Disclaimer: I do not own Total Drama or any of its related seasons. They belong to Teletoon and Cartoon Network. The alphabet theme isn't mine and is property of Frank15. The 52 OC's in this story however are mine so do not steal them.

Pairings: SpiderxQuana, BarneyxLavender, JimmyxEleanor, AndyxMable, GaryxRaven, VinniexUzuri and OscarxXaria. The new parings … are secret!

The Warning: This chapter contains fire, bullying, drinking, bad smells, kebabs, butt squeezing and Easter Eggs. You have been warned.

Note: The sequel is here! Twenty six new characters that will hopefully shape up and be good successors to the first twenty six. I have high hopes for the story so hopefully you will all enjoy it at least a little bit. This story is going to have some very emotional times at certain episodes in the future so be wary. There are also links to the pictures of the characters on my profile if you want a better visual.

Be warned; the winner of TDL is mentioned in this chapter so that's a big spoiler.

And so the adventure begins!

Spider and Quana were standing on the Dock of Shame; both had big smiles on their faces as the sun radiantly shone down on Wawanakwa Island, which looked … different. Maybe it would be a nicer season now that Chris was defeated and fired.

"Isn't this exciting Quana; the first day of shooting our own show." Said Spider in excitement. "I have a feeling this'll be the best season yet!"

"Any season without Chris is a good one." Replied Quana with a giggle. "And the fact we're the new host and hostess might have something to do with it."

"True, true my lovely; though quite frankly I'm still amused Chris's middle name is Frothingslosh … seriously, who would name their kid that?" Asked Spider in puzzlement.

"Are you ready to start filming?" Asked an intern from behind the camera. "The contestants will be arriving pretty soon."

"Yep; let's get this show on the road!" Whooped Quana.

The intern turned the camera on and signaled that it was filming.

"Hello viewers at home and around the world. I'm Spider and this is my lovely girlfriend Quana. Welcome to season three of Total Drama! This season is going to be the biggest, funnest and hopefully least controversial season yet!" Smiled Spider.

"Last season twenty six campers, one for every letter of the alphabet, including myself and Spider, competed for a one million dollar prize. It was a long twenty eight days of brutal challenges, horrible maniacs, disgusting food and Chris Maclean … but in the end it was my little arachnid Spider that won the final challenge and became a million dollars richer!" Said Quana excitedly.

"Half a million actually; I split it with you remember?" Reminded Spider.

"But you still won … though now that I think about it I suppose that some people are going to be spoiled … but it's inevitable that it was going to be bought up at some point." Shrugged Quana. "Anyway; this season is, like last time, alphabet themed. Twenty six brand new contestants will be competing for another million dollars!"

"And notice how I'm not coughing and sneezing anymore?" Asked Spider to the camera. "Between seasons I got the treatment I need. As of now my white blood cell deficiency and diseases are no more! I am officially cured and sterile."

"For those who liked the other contestants like Barney, Raven, Lavender or even Eleanor, don't fret! Everyone from last season is gonna be along for the ride, even Chef Hatchet is still here … but not Chris; he's a dick." Pouted Quana.

"He got what he deserved." Agreed Spider while thinking back to Chris's humiliating and brutal downfall at the end of the previous season. "So yeah; all this and a lot more is in store for you guys, the loyal fan base. Stayed tuned for the first episode and challenge in the brand new season … Total Drama Letterama!"

(Theme song, I wanna be famous)

"There sure is a lot of diversity in the cast this year isn't there?" Asked Spider to Quana. "Some of the audition tapes were insane!"

"Yeah; I have reservations about a few of them." Agreed Quana. "But I'm sure all of them will have fans; it was like that in the first season and last season funnily enough."

"Nakia and Kasimar had fans?" Blinked Spider.

"…Good point." Mumbled Quana.

"Anyway; here comes the first of our new batch of contestants … it's Tyson!" Announced Spider.

A yacht pulled up with the sounds of an expertly played electric guitar coming from it. As it docked an average sized guy jumped off. He had green hair that was obviously died, an orange shirt with a few green swirls, blue pants with yellow stripes and olive green trainers. He also has a goatee and a pair of sunglasses that concealed his eyes.

"Hey dudes!" Greeted Tyson as he casually shook Spider and Quana's hands. "It's totally rad to be here. I bet my stay here is going to be completely gnarly!"

"We'd make it less harsh if we could." Said Spider.

"You misunderstood; I want it to be gnarly! I'm gonna rock the competition and rock out on my guitar!" Declared Tyson as he strummed a note on his guitar.

"Do you think you can go all the way?" Asked Quana.

"I'll just go with the flow dudette." Said Tyson simply.

"Get ready to meet the first of your competition; it's our resident Kitty Kat lover Winnie!" Smiled Quana.

Another yacht docked and out of it stepped a medium built girl with blond hair that went down her back as well as with two small purple streaks. She wore a dark blue t-shirt with pink polka dots, a green short skirt with a blue cutoff and a cat face, a belt with a fake cat tail on it, green sneakers which both had a red stripes and a headband with kitty ears on it.

"Meow, meow." Smiled Winnie cheerfully as she skipped over to Spider and Quana. "I'm ready to start the contest and sharpen my claws! I'll miss my cats but I'll get by."

"Say; you kind of look like Tabitha." Noted Quana.

"Sadly yes; a few people back home have noticed it too." Grumbled Winnie before turning cheerful again. "So; what's your name?"

"I'm Tyson dudette; sup?" Asked Tyson as he shook Winnie's hand.

"Hi! I'm Winnie; I love cats and all things kittyish." Grinned Winnie. "So; are you a sort of rock star?"

"My stage name is Tyson the Tornado." Nodded Tyson. "Cats are cool; I'm more of a lizard person though."

"Cool; but kitties are my all time number one!" Exclaimed Winnie.

"Let's hope the next person is a number one; it's Lankston." Said Spider as a third yacht arrived.

