Disclaimer: Burn Notice still doesn't belong to me unfortunately
A/N: After watching 5x15 this is a scene I would have liked to have seen at the end of the episode.
Special thanks as always to Purdy's Pal and DaisyDay for reading through this for me.
This is especially for Purdy's Pal who asked me to write a Madeline and Benny piece. So here's the result with some Michael and Fiona thrown in, just because…
Madeline's mind was still in complete turmoil. She couldn't seem to process what had actually happened when Michael practically ran from the car towards Benny's house. Shock imprinted itself in her mind and she couldn't erase the image of shattering windows and billowing smoke. Only yesterday she'd had lunch with the man who had blatantly lied to her. And last week, she had almost stayed the night.
Michael had brought her home and she'd just walked in through the door and let him guide her towards the couch. She vaguely remembered something about it not being her fault and that he was sorry. Well of course it wasn't her damn fault. She didn't ask for any of this crap.
Two months ago this wonderful man had walked into her life and taken her breath away. He had showered her with affection and made her feel like she was something really special, but she should have listened to her instincts when everything was telling her that a man like Benny wouldn't be interested her.
She could hear Michael's voice speaking into his phone and she knew right away that he was talking to Fiona. He had a tone in his voice that he always used for her, just like the glazed over look in his eyes when she was around. Benny had looked at her like that too. Except everything that Benny had told her had been a lie.
He even continued deceiving her when he'd come home to find her in his house, accepting her explanation of why she was there. He was a liar in every sense of the words, but she had lied too. She sat there opposite him at that table, trying not to choke on the salmon she had brought over for them. Every time he had smiled that charming smile she knew it was just a little more of the deceit he'd been planning all along.
Had he really had feelings for her? How could he have felt anything when he had listened to everything she'd told him in confidence, and repeated her words to another man? She'd listened to him drone on over their meal and not listened to a word he'd said. All she could hear in her mind over and over again were lies after lies after lies.
Casting her mind back she could still feel the elation in her heart when he'd approached her at the store. She should have suspected something then, but she was already so enamoured by him that she couldn't think straight. He won her over with his charming smile and the way he made her feel like a desirable woman. She hadn't felt so loved in such a long time and that made his betrayal cut all the more deeper.
"Mom," Michael's voice spoke beside her, jarring her out of her thoughts and she turned to face him. "Fi's coming over. She asked if you need anything."
Madeline stared at him with a blank expression. She wanted to ask him if he could turn back time and take her to the point just before Benny had come into her life, but she didn't. She settled for a shake of the head before turning her eyes away from him again to fix her gaze on the same spot on the opposite wall.
Michael sighed heavily as he walked back towards the kitchen. He had spent the last hour trying to talk to her but whatever he'd said fell on deaf ears. He knew she was hurt, but so was he. Did she think that he wanted her to be alone for the rest of her life?
The kitchen door opened and he suddenly felt the whole atmosphere change. Fiona breezed in and slowly walked in to stand beside him, instantly easing the ache in his body when she slipped her hand into his.
"How's she doing?" she asked softly, leaning into his shoulder as she spoke.
"She's been staring off into space for the last half hour," he whispered as he bent to kiss the top of her head. "I don't know what to say to her."
Fiona swallowed heavily when she moved away from him slightly so she could look up into his eyes. She could see the concern clouding his features and for that one moment she was transported back to a night a long time ago. He'd had the same look about him on the night he'd cooked her dinner and taken her straight to bed. She knew too well how it felt to be abandoned by the one person you loved most in the world. It was a feeling she never wanted to feel again. Reaching up a hand she laid her palm against his cheek and pulled down his forehead so he was level with hers.
"I do," she whispered softly as she kissed his lips with the briefest of touches before she pulled back to meet his gaze. "I'll talk to her."
"I don't think she wants to talk, Fi," he whispered when she wrapped her fingers around his hand. "She'll never forgive me for this."
"She loves you Michael," Fiona's voice filtered through his thoughts, drawing his attention back to her. "She just needs some time."
