I do not own Inuyasha or its characters. Rumiko Takahashi does.
A/N: This is my first oneshot dedicated solely to the AdultRin/Sess pairing.
I do hope you enjoyed it as I've been promising this oneshot for awhile.
Summary: She wants only him, and he'll have only her.
In the days that she'd followed Sesshomaru, picking wildflowers had once been the highlight of Rin's afternoon. Weaving bouquets for the tai-youki had become her way of showing her affection for him.
Sesshomaru's acceptance of the ritual had shown his willingness to make her happy, for no self-respecting male accepted flowers from a girl, nor did they sit patiently while blossoms were weaved into his hair. While the flowers never made it beyond the edge of their camp, nor were they ever displayed in public, Sesshomaru had allowed her the privilege of gifting him with the only substance that she, as a simple human child, could give him.
As she grew older, the practice subsided, replaced instead with hot meals to satiate his hunger and fresh water to satisfy his thirst. In return, Sesshomaru continued to keep her safe, providing food, shelter, and the fine kimonos that clothed her.
But things changed as Rin got older. Gradually, their companionship shifted. Sesshomaru began shying away from her. He insisted that she sleep alone while he sought the refuge of the forest. He was always nearby should she need him, yet far enough away to guarantee that any nearby villagers wouldn't view her as anything but pure.
She hadn't understood it at the time - what it meant for her to have an unsullied reputation. It wasn't until she'd overheard some village girls talking that she'd finally understood. Women who took demons as lovers were looked down upon, considered dirty in the eyes of their human neighbors. In keeping his distance, Sesshomaru had guaranteed she would be viewed as a highly prized bride, one who would bring any prospective husband a dowry that would leave them wealthier than most in the region could ever hope to obtain.
Sitting alone in the meadow, Rin contemplated her current predicament; Sesshomaru had decided to leave her in the village. His reasoning? Her supposed need of a husband. It had taken years for their group to defeat Naraku, and through those years Sesshomaru and Inuyasha had managed to find common ground in their shared desire to care for and protect their human pack members. Sesshomaru felt that Inuyasha and Kagome would be sufficient in protecting her while he continued his ongoing journey, though what the tai-youki searched for seemed ever-elusive in Rin's unspoken opinion.
While staying in the village Kagome and Inuyasha called home was appealing, it wasn't what Rin wanted. She'd reached marrying age, but Rin simply wasn't interested in the mundane existence that village life entailed. Too many years living through life-and-death battles had heightened her need to live in the moment. Settling in to the ritualistic lifestyle of a simple village woman didn't appeal to her, nor did she relish the thought of a human male claiming her as his bride.
Shifting uncomfortably, Rin eyed the coming sunset with unease. She knew it wouldn't be long before someone came looking for her. She also knew that whoever sought her out would be exceedingly displeased with her apparent lack of common sense. But she couldn't find it in herself to care. She had no desire to return to the village, nor did she wish to deal with the village men who would no doubt clamber to her side.
There were a few men in the village who were easy on the eyes, but none of them had captured her attention. Many had shown interest, though not for a love like Inuyasha and Kagome shared. The village men merely saw her as their way out of poverty, a prize to be had, not a woman worth loving. Sesshomaru would guarantee her the best of everything, his care for her evident to all in the gifts he brought with every visit he made to the village. Though some made half-hearted attempts to converse with her, most only sought answers to their questions regarding Sesshomaru's latest disappearance and when he would return.
Many of the villagers were poor, barely surviving. While most detested the demons' presence in their village, they were still more than willing to accept any handout or protection said demon provided. They also knew of the hut Sesshomaru had provided her upon his decision to leave her in Inuyasha's care. Rin's home was larger than most of the huts in the village and bigger than the one Inuyasha and Kagome now shared. The space was more than what she needed since she lived alone.
Not far from the river, Rin only had to walk a few hundred feet to collect water to drink, and fish to eat. She could wash her clothing with ease, and firewood was stocked regularly by Inuyasha, and Jaken when the imp and Sesshomaru visited. While Rin was grateful for Sesshomaru's continued support, it wasn't what she wanted.