A short skinny reddish brunette stepped off the dock. He wore a dark blueish purple shirt with a single pink stripe, reddish pink pants and scarlet shoes. He had a goatee and a tiny bit of hair under his pointy nose. He has a seemingly permanent bored expression on his face and his eyes didn't seem to be fully open.

"So this is Wawanakwa; not up to par with what I deserve." Drawled Lankston dryly as he casually walked over to the others.

"Hey dude." Said Tyson as he extended his hand for a shake.

"No thanks; I have a bit of class and pride in my social standing." Replied Lankston boredly.

"Hi; I'm Winnie." Smiled Winnie.

"… Hmm; funny, you dress like a cat and you're named after a bear. Fascinating." Said Lankston in a dull sarcastic tone.

"… Boy; you're unpleasant." Frowned Winnie as she halted the conversation and turned away.

"Eh; I've been called worse." Shrugged Lankston with hardly any, if any at all, care.

"You gotta lighten up dude; you don't wanna be walking down the dock of shame too early do you?" Asked Tyson friendlily.

"That won't happen; I will be a vital asset to my future team. My intelligence is my selling point." Drawled Lankston.

"I feel like singing Disco Inferno because here comes Rheneas." Announced Quana as a fourth yacht docked and a slightly short guy stepped off.

Rheneas had spiky black hair with some of it died orange; a large orange fringe stood up in the center. His shirt was black with orange wrists and a fireball on the chest area while his pants were bright orange. His shoes were black and laced up. It was clear looking at his attire that he was a pyromaniac.

"…Let's buuuurn." Grinned Rheneas as he flicked his lighter on and off.

"Oh great; a pyro, what an unpleasant surprise and exactly what we DON'T need." Groaned Lankston.

"Well where do you get off insulting me ya beanpole?" Asked Rheneas casually. "You're the one wearing pink."

Lankston shut up and frowned.

"Hey dude." Greeted Tyson. "Ready to get gnarly?"

"As ready as I am to incinerate my way to the end of the game." Agreed Rheneas as he and Tyson shook hands.

"Hi; do you like cats?" Asked Winnie.

"I prefer fire; there is just something relaxing about the flames of an inferno." Said Rheneas softly. "I like superman too; he's awesome!"

"I think we'll remember the next contestant as awesome; it's Sasha." Said Spider as another yacht docked and let off a short girl.

Sasha had a purple jacket with an orange undershirt; her pants were tanish orange and her shoes were light blue. Her hair was black and went down her back but part of it was also in a ponytail. She had a purple hair band on her head and was playing on a DS.

"C'mon! Do a barrel roll! No, no! Darn it!" Grumbled Sasha as she lost a life. "Andross is hard."

"How's it going Sasha? Still playing video games I see." Smiled Spider.

"Yep; they're my hobby and reason to live." Said Sasha without looking away from her DS as she walked towards the others.

Because Sasha wasn't looking where she was going she was heading to the edge of the dock where she would fall into the water.

"Watch out!" Yelled Rheneas as he quickly grabbed Sasha and not a moment too late; another second she would have been in the water and her DS would have been ruined.

"Whoa, I gotta start paying more attention to my surroundings." Noted Sasha. "Thanks, err."

"Rheneas." Said Rheneas.

"And I'm Winnie." Smiled Winnie as she rapidly shook Sasha's hand.

"Oh great a gamer; of course, I am much better at games being that I'm me and she is her." Bragged Lankston condescendingly.

"Harshness dude." Frowned Tyson.

"As for you I could easily learn the guitar and play it with skill that far exceeds your own abysmal level." Drawled Lankston.

"Oh shut up." Said Sasha with a groan. "… There's always one I suppose."

"Pretty in pink with the heart of a lion; our next contestant is Jill." Said Quana as a sixth yacht docked and an average sized girl stepped off.

Jill had almost neck length black hair with a purple streak going across the bottom; she wore a bright pink shirt with a few dark pink lines going across it as well as a green skirt and pink leggings. Her shoes were a similar design to Winnie's except they were orange with a teal stripe. Jill had an expression that seemed to say 'go away'.

"Hmm; an island filled with dangerous wildlife and, so I've heard, bugs that carry rabies. And here I was expecting a mansion." Said Jill sarcastically. "I guess I'll make do; I don't need much anyway."

"Are you a 'my little pony' fan? You look like Pinkie Pie." Sneered Lankston.

"You're probably a fan seeing as you know one of the characters." Smirked Jill. "I just like pink; nothing wrong with that. Kinda hypocritical seeing as you're wearing pink too."

Lankston scowled as the other's laughed.

"You haven't heard the last of Lankston Gallows." Threatened Lankston.

"Pink's cool; every color is cool." Said Tyson as he began to lightly strum on his guitar.

"I like orangey red; it reminds me of fire!" Cackled Rheneas.

"I bet somebody is going to go insane in a week tops." Mused Jill.

"I somehow don't doubt that." Agreed Sasha.

"Whoa; how'd you know I get paranoid about my kitties when I'm away from them for too long?" Asked Winnie sounding impressed.

"Err … lucky guess." Shrugged Jill.

"Our next contestant might be lucky seeing as he is the seventh to arrive; it's Max!" Smiled Spider as the seventh yacht docked and let off a slightly lanky guy.

Max wore a woolen blue jumper with an orange collar and also orange wrists. His pants were orange with wires sticking out of his pockets and his shoes were bright scarlet red. He also wore a pair of 3D glasses that obscured his eyes. He didn't seem to have a neck though he did have a bit of gingery orange hair. He also had a small goatee.

"Salutations citizens; I'm Max." greeted Max in a slightly nasally nerdy voice. "I hope we can get along like a good D&D party and slay the red dragon."

"…What are you talking about?" Asked Jill in confusion.

"Dungeons and dragons." Replied Max. "I play a level thirty gnome fighter. I was the only one in the whole party to escape the red dragon alive."

