Title: Completed Puzzles
Word count: 3,658
Summary: My interpretation of what we won't see on-screen in 3x05 for our two favourite boys..
Warnings/Spoilers: 3x05 'The First Time'
Disclaimer: I am in no way associated with Glee, FOX, Ryan Murphy or anything else related to the Glee universe.
He'd been terribly shy at first, pressing his cheek against Blaine's and just holding him close. He could feel his heart beating rapidly in his chest and the twisting butterfly nerves in his stomach, and yet he knew, he knew, and he was so calm with the decision. The anxiety was bleeding away, the relief surrounding him as he pressed closer to Blaine.
"Blaine, I…I want you," he'd whispered.
Blaine had pulled back, eyes sparkling under the auditorium lights, bottom lip caught between his teeth. "Are you sure?"
Kurt slipped his fingers over Blaine's ear, cradling his face. And the longer he stared into the hazel eyes of his boyfriend, the longer he knew he was right. He was ready. He wanted this.
"Yes," he'd nodded finally.
Blaine's little half-inhale, that tiny shiver, hadn't been missed as he'd pressed his lips to Kurt's. It was sure and comfortable, definite and sincere.
"This weekend? My parents are out. Saturday? Come over," he'd whispered in a broken rush.
Kurt had pressed his nose into the curve of Blaine's neck, the tiniest of nods that seemed the loudest of affirmations.
It had been a difficult couple of days, to be honest. Brief touches turned into longer caresses. Innocent smiles turned into lustful smirks. Small kisses turned into passionate embraces. Kurt felt like he was humming with need and anticipation, and the air that vibrated around Blaine made him suspect that the two days were hardly any less torturous to Blaine.
But then Saturday arrived and even though he knew he was going to take off his clothes, he still spent an agonisingly long amount of time deliberating over an outfit. The white buttondown seemed too plain, but the brown vest seemed too overdone. The tie seemed too much and his pants needed to be pressed just so. He was sort of convinced he was never going to be comfortable in choosing clothes, maybe because he knew that clothes weren't important tonight. He was going to be there, free, bare, showing Blaine his flaws and insecurities and hoping he was still accepted for the boy beneath the outfits.
He'd said a breathless goodbye to his father, too anxious and fidgetty and scared that his father would realise something was up and stop him from going. The drive to Blaine's was too long, too filled with nervous energy and excitement.
And then he was there, hand raised to the door, biting his lip and reconsidering the entire thing. Maybe he wasn't ready? Maybe it was too soon? Maybe he should be thirty?
But no. No. He was sure. He loved Blaine and he knew Blaine loved him. He needed Blaine in a way he'd never needed anyone before he was ready. He was prepared. He brought his knuckles down twice, the faintest of knocks which still echoed in his heart. And then Blaine was pulling it open like he'd been waiting on the other side of the wood, and maybe he had, maybe he'd heard Kurt's car and rushed down the stairs and waited, because he didn't want to throw the door open and appear too eager.
"Hi," Blaine smiled, and yes, Kurt realised, he was ready to take this step with Blaine.
"Hi yourself," Kurt grinned back, and Blaine grabbed for his hand, tugging him inside and closing the door.
"So um…shoes off by the door," Blaine said, scratching at the back of his neck. Kurt nodded, wordlessly untying his shoes with his spare hand while keeping the other firmly locked with Blaine's fingers. "I don't…know how you want to do this," he admitted.
Kurt glanced up at Blaine and saw that he looked almost terrified with nerves. "Blaine.." He stood, left shoe half off as he brought his fingers to Blaine's cheek. "We don't have to do this."
"No! No, I want to," Blaine said quickly before gnawing at his bottom lip. "I just…do you want to eat or drink something? I feel like I'm inviting you over and you're a guest and all I want to do is dismiss all my host duties and push you into my bed."
Kurt's cheeks turned pink and he floundered for the words he wanted in the face of such…such honesty. "I…I think dismissing your host duties would be perfectly acceptable."
