Authorsnote:This is my first ever fan-fic. Feedback would be good for when and if I make another story. Hope you enjoy it!

Disclaimer:I don't own Advance Wars and if I did I wouldn't be ,making up stories about Advance Wars.

Orange Star

It was a beautiful day in Orange Star, the sun was shining, the birds were singing and there was not a cloud in the sky. Over at the Orange Star HQ though, it was a different story.

Sami was in her office signing paperwork and admiring her new HK21 she had bought from War-Mart. She and Andy were the only CO's at the HQ. All the other CO's were on holiday at a famous Orange Star resort. Sami and Andy had to stay behind due to an incident a week ago involving chocolate.

"Andy?" Sami asked approaching Andy from behind "What are you doing?"

Andy jumped as he heard Sami's voice, he didn't want to show her what he was doing, but he knew what would happen if he didn't. Andy reluctantly turned around, a half-eaten chocolate bar was in his hand and his mouth was covered in chocolate. "I-I'm eating ch-chocolate", he stammered.

"Where did you happen to get this chocolate from?" Sami curiously asked pointing at the chocolate.

"I uh… got it from a secret safe in your room, I'm pretty sure. I was originally looking for your money, because I didn't have enough to get a new wrench, but it only had chocolate in it and I was hungry soooo…" Andy looked up to see that Sami's curiosity had turned to pure anger, "Uh-oh."


"Sami look, I"- Andy was cut off, as he backed into a wall. A picture that was hanging on the wall fell off and hit Andy's head. "Owww!" he cried rubbing his head as glass pieces shattered on the floor.

While this was happening, a bazooka had seemingly appeared into Sami's hands. "For this, you shall die!" Sami growled as she started to load the bazooka, "Any last words?"

"Ummmmm…Oh! What's a continent?"

As he asked this Sami shot the bazooka, but Andy randomly tripped over nothing, causing the rocket to hit the wall instead of him resulting in a big hole where Andy had just been a few seconds ago. In the next room Kanbei was in his underwear with his katana, slashing through the draws and closets.

"Uh, Kanbei what are you doing here?" Sami asked totally forgetting about Andy.

"Kanbei is on quest for missing sock!"

"It's in your- oh never mind, it's not here though."

"Well if you say so. Next stop Blue Moon!" Kanbei yelled as he jumped out the window.

While this was happening Andy had slowly sneaked away.

"ANDY!" At the sound of his name Andy broke into a sprint. "Get back here you twerp!" Sami yelled running after him, loading another rocket into the bazooka.

5 mins later…

Everyone was standing was standing at the front of the HQ, which was a total wreck; there were holes in the walls, smoke plumes and rubble everywhere. Max was restraining Sami, while 2 soldiers had their guns pointed at her. Jake was holding the bazooka pretending to use it as an electric guitar. Andy, who was scared out of his wits, was hiding behind Rachel with his old wrench the ready.

Nell was pacing back and forth trying to control her anger, "Sami, how could you destroy our HQ?"

"He ate my chocolate." Sami replied, trying to get out of Max's strong grip.

"That doesn't mean you need to destroy our HQ!"


No buts!"

"Ok," Sami whimpered.

"For this you and Andy will, Uhhhhh…Hmmmmmmm. Sign paperwork for a month… yeah that's what you'll be doing." Nell turned around and walked towards one of the APCs. "Oh, and you won't be coming on holiday with us either."

"Well that's the worst punishment I've ever heard of," Sami told Rachel as they walked over the APC.

"Tell me about, once she made me do her washing for a week."

As the CO's sat in the APC, Andy who was staring out one of the windows asked' "Why is the sky blue?"

Max face palmed, Nell sighed, and Sami was grinding her teeth trying not to strangle him, while everyone else looked at Andy in disbelief. After about 15min of explaining and more questions, the APC was finally quiet.

(Back to the present)

"Ma'am!" a soldier had walked into Sami's office saluting her.

"What is it corporal?" Sami asked not looking up from her paperwork.

"We have a situation!"

"What's the situation?

"Andy's in the kitchen…cooking!"

"Well that's not a situa—What?" Sami was standing now.


The whole HQ shook violently. Sami held on to the table trying to keep her balance. The shaking suddenly stopped. "What the hell just happened?" Sami asked the soldier who was getting up off the floor.

"I think it came from the kitchen…"

Sami didn't hesitate; she grabbed her new gun put a magazine into it and started to sprint towards the kitchen. The HQ, which they had just got a week ago, was a mess glass and miscellaneous items littered the floor. All the soldiers were running around like headless chooks. The whole HQ was in chaos.

Sami reached the kitchen door; she had her gun at the ready. She slowly opened the door. What she saw literally made her jaw drop. There was nothing left of the kitchen, it was like there had been no kitchen at all. All that was left was a big black hole where the kitchen had originally been. Standing in the middle of the hole was Andy who was completely black. Sami couldn't say a word or even move she was that shocked.

"Hi ya Sami. Would you like some roast chicken?" Andy asked holding up a tray with a black lump sitting in the middle of it. "I made it myself!" Andy was grinning as though he wasn't aware of the damage he just caused.

"A-a-an," Sami fainted from shock.

"Oh well guess I'll just to eat it myself," Andy said to himself as he put a piece of chicken or what was now a lump of charcoal, in his mouth, "Mmmmmmm it's delicious, but I might of slightly overcooked it. Well that doesn't matter as long as it tastes nice."

And that is one of the many things that happen at orange star…

The End