"Dragons are cool; they breathe fire right?" Asked Rheneas.

"Yep; and red dragons are immune to it." Nodded Max. "Of course; my friends are even bigger fans than me, and they are realgeeks if you know what I mean!"

Max let out a nasally laugh while Jill blinked.

"Yeah; if I were you I'd keep your head down or somebody might wedgie you." Advised Jill.

"Wedgies are uncool." Agreed Tyson.

"Our eighth contestant is Gordon." Said Spider as the eighth yacht docked and a large guy stepped out.

Gordon was muscular and had a very beefy build. His shirt was black with a large white circle in the center and his pants were giraffe print in that they had the texture of a giraffe's fur. His shoes were red with black under soles. He had a can of booze in his hand and was drinking it before throwing the can into the lake.

"That was some good booze." Said Gordon as he approached the others. "…What the hell are you looking at?"

"…How's it going?" Asked Max.

"What? Do you want a fight then? Alright; let's fight!" Challenged Gordon slightly drunkenly.

"Are you drunk?" Asked Winnie uncertainly.

"I'm a little bit tipsy." Nodded Gordon before grabbing max and twisting his arm. "I told you I'd win the fight! I'm a real bruiser!"

"Ow!" wailed Max.

"Leave him alone!" Demanded Rheneas as he ran at Gordon and uppercut him off the dock and into the water.

"Nice uppercut … but did you need to hit him into the lake?" Asked Tyson.

"Yeah, I'm a dick." Smirked Rheneas.

"I'll rip your hide and eat your bones … urgh, hangover headache." Groaned Gordon as he pulled himself back onto the dock and took out another beer can which be began to drink from.

"Our next contestant hates baths; it's Nina." Introduced Quana as the ninth yacht docked and let out an average sixed girl.

Nina wore a dirt stained and slightly ripped blue shirt with a picture of a bar of soap with a cross over it. Her shorts were pink and also dirt stained. She wore brown sandals on her feet. Nina was a complete mess and covered in muck; she also smelt pretty bad and as such every current camper as well as Spider ands Quana covered their noses.

"Hi guys!" Waved Nina. "The island air sure smells nice … oh wait; that's me! Hahaha!"

Nina farted and laughed as she approached the others. Each of them took a step away while Lankston discreetly put a peg on his nose.

"Eew! You smell like a sewer!" Gagged Sasha. "You smell worse than the great mighty poo from Conker's Bad Fur day!"

"Have you by any chance heard of a bath? Or perhaps soap?" Asked Winnie while covering her nose and looking green.

"Yeah, funny story, I haven't bathed in months. Soap is yucky." Gagged Nina.

"You haven't bathed in … urgh! No wonder you smell as bad as an Orc." Gagged Max.

"I see no problem." Said Lankston with a peg over his nose.

"That's because you can smell her!" Snapped Jill.

"You'll get used to the smell." Said Nina cheerfully.

"Prepare to get used to our tenth contestant; it's Donny." Introduced Quana as the tenth yacht docked and dropped off a very short guy.

It was pretty clear that this guy suffered from Dwarfism judging by his short stature. He wore a black and orange striped shirt, blue jeans and dark green sneakers. He had short black hair and a casual look on his face.

"Hey guys." Greeted Donny.

Donny was met with a chorus of friendly hi's or hello's with one exception.

"Hey, short shit!" Laughed Gordon obnoxiously.

Donny's calm expression vanished and was replaced with a look of rage. Donny ran at Gordon and punched him in the gut, a second later he yanked Gordon down to his level by Gordon's shirt collar and smashed his own head against that of Gordon before upper cutting him off the dock. Donny took a few deep breaths while everyone else looked at him with wide eyes.

"…I think it might be in the interest of our lives that we never piss Donny off." Stated Rheneas.

"I'll say." Murmured Winnie in agreement.

"What are you staring at?" Asked Donny irritably. "Think it's alright to pick on a short guy or something?"

"No; it's just that … you beat the crap out of Gordon." Replied Sasha nervously.

"So that's who that jerk was?" Noted Donny as he watched Gordon slowly drag himself back onto the dock. "Well; he started it. I do not much like my height being poked fun at; it's why I took up boxing. I may not look it but I'm pretty good at fighting … so no snow white jokes … got it?"

Everyone nodded and Donny seemed to relax.

"Good … so; looks like you guys are my competition then? Nice to meet you." Said Donny in a complete change of mood.

"Our next contestant is Xyly." Stated Spider as the eleventh yacht docked and a muscular girl stepped off.

Xyly was quite muscular and strong; to match this she wore an authentic Viking helmet and had blond hair which completely covered her eyes. She wore a gold colored hoodie that had a lightning bolt over the chest area and a blue X on the midriff. Her pants were tealish blue and her shoes were half dark green and half lime green.

"Thanks for the ride Mr." Waved Xyly to the departing yacht before facing the others. "Hi everyone; I'm Xyly Magnus, descendent of the Magnus Viking clan."

"Why are Vikings always called Magnus?" Asked Winnie to Rheneas who shrugged as he didn't know the answer.

"You don't have any weapons with you … do you?" Asked Donny hesitantly.

"Sure do little buddy!" Nodded Xyly as she whipped out a battle axe from absolutely nowhere.

Donny looked enraged and Rheneas and Tyson quickly held him back.

"Don't call me little!" Bellowed Donny.

"Oh, er, sorry." Apologized Xyly as she dropped her battle axe to the ground which became embedded into the dock of shame. "I didn't think that sentence through."

Xyly yanked her battle axe out as though it wasn't stuck at all and joined the crowd.

"My, could it be? That battle axe looks to be over nine hundred years old! About nine hundred and fifteen I'd say." Said Max in fascination.

"Good guess 3D glasses guy; it's actually nine hundred and sixteen." Said Xyly in her deep voice.

