Second Chances



Harry sighed again as he looked around his empty living room. His children were all grown and focused on their own lives that they tended to forget about him. That was fine; he just hated how lonely he always was now. It had been 136 years since the Battle of Hogwarts and he still remembers it as if it was yesterday; especially since his divorce with Ginny 5 years ago, he felt like he had no one in this world left for him. Moony and Sirius, and Albus and Snape and Fred and Tonks all dead in a war where he came out as the victor, he missed them all every day. It was a struggle for him to get up and live everyday when he felt like this and the thought of killing himself came forth to the front of his mind more and more every day. He shook his head; he didn't want their sacrifices to be in vain, even if he did defeat the greatest Dark Lord of all time, he had to live not only for himself but for them. He had a lot of regrets and he wished every day that he had known then what he knew now. So lost in his thoughts he didn't hear Fawkes trilling to him, in response to his feelings. Every time he looked at Fawkes he felt the loss of Albus, and although he loved the Phoenix as his familiar he would give him up if it meant his Headmaster would come back.

*Harry, why are you feeling like this child?*

*It's not worth it any more; I can't live with all this guilt on my chest. It's threatening to suffocate me Fawkes. I wish they were all alive, is there no spell to bring them back?*

*I'm so sorry my dear child, there isn't one, if there were I would have given it to you years ago.*

*Then I hope they can forgive me one day for what I'm going to do.*

*You'll do no such thing Harry Potter, I won't allow it.*

*And how are you going to accomplish that Fawkes? No offence but you are still just a bird.*

*Harry you can't do this, think of your family.*

*They all have their own lives, for once I just want to be selfish and do something for me.*

*And what exactly is that, why do you want to kill yourself?*

*Because mostly everyone I fought for has died, or wish they had. You've seen Ron and Neville and let's not forget what happened to Hermione. I wish I could just go back and fix everything, and see them all alive again, I wish it was possible but there is no point living, life with what ifs.*

*What if I told you there was a way Harry?*

*Fawkes didn't you just hear me say, there is no point in thinking on what ifs. They only lead to heartbreak, knowing there is nothing you can do to prevent it.*

*Your wrong Harry, I have been around since the days of the founders and I know of a way for you to travel into the past.*

*How, don't give me false hope Fawkes, I can't handle it.*

*It's not false Harry, it would just take a powerful wizard like yourself to perform it.*

*What's the spell? And when can I do it?*

*It's an ancient spell one which I will tell you after you get all your affairs in order.*

*What do you mean?*

*You said you wanted to go back and prevent things from happening, but how can you do that without a plan. It will take you about 1 month to get everything together, and to make sure your magic is up to full strength. Do you still want to do it?*

*Of course do you even have to ask.*

*Then go, start getting prepared.*

Harry hadn't felt this happy since he was in school with all his friends, and he couldn't wait until the month was over. He went and tried to spend time with his remaining friends and his kids and made sure he had ample pictures of them to take with him. He didn't want to forget any of them, not that he thought he would it was just in case. He made sure he visited his vault to grab his parents will; he would be damn if he spent another childhood with the Dursleys. After the defeat of Voldermort when he visited his parent's vault he was stunned to find the will of his parents and that Severus turned out to be his mother's choice of his Godfather. This time around he had to make sure that Sirius didn't suffer in prison, he had so many things he needed to do. He enchanted a pouch to make it bottomless and put everything important to him in it, and he made it weightless, along with a few nasty shocks for anyone who tried to remove it from his neck. For another safety precaution he charmed it invisible so no one could see it unless he allowed them to. When he had gathered everything he needed and wanted together he was surprised at how fast that month went by. He said his goodbyes to his friends, and waited for Fawkes.

*Are you positive you still want to do this Harry?*

*Yes, I do my mind hasn't changed Fawkes.*

*Then get ready Harry.*

*Wait, when would I go back?*

*I'm not exactly sure, probably to the first turning point in your life.*

*So I won't be able to save my parents?*

* I'm sorry child, you won't be able to go that far.*

*That's alright; I'll make sure their sacrifice won't be in vain. I'm ready Fawkes.*

*Brace yourself child, for this is going to hurt.*

Harry grimaced at that, and watched as Fawkes trilled a spell that was made up of Latin and so many other languages that he found himself lost. Then a flash of light engulfed his body and he found himself screaming his self hoarse from the pain of it. The last thing he remembered before he blacked out what Fawkes telling him he would be ok. But as the pain took over his body, Harry wondered if he would ever be ok again. He found himself for the first time thinking that maybe this wasn't such a good idea, the pain was worse than being hit over and over with Crucio. Finally the blissfulness of darkness took over him and he knew no more.