go to Kitt—that girl's junior prom (The subject was still sore. Even more so on Starfire's side), he made sure that if that girl and Fang broke up again, then he wouldn't be there for her to use him to get Fang back. Robin had spent a few late nights making a new piece of equipment and found a perfect opportunity to test it out. Quickly, he reached into a pouch on his belt and flung the contents into the swarm. Gas filled the air as the team pulled out gas masks (part of the simulation). As it cleared, it revealed the ground littered with the mutant moths and Killer Moth underneath Robin's steel-bottomed boots.
"Hope you like orange, Killer Moth, because you're not wearing anything else for at least the next 20 years." The team had to bite back a groan.
As the police took Killer Moth away, Robin turns to his team with a small smirk/smile combination.
"Great job team. Now we don't have to worry about him buzzing around."
"Yeah, it was great…" Cyborg trailed off, scuffling his shoe in the dirt.
"It was… most glorious." Stated Starfire, an unsure tone altering the meaning of her statement.
A black eyebrow rose at the team and the smirk dropped into a slight, concentrating frown.
"Is, uh, is everything alright?" Robin's detective skills were on par with Batman's, but Tim was the detective of the Bat Family, this Robin was the fighter, the acrobat, and the one all the others had to live up to the legacy he left behind. (2) But even Tim wouldn't figure out that the cause of their distress was—.
"Your puns, dude. They're getting worse than Beast Boy's." Cyborg had decided to just mention what had been bothering them all. Beast Boy protested but a quick glare from Raven shut him up. Cyborg looked at Robin carefully, who was pondering the statement said by the half-robot. He turned to Starfire.
"…Are they really that bad?" She started to stare down at her boots, seemingly analyzing them for any scratches possibly gotten during the battle as if it were the most important thing of the moment. "Star?" She sighed and glanced at him.
"I am afraid that friend Cyborg is… correct." She finished, focusing back onto her boots.
"Beast Boy?" Suddenly, the boy was replaced with a green armadillo, rolled up in a ball. Robin finally turned to his "sister". (3) She pursed her lips, giving a look that was understood as "It's true, I'm sorry." (4) The Boy Wonder boarded his R-cycle and sped off.
The three that could didn't have the heart to fly home anymore and instead decided to go ride in Cyborg's T-car. Of course, the ride was extremely silent and tense, three of them squirming in their seats. Raven simply wore a guilty, crestfallen expression. Finally, Beast Boy broke the silence.
"You think Robin's alright?"
"I-I'm sure our friend is fine." Starfire stammered, still keeping a steady gaze at her boots.
Cyborg felt guiltiest of them all, and it was obvious he blamed himself for the whole ordeal, but kept it in his head, gripping the wheel harder.
"He's Robin, such a stupid thing wouldn't disturb him that much." Raven said finally. They all knew it was true, but they were still worried for their friend.
As they reached home, they found that their leader had locked himself in his room, and stayed there for 14 hours.
"Cy, do you wanna—" Beast Boy was worried but being the youngest, he was still immature and didn't know what to do in times such as these. Anything to break the thick atmosphere was great, which explained the video game controller held in the green boy's hand.
"But I didn't even—!"
"I said no." Cyborg's voice had climbed dramatically, causing Beast Boy to change into a puppy that looked like it'd been kicked.
"Look, BB, I'm sorry, but I'm worried, alright? He's been in there for almost a day and I think I—we should have never brought it up." Starfire, who since then had been playing floating back and forth having an internal debate, floated over to Cyborg and rested a hand on his shoulder.
"I too am worried for Robin. I fear he may never come out." One of Raven's eyes opened so that a violet iris looked at her teammates. Her legs were still crossed and her arms were still raised form the meditation she had been doing previous to her interrupting their conversation.
"He's fine. He just needed time to think, is all. I'm sure that's it." She closed the eye again and continued to levitate. If they weren't so worried, they would have noticed the supposed-to-be assuring statement was really Raven trying to reassure herself.
"But what if he never comes out—ROBIN!" Starfire was about to reiterate her earlier concerns but soon the vigilante himself showed and caused the whole room to go into a state of shock. Cyborg's jaw fell open, Starfire's mouth was in the form of an O, and even Raven was shocked, falling on the floor when she broke her concentration. Beast Boy was so shocked that he dropped his favorite gaming console and didn't laugh at Raven's fall. The latter was quite impressive on his part. He was too busy staring at the boy, as everyone else was.
"Hey guys." Robin said, a hand behind his head. Comically, the remaining team members had lined up, eyes wide and jaws open. After a long silence, Beast Boy spoke up.
"So… You're not mad?" Raven broke from her reverie to punch Beast Boy's arm, which caused him to glare at her and rub the now sore spot accusingly. Nonetheless, they were all waiting for his answer.
"Nah, I'm not mad." They all let out a breath.
"So… Why do you do those little phrases?" Starfire poked her index fingers together as she asked this, looking off to the side, then anxiously back at him. After a moment, he answered.
"It's just that I never got the chance to say anything before other than 'Holy something, Batman!'" The team looked at him strangely, searching for any signs that he was just pulling their legs. They found none and Robin walked away, leaving them confused.
Raven raised an eyebrow. "Something…"
Starfire was puzzled. "Batman?"
Robin hadn't laughed that hard since he'd been in the Young Justice League. (5)
Damn. I fail. Oh well.
So that was my sad attempt at humor. The idea entertained me and I dropped everything and wrote this in Geometry. Awesome. Well I suppose it could have been funny, but I ruined it. I always did fail at telling jokes…
I was too lazy to put detail! I think I'll rewrite it some other time… So lazyyyyyy…
I hope someone out there finds enjoyment. I'm just gonna go sulk in a corner now, excuse me.
(1) Young Justice reference #1 xD I know, I know. Young Justice? Well after Cartoon Network decided to randomly stop Teen Titans after a major story line and leaving us with just a cliffhanger on a starting story line, I had to watch something else since it seems it's never coming back. They left so many holes… What happened to Terra? Who was Slade? Where did that monster come from? When is Robin going to turn into Nightwing? Blah blah blah. So yeah. Besides, I was watching Justice League way before Teen Titans. When I was little, I really wanted to be Wonder Woman. Only fair that I watch its little successor, right? Right? /rant
(2)Let's pretend that Batman let him leave with the costume and mantle because of some scheme to make Gotham think that the original Robin was still there and Jason died and Tim's Robin while Robin's away and didn't have to be Nightwing, okay? I love the Bat Family 3 As you can tell. Robin fangirl/admirer! But I'm not the "I WANTZ THEIR BABEHZ" type, I just really admire them. I look up to them, I guess. :P (Dick's my favorite. Then Tim, Damien, Steph, then Jason. Nyahhhhh. Actually, the last two are just there for me. I don't really hate or like them. They're there. And Damien and Dick are pretty funny and awesome as the Dynamic Duo.)
(3)In Haunted, Raven went into Robin's mind to find Slade. I guess they have a mental/soul bond or something as a result. Just to let you know, I don't support them together; I like their brother/sister bond.
(4)If he can get Batman's emotionlessness, then he can definitely get the more expressive Raven. (In comparison, her emotions are much more obvious :P)
(5)Another Young Justice reference. Haha.
I'm sure there are a bunch more references I forgot to put in and try to explain...
Anyone want to edit/Suggestions?