SM owns everything Twilight; I like to play with her toys…

xxx - Bubble Gum and Spider-Man - xxx

She's new to Forks and seriously lacks a brain filter. He's lived there his entire life and has never met anything like her. One night changes everything. Do opposites really attract, or are some things just never meant to be? Drabble. ExB. AH. AU. OOC. M for L&L.

PROLOGUE – EPOV

Bella is plastered and holding onto me for dear life.

Her breath smells like mint and hot chocolate.

I want to kiss her so bad, it hurts.

In her inebriated state, she'd probably let me.

She whispers, "Do it, I dare you."

I look down and search her face. Her eyes are bloodshot and her hair is a mess but she's still the most beautiful creature I've ever seen.

And I don't have a clue what to do with her.

1 - BPOV

I am bored out of my mind, standing at the counter at my lame ass job, chewing strawberry bubble gum and biting away at my already non-existing fingernails.

Typical Saturday afternoon at this boring-ass place.

I swear, you'd think a comic book store would be busy on a Saturday afternoon, but nooo, turns out the geeks only come out at night. Six thirty to be precise.

They're like fucking vampires, and not those lame-ass sparkly ones either. I'm talking about the "scarier than shit - quiet but sexy - Buffy's "Angel" - continuously brooding - eye candy" type.

When one of them looks at you, you feel perturbed because he's sooo fucking hot, he makes your hooch scream "cometomamabigboy".

Jesus. I'm so fucking screwed.

'Cause in all seriousness there is only one that makes my hooch speak to me.

This place is seriously lacking in the fuck buddy department.

Sometimes, I miss Phoenix.

Sometimes.

Don't get me wrong, the guys that come in here are all dorks. With the exception of the one Fuck-Hot,as I have nick-named him. I bet he doesn't even know how fucking hot he is either. I flirt with him all the time, well, I flirt with everybody all the fucking time.

Rose loves it. I think the fucker gets off on it. Fucking perve.

So yeah, Fuck-Hot Geek guy and his two buddies, which I have happily named the Blond and the Beast, come in here every Saturday night. On my fucking shift.

Someone shoot me.

If they ever bought anything, it'd be great, but all those three ever do is ogle the merchandise. Now if I was the merchandise, I might not mind so much.

Thanks to Scrimmy and WitchyVampireGirl for looking at this and telling me I had something good.

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