Blaine's smile was faintly dazzling and Kurt pulled off his other shoe, leaving them perfectly set by the shoerack.
"Lead the way," he whispered, even though he knew where Blaine's bedroom was.
And as he trailed after Blaine, he admired the simplicity of Blaine's outfit. Blaine was in his natural environment and he was comfortable with his own clothes, but the maroon pants and white tee did wonderful things for his ass and his arms. Kurt flushed at his thoughts as Blaine pushed the door to his room open and led Kurt inside.
It was, admittedly, incredibly awkward now. The intensity of the last few days had been thoroughly replaced by trepidation and anxiety. Blaine looked lost in his own bedroom, eyes on the carpet or maybe where his hand joined with Kurt's. And Kurt realised that Blaine really was frightened and that maybe for once, he needed to take charge.
He stepped around Blaine and sat primly on the edge of the bed, watching as Blaine looked back and forth between him and the wall.
"Kurt, I…" His forehead creased. "I love you. And…and I don't want this to just be thrown away. I want this to be special." He stepped towards Kurt, a hand over his chest. "I'm so scared that breathing is nearly impossible but not because I don't want this, and not because I'm afraid of getting hurt. I'm scared because I never believed that seeing you a year ago on that staircase…I never thought I'd be here and doing this."
Kurt shifted, offering his hands to Blaine who took them in each of his, and Kurt gently pulled him onto the bed beside him.
"You leave me breathless and speechless, Kurt. I've said it before, but you move me. You've changed my world and my entire life and I…I'm so ready for this," he said, eyes flickering to where their hands were linked. "I just…I don't…know where to start."
Kurt's lips quirked. "Well, I do believe you start first with a kiss," he explained, tilting his head to kiss the corner of Blaine's mouth. And Blaine inhaled the barest bit, hands sliding around Kurt's hips as he wriggled closer, pressing his lips to Kurt's again and again. Kisses of hope and love, courage and need, desire and want. And Kurt reciprocated, arms slipping around Blaine's neck to anchor them together, tongue darting out to graze Blaine's lower lip.
"Kurt," Blaine sighed and Kurt smiled, leaning back and pulling Blaine with him, over him, above him, on him. And it was slow, achingly slow, as Blaine fiddled with the buttons on Kurt's vest and slid it down his arms.
"Drop that on the floor carelessly and I'll scratch you," Kurt mumbled as he placed kitten-licks on Blaine's neck. A combination of a whimper and a snort escaped Blaine as he folded up the woolen garment and laid it on the floor with as much care as he could given that he was beginning the journey to uncovering Kurt's body.
The great thing about being home alone was the length of time they could spent, touching and kissing and licking. There was absolutely no rush anymore. The urgency that had tainted their kisses in the previous days was gone because, by some unspoken agreement, they both wanted to take their time mapping the other out. Blaine had growled while unknotting Kurt's tie but was abruptly distracted when Kurt stroked at his sides. Kurt was so heavily focused on his hands moving over Blaine's body that the whine that erupted from his throat when Blaine sucked lightly at his neck surprised him.
But the pace continued, steady and careful, revered and welcome. Blaine's fingers fumbled over the buttons on Kurt's shirt and Kurt could feel his breathing speed up, his anxiety overwhelming as Blaine got closer and closer to baring him whole.
"You're so beautiful," Blaine murmured, voice hushed. In an empty house where sound would never escape, they were being remarkably quiet. Kurt could feel the flush creeping up his neck. "Are you embarrassed?"
Kurt shrugged as his fingers curled in the fabric of Blaine's shirt.
His gaze was fixed as he tuned Blaine out as best as he could. Until Blaine's hands covered his, pulling them away and forcing Kurt to look at him.
"I can't…" Blaine frowned as he shifted above Kurt and touched his cheek. "I won't do this if you can't accept yourself. I can't do this if you aren't truly happy and comfortable and trust me."