Pushing herself to her feet, Rin gathered the flowers she'd collected for Kagome and Sango and began the journey back to her home, her thoughts still running wild. What she wanted was a life with Sesshomaru. He was her best friend, her guardian and protector. Sesshomaru was all the things she wanted in life. She loved him, and no other male, be it human or demon, would ever compare.
But that was the problem, wasn't it? She was human. Sesshomaru was a demon. And while she had no qualms regarding interracial marriages, the villagers did - a trait that Sesshomaru seemed to share. Sesshomaru wouldn't take her for a bride because she was human. He wouldn't sire her children, nor would he stay with her in this village. She couldn't blame him on that point though. She didn't want to stay in this, or any other human village, either.
Forgoing the path she would need to take into the village to deliver her gift of flowers to Sango and Kagome, Rin altered her path. Heading into the tree line, Rin made her way toward her hut, determined to avoid the single village men who were no doubt awaiting her appearance on the trail that led to her home.
Lost in thought, Rin picked her way easily through the trees instead, a path she could follow with her eyes closed. Preferring her solitude, she intentionally made herself scarce, visiting only with the members of the group she'd grown up knowing. But even those visits were becoming few and far between.
Inuyasha and Kagome visited often, both seeming to understand her reluctance in associating with the villagers. While many of the men and women in the village were kind to her, Rin simply had no desire to associate with any of them any more than what was polite and expected. Sango and Miroku visited often, too, many times bringing their children to play in the river. Shippo and Kirara came as well. They were never too far away, their homes close enough to offer her protection when Sesshomaru was gone, yet far enough to offer her privacy.
But when night fell Rin was alone again, with only her thoughts to occupy the silence that had since become her prison.
Sesshomaru still visited regularly, though his first stop was always his brother's home. Kagome had confided once that the tai-youki often questioned the hanyou about her progress in finding a husband - a fact that Rin was finding more and more aggravating.
Sesshomaru was a powerful demon, able to garner whatever he desired by sheer willpower and strength alone. But in this, he would fail. Rin had already decided that she wouldn't settle on a loveless marriage. She wouldn't take a human mate, wouldn't tie herself to a man to whom she knew she could never give her heart.
Making her way into her home, Rin set the flowers in a vase near the door with plans to deliver them the next morning. Kicking her sandals off, she made her way to the fire pit. She'd started dinner before she'd left earlier that afternoon, and the soup she'd placed over the embers simmered lightly. The aroma would have been mouthwatering had she the appetite to eat it.
"Where have you been, Rin?"
Sesshomaru's voice startled her and Rin turned toward the futon half-hidden in the shadows at the far end of the room. The sun had set, and though her home had yet to lose all of its light, the coming darkness was already beginning to consume what light remained.
"You scared me, Sesshomaru-sama," Rin muttered distractedly. "Are you hungry? You've had a long journey. Give me a moment and I'll-"
"You know better than to be alone in the forest with no one to protect you," Sesshomaru stated, his disappointment evident, though easily missed by anyone who didn't know him as well as she did.
"I'm sorry, Sesshomaru-sama. I lost track of time…"
"Perhaps having a husband will curb your desire to explore," Sesshomaru intoned quietly. "Have you not found a suitable mate here in Inuyasha's village?"
Rin huffed in barely suppressed anger, dropping her gaze and moving once more toward the fire pit. She held her tongue, refusing to disrespect the man who had done, and continued to do, everything for her.
She jumped when Sesshomaru's hand settled on her shoulder, and she kept her gaze lowered when he turned her to face him.
"You are of age, Rin."
"I am not interested in a husband, Lord Sesshomaru-sama," Rin replied quietly. At least, none of the human variety, her mind supplied. "There are a few who are interested, but none that meet my requirements," she added.
"And what requirements have you set before them, Rin?" Sesshomaru inquired softly.
Rin merely shrugged her shoulders, still very much aware that Sesshomaru had yet to remove his hand from her person. When she didn't respond, Sesshomaru dropped his hand from her shoulder, his claw-tipped fingers caressing the length of her arm before curling around her own.
"Come sit with me, Rin," Sesshomaru invited. "I would like to hear of these requirements you mentioned."