"I hope you're right," he sighed when he pulled her into his chest and wrapped his arms around her. He couldn't seem to shake that look in his mother's eyes when she'd sat in the charger beside him. He'd seen that same look on Fiona's face so many years ago when she discovered he'd been lying to her. Even though he'd enjoyed his life as a spy he'd learned the hard way that actions had big consequences.
Sensing his thoughts, Fiona kissed his shirt covered chest before pulling out of his arms to hold on to his hands. "I forgave you. She will too."
Michael nodded with resignation when she gave his fingers a reassuring squeeze before she turned away from him to walk towards his mother.
Madeline closed her eyes when she felt the couch dip beside her. Her thoughts were in turmoil and her whole world felt like it was crumbling around her and there wasn't a damn thing she could do about it. The last thing she wanted to do was talk, but she had always found it so hard to ignore the young woman who had taken up residence beside her.
"Madeline," Fiona whispered her name and reached a hand out to touch her bare arm, but Madeline didn't acknowledge her. "I'm really sorry about Benny."
"I thought he liked me," she finally whispered before she slowly opened her eyes. "None of it felt like a lie."
"I know," Fiona told her softly as she shuffled closer to wrap the older woman's hand in both of hers. "And when you find out the truth you're in too deep for it not to hurt."
Fiona's words brought Madeline out of her daze as she turned towards the younger woman beside her and looked down at their joined hands. "I thought he really had feelings for me," she whispered brokenly. "For the first time in my life I actually felt like I meant something to someone…and now I find out everything he told me was a lie…"
"Oh Madeline," Fiona's voice caught in her throat as she met the other woman's tearful gaze. "You can't know that. I saw the way he looked at you, that wasn't a lie. You can't fake something like that."
"That's easy to say when you're not on the other end of it honey," Madeline told her as she pulled her hand away to reach across the table for a cigarette.
Fiona swallowed heavily when she looked back towards the kitchen to see Michael's gaze still focused on them. She knew exactly how it felt to be lied to and when Madeline shook off her concern she felt something inside her break.
"You feel betrayed," Fiona told her as she sat up a little straighter. "When you find out that the man you love so much has been lying to you for the whole time you were together, you begin to wonder if he felt anything for you at all."
"Fi," Madeline asked softly when she looked down at the unlit cigarette in her hand. "How—"
"I fell in love with your son the moment I met him," Fiona sighed wistfully when the memories of their first meeting filled her mind. "We spent every moment together for six months. We slept in the same bed for five of them…And then one day he's gone…no note, no goodbye…just…gone…"
"What did you do?" Madeline asked her softly as she blinked back her own sorrow before it spilled over onto her cheeks.
"I fell apart," Fiona's voice was soft when she spoke as the memories from that day filled her mind. "I was in love with a man who even lied to me about his real name. Everything he'd told me had been a lie and I started to wonder if I meant anything to him at all."
"I feel that too," Madeline told her quickly when the first tear slipped down her cheek.
"It hurts doesn't it?" Fiona asked her softly as she reached out to take her hand.
"Spies don't think like we do Madeline. Assets are people they use and throw away like we're nothing. I found that out the hard way too…"
"But you survived," Madeline told her brokenly. "You found him again."
"I did," Fiona smiled, even though she could still feel the sadness well inside her. "We've finally got to a point in our lives when everything is where it should be and someone is threatening to rip us apart…and we're right back to where we started all those years ago."
"I just feel so…empty," Madeline's voice trembled as she spoke, and when Fiona's hand clasped hers tighter she held on to her like a lifeline. "I feel…"
"Violated?" Fiona offered softly when Madeline turned to face her. Leaning closer to the older woman Fiona laid her head against her shoulder and sighed heavily when Madeline relaxed against her.
"Yeah…something like that…"
They stayed in the same position for what seemed like hours before Madeline wiped her eyes and sat up a little straighter. Lifting the cigarette to her lips she looked around for her lighter and was surprised to see Michael appear beside her. Lifting a silver lighter he sparked it into a flame and held it under her cigarette, meeting her sorrowful gaze.