"It's Max." Introduced Max. "But that is a magnificent piece of architecture … do you have any more?"

"Indeed I do." Nodded Xyly with a smile as she took out a second battle axe from nowhere once again.

"How is that possible?" Asked Lankston in confusion. "The battle axes couldn't possibly fit in her pocket!"

"I'm sorry short one but that's classified information." Said Xyly with an 'I'm not telling' sort of expression.

"Our next contestant is Opal." Prompted Quana as another yacht docked and a bouncy blue haired girl jumped off.

Opal was Chinese and her hair was died blue and green. Her shirt was orange and had a picture of lit dynamite on it. She wore a green mini skirt as well as blue shorts and fishnet stockings. Her shoes were purple. She also had a large excited grin on her face.

"Hi everyone! I'm Opal! It's short for Opal Mitsy Shigeru and long for O! Say; do any of you want to her a secret? Do ya do ya do ya do ya do ya do ya do ya? … I have a nose! Hahahahahahaha!" Laughed Opal insanely as she cart wheeled over to the other contestants. "Do you like trains?"

"… Ok; this one definitely escaped from a mental institution." Groaned Lankston. "I am a bit above a mental patient … in fact, I'm above all of you period."

"Aren't you a Grumpy Gus! Let; fix that with a healthy dose of pineapple!" Laughed Opal madly a she took out a pineapple and shoved it into Lankston's mouth.

While Lankston coughed and spluttered Opal glomped each of the others in turn.

"My god! Her insanity is over NINE THOUSAND!" Yelled Max.

"That didn't make much sense." Said Tyson. "Cool."

"Who cares about sense? It's as evil as Emperor Red the Crayon dark lord! Hahahahaha!" Laughed Opal like a maniac. "Do you like peaches? In Chinese a peach is called a 桃. In Catalan it is called a préssec!"

"… Craaaaazy." Said Donny with a small chuckle.

"Yeah; she must be a few beers short of a keg." Agreed Gordon as he sipped another can of beer.

"Say! You look just like Tabitha! Oh can you tell me your secret to success and how you are so rich despite being a meanie?" Asked Opal speedily to Winnie.

"How should I know; I'm not Tabitha." Said Winnie with a raised eyebrow but still with a smile.

"A is for Alice." Said Spider as another yacht docked and out of it stepped an average sized girl.

Alice had a serious and calculating expression as she looked over the other twelve campers. Her shirt was orange with a pink collar and a picture of a lemon on the midriff. Her pants were sky blue with orange flowers on them. She wore red high heels on her feet and had a red streak through the middle of her black hair.

"Greetings competition; I am Alice and I will defeat all of you." Said Alice swiftly as she walked over to the others with an air of superiority and the pride of a corporate lawyer.

"What makes you so sure?" Challenged Rheneas.

"It doesn't take a genius such as me to work out that I'm the prime candidate for victory." Said Alice simply.

"No; you are completely incorrect." Stated Lankston. "I'm the obvious winner; unlike you I have skills other than intelligence that I can rely on."

"Like what? Whining?" Scoffed Alice.

"That's for me to know and you to find out." Stated Lankston.

Before Alice could reply she was glomped by a blue and green haired blur.

"Hiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii! Do you like marshmallows? I like them as well but I like yellow balloons the most because they like honey just as much as a Blibbering Humdinger! Hahahahaha!" Laughed Opal insanely.

"Get off me; personal space is something I value." Said Alice calmly as she shoved Opal away.

"Ok! … Nice hair streak; did you get it at Wal-Mart?" Asked Opal with a crazy grin.

"…I'm surrounded by idiots." Muttered Alice.

"The next person might not be an idiot; it's Paul." Smiled Quana as the next yacht docked and let off a short guy.

Paul had orangey red hair with a curly quaff in the middle; he also had a pine scented freshener on a string around his neck. His shirt was aqua blue and his undershirt was red. His pants were indigo and had a bubble sort of pattern on them. Paul's shoes were black and shiny and for some reason he had a neckerchief covering his mouth. In one hand in held a can of air freshener.

"Hi everyone." Greeted Paul nervously. "This is my first time being on TV."

"I know the feeling." Agreed Spider as he offered his hand for a shake.

"Ah! Don't contaminate me." Shivered Paul as he took a step back.

"Oh, right, you're the germaphone." Remembered Spider. "Don't worry; between seasons I got the treatment I needed and I'm finally free of sickness."

"Really? … Well; that's good." Said Paul in relief. "I was rooting for you all the way despite how odd that sounds."

Paul approached the other contestants though stood a distance away.

"Oh dear; you look too clean. Let me muddy you up buddy!" Grinned Nina as she approached with her awful smell following.

"Stay back!" Cowered Paul as he started to spray the air freshener in front of him in hopes of warding Nina off. It seemed to work as she quickly took a step back.

"I'll get you muddy by sunset!" Promised Nina with a grin.

"Messy, messy, messy." Chanted Paul as he glanced at how filthy Nina was. "Am I the only one bothered by the smell?"

"I agree dude; she smells gnarly." Agreed Tyson with a slight gag. "Why are you wearing a neckerchief around your head? It's supposed to go around your neck dude."

"It's protection against germs." Explained Paul.

"Contestant number fifteen is Fripp." Said Spider as the fifteenth yacht arrived and a guy got off.

Fripp had blond hair with a few lone hairs longer then the rest. He wore a red shirt with a light red capital F on it. He wore blue pants though for some reason he wasn't wearing socks or shoes. He had an air of extreme dimness around him.

"Hello; my name's Fripp!" Waved Fripp.

"Hi Fripp." Greeted Sasha.

"Hello; my name's Fripp!" Said Fripp again.

"Hi." Said Xyly.

"Hi; my name's Fripp!" Said Fripp a third time.

"We know that." Muttered Donny.

"Hi; my name's Fripp!" Said Fripp.

