The adventures of Drusilla, queen of the ocean

When Tick is offered to take his show girl routine on a cruise ship, no way is he sailing solo! Climb on board with the gang get set for a fabulous adventure with songs, sailors and all sorts of high jinxes on the high seas!

I own nothing, but enjoy :)

"Alice Springs hotel and spa, how may I help you?" Marion smiled down the mouth piece in her phone voice before it broke into a squeal.

"Tickie! Hey husband how's it going? Oh I'm good thanks," Then dropped her voice to a whisper in case the guests heard. "Tho' if I have one more American tourist tries to imitate the accent I might shove a digeree flamingdoo where the suns don't shine.
But no, I'm good. Tickieidiboo in fact! Oh that never gets old. Oh gosh loads of them. Yeah well Sydney boy thought you'd be used to them, there all as mad as one another."

"Anyway how's little fella doing? Ha ruddy ha, tell Auntie Adam he knew dam well who I was referring to. Is Benji any better? Really?
Blimey that went quick. He had chicken pox when he was five, he was ill for nearly a fortnight. Looked like blistered cookie. So is he almost good as new now then? Aw. Give him my love when he wakes up."

"You've done well husband dear. Not many blokes can take on a sick child with out a breakdown. What? Oh that doesn't surprise me. Tell Felicia not to be such a pussy. Nothing serious I hope. Yeah figured. If it's not Queen-flu it's a hang over. Corse there's a difference, anyone can get hung over only Adam get's Queen- no Felicia flu! Food wise, get something proper down your mate. Ha good! I hope she did. Tell her same back at her with high heels on."

"Yeah they're fine. Bob's keeping busy; he's been helping that garage bout a mile out, training up the apprentices. They're great when it comes to fancy sports cars like but I wouldn't trust them with a tow truck. I'm surprised he hasn't had a spanner dropped on his foot yet- Bernadette?"

Marion paused unsure how to phrase it.

"...Bernadette's fine. Well she seems happy enough. I know I know. Still behind the bar. She does pull a mean pint but cocktails could use a bit of work. She knows them, it's just fruity bits. Bit fiddly with the nails. Hey I did try! But Bernadette now insisting she'll only do two short shows a week. I mean short, sometimes not even half an hour. Nothing too lavish. A few songs, chat with crowd then another song or two then she's off. Doesn't even want backing dancers anymore. I think she's serious about retiring you know. I mean me, Bob and all the rest of the staff love her shows but the people who stay here aren't-, well they're not bothered." Marion sighed, silently cursing a pair of broods walking past her desk.

They'd drunkenly tried heckling her friend at last nights show, only to be cut down by Bernadette's razor wit so they'd simply walked out. Not that she was going to tell Mitzi that.

"'Corse I talked to her, what am I, a wall? And so has Bob, but it's her choice and if she wants to retire- huh? Alright I'll tell her... only if you tell me what 'not yet means'. Husband, your an awful liar. So what is it? The real reason you called? You cheeky bugger! A gig? Wow, well done you! And Adam too! Aw that's my boys! Oh you'll need Bernadette too? Sure I'll go get her; it's just what she needs one last show. When do you hit the road-?

"What? Oh. On tour? Well where then- wait, what about Benji? But we agreed! Both of us? With the girls? What about Bob? Right well that's nice of them but how? We can't all fit on that bus can we? No. I mean it's a great idea But that's almost a month of travelling. Not Priscilla ...So where is it then?"

"...OH. MY. GAAAAWD! Bernadette? Bernadette! Get Bob and start packing your bags! We're going on a CRUISE!"

Soooo? Yes, no? Anything that needs fixing? Thanks for reading :)