Kurt could feel his stomach turning somersaults as he blinked, eyes meeting Blaine's. Yes, he wanted this. He wanted this so much. But… Well, the fact of the matter was he'd always been made to feel ashamed of his body. It was too feminine and too immaculate and too poised. And Blaine…Blaine with the curve in his biceps and the exposed veins of his forearms, Blaine with the strength in his neck and the jut of his jaw, Blaine with his warm hands that clasped Kurt's delicate white fingers. Blaine was every bit male and masculine. His cologne was musky and male, he got invited to the boy's nights that the Glee guys threw, his everything was very distinctly male…and Kurt was…Kurt was just…not.
Blaine watched the conflict in Kurt's eyes and he peeled the unbuttoned shirt open, barely, barely touching the skin of Kurt's stomach. It jarred Kurt from his musings as Blaine's tanned hands wandered over his pale skin.
"I know you've been bullied and I can understand feeling like you want to change your body to be someone else," Blaine said, pads of his fingers tracing the curves of Kurt's stomach and up to feel the ribs beneath his skin. "But I love you, I'm in love with you. I wouldn't want you to change a thing, from your eyes," his thumb traced over Kurt's eyebrow and down his nose to his lips, "to your lips, and your voice, and your body, and your arms, and hands." Blaine bent his head to kiss at Kurt's neck, and Kurt tilted it to allow him better access. "I love you. I love you. I never want you to change or be anything less than what you already are, because you're utterly flawless and perfect."
Kurt could feel the prickle behind his eyes as he blinked rapidly and Blaine's solid, strong, masculine hands wiped at the lone tear that escaped his eye.
"Let me love you," he whispered, fingers carding through Kurt's hair. And when his eyes met Kurt's blue-green, he could see the shine of unshed tears.
Kurt's fingers tangled with Blaine's as his stomach twisted with nerves again. His gaze was steady with Blaine, wordless communication passing. And as he continued to stare, the anxiousness in his belly abated and the desire that had been so absent in the face of nerves flared, white hot and tingling along his senses.
"Let me love you," Kurt whispered back.
Blaine smiled and Kurt sat up slightly so Blaine could ease his buttondown over his shoulders and arms, leaving Kurt's torso bare.
"I feel under-dressed," Kurt pouted.
"For the first time ever, I bet," Blaine teased.
Kurt blinked and then burst into giggles. "You're terrible." Blaine grinned at him cheekily, bending his head to allow Kurt to pull his tee over his head. Kurt was already reaching for the grey singlet when Blaine's hands caught his again.
"Kurt, I.." He was chewing his bottom lip again.
"Do you always talk this much?" Kurt mused, threading his fingers between Blaine's. Blaine managed a weak smile. "Blaine?"
"You…you remember what I told you about the Sadie Hawkins?" Blaine asked. It was needless really because of course Kurt remembered. "I just… I have some scars and…and I don't want you to be freaked out."
Kurt's forehead creased and he squeezed Blaine's hand. "You just soothed my insecurities and ignored your own. We can face this together. Please."
Blaine's breathing hitched as Kurt tugged at the singlet, shutting his eyes when it was off. He waited for the gasp, or being pushed away, or anything really. He didn't expect how fast Kurt turned him over, pressing him into his bed and pillows. His eyes were wide as he stared up into Kurt's.
"You tell me how flawless and perfect I am," Kurt muttered with a shake of his head as his fingers trailed over the scars that criss-crossed Blaine's torso. "And I know you weren't born with this. I can see in your eyes how much you hate it."
He passed over a thick mass of scarring on Blaine's stomach. He wanted to ask, he wanted to know, so much, so bad, the story behind the scars, the source of the injuries, the exact number of months Blaine spent in hospital recovering from all of this. But he knew it would break the mood too much. He knew that Blaine didn't want to discuss it right now. For all Kurt's fears of his body not being perfect enough for someone like Blaine, he'd never expected this to lie beneath the fabric of his boyfriend's clothes.