"Mom…" he tried to find the right words to say that could convey to her just how sorry he was for everything, but she stopped him before she could continue.
"It's okay, honey," she told him softly as she reached out to hold onto his hand. "It's wasn't your fault."
Michael shook his head and closed his eyes briefly before opening them again to focus on his mother. She looked so tired and so defeated that he couldn't help but feel responsible.
"Why don't you two go on home?" Madeline told them, turning her attention to the young woman beside her. "I'll be fine."
"We can stay tonight," Fiona told her softly as she met Michael's eyes. When he nodded she pressed further. "Why don't we order something for dinner and…talk?"
"That's really nice of you sweetheart," Madeline told her with a slight smile. "But I don't think I could eat anything tonight…I might just go to bed."
Michael sat back when his mother pushed herself forward to get up from the couch. Taking a shaky breath she patted Michael face affectionately before she moved passed him and headed towards her bedroom. Turning back she offered the couple a watery smile before she disappeared down the corridor.
Fiona laid her head against the back of the couch and let out the breath she'd been holding. So much had happened over the last few weeks and it was showing no sign of ending.
"Do you think she'll be okay?" Fiona asked wearily when he came to sit beside her, lifting his arm so she could snuggle into his chest.
"I hope so," he sighed, his breath fanning her hair as he kissed her head. "It wasn't all a lie when we met, Fi."
Fiona shifted beside him and slipped her hand across his stomach to hook her thumb in the waistband of his jeans. "I know…but when you left you made me question everything we had…and I wanted to make you suffer for so long."
"I would have deserved it," he sighed as he laid his cheek against the top of her head. "I really didn't want to leave you, but my cover was blown and I had to get out even though it meant leaving you behind."
Fiona closed her eyes and listened to the thrum of his heart beat beneath her ear. She knew that night still haunted him, even after all this time and maybe in the past she would have enjoyed knowing that. But they were so different now; they had both grown closer and entered into this relationship with their eyes wide open.
"It's in the past," she whispered into his chest as felt his arms tighten around her. "The people we were back then don't exist anymore."
"I know, but—"
"Michael," Fiona spoke his name as she lifted herself up on one arm to tower over him. She could see the emotion in his eyes and part of her just wanted to fall into him and lose herself. There were so many levels to this man and she knew she was the only one who was privy to his emotional side. Leaning closer she pressed her lips to his and lingered over him for a few sweet moments before she pulled away to smile down at him. "Those days are gone."
A slow smile graced his lips as he reached up a hand to rest his palm against her face as he rubbed his thumb over her cheek. They had become so close over the last year and he couldn't ever imagine a future without her by his side. He knew she already knew he loved her even though neither of them had spoken the words aloud. They were just words after all, and they couldn't even compare to the feelings that she evoked inside him.
"We should get some rest," she whispered, her lips grazing his as she spoke. "It's going to be a long day tomorrow."
Their lips touched again, once, twice, until Fiona felt herself falling into him, his kiss drowning her senses. Slipping further down onto the couch, she pulled him with her so he was pressing his body into hers, revelling in her softness.
Michael's arms snaked up around her waist to encircle her shoulders, pulling her closer to him. He wanted to bury himself as deep as he possibly could into her warmth and let her ease all of the past away. Opening his mouth to deepen the kiss, he ran his tongue over her bottom lip, begging for entry. He heard himself groan as she readily complied, giving him everything in that one precious moment and he was utterly lost in her.
The kiss lasted for an eternity, building into a passionate frenzy as they both fought for control in the haze of desire. Fiona suddenly pulled away, breaking her lips from his. Her breaths were coming in deep gasps as she gazed into his eyes.
"Michael," she breathed. "I…"
Michael leaned forward to place a single finger to her lips, watching her eyes with a smouldering passion that seeped into her body. His eyes scanned her face, revelling in the rosy tint on her cheeks, knowing that he had caused her to lose control.
