Alright, so I know what you're here for. Plenty of horror and stuff. The three G's; Guts, Gore, and… um… Gobs of Guts. Yes. Prepare to enter a world where each of the Mane 6 is depicted in a most horroriffic (this may or may not be a word) light, while still staying TRUE to their characters. You know that feeling in your stomach? That isn't butterflies. That's pure TERROR that only an extremely handsome and skilled writer like me can entice. So, for this journey into a most certainly non-cupcakes story, I shall start with Applejack. But who will be the victim? Luckily, I have my classy victim spinner. Only the Mane 6 is listed, so that way you'll feel somewhat more sympathetic towards whoever is being killed for your amusement. Let's give her a spin… and… Rainbow Dash! Let's go!


The heat outside was extraordinary, with temperatures pushing a good 100 degrees. The air seemed to dance in front of Rainbow Dash's eyes as the heat caused everything to shimmer. Under the shade of a tree, Rainbow Dash was stranded as though on an island in the middle of an ocean, a cool refuge in what today felt like a vast dessert. She gave a quick glance at the sky, cloudless, and with a sun that gazed back at her with a ferocious glare. The heat seemed to cut right through the leaves of the tree she was resting under.

"You'd think Celestia was angry at the world or something. I'm burning up here!" Rainbow Dash grumbled. If she were to go flying today, she'd quickly roast under the heat of the sun. Even the cool breeze that normally blew through her rainbow mane as she flew wouldn't be enough to keep her cool. And a pegasus like Rainbow Dash who wasn't flying, wasn't happy. "How could today get any worse?" Rainbow Dash muttered, slumping back against her temporary tree home.

At least the tree was atop a small hill, which in turn gave a beautiful view of Equestria's spacious countryside. Rainbow Dash had an especially great view of Sweet Apple Acres. The few structures that made up the farm were easily dwarfed by the huge number of trees that coated the hills. Rainbow Dash couldn't help but wonder how Applejack was coping with the heat. After all, this time of year was when all the apple bucking was done. It wasn't healthy to be out on a day like this. Well… herself excluded.

But as Rainbow Dash continued to look at the farm she noticed a small figure in the distance. Was that…? Rainbow Dash puzzled over what pony would be crazy enough to try and endure this heat. She quickly concluded that sitting there and doing nothing would bring her no closer to solving that mystery. Rainbow Dash launched herself into the air, and a quick flight brought her to the figure's side.

"Hey Applejack!" Rainbow Dash called. She landed besides her friend, who was standing there, staring at an apple tree, a hard look on her face. Her eyes seemed slightly bloodshot, as though she lacked sleep. "Some day, huh? It's so hot! I mean, even hotter than yesterday, and that was really bad too!" Rainbow Dash grinned at Applejack. Was her friend going to stare at apples all day? "Applejack, you should really get inside. It's really hot out here. You wouldn't be helping anypony if you turn into a pony steak, you know?" Rainbow Dash laughed, but it quickly turned into an awkward one, since Applejack hadn't made a single noise. She was just staring at that tree. Rainbow Dash smiled nervously. She hadn't offended Applejack, had she? She tried again. "So, uh, Applejack…"

"They're dying, Rainbow Dash."

Rainbow Dash started at the silence being shattered with a cold, hard hammer that was Applejack's voice. "What was that? What's dying?"

A fierce gaze was now directed at Rainbow Dash. "The apples. All my hard work and care. They're wasting away before they're even leaving the tree."

Rainbow Dash slowly backed away from the intense gaze. Recently in Cloudsdale there'd been a problem with cloud production, resulting in a drought that'd been two weeks in length, and still ongoing. A devastating blow to earth ponies like Applejack. Rainbow Dash understood why Applejack was frustrated, but she didn't think AJ would become so… harsh.

"They're just apples. It's not like they're your family or anything." Rainbow Dash said with a nervous laugh accompanying it. And instantly she realized that was an extremely stupid thing to say. After all, practically everyone in Applejack's family had there name based off of some apple delicacy. "Oh, geez, that came out wrong…" Rainbow Dash began, but Applejack cut her off, with a stare unwavering and seeming to be made of steel.

"So you're one of those people." Applejack reached into the satchel she was carrying on her back, taking out a single apple. "Here."

"What am I supposed to do with this?"

"Consarnit! Just eat the damned thing!"

Rainbow Dash didn't want to anger her friend anymore and quickly swallowed the apple. But it didn't taste right. Her stomach… it was doing all the maneuvers that Rainbow Dash usually did in the sky. "What is…?" She whispered, before collapsing to the ground, losing consciousness.


Her stomach still ached as Rainbow Dash slowly opened her eyes. She could feel herself sitting in a wooden, straight-backed chair, and she seemed to be in some room in Applejack's house. But this room was dim, with all the windows and doors leading to the outside world closed. The slivers of light that slipped through the cracks were the only means of illumination, and they were enough. Enough to see the room was packed with apples. They filled crates, littered the floor, and covered the wooden table that was a short distance in front of Rainbow Dash. And out of the corner of her eye; was that some sort of red stuff smeared across the floor? The smear stretched from her chair to a door with no lighting coming from the cracks, so it must lead to the inner workings of the Apple family abode.

It's ketchup, that's all, Rainbow Dash reasoned. Nothing more. It's not like Applejack has blood covering her floor. But her mind quickly shifted from the mess to a particular apple in the room. Applejack.

"So you're awake." Applejack's voice had grown no less hard in the time that had passed.

Rainbow Dash groaned, her stomach continuing to ache. "What happened, Applejack?"

"Must've been a bad apple." Came the reply. Applejack set a plate on the table in front of Rainbow Dash. It had a pile of apples. "Eat em'."