"Tell us something else." Said Jill in annoyance.

There was a few seconds of silence where Fripp drooled dumbly.

"Hello, my name's Fripp!" Laughed Fripp as she walked over to the others and stopped in front of Alice.

"Why do you have a pineapple on your shirt?" Asked Fripp.

"It's a lemon you idiot." Muttered Alice.

"Why?" Asked Fripp.

"Because it is." Sighed Alice.

"Why?" Repeated Fripp.

"Because it's a lemon." Growled Alice.

"… Why?" Asked Fripp.

"Just … go bother somebody else you twit!" Snapped Alice.

"Ok. By the way; I'm Fripp!" Smiled Fripp dumbly.

Alice groaned in frustration as another yacht arrived.

"Our next contestant should be familiar; it's Eddie!" Introduced Quana as Eddie stepped off the yacht.

Eddie had black hair in a sort of detective version of Elvis Presley's hair do. He wore a detective's jacket over an orange undershirt and green trousers with brown loafers for shoes. He wore a detective fedora and his belt had several things attached to it such as a pencil and notebook, magnifying glass and finger print brush.

"Hi everyone." Waved Eddie as he approached the other fifteen contestants. "Boy; it feels great to play the game for real instead of just doing the aftermaths which were fun in their own way. The mystery of who will win is one I'm glad that I don't know the answer to yet."

"Alright Eddie?" Greeted Sasha as she and Eddie shook hands.

"Am I the only one who thinks they'll have an unfair advantage?" Asked Alice. "They're already known by the audience. We should play on a level playing field … with me on top."

"Don't worry about it; most reality shows use contestants that have advantages like in Survivor Redemption Island." Shrugged Rheneas.

"And I guess I should take a pyro's word for it." Said Alice sarcastically.

"Hello; my name's Fripp." Said Fripp again.

"I sincerely doubt I'll have any real advantage." Assured Eddie. "I know none of the challenges and I hardly know any of you besides Sasha. Trust me; I'm not going to cheat."

"Who's Sasha?" Asked Fripp dumbly before turning to Paul. "Are you Sasha?"

"Err … no." Said Paul in confusion.

"Our next contestant is Helen." Declared Spider as another yacht docked and a girl in a suit got out.

Helen had an expression of dullness and boredom. She wore a light green business suit and a boring brown tie. She had a pair of pinstriped trousers and pale blue business shoes. Her hair was black, tidy and dull. Helen had a look of boring around her.

"Hi." Said Helen in a voice that was a mixture of gravel digging and nasallyness.

"Hi Helen!" Waved Opal as she bounced over grinning like a grinning thing.

"Get. Away. From. Me." Snapped Helen irritably.

"Somebody woke up on the wrong side of the bed." Said Jill with an eye roll.

"Eye rolling is far to exciting for a successful life." Said Helen dully. "Ideally the world would have no fun and all work because boring is beautiful."

"So you don't like amusement parks or video games?" Asked Sasha blinking.

"As I said; boring is beautiful. I hope to one day own a company that makes paperclips, stales and beige crayons." Droned Helen.

"What use is a beige crayon? It would barley stand out on paper and few people like the color anyway." Stated Max.

"Yeah; fiery red crayons are better." Agreed Rheneas.

"You lot are brain dead fun loving delinquents," Said Helen in distaste as she stood at the edge of the growing crowd and folded her arms.

"Our eighteenth contestant is Imanda." Smiled Quana as another yacht docked and let off a black girl.

Imanda was clearly a Girl Scout; she was dressed in a brown and green Girl Scout outfit complete with badge sash. Her skirt was also brown and green as were her shoes while her long socks were green with brownish pink polka dots. She wore pink glasses and had brownish hair and some freckles.

"Greetings fellow campers!" Smiled Imanda cheerfully. "It's just us and the great outdoors for the next few weeks; I'm gonna be earning by 'I won a reality show' badge if I'm lucky. Say; anyone want a cookie?"

"Haha! Girl scouts should be renamed the Cookie girls; that's all they do after all!" Laughed Gordon obnoxiously before hiccupping drunkly. "I'd like a cookie."

"My mum told me to never talk to assholes; sorry." Frowned Imanda as she handed the cookies out to everyone else.

"Mmm, not bad. I love cookies." Thanked Eddie.

"Bah! It tastes like crud. Then again; that's what I should expect from somebody who isn't me." Bragged Lankston.

"Arrogant people grind my gears." Said Tyson calmly. "They're just … uncool."

"Sombrero's!" Yelled Fripp for no apparent reason. "I wonder what a sombrero cookie would taste like."

"I can assure you that it would be icky." Said Imanda. "And I should know as I've got my 'baking disaster' badge."

"Are there any badges the girl scouts don't have?" Asked Nina.

"There isn't a rolling in mud badge." Chuckled Imanda.

"Our next contestant has the same letter as me; its Quarla." Smiled Quana as a tough looking girl got off the newly docked yacht.

Quarla had black hair in a tough hair style complete with triple pig tails and an orange hair band. Her shirt was yellow though she had a white jacket with a black stitching pattern on the sleeves. Her skirt was blood red and her shoes were yellow. Quarla had a piercing above her left eye and she had a slightly mean looking expression.

Quarla strolled down the dock sizing up her competition and glanced at Paul.

"No doubt about it; you won't last a single day … I'll make sure of that." Sneered Quarla as she made a throat slitting motion with her finger before glancing at Donny and Lankston. "Same with you two deadweights."

"Oh; that's a good first impression." Said Sasha with an eye roll.

"Shut up!" Snapped Quarla as she shoved Sasha over. "I do not much appreciate backchat."

"Hey! Leave my friend alone!" Said Eddie in anger as he approached Quarla. "Are you a griever of some kind? That's just bullying."

"What's so bad about that?" Smirked Quarla as she pushed Paul to the ground. "I encourage bullying!"

"Kasimar 2.0." Sighed Winnie.