Rin allowed herself to be pulled to the futon and sat heavily on the mattress alongside the demon she'd fallen in love with so many years earlier. While she felt no pressing desire to burden him with her growing list of reasons behind refusing a human mate, she also knew that the tai-youki beside her wouldn't take 'no' for an answer.
Silence stretched between them, but Rin refused to begin a conversation she had no interest in pursuing.
"Your reasoning, Rin?" Sesshomaru questioned a short time later, his voice leaving no room for argument.
"There is no reason for you to burden yourself further on my behalf, Sesshomaru-sama. I am happy. I am cared for and protected. What need do I have of a husband who can't offer the same level of protection that you yourself offer, or that Inuyasha and the others can provide?" Rin intoned, careful to keep her voice lowered and neutral.
"Everyone settles down, Rin. Every living thing finds a mate to guarantee the survival of its species."
"Not everything, Lord Sessomaru-sama." Rin answered, her tone clipped, her irritation with the subject beginning to make an appearance, though she struggled to keep it contained. If he had no need for a mate, then why did he think she needed one? If he could be happy alone, why did he think she couldn't be as well? It was better to be alone than to be nothing more than a trophy draped on some village man's arm. She wanted more than that, demanded more than that.
"Have I not made it readily apparent that you and yours will be taken care of? Are the men in this village so willfully ignorant?" Sesshomaru questioned. "Whomever you take as a mate will be compensated-"
"Don't you understand, Sesshomaru?" Rin snapped angrily. "I have no intention of becoming any man's prize! I will not be paraded about on some human's arm, or flaunted like a possession garnered at the local market." Pushing angrily off the futon, Rin instantly dropped her gaze, embarassment and regret washing though her. When she made to move further away from Sesshomaru's side, however, her hand was caught in his, efficiently cutting off her escape.
"You will not be paraded about like cattle, Rin. I will not allow it," Sesshomaru declared quietly.
"You think these men see anything other than a prize to be had when they look at me, Sesshomaru-sama? They see rich silks, and a large hut in a prime location. They see a woman who bears the riches borne of a tai-youki's guardianship, the protection that it will guarantee them."
"In time, Rin, you will find happiness here. In time-"
"I will be no man's trophy, Sesshomaru-sama. I would rather live and die alone that to be subjected to a loveless marriage and a passionless union," Rin interrupted.
"Many find contentment in arranged marriages, Rin. It is a normal practice in human villages," Sesshomaru offered, pulling her back to her place at his side on the futon. "The monk often speaks of humans finding love in prearranged unions."
"I will not find love with any man in this village, nor in any other village," Rin declared quietly.
"You will. It is only natural-"
"My love belongs to another, Sesshomaru-sama," Rin blurted out before fully considering her choice of words, her anger finally getting the best of her.
The widening of Sesshomaru's eyes was the only indication of the demon's surprise at her outburst, and Rin instantly regretted forgetting her place. Her anger had shown disrespect, and that had never been her intention. But the talk of loving anyone other than the demon sitting beside her had driven her past the point of carefully chosen words, exposing her secret before she'd fully considered the repercussions of her statement.
Sesshomaru hadn't considered his ward's possible attachment to another as the reason for her hesitation in accepting a human mate. While he'd long ago resigned himself to Rin's eventual marriage to a human suitor, he had not considered how he'd feel once she'd chosen her husband.
It was not something that sat well, at all.
Irrational anger blossomed deep within his stoic facade. He had no place being angry that she'd developed feelings for another. In the normal progression of things, it was to be expected, though he'd fully intended on being far away from the village before it happened.
Her impromptu declaration brought about an animalistic possessiveness he hadn't expected, something he had not considered could happen. It was he who pressed her to marry, he who deposited her in this village, and he who provided the provisions that would no doubt bring about many available suitors. Why then did her declaration of love for another anger him so?
"Who," Sesshomaru demanded, his voice lowered as he struggled to contain the unaccountable anger her revelation had inspired.
"No one, Sesshomaru-sama, forget I said anything. Nothing can ever come of it anyway," Rin whispered.
She was startled speechless when Sesshomaru turned more fully toward her, his body drawing closer as he asked again, his voice taking on a dangerous edge. "Who is he, Rin?"