"But it doesn't make me love you any less," he admitted. "It doesn't change my opinion that you are amazing and wonderful and spectacular in my eyes. It doesn't change my opinion that I want you so much. Love me, Blaine, and let me love you."
Blaine nodded jerkily, tears spilling from the corners of his eyes as Kurt pressed against him, kissing him slowly and torturously, sliding his tongue back and forth. His hands were shaky as he cupped Kurt's cheek in one hand and pressed the other into Kurt's hip. And then Kurt brushed against his thigh and he felt how hard Kurt was and he whimpered into Kurt's mouth, his grip tightening.
The languid pace changed as Kurt dragged Blaine from his pants and then unbuttoned his own with hurried, nervous giggles. Kurt's nerves had transferred to Blaine as he looked down, mesmerised by the flush of Kurt's erection, until is slid against his stomach against his own and he groaned brokenly, fingers urgent as he reached for the condom and lube on his bedside table and placed them on the bed.
"Do you…?" They really should have discussed this, he thought. Kurt distracted him momentarily with a nibble beneath his ear. "Do you…do you want to top or bottom?" Kurt licked the shell of his ear and he shivered, fingers scraping over Kurt's hips. "Kurt."
Kurt shrugged, legs splayed on either side of Blaine's thighs as he mouthed at Blaine's neck. He honestly didn't care. He'd thought about it and he didn't mind. He'd go with whatever Blaine wanted at this stage.
"Kurt, s-stop," Blaine stuttered and Kurt pulled back just enough to look at Blaine.
"Blaine, I don't mind. Make a decision that you're happy with," he assured, hands wrapping around their erections. Blaine's back arched as he moaned and Kurt felt a thrill down his spine as the veins in Blaine's neck that stood out sharply.
"I..I want…" Blaine's nails bit into Kurt's thighs as he gasped for breath. "I want you. I want you inside me."
Kurt paused for the briefest moment before nodding, grabbing a pillow from behind Blaine's head to position it under his hips.
"You're sure you want to bottom?" he asked, even as he reached for the bottle of lube and opened the cap. Blaine watched, feeling his stomach clench into knots and relax again and nodded with a conviction he wished resonated deep down into his toes.
Kurt bent Blaine's knees, settling between them as he coated his fingers with the liquid. He circled his index finger around Blaine's entrance, feeling the puckered skin and listening to Blaine's whimpers.
"What are you wait-" Blaine's question was cut off as Kurt slowly eased his finger inside. It was vaguely uncomfortable but he tried to ignore it as Kurt kissed him over and over, distracting him from the tension and helping him relax until he realised he was barely noticing Kurt's finger as an intrusion and wriggled against it.
"More?" Kurt mumbled against his lips and Blaine nodded. Kurt dribbled some more lube over his fingers and again distracted Blaine with kisses and touches as he slid in another finger, following the internal check list of what he thought you were meant to do. The sudden jolt of Blaine's body when he curled his fingers and the breathy moan that slipped from Blaine's swollen, panting lips made him press at the spot again and Blaine's hand was suddenly gripping at Kurt's bicep.
"G-God, no, don't…too m-much…" he panted and Kurt backed off slightly, inching a third finger in as he bit lightly at Blaine's neck. When Kurt's three fingers stretched him wider, he groaned, fingers digging into Kurt's arm. "Kurt…K-Kurt please…"
"Shhh…" Kurt soothed, kissing his cheek as he rocked back and removed his fingers. Blaine whined, clawing at the condom and tearing it open for Kurt. "Bit desperate, huh?"
"Please…please…" he begged, and Kurt hushed him with another kiss as he unrolled the condom over his erection and slathered more lube over it. Kurt gently fisted Blaine's cock a few times before Blaine's back was arching off the bed. "Kurt, please…"
"Okay, okay," Kurt murmured, sliding between Blaine's legs and pressing the head of his dick against Blaine's opening. "This is gonna hurt…" Blaine's hands fumbled for Kurt's, fingers lacing as Kurt pressed them into the bed beside Blaine's head and pushed forward. He kissed at Blaine's face, trying to wipe away the winces as he apologised softly until his hips stopped and he realised he was in as far as he could be.