"I don't know about this Applejack… My stomach's still killing me…"

"Eat the damn apples." Rainbow Dash was scared. She began to slowly pick up an apple and started to chew. "You know," Applejack began to speak, pacing as Rainbow Dash was finishing off the apple in her hooves. "Pinkie Pie was just like you. She walks up to me, saying how apples are nuthin but silly fruits. She didn't appreciate my hard work. She didn't appreciate my apples." At this she turned to Rainbow Dash, who was done with the apple. "Eat another." The frightened pony hastily grabbed another apple. And as she chewed, she could feel juice from the apple splattering against her face. Or was that tears from her eyes? Applejack continued to pace. "I brought her back here. I made her appreciate them. I made her. And let me tell you, when I was done with her, she was close to bursting. I reckon she did, actually. I reckon she nearly choked on em'…"

Rainbow Dash wanted to leave that hard wooden seat, to get up and run away, but fear kept her glued to that chair. What had AJ done to Pinkie Pie? Her hoof shook, as she took the final bite of her second apple.

"Eat another."

Rainbow Dash was definitely crying now. "Please AJ… I'm full. Really. I didn't mean to insult your apples! Just let me go! Please!"

"You want to leave? Only one way out for you…" AJ walked over to the door where the red trail ended, and she reached for the door.

Well, almost the door. Rainbow Dash was almost blinded when Applejack flipped the light switch that was on the wall right beside it..

AJ smiled, and asked, "Would you mind using the door over there?" She pointed to the door that light was streaming from. "Big Macintosh is sleeping, and you do NOT want to mess with his beauty sleep." A shocked look ran across Applejack's face when she saw the state Rainbow Dash was in. "What in tarnations? You're crying!"

Rainbow Dash sniffed. "You really scared me, Applejack! The way you were acting… You were so cold… And when I heard you talking about Pinkie Pie, and I saw the blood…"

"The what?" Applejack looked down at the floor and laughed. "Darlin, that ain't blood! Pinkie Pie was trying to put ketchup on some of my apples, and some of it got on the floor!" A soft look now appeared on Applejack's face. "Look, I'm sorry I worried you Rainbow Dash. The drought's just been mighty frustrating, and I've been a bit cold with everypony. When you ate that bad apple, I thought maybe a few more would perk you back up."

"And… and why was it all dark and creepy?"

"You want more light and heat during this drought? I wanted to keep the inside of the house cool!"

With the misunderstanding out of the way, the two friends shared a long, warm hug, and all was-


Author: STOP! Stop this right now! Cut the description, switch to script format, and just. Stop. Everything. You two. Come here!

Rainbow Dash: What's up?

Applejack: Did we do something wrong?

Author: Do something wrong? DO SOMETHING WRONG! Yes! What the hell was that ending? This is a horror fic, not some lovey-dovey, friendship fic! People came here to see blood, not freaking ketchup on the floor!

Applejack: Alright, mister genius writer. What were you expecting?

Author: You know, something crazy! I was expecting you to, I don't know, force feed her apples till she burst! You, know the pressure of the apples ripping open RD's skin, guts and stuff spilling onto the floor along with apple chunks. Something gory! The readers lap that crap right up!

Rainbow Dash: That's nasty! Who'd ever want to read that?

Author: You kidding me? If cupcakes can get tons of readers, this'll easily make me just as famous! Step 1: Offensive gore. Step 2: Viral attraction. Step 3: question mark. Step 4: Profit.

Rainbow Dash: Let me rephrase my question; Who'd ever enjoy reading that?

Author: You don't need to enjoy it, just find it offensive. Then forums will forever discuss my name! But now the story sucks. It was supposed to be simple. You poison Rainbow Dash, take her back to your barn-house-thing, and feed her to death! It's perfect!

Applejack: But why in tarnation would I do that?

Author: …Excuse me?

Applejack: You said at the very beginning you were gonna stay true to our characters. Why. Would I. Do that?

Author: Because… You know… You're frustrated about how hard you're working, and no one appreciates it. Or your apples. Yeah, the apples especially.

Applejack: For Pete's sake, they're just apples! You think I've never dealt with a drought before? I'm not gonna go crazy over it!

Author: Well, you're still being overworked…

Applejack: Nice try. We already addressed that problem in episode 4.

Author: Well, that's true, but-

Rainbow Dash: Hey author, I was reading over the story, and why is AJ just carrying a bag of "poisoned" apples?

Author: Oh, um… Maybe because-

Rainbow Dash: And if Applejack's so concerned about her apples, why are they just lying around in the room and not in storage where they can be protected?

Author: That's a good question. Not sure on the answer-

Twilight Sparkle: You mind if I cut in? I couldn't help but notice that you wanted Rainbow Dash to "literally" burst? Now, if Rainbow Dash was given enough apples to make her stomach split, then the internal bleeding would cause death long before she could eat enough apples to burst her skin open. And about the science behind the apples "dying" on the trees…

Author: STOP! All of you just shut up! I wanted to make a story! I give you ponies some free reign, and what do I get? Bitching! Bitching and suckiness! And you know what? I don't care. I've got 5 more ponies to make an awesome gore story out of! I don't need this one to be successful! Now go!

Applejack: Aren't we gettin paid?

Author: GO! End story!


Alright guys, sorry about that. I know you came in expecting a good gore story, but SOME ponies had to go and change the ending on me. No worries, the next fic is guaranteed to be good! Rarity is always obsessing with clothes, there's got to be a possibility for craziness somewhere in there… Bah. If any of you guys want to take a shot at an appropriate gore ending, be my guest! Maybe the ponies will listen to you more than they listen to me! *Grumble grumble*