"Shh," he whispered, removing his finger to replace it with his lips as he pressed against her in a delicious promise, before pulling away again.
"We're on your mom's couch," she whispered, her breath fanning his lips. She knew that they should stop this and cool things down but she was finding it hard to break away from him.
"I know," his voice whispered back as they adored each other with small intoxicating kisses. His lips left her to trail across her cheek and down to her chin as all thoughts of where they were left his mind.
Fiona's hands moved to the buttons on his shirt, frantically trying to ease open the material so she could devour his chest with her hands. The powerful need to feel more of him was suddenly overtaking her senses, casting out all conscious thoughts from her mind. Every kiss of his lips on her skin brought her passions to peak, driving her insane with his touch.
He moved to his side so she could pull his shirt from beneath his belt. Her fingers raked over his bare stomach, causing him to shudder violently. He tried to regain some control by trailing wet kisses down her throat only to have her gasps intensify, adding fuel to her roaming hands.
Somewhere in the background Michael's cell phone began to ring loudly, causing him to slow his lips on her neck as he tried to push the annoying noise away from his passion-fogged brain.
"Phone," she gasped, tearing her lips away from his skin as she struggled to control his roaming hands. "Michael…"
Pulling his lips away from her neck he sat back abruptly, gasping for breath. "I have to…" he pointed somewhere behind him, "Phone."
"Yeah," she breathed, trying to control her escalating heart rate as she sat forward to watch him stand shakily to his feet. Taking a breath she moved her hands to her hair and patted down the wayward strands before she rearranged her clothing to somewhere near normal before he came back towards her with his phone pressed against his ear.
"I'll be there in half an hour," he spoke into the phone before he snapped it closed. Taking a breath he sank back against the back of the couch and closed his eyes. "I have to meet Pearce."
"Okay," she sighed as she brought her hand up to rest on his face. "I'll see you when you get back."
"I'll call you," he whispered as he closed the small gap to kiss her softly, leaving a promise on her lips.
Fiona's body was melting under his intense touch, igniting her with molten fire. She moved her hands from his as their lips parted, her eyes drifting away from his. Lifting her hands to his chest she began re buttoning the shirt she had only a short time ago ripped open in her haste to feel his skin. As she moved, her fingers brushed against his chest causing a soft gasp to escape his lips.
"You should go," she whispered reluctantly, her lips craving his again.
Michael's eyes seemed to darken in that moment; suddenly needing her with everything he possessed.
"Yeah," he whispered, his lips almost touching hers. "I will…"
When their lips touched again she found it difficult to deny him anything. His arms encircled her waist, pulling her against him tightly as he deepened the kiss. Fiona was lost, drowning in her passion as her hands moved up his chest and up to the back of his neck as she sank into his body. After a few moments their lips parted, tiny kisses keeping them linked when they were both reluctant to fully pull away.
"I…have…to…" he whispered between kisses.
"I…know," she replied softly, holding his bottom lip in between her own, tugging on it gently before releasing him completely to move away.
Michael's heart was pounding in his chest, he knew he had to leave but the sweet pull of her eyes held him there, a willing prisoner in her gaze.
"I'll stay here," she told him quietly. "Just in case your mom needs me."
"Okay," he told her then, moving closer for a second before shifting back again knowing that her touch would render him motionless. "I'll see you when I get back."
"I'll be here," she told him when he stood up from the couch, stopping briefly to watch her.
He offered her a warm smile as he moved away from her and made his way towards the door, turning one last time to watch her before he disappeared from the house. Fiona waited until she heard the Charger roar into life before she stood up to straighten out the cushions on the couch.
Her eyes drifted to the hallway and she wondered if Madeline was okay back there on her own. She could remember how much the truth hurt when Michael's deceit had become all too clear. Walking towards the kitchen she clicked the kettle on and hesitated for all of a second before she made her way down the hallways to hover outside Madeline's bedroom door.
Lifting her hand she tapped lightly on the wood with her knuckles and took a small breath. "Madeline…it's me…"