"Our twentieth contestant of the competition is Yannis." Said Spider as the twentieth yacht docked and off it stepped a short black guy.

Yannis had tidy brownish black hair in a bowler cut. He wore a light blue shirt, dark brown pants and pinkish scarlet shoes. He also wore a pinky red bow tie.

Yannis gave a polite nod to Spider and Quana as he walked over to the other contestants with a smile on his face.

"What's up; I'm Rheneas." Said Rheneas as he shook Yannis's hand.

Yannis gave a thumbs up but still didn't say anything.

"How does it feel to be on reality TV?" Asked Winnie cheerfully.

Yannis gave a double thumbs up and nodded his head to show that it felt awesome.

"Why isn't he saying anything?" Asked Xyly.

"I deduce he is either shy, is unable to speak or simply doesn't want to speak." Stated Eddie.

"I'll make him speak … or at least scream." Smirked Quarla as she approached Yannis and prepared to twist his arm. Rheneas and Tyson quickly took action.

"Nuh uh, I don't think so." Said Rheneas coolly.

"Attacking somebody for being shy … that is just plain uncool." Said Tyson in his laid back voice.

"Actually guys." Said Spider. "Yannis can't talk, that's why he isn't saying anything to you."

Yannis nodded to show Spider was correct and scowled at Quarla before walking away and standing next to Winnie. He pointed to the cat tail belt as if to ask why she was wearing it.

"Oh, this? It's just to show how much I love cats. They're my favorite thing in the world you know." Smiled Winnie.

Yannis just smiled politely as the twenty first yacht docked.

"The next person to arrive is … Zed." Smiled Quana as a pale average sized teen got off the yacht.

It was obvious just by looking at Zed that he was from the country. He had long shaggy black hair and a straw farmer hat. His shirt was a plain grey while on his legs he wore blue trousers that had a few patches sewn on here and there. He also wore farming boots and a horseshoe on a string around his necklace.

"Hi guys." Waved Zed. "I'm Zed, I'm from the prairies."

"Oh great; another uneducated prairie boy." Grumbled Lankston. "The world needs educated people like me."

"In other words not like him." Said Donny while Lankston fumed.

"You seem far away from home; are you lost?" Taunted Quarla.

"Nope; I'm at Camp Wawanakwa on Total Drama Letterama just like the rest of you." Smiled Zed while completely missing the sarcasm before noticing Sasha's DS. "What's that watcha-ma-callit? Is it a handheld oven?"

"Not even close." Laughed Sasha. "It's a Nintendo DS; you can play games on it."

"Games? Like tag or sheep shearing?" Guessed Zed.

"No; things like Mario." Replied Sasha.

"Oh, that makes sense … who's Mario?" Asked Zed curiously


"He's a decorator who dressed in pink." Said Fripp dumbly.

"Actually he's a plumber in red." Corrected Sasha with an amused sigh.

"…Hello; my name's Fripp." Said Fripp.

While Sasha sighed Zed shook Fripp's hand.

"Nice to meet you Fripp." Said Zed politely.

"Please welcome are fastest contestant … Cherry." Announced Quana as another yacht docked and a girl stepped off.

Cherry wore a racers helmet over her head which obscured her face. She wore a one piece purple and green racing suit while her shoes were a nice shade of pastel blue. Her helmet was blue and orange

"Brrrrrrmm! Let's kick in into top gear and go as fast as a race car! Brum!" Cheered Cherry while sounding very excited and slightly hyper.

Cherry sped over to the others and shook hands with a few of them.

"What's your favorite car?" Asked Cherry to Zed.

"Probably my pop's truck." Answered Zed.

"That's too slow for me! I much prefer Ferrari's and Zonda's! I have a need for speed!" Grinned Cherry.

"Could you take off your helmet so we can see what you look like?" Asked Imanda as she shook hands with Cherry.

"Ok." Smiled Cherry as she took off her helmet revealing herself to have messy and curly brunette hair and aqua blue eyes.

"I like rally racing; so much dirt and filth." Said Nina before farting again.

"Yuck! Messy germs." Mumbled Paul as he quickly sprayed some air freshener.

"Germs aren't scary." Assured Cherry. "Nothing to fear but fear itself!"

"And germs are the embodiment of fear." Replied Paul.

"Our next contestant likes money as much as Mr. Krabs. It's Bishop." Said Spider as another yacht pulled up and a guy got off.

Bishop had an expression of snobbery and upper class attitude. He had crimson red hair and a small goatee with a condescending look on his face as well as a prominent nose. He wore a fancy 'pinstriped' suit colored gold, dark green and black in stripes and his pants were of a similar pattern except they were dark green, teal and black. His shoes looked very expensive and were blue with red laces and gold under soles.

"What exactly are these peasants doing here before me? I should have been first as I'm the richest!" Snapped Bishop.

"I'm not a peasant; I'm a farmer." Said Zed.

"I refuse to associate with a hick." Said Bishop sharply as he strutted to the crowd. "Then again; I'm rich and none of you are so it's to be expected."

"If you are already rich then why are you here?" Asked Eddie. "It makes little sense."

"Fame and glory as well as the money; you can never have too much money." Said Bishop smugly. "It takes more than wealth to be truly upper class though; it takes breeding, manipulation and snobbery."

"You look like a Star Wars fan!" Giggled Opal crazily. "You dress funny for a rich person."

Bishop growled.

"For your information Little Miss blue hair and little brain; it is a refined cultured outfit that a poor person such as yourself couldn't possibly comprehend. In short; I'm rich and you are not."

"… You're nose is like a pickle." Laughed Opal as she began to act like a monkey for no real reason.

Bishop growled as the next yacht arrived.

"Our next female contestant is Kim." Announced Quana as a blond girl stepped off the yacht.