Blaine's hands were tightly gripping his as his face contorted and relaxed, breathing deeply and slowly.
"What…" Kurt blushed and hid his face against Blaine's neck. Blaine squeezed his hands, silent encouragement. "What does it feel like?"
Blaine snorted and then broke into chuckles.
"What on earth are you laughing at?" Kurt scowled, biting at Blaine's earlobe.
"It's just….it's just such a you thing to ask," he explained. He rolled his hips the slightest bit. "It…it feels…once the pain goes away, it's just…I feel so full and warm." His thumb brushed over Kurt's fingers as he tried to process the sensations rippling through his body. "It's so cliche to say I feel happy and safe, isn't it?"
Kurt shifted and bit down on the rush of pleasure. "Not at all," he smiled, kissing along Blaine's jaw.
"What…what about you?" Blaine whispered shyly.
"Me?" Kurt said, and then realised what Blaine was asking. "Oh. I…um. God." He ducked his head again. "I um…it's…it's like…it's like the best fist ever. It's so hot and God, Blaine…God…so tight."
Blaine shivered at the husky quality to Kurt's voice, a leg sliding over Kurt's hip to hold them together. "I…I think you can move now."
"Blaine, I…" Kurt slid his hips back, whimpering at the drag. "I love you."
"Love you t-too," Blaine hissed as Kurt thrust in again.
It started slow, much like the entire thing had been. It was gentle and cautious, until Kurt found that magic spot in Blaine's body that made him seize up and clutch at Kurt's hips.
"Kurt…Kurt…faster…please?" he trembled, and Kurt obliged, still afraid of hurting Blaine until Blaine slung his other leg around Kurt's body. "Kurt."
The desperation in Blaine's voice spurred Kurt into action, his thrusts quickly become erratic and shallow as Blaine's hand wrapped around his cock.
"Kurt…Kurt…" Blaine whined, sweat shining as Kurt tossed his head, their breathing speeding up and syncing and then falling out of sync.
"Blaine, I-I-" Kurt felt his world narrowing to a singular point low in his belly, a coiling, twisting snake that coiled dangerously.
And then the elastic band in his stomach snapped and he was sobbing with relief and pleasure, coming undone above Blaine and the look of absolute bliss on Kurt's face led to him giving a hard tug and he was breaking apart at the seams as his orgasm ripped through him, muscles spasming.
Blaine barely even noticed as Kurt slipped free, wobbling unsteadily towards Blaine's bathroom, disposing of the condom and grabbing a hand towel to clean Blaine off. He was still shuddering with after shocks as Kurt wiped the damp towel over his stomach and then placed it on the bedside table with the bottle of lube. Kurt curled up beside him, snuggling his face into the crook of Blaine's neck, a leg carelessly flung over Blaine's stomach.
Blaine reached for Kurt's hand, tangling their fingers together tightly and holding it over his still-thundering heart beat.
"I love you, so much," he whispered, tannged fingers slipping over pale porcelain.
Kurt smiled, tracing faintly over some of the scars on Blaine's chest. "And I love you."
Honestly, it was impossible to know how long they laid there, revelling and touching, caressing and tasting. Kurt wondered if he could die from loving too much, if maybe Brittany's reasoning for his father's heart attack actually had a grain of truth to it.
"You complete me," Blaine murmured as he tucked a lock of hair behind Kurt's ear. "You heal me. You fix me. You make me feel okay being who I am. You're my missing piece and I'm complete."
Kurt giggled as he twisted the curl behind Blaine's ear around his fingers. "Quoting Teenage Dream? Really?"
Blaine shrugged, turning to grin at Kurt, cupping his cheek. "That song changed my life, Mister Hummel."
Kurt kissed him, soft, gentle, and yet filled with so many promises. "Mine too, Mister Anderson."