She gulped when she saw him. She knew it wasn't smart for her to be here, but she couldn't stay away. He probably wouldn't understand that. Hell, he might not even care. From what she heard, he had found someone and married her. She couldn't blame him. He couldn't wait around for her forever.
She sighed. She had tried to brace herself for this reunion, and had even debated coming. They were her friends as much as his! She wondered if he had brought his wife, and how different she was from herself. She shook her head, banishing the thoughts she shouldn't be thinking.
She had never been able to find someone like him, someone to replace him, in her heart. Nothing had compared to what she had felt for him, so all her relationships since him had been short lived and frankly, meaningless.
She truly did wish the best for him. If he was happy, that was great. Who was she to wish him unhappiness? She wondered if they had started a family, or even thought about it. She recalled nights when they had laid awake, talking about the days after GI Joe would be over, when their mission would finally be finished, and they could live a "normal" life.
She almost laughed aloud. When would her life ever be classified as normal? she thought bitterly. He certainly couldn't handle it. I'm sure he's found someone "normal" to love, she thought sarcastically. He certainly couldn't handle anyone who wasn't!
He hadn't noticed her yet. She wondered if she should cross the room, talk to him. She would have to act like she wasn't dying inside. Isn't that why she had won awards for acting? She could do it. Did she really want to, though? He was the one who had walked out on her, who had made the decision that the two of them weren't worth it. Maybe if she ignored him, it would be best for everyone. She hoped there wasn't the awkwardness that came with old friends when two former lovers were present in the same room.
She embraced Shana and smiled over the latest photos of her kids. She had kept in touch with most of her old friends, so catching up wasn't too long and involved. She mingled and worked her way through the room, steadily avoiding traveling in his direction. Let him think she didn't care!
He watched her, unable to take his eyes off of her. Walking away from her had been one of the biggest mistakes of his life, he knew, but what choice did he have? All they ever did at the end was argue about everything! They were just too different, and had come from two different worlds. Once GI Joe was over, what did they have in common? Nothing. Absolutely nothing. She was a former socialite who had rubbed elbows with royalty. Of course she would go back to that kind of life, he was sure, and it was a place he wasn't comfortable in.
He had sometimes found himself at the supermarket picking up one of the celebrity magazines and looking for her in it. He had heard she had acted in a few Broadway productions, as well as in London, to critical acclaim. It was even rumored she had won a Tony, but he wasn't sure. Either way, he was sure her life was much happier without him in it.
He was happy. He was. He had fallen in love with someone who was more like him, and they lived in a house in the suburbs. He was in urban development and enjoyed his job. Just because he didn't love his wife with the all consuming passion he had once felt for HER, well, that didn't matter. He was content. He DID love his wife, he told himself angrily. Everyone said what a great couple they were!
He chatted with his old buddies and caught up with what they had been doing. Some he had kept in touch with through email and phone calls. Others, he hadn't seen for awhile and it was nice to hear that they had been successful with what they had been doing.
He didn't want to go to her side of the room. He realized, even as he thought it, he had mentally divided the room between them. He shook his head, disgusted. He was happy. She obviously was, too. It had been a smart decision, a necessary decision. What was the harm in saying hello to her?