The most noticeable thing about Kim was her … large boobs. She had blond hair in a pony tail. Her shirt was a small black tank top with a red heart on the chest area. She also wore a pair of black shorts with a heart on them and red trim. Her high heels were red and she wore eye liner and mascara around her eyes.

"Hey guys." Said Kim in a intentionally sexy voice. "I hope we can … be friends during our stay on this island."

"I sure hope so." Drooled Gordon as he drank another can of bear. "You got a great rack."

"Tactless peasant." Muttered Bishop. "Greetings Kim m'lady; you sure are a pretty girl."

"Thank you." Said Kim in pretend shyness.

When Bishop turned away she gave a sly wink to Donny who grinned bashfully.

"Wanna make out?" Asked Gordon as he slung an arm around Kim and made a kissy face.


Kim slapped Gordon and pretended to look offended.

"That's hot." Grinned Gordon like an idiot as he walked away.

"Hormonal idiots." Said Quarla in irritation.

"Love is far too fun and exciting." Agreed Helen.

"Our final male contestant and twenty-fifth contestant overall is Ulric." Said Spider as yet another yacht docked; out of this one stepped an average sized guy who looked fairly well built.

Ulric wore a green hoodie and red pants. His shoes were dark blackish brown and seemed to be slightly worn. His hair was black, short and curly; his eyebrows were similarly colored and textured as well.

"Greetings everyone." Said Ulric in a polite yet gruff tone. "I trust that you are all excited to compete for a million dollars."

"Not as much as doing this!" Smirked Gordon as he threw an empty bear can at Ulric; the tough guy caught it before it made contact and looked annoyed.

"Bravo; that was really mature." Said Ulric sarcastically as he tossed the empty beer can back at Gordon but with much more force than the drunk teen had used.

Gordon was knocked off the dock.

Ulric dusted his hands for a moment before joining the others.

"I think me and you are gonna get along just fine." Said Donny with a satisfied smirk as he shook Ulric's hand.

"Here's hoping." Nodded Ulric.

"And now; the final contestant in the competition is … VayVay!" Announced Quana … but no yacht docked; there was nothing coming to the island. "That's odd; VayVay should be here."

"Well she had further to travel than the others; maybe we should give Andy and Mable a call since they were collecting her." Suggested Spider.

"Good idea my little arachnid." Agreed Quana as she took out her orange cell phone and dialed a number; a few seconds later it wrung. "Hello. Hi Andy; it's Quana. Where are you? The competition is starting and VayVay should be here. …Yes; I can handle bad news … what and what and WHAT? "Gasped Quana in shock. "Uh huh; ok …. Ok then, see you in a few days."

Quana pocketed her phone and looked like she didn't know what to say.

"What happened?" Asked Spider.

"Err … VayVay won't be here for a couple of days … basically." Quana began to whisper into spider's ear and he looked stunned.

"That is pretty unfortunate … well; we can't stall the show since everyone else is now here. Well; we'll just have to start without VayVay I suppose." Shrugged Spider. "Ok then everyone, let's head into camp and we can start the game."

"What happened to VayVay?" Asked Paul.

"A lot of crazy stuff." Said Quana simply.

Confessional: First of the season!

Spider: This is the confessional, noticeably renovated and less dirty than last season. Here the campers can tell you at home what they are thinking and also say stuff they wouldn't want to say around the others. But if you've watched the previous two seasons you'd probably know that already.

Donny: I think I might have fun in this contest … provided nobody calls me short. You got that? No short jokes! (Donny gives the camera the 'evil eye').

Winnie: Meow! This is so exciting! I'm gonna win this show and buy my kitties a lifetime's supply of tuna!

Fripp: Potato's!

Quarla: It sure is gonna be fun hassling that wimpy germaphobe! (Quarla laughs).

Tyson: Being on TV is cool and all; but strumming a tune on Sharon my guitar is even cooler.

Lankston: Might as well hand me the cheque already; I'm the obvious winner.

Spider and Quana led the twenty five contestants to camp center; all of the contestants immediately noticed that the three cabins from the previous season were gone and had been replaced with three new buildings.

"Well everyone; welcome to Total Drama Letterama." Smiled Spider with a clap of his hands. "This is Camp Wawanakwa and will be your home for the next thirty one days. You will have to overcome great obstacles such as hard challenges and avoided elimination in your quest to win a million dollars."

"What is this; a fantasy novel? Get on with it!" Snapped Bishop impatiently.

"Ok, err, well, anyway! This season things are going to follow the same sort of pattern as season's one and two but will have noticeable alterations. Almost everyday you will take part in a challenge; the losing team will have to attend a Bonfire Ceremony and vote somebody off. We have a few surprises when it comes to the merge so don't let your guard down."

"You will have probably noticed the three buildings behind us." Said Quana as she gestured to the three buildings. "Seeing as we aren't Chris we decided to give all of you some better living quarters this season; we were lucky to have Wallace due to his building skills. But you are going to have to earn your luxury."

Quana gestured to a large two story building painted gold with a fountain in front of it and a golden trophy sign on it.

"This is the Champion Cabin; the team that wins a challenge will be spending the night here. It has eight bedrooms, each with highly limited cable, an en suite bathroom, four poster bed and a hot water bottle. Plus there is an arcade where all the games are free."

"I so want to sleep there." Said Sasha with a blissful voice upon hearing about the game room.

"You'll have to earn it." Smirked Quana before gesturing to a single story building that was in decent condition and had two doors leading in. It had some windows and a silver trophy above the door.

"That's The Middle Place cabin; the team that comes in second will sleep there. Not exactly luxurious but it's clean and comfortable. There's one side for guys and one side for girls; each room has bunk beds, a heater and a complementary bathroom." Smiled Quana

"So there are three teams again?" Asked Alice.

"Yep; it's easier to dive you up that way and it makes the challenges more fun." Nodded Spider. "And then there is the Loser Cabin."

Spider gestured to a cabin that was one story, had one window and seemed, in one word, crappy.