"N-no one, Sess-"
Sesshomaru leaned closer still, his proximity forcing her backward onto the futon, his body hovering over her own. When his leg pressed between hers, his thigh coming in contact with her feminine core, her eyes fell closed and her breath hitched in her chest.
She could feel his hair fall around them, a curtain against the outside world. His breath ghosted over her suddenly sensitive skin when his weight settled more firmly against her body. The futon sank beneath their combined weight, the sudden shift catching her by surprise. Reaching up out of reflex, Rin found her arms around Sesshomaru's neck. Her unexpected reaction pulled his upper body flush against hers and his mouth found purchase on the skin under her ear.
The leg that wasn't trapped beneath Sesshomaru had somehow made its way up, cradling his body in a most intimate fashion, and Rin struggled to minimize her reaction to his nearness. But she instantly realized that it was too late. With him pressed so intimately against her, arousal lanced through her body, lighting a fire under her skin that she had no hope of extinguishing.
She felt his lips move against her neck, though his words were lost under the sensation of his heated breath on her skin. Sesshomaru shifted, his body freeing her trapped leg, and Rin arched against him when the movement positioned him more firmly between her thighs. Her newly freed leg moved of its own volition, curling around his waist.
His husky growl sent tremors of unbridled passion through every nerve of her body, and she shuddered involuntarily when the demon male above her used his fangs to pin her beneath him.
Unconsciously, she tipped her head further back, exposing the long line her neck, her submission earning another husky growl from the demon above her. Easing his fangs from Rin's prone form, Sesshomaru eyed the small bead of blood that trailed ever so slowly into the hollow of her throat. The desire to seal the pinpricks that had caused the release of her blood called to him on a wholly new level.
"Who," Sesshomaru nearly snarled, his body quaking with the effort it took to control the urges her scent had called forth. Her innocence called to him, the musky-spice of her arousal bringing forth a passion he'd never experienced while in a human female's presence.
"Y-" Her response was cut short when Sesshomaru shifted again, losing the battle with his desire to clean the blood from her skin. His tongue dragged slowly over Rin's heated flesh.
"Who," Sesshomaru repeated, giving up the effort it was taking to control the reaction his body was having to hers.
"You," Rin breathed. Sesshoumaru's gaze widened fractionally, but the new tension in his body had her worried that he would refuse her. The telling flush of his skin and the simmering heat in his eyes, however, gave her renewed confidence. Her hand rose, her fingers burrowing into the hair at his scalp. Her mind was lost in the haze of feelings she had never felt before and she pulled him closer, capturing his predatory gaze with hers. Once certain she held his full attention, she said again,
"You, Sesshomaru. I love you."
They were the last words Sesshomaru heard before claiming her mouth with his. His tongue plundered hers, tasting the desire her scent had already betrayed.
Centuries he'd lived, relentlessly searching the continent for something he had never been able to define. But with Rin, all it had taken was one night, one rare instance of being caught off guard by a small human woman. She had managed to do what no one had ever done - she'd captured his heart, dominating him with one softly uttered declaration.
It was long moments later when air forced them apart, that Sesshomaru heard her ask her own questions. "I am a human woman, Sesshomaru-sama. I can't give you anything other than my heart and soul. I want children, your children, but they would be hanyou. Is this what you want, Sesshomaru-sama? Am I what you want?"
Human or not, hanyou children or not, Rin was everything he'd denied himself, everything that it had taken him centuries to find. She was the only being he desperately wanted to protect. She was all he would ever need. No male, human or otherwise would take what she'd freely given to him, and him alone.
No answer was needed when Sesshomaru bent to claim her lips once more, his actions clarifying what mere words could never say.
She was his, and whatever she gave him from that moment on, was all he'd ever need.
A/N: Deserted's epilogue should be coming soon.
Color will be updated really soon, too.
I also have two poems coming.
Many thanks to Snow for beta-ing this for me.
Winter has officially hit, and it is both a good and a bad thing:
Good- because I should have more writing time as this time of year I tend to stay inside where it's warm, and
Bad: because the weather and the cold aggrivate my health conditions to a whole new level, despite my effort to stay warm.
I really hope you'll let me know what you think of this addition to my growing collection.
I'd love to hear from everyone again!