DISCLAIMER...I own nothing of BN! If I did..oh boy!

A/N...It's an awkward construction, but I think that if Fiona left Michael and they met up later his thoughts would also be disjointed.


Seven years ago you left. I was on a CIA mission and you disappeared before I got back. No note, no goodbye, nothing.

Seven years ago I crawled into into a bottle of vodka, thinking there was no way out. Anson saw I was no use to him and left me alone. I heard he recently died.

Six years ago, not a single person wanted to be around me because I was either violent or nasty. Sam had enough of my drunken binges when I nearly killed myself driving to another bar because Carlito's wouldn't serve me when I arrived at their bar already drunk. Sam, Jesse and Nate knocked sense into me and they helped my mom get me cleaned up.

Six years ago, I left the CIA. Sam, Jesse and I own a small business where we help people in need. It was what I was meant to do.

Five years ago I met my wife, Melanie. Her father was a friend of Sam's. She's a wonderful woman who deserves better than me, but she has stayed by my side since we first met. I've put her through so much hell. Its taken me seven years to find you again and she's been supportive every step of the way. I wouldn't be here today if wasn't for her constant support.

Four years ago, Melanie and I were married. Sam met a coworker of Melanie's and they have been serious since the wedding. He's been living with her for the past two years.

Four years ago, Nate divorced Ruth and he has custody of Charlie. They live in the loft now. Ruth ran off with some guy she met at work and they live in Canada. She doesn't want anything to do with Charlie.

Three years ago Melanie and I had daughter. Her name is Callie and she's a bundle of energy. Uncle Jesse and Uncle Sammy are wrapped around her finger. There is nothing they wouldn't do for that little girl.

Two years ago Mom died. She had a massive stroke and held on for nearly three months. She just never got better. I never knew how much I would miss her until she was gone. We all miss her. Whenever I was alone with her she would ask if I found you. She adored Melanie, but she loved you like a daughter and missed you terribly.

That brings me to this year. I'm going to be a father again in a month. Its a boy this time. We are calling him Sam and let me tell you Sam is beaming with pride to have a kid named after him. Sam and his lady friend are expecting in six months. Jesse found someone online that he has been dating and Melanie swears they are getting married. I got a phone call two months ago from Sean. He said you came home and that he thought I should come see you. I didn't want to come but Sean assured my safety and everyone at home said I needed to come get closure with you. Melanie wanted to come, but she can't fly so close to her due date. I think you would like her.

So, this is me getting closure. I understand why you didn't stay but we could have beaten Anson together. I could have protected you. We all could have protected you. We were a family. Instead you left and you changed my life. As much as I love Melanie and my kids, I still think about the life you and I had and sometimes I still wish you were still with me in America. Its impossible now, so I've come to see you one last time before I let you go. You were the first woman I truly loved and you molded me into the man I am today. I missed and ached for you everyday for seven years and I will miss and ache for you until the day I die. You will always be in my heart. I have to go now, and I wont be back. I'm so sorry it ended like this.

Michael collapsed to the cold wet ground. He didn't remember Ireland being so cold. He cried for Fiona for the first time in seven years. He refused to cry over her until he found her. When he could cry no more, he made his way over to Fiona and kissed the cold, gray stone that had her name etched in it. "Sleep well Fiona, and say 'hello' to my mom for me."


A/N AGAIN: Sorry I ended it this way, but the muse kept bugging me to do it and she wouldn't leave me alone! Don't be mad! I love Fi! I reallly love her!