"If your team loses the challenge that's where you will be spending the night as well as voting somebody off. No beds, just a blanket and a pillow each. Rest assured that there is a wall in the center of the room to divide genders." Explained Spider

"Party pooper." Muttered Gordon.

"That pretty much wraps up your sleeping arrangements; now, before the first challenge begins we'll be having lunch in the mess hall." Said Spider as he gestured to the mess hall which looked like it had been done up a fair bit.

"I am *not* eating Chef Hatchet's crap." Scowled Helen.

"It's probably not even edible." Gagged Paul at the thought of the cooking.

"Chef's got better since last season." Assured Quana. "Besides; Chef won't be serving you at the moment. Follow us and you'll see what we mean."

Confessional: The Loser Cabin looked like it should have a health hazard warning.

Nina: Chef's cooking isn't that bad; it'll be fun to throw at people! (Nina begins picking her nose).

Zed: It's a good thing I'm not a very picky eater.

Spider and Quana led the twenty five campers into the mess hall; it had also been renovated inside as well as outside. There were three long tables like those you would see in a stereotypical mansion foyer, some paintings were hung on the walls and the building smelt of food.

The campers took their seats and Raven walked out of the kitchen dressed as a waitress.

"Hi everyone." Greeted Raven with a plucky cheerful smile. "We'll be serving lunch in a matter of moments so I hope you're feeling hungry. We'll be serving a variety of foods so there is something for everyone."

"Do you have kebabs?" Asked Rheneas.

"We sure do." Nodded Raven as she headed back into the kitchen.

"Excellent; now to just take out the number one tool for eating kebabs." Said Rheneas as he reached into his pocket and took out his lighter which had the superman logo on it.

About a minute later Raven walked back out of the kitchen along with Irene, Uzuri and Tabitha, each of the latter three also dressed as waitresses though Tabitha wore stockings that completely concealed her legs. The four 'waitresses' began to dish out lunch to the contestants such as chicken sandwiches, corn on the cob, soup, kebabs and a whole lot fo other stuff.

"Dd Gary cook this?" Asked Cherry as she picked up her chicken sandwich ands squirted some ketchup on it.

"Yep!" Nodded Raven.

"Alright; now to see if he's as good a cook as he claims." Said Cherry as she bit into the sandwich. "…He is."

Rheneas lit his kebab on fire and twirled it around which made the campers sitting near him panic.

"What the hell are you doing?" Yelped Jill.

"Char broiling my kebab." Replied Rheneas as he swished it about until the flames died out. "I like my food char broiled."

Rheneas then ate his kebab contently while some of the others looked confused and amused.

"Here's your soup." Said Tabitha to Bishop as she handed him a bowl of vegetable soup.


Bishop had picked up his soup and threw it had Tabitha which made the soup made a big stain on her waitress outfit.

"Take that you filthy Democrat!" Laughed Bishop as a few others laughed too.

"But I'm Republican." Replied Tabitha before sighing glumly and walking out of the mess hall.

"That was kinda mean." Said Zed disapprovingly.

"She deserved it." Shrugged bishop.

Confessional: Soup stains are easily removed by Dazz!

Tabitha: So they all hate me do they? … Can't say I blame them really. (Tabitha sniffles sadly).

Kim: Seeing Tabitha at her all time low was hilarious; slob alert!

Rheneas: That wasn't very nice of Bishop; I can tell he's one of the bad rich people. Poor Tabitha; I hope she's alright.

Alice: The food was adequate but not perfect.

Soon enough the contestants had finished lunch and the plates were taken away by the waitresses.

"Did everyone have a good lunch?" Asked Spider.

"Three stars." Said Lankston dully.

"It was really good." Smiled Imanda.

"Well everyone follow me and Quana because it's time for your very first challenge." Said Spider excitedly.

The contestants got up and followed Spider and Quana out of the mess hall; soon only Gary and Raven were left in the building.

"Is everyone gone?" Asked Gary.

Raven peered out the door and saw no one.

"Yep; why do you- eep!" Squeaked Raven as Gary gave her butt a tight squeeze. "You bad boy! … And somehow I don't mind."

"We sure have a good season ahead of us." Smiled Gary.

"It'll be lots of fun." Grinned Raven as she gave Gary a kiss.

After lunch the contestants stood in a crowd in front of a finish line that was set up while Spider and Quana began to explain the first challenge.

"Ok everyone; are you ready for your first challenge?" Asked Spider.

Yannis made a fighting stance and made a 'bring it on' motion.

"Ok then; first of all, nobody is going to be eliminated today." Smiled Quana. "That way the audience can get more familiar with you guys and also we were in a generous mood."

"Do we have to participate if there's no chance of us losing?" Asked Kim.

"I'd recommend doing the challenge unless you want to sleep outside and not end up on a team." Warned Quana. "That's because today's challenge will play a part in deciding teams but will also determine where you will be sleeping tonight."

"You are going to … go on an Easter egg hunt!" declared Spider and Quana in usion.

"…It's not even Easter." Pointed out Xyly.

"She's right." Agreed Eddie.

"Well every reality show has at least one off season challenge." Justified Spider. "Anyway; your challenge is simple. Just go around the island and look for an Easter egg, you'll know them when you see them. After you've found one all you have to do is cross the line and you'll complete the challenge."

"Is there any penalty for finishing last?" Asked Ulric.

"Nope; consider this challenge as a tutorial of some kind." Said Quana. "It's also a chance for you to get to know each other as I bet you'll want to be searching in teams."

"Anyway; you may go when I say go." Said Spider. "… Go!"

The contestants quickly began to team up and head out into the woods as the first challenge of the new season began. One thing was certain; a Chris-less season is a good season!

And that's the first chapter! Pretty long but the next chapter will probably be longer. And besides; introducing twenty five characters takes a little while.

So; what do you think? Good? Bad? Mediumish? Let me know in a review!